you're not lazy...you're stuck in the freeze response

Simone Saunders
1 Oct 202310:02

Summary

TLDRIn this insightful video, licensed therapist Simone Saunders explores the concept of emotional regulation and nervous system dysregulation, specifically focusing on hypoarousal or the 'freeze response.' She likens the amygdala to a smoke detector, highlighting how it triggers automatic responses to perceived threats, sometimes leading to numbness or inaction. Using the 'Window of Tolerance' model, she explains how stress can push individuals into hyperarousal (fight/flight) or hypoarousal (freeze/fawn) states. Saunders emphasizes the importance of curiosity and awareness to identify triggers and suggests practical strategies like physical movement and sour candies to help regain balance. Her approach encourages a shame-free understanding of one's emotional state, aiming to widen the 'window of tolerance' for better emotional resilience.

Takeaways

  • 📺 The script discusses the concept of emotional regulation and nervous system dysregulation, particularly focusing on the 'freeze response' or hypoarousal.
  • 🧠 The amygdala is likened to a smoke detector in the brain, triggering automatic responses to perceived danger without distinguishing between real and imagined threats.
  • 🔍 When the amygdala is activated, the prefrontal cortex, responsible for logic and decision-making, is suppressed to allow for quick survival responses.
  • 🌡️ The 'Window of Tolerance' is introduced as a state of emotional regulation where one can handle life's challenges effectively with the prefrontal cortex engaged.
  • 🔴 The 'Red Zone' or hyperarousal represents emotionally activated states like fight or flight, leading to anxiety, panic, or anger.
  • 🔵 The 'Blue Zone' or hypoarousal is the opposite, characterized by the freeze and fawn responses, where one feels numb, dissociative, or lethargic.
  • 🚶‍♀️ The freeze response is compared to walking through mud, where despite wanting to move faster, one's progress is slowed due to the state of the nervous system.
  • 💡 The speaker suggests that experiences of hardship can shrink the window of tolerance, making it harder to handle emotional activation and discomfort.
  • 🔑 Awareness and understanding are key to widening the window of tolerance, allowing for more emotional activation without overwhelming the nervous system.
  • 🔎 Curiosity is encouraged as a shame-free way to understand what activates the nervous system's dysregulation, rather than using shame to try to 'fix' oneself.
  • 🏃‍♂️ Strategies for dealing with hypoarousal include physical movement, using sour candies to shock the system, and calling out one's own behaviors to gain awareness and initiate action.

Q & A

  • What is the main topic discussed in the video script?

    -The main topic discussed in the video script is the concept of emotional regulation and nervous system dysregulation, specifically focusing on the 'freeze response' or hypoarousal.

  • Who is Simone Saunders and what is her profession?

    -Simone Saunders is a licensed therapist and social worker based in Calgary, Alberta. She discusses lifestyle, mental health, and wellness in her videos.

  • What is the 'smoke detector' metaphor used to describe in the script?

    -The 'smoke detector' metaphor is used to describe the function of the amygdala in the brain, which acts as an emotional center that triggers automatic responses to perceived danger.

  • What happens when the amygdala is activated according to the script?

    -When the amygdala is activated, the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for logic and decision-making, turns off. This is because in moments of imminent danger, the body needs to make quick decisions without the need for logical thinking.

  • What are the three automatic responses mentioned in the script?

    -The three automatic responses mentioned are fight, flight, freeze, and fawn. These responses are triggered by the amygdala when it perceives danger.

  • What is the 'Window of Tolerance' in the context of the script?

    -The 'Window of Tolerance' refers to a state where a person is emotionally regulated, meaning they can handle life's challenges and stressors without their nervous system becoming dysregulated.

  • What does hypoarousal represent in the script?

    -Hypoarousal represents a state of low emotional activation, which includes the freeze and fawn responses. It is characterized by feelings of numbness, dissociation, lethargy, and unmotivation.

  • What is the suggested approach to understanding one's nervous system dysregulation?

    -The suggested approach is to use curiosity as a shame-free lens to gather information about what dysregulates the nervous system, without judgment or self-blame.

  • What are some strategies mentioned in the script to help with hypoarousal?

    -Some strategies mentioned include getting curious about one's daily life, experimenting with physical movement to increase activation, using sour candies to shock the nervous system into a present state, and calling out the freeze response when it occurs.

  • What is the ultimate goal of awareness and understanding in relation to the nervous system as discussed in the script?

    -The ultimate goal is to widen the 'Window of Tolerance' so that a person can experience more emotional activation and discomfort without their nervous system becoming completely dysregulated.

  • Why is it important to be aware of what activates the nervous system's freeze response?

    -It is important to be aware of what activates the freeze response to understand the environments and interactions that impact the nervous system, which can provide valuable information for managing and improving emotional regulation.

  • How does the script suggest using shame in relation to nervous system dysregulation?

