AP Seminar: Reviewing Your Individual Research Report

Summary

In this educational video, Allison Lee, a teacher at Carmel High School, provides a comprehensive guide for students on revising their Individual Research Reports (IRR) for the AP Capstone course. The focus is on enhancing the IRR's significance, given its increased weightage from 10% to 31.5% in the AP score. Lee discusses the evaluation criteria, emphasizing the importance of quality sources, particularly academic journals, and provides a detailed revision checklist. She advises students to ensure their research questions are narrow, well-articulated, and that their writing is clear, academic, and proofread. The video concludes with tips on improving the IRR and the option to resubmit for a better score.

Takeaways

• 📚 The lesson focuses on the revision process for the Individual Research Report (IRR), which has increased in importance from 10% to 31.5% of the AP score.
• 🔍 The teacher emphasizes the importance of having a complete draft of the IRR before beginning the revision process, even if it's a rough first draft.
• 🎯 The revision process should aim to improve the IRR based on the rubric's criteria, which includes context, understanding of arguments, quality of evidence, and citations.
• 📈 The rubric's rows 1 & 3 are assessed together, focusing on the context and quality of evidence, including the variety and credibility of sources.
• 📘 The teacher suggests an average of 7 to 10 sources for the IRR, with a preference for academic journals and a range of perspectives.
• 🔗 It's crucial to ensure that all sources are properly cited both in-text and on the bibliography/reference page for consistency.
• 🤔 The paper should be divided into at least two perspectives, each clearly articulated and connected to demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of different viewpoints.
• 🗣 The use of academic language and formality is essential; the teacher advises against using 'I' and 'you' as they make the writing seem informal.
• ✅ The clarity of communication, adherence to the word count, and proper formatting are critical for achieving high scores in rows 5 & 6.
• 👀 The teacher recommends proofreading and using tools or having others read the paper to catch errors and improve the writing.
• 📝 The strength of the IRR is significantly influenced by the quality of the sources used, with a strong emphasis on peer-reviewed journals and academic sources.

Q & A

What is the main focus of the second part of Lesson 10?

The main focus of the second part of Lesson 10 is to guide students on how to transition to the revision process of their Individual Research Report (IRR) to improve its quality, given the increased weight of the IRR in their AP scores.

Who is Allison Lee and what is her role in this video?

Allison Lee is a teacher at Carmel High School in Carmel, Indiana, and in this video, she is presenting the second part of Lesson 10, specifically focusing on the revision process for the IRR.

What is the significance of the increase in weight for the IRR in AP scores?

The increased weight for the IRR in AP scores, from 10% to 31.5%, highlights the importance of the IRR and necessitates that students submit the best possible version of their report.

What does Allison Lee suggest students do before revising their IRR?

Allison Lee suggests that students should have a complete draft of their IRR, even if it's a first draft that needs improvement, before they start the revision process.

How many sources does Allison Lee recommend including in the IRR?

Allison Lee recommends including roughly seven sources in the IRR, as this number helps to illustrate that research has been conducted and provides a variety of perspectives.

What is the importance of academic sources in the IRR according to the transcript?

Academic sources, especially peer-reviewed journals, are important in the IRR because they contribute to a high score on the rubric, particularly for rows 1 & 3, which focus on the quality and variety of sources.

What does Allison Lee mean by 'perspective' in the context of the IRR?

In the context of the IRR, a 'perspective' refers to a distinct viewpoint or argument presented in the report, which should be clearly articulated and not simply an occupation or lens.

Why is it important to have a conversation between perspectives in the IRR?

Having a conversation between perspectives in the IRR is important because it shows the connections and relationships between different viewpoints, enhancing the depth and coherence of the report.

What are the main aspects Allison Lee covers in the revision process for the IRR?

The main aspects Allison Lee covers in the revision process for the IRR include evaluating the quality and variety of sources, ensuring perspectives are clearly articulated and connected, and checking for conventions and citations.

What advice does Allison Lee give regarding the word count for the IRR?

Allison Lee advises students to adhere to the word count specified by the College Board, which is 1200 words, and to ensure that their writing is clear, cohesive, and focused.

What is the final advice Allison Lee gives to students regarding their IRR?

Allison Lee's final advice is for students to focus on the quality of their sources, as this is the most significant factor in the grade they will receive for the IRR. She also encourages students to take the time to revise and improve their IRR, considering the increased weight in their AP scores.

Outlines

00:00

📚 Introduction to Lesson 10 Part B

Allison Lee, a teacher at Carmel High School, introduces the second part of Lesson 10, focusing on the transition from the Individual Research Report (IRR) to the revision process. The lesson aims to guide students on improving their IRRs, which now carry more weight in their AP scores, moving from 10% to 31.5%. Allison emphasizes the importance of having a complete draft before beginning revisions and provides a brief overview of the lesson's objectives, which include reflecting on and revising students' writing, thinking, and creative processes. She also outlines the areas of focus for the revision, based on the IRR rubric, and encourages students to pause the video if they have not yet completed a draft of their IRR.

05:01

🔍 Evaluating Sources and Context in the IRR

The paragraph delves into the specifics of how the IRR is scored, particularly focusing on rows 1 and 3 of the rubric, which assess the quality and variety of sources used in the report. Allison advises students to include approximately seven sources, with a preference for academic journals, to demonstrate a range of perspectives. She contrasts examples of well-chosen sources with those that rely too heavily on news media, emphasizing the importance of academic credibility. The paragraph also touches on the need to situate the research within the current context, establish the significance of the topic, and clearly state the individual research question, ensuring it is narrow and focused.

10:03

🗣️ Analyzing Perspectives and Argument Connections

Allison continues with an in-depth look at rows 2 and 4 of the rubric, which pertain to the presentation of perspectives and arguments within the IRR. She explains that a paper should be divided into at least two perspectives, each clearly articulated as a claim. The paragraph stresses the importance of showing connections between perspectives and using multiple sources to support each one. Allison warns against labeling perspectives as occupations or lenses, which do not represent genuine argumentative positions. She provides examples of how to effectively transition between perspectives and how to use sources to build a conversation within each section, enhancing the coherence and strength of the argument.

15:06

✍️ Finalizing the Revision Process and Ensuring Clarity

This paragraph addresses the final aspects of the revision process, focusing on rows 5 and 6 of the rubric, which pertain to conventions and citations. Allison reminds students to adhere to the word count, ensure clarity and coherence in their writing, and maintain an academic and formal tone. She advises against using words like 'I' and 'you' excessively, as they can make the writing seem informal. The paragraph also emphasizes the importance of proofreading for errors and checking formatting, including headings, subheadings, and citations. Allison provides examples of student responses to illustrate the difference between low- and high-performing work, highlighting the need for clear, concise, and well-structured writing.

20:06

🏆 Conclusion and Advice for IRR Revisions

In the concluding paragraph, Allison summarizes the key points of the lesson and offers final advice for students revising their IRRs. She reiterates the significance of using credible and vetted sources, particularly peer-reviewed journals, to ensure a high score. Allison encourages students to take advantage of the opportunity to resubmit their IRRs, given the increased weight of the assignment, and to reach out to their teachers for guidance on revisions. She also reminds students to contact the College Board for any technical issues and ends the lesson on a positive note, wishing them luck in their writing and revision process.

Keywords

💡IRR

IRR stands for Individual Research Report, which is a central component of the AP Research course. In the video, the teacher emphasizes the importance of revising the IRR to improve its quality, given that it now carries a significant weight of 31.5% in the AP score. The script mentions the need to evaluate and improve various aspects of the IRR, such as the quality of sources, the clarity of perspectives, and the overall coherence and academic tone of the writing.

💡Revision Process

The revision process is a critical part of improving the IRR. The script discusses the need for students to reflect on their writing, think about how to improve their IRR, and understand the evaluation criteria. The teacher provides guidance on how to approach the revision, including checking the number and type of sources, ensuring the research question is clear and narrow, and making sure the writing is academic and formal.

💡Rubric

A rubric is a set of criteria used to evaluate work, and in this video, it refers to the specific guidelines for scoring the IRR. The teacher breaks down the rubric into rows 1 through 6, explaining how each aspect of the IRR will be assessed. For example, rows 1 and 3 focus on the quality and variety of sources, while rows 2 and 4 look at the presentation of perspectives and the connections between them.