    -The script suggests avoiding shame as it perpetuates the cycle of dysregulation. Instead, it encourages using curiosity to understand the nervous system's reactions without judgment.

Outlines

00:00

🛌 Understanding the Freeze Response

In this paragraph, Simone Saunders, a licensed therapist, introduces the concept of the 'freeze response' as part of the nervous system's reaction to stress. She compares the amygdala to a smoke detector, which triggers an automatic response regardless of whether the danger is real or perceived. The prefrontal cortex, responsible for logic and decision-making, is shut down during these moments to prioritize survival. Saunders explains the 'window of tolerance' as the state of emotional regulation, and how exceeding this window leads to either hyper arousal (fight or flight) or hypo arousal (freeze or fawn). She emphasizes the importance of being aware of what triggers these responses and suggests curiosity as a tool for understanding without judgment.

05:02

🔍 Strategies to Overcome Hypoarousal

The second paragraph delves into the specifics of hypoarousal, or the freeze response, and how it can manifest as numbness or lethargy. Saunders discusses the shrinkage of the 'window of tolerance' due to hardships, which reduces one's capacity to handle emotional activation. She encourages curiosity to identify triggers and suggests strategies to overcome hypoarousal, such as physical movement to increase activation and the use of sour candies to shock the nervous system back to a present state. Saunders also advises calling out the behavior when in a state of hypoarousal to gain awareness and potentially initiate action. The paragraph concludes with an invitation for viewers to engage with the content by leaving comments or questions.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Freeze Response

The freeze response, also known as hypoarousal, is a state of emotional numbness or being 'frozen', where an individual may feel lethargic, unmotivated, or unable to perform tasks. In the context of the video, the freeze response is likened to being stuck in mud, unable to move forward despite the desire to do so, as seen in behaviors like endlessly scrolling through videos or procrastinating on tasks like laundry.

💡Amygdala

The amygdala is an almond-shaped part of the brain involved in processing emotions and is often referred to as the 'emotion center'. In the video, it is metaphorically compared to a smoke detector, highlighting its role in triggering automatic responses to perceived threats, whether real or imagined, and its impact on the activation of the prefrontal cortex.

💡Prefrontal Cortex

The prefrontal cortex is the part of the brain responsible for higher cognitive functions such as decision-making, logical thinking, and understanding. In the script, it is mentioned that when the amygdala is activated, the prefrontal cortex turns off, leading to a lack of logical decision-making and an increase in automatic responses to perceived danger.

💡Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn

These terms describe the automatic responses that the body may exhibit when faced with danger. 'Fight' and 'flight' are more commonly known as hyperarousal responses, while 'freeze' and 'fawn' are hypoarousal responses. The video script discusses these responses in the context of nervous system dysregulation and how they can manifest in everyday life, such as procrastination or people-pleasing behaviors.

💡Window of Tolerance

The 'window of tolerance' is a concept in psychology that refers to the range of emotional or stressful experiences that an individual can tolerate before becoming dysregulated. The video explains that when outside this window, individuals may experience either hyperarousal or hypoarousal, and the goal is to widen this window to handle more emotional activation without becoming overwhelmed.

💡Nervous System Dysregulation

Nervous system dysregulation occurs when the nervous system is unable to respond appropriately to stressors, leading to either hyperarousal or hypoarousal. The video script discusses how this dysregulation can manifest in behaviors such as excessive phone use, procrastination, and difficulty in completing tasks, and how it can be addressed through awareness and understanding.

💡Curiosity

In the context of the video, curiosity is presented as a tool for gaining a shame-free understanding of one's own behaviors and responses. It encourages individuals to explore and gather information about what triggers their nervous system dysregulation without judgment, which can help in identifying patterns and working towards emotional regulation.

💡Shame

Shame is an emotion that can arise from feelings of inadequacy or failure to meet personal or societal standards. The video script warns against using shame as a tool for self-improvement, as it can perpetuate the cycle of nervous system dysregulation. Instead, it suggests curiosity as a healthier alternative for self-exploration and growth.

💡Activation

Activation in the context of the video refers to the level of engagement or arousal of the nervous system. Hypoarousal, or low activation, is associated with the freeze response, while hyperarousal, or high activation, is linked to fight or flight responses. The video suggests that understanding one's level of activation can help in finding strategies to regulate the nervous system, such as through physical movement or engaging in activities that increase awareness.

💡Doom Scrolling

Doom scrolling is a term used to describe the act of endlessly scrolling through negative or distressing content on social media or the internet. The video script uses this term to illustrate the hypoarousal state, where individuals may find themselves stuck in a loop of inactivity and emotional numbness, unable to break away from the screen despite a desire to do so.