💡Sources

Sources are the references and materials used in the IRR to support the student's research. The script highlights the importance of including a variety of high-quality sources, particularly academic journals, to establish credibility and earn a high score on the IRR. The teacher advises students to ensure they have enough sources and that they are not relying too heavily on news media or a single type of source.

💡Perspectives

Perspectives in the context of the IRR refer to the different viewpoints or arguments presented by the sources. The script mentions that a paper should be divided into at least two perspectives, each clearly articulated as a claim. The teacher also warns against confusing perspectives with occupations or lenses, emphasizing the need for distinct and clearly defined viewpoints.

💡Citations

Citations are the formal acknowledgments of the sources used in the IRR. The script discusses the importance of proper citation for academic integrity and for earning points on rows 5 and 6 of the rubric. The teacher reminds students to ensure that citations are consistent and correctly formatted, both in-text and in the bibliography.

💡Conventions

Conventions refer to the standard rules and practices of academic writing, including grammar, punctuation, and style. The script mentions that row 6 of the rubric assesses conventions, indicating that students should proofread their work to avoid errors and ensure their writing is clear, cohesive, and academic in tone.

💡Research Question

The research question is the specific inquiry that the IRR aims to explore. The script emphasizes the need for students to clearly state their research question within the paper and to ensure that it is narrow in focus and scope. The research question guides the entire IRR and helps to establish the context and significance of the research.

💡Academic Journals

Academic journals are scholarly publications that contain articles written by experts in a particular field. In the script, the teacher highlights the value of including academic journal articles as sources in the IRR because they are considered credible and peer-reviewed, which can contribute to a higher score on the rubric.

💡Word Count

The word count is a limit on the length of the IRR, set by the College Board at 1200 words. The script mentions the word count as part of the conventions and citations row 5 & 6, indicating that students must ensure their revised IRR does not exceed this limit to meet the requirements and score well.

Highlights

Lesson 10 Part B focuses on transitioning from the Individual Research Report (IRR) to the revision process.

The IRR now carries more weight, moving from 10% to 31.5% of the AP score.

Students are encouraged to reflect and revise their writing to improve their IRR based on the new weight.

The lesson provides a checklist for self-assessment and peer assessment of the IRR.

Row 1 & 3 of the rubric assess the quality and variety of sources used in the IRR.

A recommendation of including roughly seven sources for a well-rounded perspective.

The importance of including academic journal sources for credibility and scoring.

Row 2 & 4 emphasize the presentation of different perspectives and the connections between them.

The necessity of clearly articulating the argument within each perspective.

The need for transitions between perspectives to show connections and flow.

Row 5 & 6 cover conventions and citations, emphasizing formal and clear writing.

Advice on avoiding informal language and maintaining an academic tone in the IRR.

The significance of proofreading for excessive errors that can affect the score.

Checking for proper formatting and consistent citations as part of the revision process.

The impact of using credible academic sources on the strength and score of the IRR.

The option for teachers to read and remove student submissions for resubmission if needed.

Encouragement for students to reach out to College Board for device or internet access issues.

The final advice to focus on the quality of sources as a key factor in the IRR grade.

The partnership between the AP Capstone and Course Seminar and Research teams in providing support.

Transcripts

hi ap7 our students and teachers thanks

for joining me for our last video mr.

Gonzalez has the first part of lesson 10

but I have the second part just a

reminder I am Allison Lee I'm a teacher

at Carmel High School in Carmel Indiana

so for our lesson today we are on lesson

10 Part B we are actually going to shift

gears completely from the IWA to looking

at the individual research report or the

irr as I know most of you have already

written these the focus today is just

how we transition to the revision

process so that we can make it better

now that it has a more significant

weight because we're going from that 10%

to now 31 and a half so we want to make

sure that it is better

and since our AP score is only coming

from two documents now so if we focus on

our objectives number one we're going to

reflect and revise on our own writing

thinking and creative processes so that

we one refresh our memory and understand

how the IRR is evaluated and to

understand how to best revise and

improve your current IRR because again

we want to turn in the best products

that we possibly can so let's get right

into it

before though I continue I just want to

put a pause in here for you to stop if

you have not yet written a complete

draft of your IRR and I know that may

sound odd to some of you but for some of

you you have not actually done that

maybe you've told your teachers you

would or you put it off and then you got

to do virtual schooling but either way

make sure you have that complete draft

before you continue and because if we're

gonna talk about revision we have to

have something even if it is a crappy

first draft and so that we can then work

to improve for the rubric we're gonna

focus on each of these rows and we're

going to put them together in groups and

as someone who has scored the IRR and

actually I've graded all the parts of

exams but the IRR is the part that I

have graded the most so I feel the most

confident talking you through the

scoring of this rubric and rows 1 & 3

are essentially assessed together

and then so those are going to focus

really a lot on you more sources even

though the first one says context so

we're gonna talk to those together we'll

look at rows two and four together there

is some variation and then just like we

did for the IWA i'm not going to spend a

ton of time on rows five and six because

they are the same essentially as the IWA

which is conventions and um citations

essentially is what we're looking at

although they both say of like

conventions okay so real quick Row one

we're talking about context and your

ability to show the context Row two

we're looking at your ability to

actually clearly understand and present

your understanding of the arguments of

other sources Row three is about the

quality of evidence you are using for is

your ability to make connections among

perspectives and sources and then like I

said five and six we've got citations

and then we've got conventions so let's

get into the actual revision process so

what we did is we wanted to make sure

that you guys had a checklist where you

could ask yourself questions go back

through your document or work with a

peer so any of these slides where you're

singing a bunch of questions feel free

to pause self assess or peer assess and

then come back and hear a more

explanation about what this looks like

so number one did you include roughly

seven sources now College Board does not

give a number I am giving seven only

because if I have to include a variety

of perspectives multiple perspectives

and a variety of sources it's really

hard to do that with resources so on

average just as a greater the number I

tend to see the most that successfully

done is somewhere in the seven to ten

range so again that is just my own

understanding of what this looks like

but you have to have a range so how many

sources do you have and do enough to

illustrate that you did research number

two of the sources included how many are

from academic journals how many are

academic how many are journalism or

journalistic sources those news media

that we talked about in lesson eight of

the sources that are included how many

come from experts and if they all come

let's say they all came from a Journal

of law they're all coming from the same

type of experts so do you have a variety

of experts begin sir

would be no you need to include experts

that encompass a range and a variety we

don't just want one voice represented

are all the citations on your

bibliography reference page we're

excited actually consistent if they

appear on your bibliography do they

appear in text and if they appear in

text do they appear on your bibliography

okay so rows 1 & 3 are really looking at

your sources so the first thing I'm

trying to do as a grater is actually to

look at that reference page so again

like mr. Gonzalez was talking about in

lesson 9 make sure you're giving more

thought than an afterthought when it

comes to references so if we look at

this sample one here's a paper that had

seven sources if I'm a grader and I look

at this the first thing I'm noticing

I've got a journal I've got an academic

source I've got a journal a good a

journal I've got a journal this student

is going to get a high score on sources

already like I don't even need to see

the paper I know the student can get a

high score unless they do something

terribly terribly wrong because the

composition five out of the seven

sources are great sources they are

academic journals and they all don't

come from the same academic journal

there's a variety represented okay if

you want to pause and look further their

bibliography or we're excited you

absolutely care okay here's a different

students were excited so I want to show

you the difference here look we've got

news media news media news media you

have three new sources although they're

different HuffPost USA Today and NBC

they're still the same type we don't