💡Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the ability to recognize and understand one's own emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. In the video, self-awareness is highlighted as a crucial step towards emotional regulation and nervous system regulation. By becoming aware of when one is in a state of hypoarousal or hyperarousal, individuals can take action to bring themselves back to a state of emotional regulation, such as by engaging in physical activity or using techniques like sour candies to shock the system into the present moment.

Highlights

The video discusses the concept of 'freeze response' or hypoarousal, which is the opposite of the well-known emotional responses like panic attacks or anger outbursts.

The amygdala functions as the 'smoke detector' of the brain, triggering automatic responses to perceived threats regardless of their reality.

When the amygdala is activated, the prefrontal cortex, responsible for logic and decision-making, turns off to facilitate quick survival responses.

The 'Window of Tolerance' concept explains the state of emotional regulation where the prefrontal cortex is active, allowing individuals to handle life's challenges.

Outside the 'Window of Tolerance', the nervous system can trigger hyperarousal (fight or flight) or hypoarousal (freeze and fawn) responses.

Hypoarousal or the freeze response can manifest as feelings of numbness, lethargy, or unmotivation.

The freeze response is likened to walking through mud, where the individual is stuck and unable to move forward despite the desire to do so.

Experiencing hardships can shrink the 'Window of Tolerance', reducing the capacity to handle emotional activation and discomfort.

Curiosity is suggested as a shame-free approach to understanding what dysregulates the nervous system without judgment.

Experimenting with physical movement can help understand and potentially alleviate feelings of exhaustion related to nervous system dysregulation.

Sour candies can be used as a tool to shock the nervous system back to a present state and break out of unproductive behaviors like doom scrolling.

Acknowledging and naming the freeze response when it occurs can provide awareness and potentially enable action to overcome it.

The importance of understanding personal nervous system triggers to manage emotional dysregulation effectively is emphasized.

The video encourages viewers to widen their 'Window of Tolerance' to experience more emotional activation without overwhelming the nervous system.

Shame is identified as a counterproductive approach to self-improvement, as it can perpetuate the cycle of nervous system dysregulation.

The video provides practical advice on how to deal with the freeze response, including getting curious about one's triggers and experimenting with activation techniques.

Simone Saunders, a licensed therapist, uses the smoke detector metaphor to explain the amygdala's role in emotional responses and nervous system dysregulation.

The transcript is part of a series on lifestyle, mental health, and wellness by Simone Saunders, aimed at helping viewers understand and manage their emotional responses.