have anything academic then I've got

another new source and another new

source and another one right Washington

Post ABC Business Insider okay of the 14

sources that I'm seeing here I don't

have anything academic in terms of a

journal I don't have anything

peer-reviewed and I really have an over

reliance on news media so this student

cannot earn a high score on real one

unless they do something absolutely

magical in the paper to prove that

there's a lot of credibility here okay

the more academic sources you have in

your bibliography or reference pages the

less work you actually have to do in the

body of your paper

actually in your paper if we look at a

conversation this would be rows 1 & 3

and we're looking at what it looks like

so you'll notice that we have the

author's at the top co-directors of the

National Alliance of the mentally ill

long term care and then we have this

extra information that's meant to give

attribution and credibility these

credibility tags right through the

co-directors we also see later we have

the president of the World Association

for psychosocial rehabilitation and

professor of general and social

psychiatry at Athens University so if

you are relying heavily on news media

you have to do so much more to prove to

us that your sources have credibility

but for those of you using academic

sources you've already done all the work

you can have short little credibility

tags and then we know that you have good

sources your grade on the IRR for rows 1

& 3 comes down to the quality of your

sources if you have academic sources and

academic journals you are just killing

it in terms of these rows which is

really really good okay so again pause

the video if you want to read through

the whole paragraph you can see but we

have those credibility tags so then the

last part that's assessed on rows 1 & 3

is essentially coming from your

introduction so we've talked about

sources the other part that gets

assessed is the narrowness and focus of

your question so did you situate your

research in the current context remember

we talked about this and it's the same

as the IWA did you use sources to

establish the context did you help us

understand why this topic matters and if

there's significance optionally and I

put this on there because some of you

haven't and don't want you to see think

you can't did you identify your groups

question and did you show us how your

individual question is contributing

that's an optional for putting the group

question and some of you may not have

even gotten as far to have a group

question and the other thing that you

absolutely do have to have is your

individual question some students if you

look at the sample papers put their

individual question as their title but

it's still listed make sure you state

your research question if your research

question is not stated anywhere in your

paper you need to go back in and make

sure you put it in okay

also is your

question narrow in focus and scope do we

know the who what why when where is that

really been developed and are we

specific about what you're looking for

okay and then did you explicitly tell us

why we should care use sources to do

that but make sure that you've given us

that full range so let's look at what

this looks like so if look at the sample

introduction and you can just see from

the color coding all of the yellow that

this student did was using sources to

establish the context and to establish

the significance and then at the end

what they did is they gave us a claim

now they didn't write their question

they instead wrote more of a claim you

could easily just put your question in

here at the end and then we get the

focus of the conversation and you do not

have to have an argument this is not an

argument paper it is a report about

other people's arguments but make sure

your question is narrow and presented

somewhere this student used his question

or her question as a title so in

actuality and majority of the Release

patients experience unintentional

negative consequences of the

institutionalization such as

homelessness incarceration and isolation

due to the absence of the promise

community care so that is what the focus

of the IRR is going to look at is this

the institutionalization in terms of its

focus on homelessness incarceration and

isolation so the student has been very

very narrow in terms of what they're

looking at and all of the yellow is all

of the work that he or she did to help

establish why this topic matters okay so

that really covers rows 1 through 3

reminder Row 1 and 3 are attached to the

quality of your sources so the more

academic sources you have the better if

you go through your reference page we're

excited bibliography right now and you

code things based on what they are write

down how many our news media how they

are academic and if you find that you

don't have any academic or academic

journals you got a research you know

throw in better sources do not just be

complacent with what you have because

it's already done the weight has

increased okay if you go through your

page and you're like Oh academic journal

academic journal and the majority of

what you have is academic journals give

yourself a pat on the back because you

do not

have to re research which is awesome all

right so let's shift to rows 2 & 4 so 4

2 & 4 and they are essential team

together but there is a little bit of

variation so I will talk to you about

that as we go we're going to start with

perspectives is your paper divided into

at least two perspectives and remember

perspective is the same as argument is

each perspective written as a claim or

in a way that clearly articulates the

argument that's going to be made in that

section and the argument from the

sources you do not have to make an

argument so it's not your argument and

if your perspectives are simply titles

of occupations or lenses make sure you

fix those those are not the same

perspective it's not an occupation nor

is it a lens okay

look at the first sentence between each

perspective to see if you've

transitioned explicitly to show those

connections you need to have connections

between perspectives not just between

sources so let's remind ourselves

perspectives so the first one the impact

of one's social life on gaming addiction

and the impact of gaming addiction on

one's social life so what we see here is

it's very clear what the focus is going

to be some students have two

perspectives some have three it's up to

you if you find yourself in the five

range I would definitely recommend that

you go back through and see if you can

pair down because within perspectives

you have to have multiple voices and

it's really hard to do more than three

perspectives really well in 1200 words

which is our word count okay the impact

of de institutionalisation movement on

homelessness on crime and isolation so

they have three different sections in

this high-scoring now what a perspective

is not it is not an occupation

repeatedly as a grader I will say the

number one thing I can tell when a kid

doesn't really get perspective is they

claim that their perspective is an

occupation nurses perspective gamers

perspective research perspective those

are occupations right not everybody with

the same occupation has the same

argument or the same perspective there

is probably you know a teacher out there

who teaches at a public school but who

sends their students to a private school

because they prefer that for their

children right but then there are

teachers who think that public education

they teach in public education and I

think their kids should go to public

educator or be publicly educated as well

right there are differences in what

people think between perspectives an

occupation does not make a perspective

so really really think about that and

look at how you've labeled your

perspectives also lenses are not

perspectives so just because you claim

that you're looking at the economic lens

that is a separate thing okay so what

are you actually looking at what are

people arguing or debating within the

economic lens what are their arguments

okay do not just call it a lens or

separated by two different lenses he's

argument okay the other part of row two

and four and this is really focused on

row four so establishing our

understanding will will happen with row

two but when we're talking about row

floor you have to have conversations

between perspectives as well so making

sure that if you look at these sentences

that are written here you see patient

homelessness increased crime rate prison

overflow if you read the sentence that

follows and this is just the first

sentence between the perspectives in

this students paper this sentence

actually ties to the last perspective so

that we can see how the perspectives are

connecting right so patient homelessness

caused by D institutionalization leads

to increased crimes rates so now I see

why the student talked about

homelessness and then crime rate and

then when I look at isolation and

suicide I see that patients who avoided

homelessness and imprisonment often felt

isolated so again this student is trying

to show a conversation okay then we have

what it looks like within the

perspectives between sources

additionally these authors support this

other authors claim right or these

authors complicate this other person's

claim you want sources just like you did

in the higher art where you made them

work for your own here you're just

showing how the sources compliment

extend or complicate each other's

thoughts okay you're putting the sources

in conversations the sources are

highlighted here there is no argument

that needs to be made it's just how the

sources are

acting the other part of these two rows

is looking at the composition of what's

included so within each perspective or

conversation do you have multiple

sources use is it clear why you're using

them

do you offer commentary to help us

understand what the source is arguing

and the source is key findings this is

mainly row two

do you offer an evaluation of the

relevance and credibility of the source

do you offer

a and if you use academic journals and

really good sources you don't have to do

really anything to establish the source

is relevant in credible because

especially use academic journal if you

said it's from a peer-reviewed academic

journal that's all you need to say we

got it um do you offer an evaluation of

relevance and credibility of the

argument or if the ideas right if they

have a small sample size or if this was

true in Maine is it true everywhere

right really acknowledging the

limitations of potentially the argument

and then did you use transitions or

transitional phrases to help those

sources speak to each other so if we go

into the students paper you'll notice in

the green what we have is we have those

sentences where they're telling us what

the perspective is patient homelessness

caused by the institutionalization

causes an increased crime rate

specifically as conducted by Smith's

it found these things we have his

evidence and then we have providing more

evidence we have this other source this

Wallis Mueller and Burgess who also

agree where they found the same thing so

any place that you say see the green the

student is trying to connect and that

commentary anywhere that you're seeing

the yellow is where sources included and

they're trying to put those sources in

conversation so again here's a great

place to pause and look at what a

successful conversation looks like among

sources within a sample paper all right

so let's get to the last rows and I know

I'm doing a lot in a short amount of

time so I apologize how fast I am going

but I want to make sure that we mr.

Gonzalez and I wanted to make sure not

only we got the submission and for you

but we wanted to make sure you felt good

about revising your IRR as well since

the bulk of our focus

then on the IWA so just some reminders

about conventions and citations rows 5 &

6 number 1 did you stay to the

word-count if you have 1700 words here

you need to narrow it down College Board

says 1200 they think you can do a really

good job in 1200 but again you have that

10% maps which is 13 20 is your writing

clear to understand did you clearly

communicate your ideas they feel

cohesive and focus that it's all aligned

with your question and one specific

narrow focus does the writing sound

academic and formal win read the number

one way you can tell Google without

Google sorry file find on your paper the

word you if you use the word you a lot

you have made this way to conversational

that is in formal and non-academic also

file fine your eyes do you have a lot of

eyes if you have eyes in the

introduction

that's too

like the eyes that if you're trying to

say this led me to my research question

and I am researching in the introduction

in establishing your context or for the

purposes of this paper I am defining

those kinds of things are always find in

the IRR in the IWA but if you are making

arguments where you say I don't think

this is credible because that's not the

formal way to say it and then you need

to adjust and delete this okay but if

you have a couple yous that's going to

push you down into that medium row so

make sure you get rid of this did you

proofread if you didn't make sure you do

excessive errors are going to score

poorly okay find a program that can read

it to you and you can listen for the

errors use those apps that we talked

about in Lesson nine that can be used

for revision have a friend look it over

have a parent read it have a grandparent

find somebody let them read it or listen

to it that will help you see how well

it's written and and then make sure you

check for proper formatting if your

citation style says to have headings and

subheadings make sure they are formatted

correctly

also make sure your end text and in-text

citations are correct and consistent

because we want to score highly on those

rows and we want to get all of the

points that we possibly can so what I

did here is I took three different and

student responses and I even color-coded

them to match the struggling as the read

the medium is the yellow and then the

high-performing is the green so if you

read that first one again just pause the

video and go through it but what you'll

notice is that the top sentence is

riddled with errors it's really hard to

say necessarily what the student is

trying to argue in the medium the

student is just overly wordy and

complicating his or her response by

being too wordy in putting that all

together and then the green is fluid and

solid and conversational without being

informal it's all about how clearly you

can communicate and like we talked about

in Lesson nine mr. Gonzalez and I some

of you just are trying to do too much

and you try to make it sound really

really pretty but you lose all um sight

of the actual clarity of what you're

trying to

they say it clearly but make sure that

it has some flow and it sounds formal in

red okay all right some final advice

we're finally to that point and the

chief readers report is another great

place to look as you go through but I

just want to highlight a couple things

of the high scoring versus the low

scoring remember the high scoring used

well vetted and credible sources

including peer-reviewed journals and

other academic sources so this is the

most important thing the strength of

your IRR and I can't understate this

okay like this is so significant the

strength of your IRR is based solely on

the quality of sources that you include

if you use bad sources you will not

score well that's how intertwined all of

these River grows are two sources okay

so make sure use really good sources so

that's rows 1 & 3 really talk about

sources make sure you're evaluating the

research and so that you're anchoring

commentary to the sources so you're not

just providing summary but that you're

actually going further make sure that

the topic is narrow enough in scope that

you demonstrated clear and comprehensive

understanding of the arguments presented

that's going to be rows 2 for you and

then Row 4 is where you're putting

sources in conversation but you want to

make sure too that you are putting

perspectives in conversations if you

have sections in your paper make sure

there's at least a sentence trying to

unite those sentences ok but again you

can pause this you can see these were

misconceptions and then this is the ones

who did a good job on this side okay so

remember our objectives for today were

to reflect and revise on our writing

thinking and creative processes to

really hopefully solidify how the IRR is

evaluated and to understand how to best

revise so if you take nothing else away

from today's second part of this lesson

I hope that you focus on how important

the quality of your sources are in the

grade that you will get for the IRR so

next steps make sure you take some time

to revise it and improve your IRR if

you've already submitted your IRR and

remember when you did it previously

thought it was 10% now it is 31 and a

half and it's one of two documents your

IRR and your IWA that make up your ap

score your teacher has the ability to

read to remove your submission so that

you can resubmit and please reach out to

your teacher if you want to do that or

wait for your teacher to give you more

information on what they're going to do

in terms of handling the revisions but

obviously now that there's more weight

giving it one more look over and is

probably in your best benefit as well

and hopefully what was presented in here

was just a refresher that either a I did

this really well and I feel really good

and I had a lot of changes or B I got a

lot of things to do and I need to fix

those as I go forward okay as always

make sure that you reach out to College

Board if you have any device or internet

access issues so they can help you and

on a final note since this is our last

video together on behalf of mr. Gonzales

and all of the people representing the

AP capstone and course seminar and

research because I feel like we're such

a good

partnership between us we just wants a

thing this is going to help you going

forward but most importantly good luck

through your writing and revision

process and take care of yourselves