Transcripts

play00:00

I'm gonna get up after one more video

play00:05

oh what time is it

play00:09

you can't believe I wasted all that time

play00:11

what should I do today

play00:12

just one more video

play00:15

I really should get this laundry done

play00:18

damn it I've been sitting here for like

play00:19

an hour so maybe you've heard people say

play00:25

or you just don't want to do things or

play00:27

why do you spend 10 hours on your phone

play00:29

you want to watch Netflix for so long

play00:31

why don't you go to bed at a reasonable

play00:32

time why don't you do your laundry why

play00:34

don't you do X Y and Z you might have

play00:36

even had those feelings about yourself

play00:38

so if you're watching that earlier and

play00:40

you're like

play00:42

yeah ask me let's unpack the freeze

play00:45

response AKA hypo arousal welcome or

play00:48

welcome back friends if you're new here

play00:49

my name is Simone Saunders and I'm a

play00:50

licensed therapist and social worker in

play00:52

Calgary Alberta this page is all about

play00:54

lifestyle mental health and wellness

play00:55

don't forget to like comment subscribe

play00:57

and let's get into it whenever we think

play00:59

of emotionless regulation or nervous

play01:01

system dysregulation we always think of

play01:03

these big emotional responses we can

play01:06

panic attacks anger outbursts anxiety

play01:09

crying breakdowns what we don't think

play01:12

about is the opposite when you're just

play01:15

numb or you're Frozen let's all get on

play01:17

the same page and let's talk about the

play01:18

nervous system and the Brain the best

play01:20

metaphor that I like to use for the

play01:21

brain and the amygdala in specific is a

play01:23

smoke detector so our amygdala is kind

play01:26

of like our emotion Center up and the

play01:28

way that it functions is similar to a

play01:29

smoke detector so if you're gonna go

play01:30

make a snack you're gonna go make a

play01:32

grilled cheese and you burn the grilled

play01:34

cheese that smoke detector is going off

play01:36

if you burn your house down that smell

play01:38

detector is also going on that's similar

play01:40

to our amygdala in the sense that our

play01:42

Mandela doesn't really know the

play01:44

difference between real and perceived

play01:45

Danger so our amygdala is going to go

play01:48

off regardless and send us into an

play01:50

automatic response just in case that we

play01:52

can stay safe so what happens when our

play01:54

amygdala is turned on the smoke detector

play01:56

of our brain is our prefrontal cortex

play01:59

turns off our prefrontal cortex is our

play02:01

logic our understanding our ability to

play02:04

think things through it holds our coping

play02:07

tools allows us to essentially just make

play02:09

logical decisions and you're probably

play02:10

like okay that feels a little bit

play02:12

counter-intuitive why would your logical

play02:13

brain shut off the reason why is because

play02:15

it's actually counterproductive to

play02:17

pathological brain on in a moment of

play02:20

imminent danger so your body needs to

play02:22

make a split decision about okay how am

play02:25

I going to survive this situation rather

play02:27

than taking the time to logically think

play02:29

things for example if a bear were to

play02:31

come through this office right now and I

play02:34

were to be able to think okay

play02:36

can I fight this bear do I have enough

play02:38

stamina to outrun the bear

play02:41

I mean should I play dead would that be

play02:43

the best option I would be

play02:45

already so the way that the amygdala

play02:47

functions is actually really really

play02:48

important sometimes it causes us trouble

play02:50

because our smoke detector goes off when

play02:52

we're literally just making soup and

play02:53

it's a lot of steam there's no fire no

play02:56

burnt toast there's no burnt grilled

play02:57

cheese just a costume so the automatic

play03:00

responses that they make those sort of

play03:01

send us into is fight flight freeze and

play03:05

fawn so in order to explain these I like

play03:07

to use the window

play03:08

so the window of Tolerance in the middle

play03:10

is a state where we're not necessarily

play03:12

calm we're just emotionally regulated so

play03:15

that means that our prefrontal cortex is

play03:16

turned on and we can just deal with

play03:18

life's challenges so the stressors that

play03:19

come at us frustrations sadness life

play03:23

events big feelings we can handle those

play03:25

things and we can regulate ourselves we

play03:28

can ask for help we can logically think

play03:30

things through when we get outside of

play03:32

our window of Tolerance which is the red

play03:34

or the Blue Zone that's when we can't

play03:36

handle it and that's when that smoke

play03:37

detector is turned right on something

play03:39

important to note here is that you

play03:41

personally don't decide what you can or

play03:43

can't handle your nervous system decides

play03:45

that for you so if your nervous system

play03:46

decides I cannot handle having this

play03:48

tough conversation with my boss you will

play03:51

be in hyper arousal or hypo arousal

play03:53

hyper arousal the red zone is more

play03:55

consistent with your more emotionally

play03:57

activated States so your fight or flight

play04:00

response so that could look like anxiety

play04:02

or panic attacks addiction anger

play04:04

outbursts impulsivity whereas

play04:07

hypoarousal the Blue zone is kind of the

play04:09

opposite that's your freeze and fawn

play04:11

response Fawn is always a question I get

play04:13

asked and fawn is more so of the

play04:15

people-pleasing sort of acquiescing to

play04:17

whatever people want that's that

play04:19

response or the phrase response is sort

play04:21

of you're numbed out you might feel

play04:23

dissociative you might feel really

play04:25

really really tired or lethargic might

play04:28

feel unmotivated unable to do things

play04:30

that's the first response and that's

play04:31

where we're going to be spending a lot

play04:33

more time today a good way that I like

play04:34

to describe the freeze response is kind

play04:36

of like trying to walk through

play04:38

if you're trying to get to a checkpoint

play04:40

at the end maybe meters and meters away

play04:42

you can think to yourself okay I should

play04:45

be running faster I should be walking

play04:47

faster I should be taking bigger steps

play04:50

in order to get to the destination

play04:51

consistency of the mud doesn't really

play04:53

allow for you to go any faster than you

play04:55

currently are so if you think about when

play04:57

you're doing scrolling I as well as many

play05:00

others have had the thoughts of okay

play05:01

just two more videos just one more video

play05:04

I need to go to bed

play05:06

et cetera et cetera Etc but when it

play05:08

comes to actually doing that putting the

play05:10

phone away that's when it becomes

play05:12

difficult because we're stuck in the mud

play05:14

so your nervous system is just as much

play05:16

dysregulated in the freeze response as

play05:18

in the fight or flight response so what

play05:20

happens when we've been through a lot of

play05:22

hardship things that are really

play05:23

difficult for us is our window of

play05:25

Tolerance shrinks and what that means is

play05:27

our ability to handle different levels

play05:30

of discomfort different levels of

play05:32

emotional activation becomes really

play05:35

small and so things that feel small

play05:38

might bring us out of our window so the

play05:41

meeting with your boss that might feel

play05:42

small to someone else but that maybe

play05:44

brings you out of your window because

play05:46

you perhaps have a smaller window of

play05:47

Tolerance and maybe that's because of

play05:48

the experiences that you've gone through

play05:50

the goal of awareness and understanding

play05:51

is widening that window so that you can

play05:54

experience a little bit more emotional

play05:56

activation a little bit more discomfort

play05:57

without your nervous system feeling

play05:59

completely

play06:00

something I've noticed a lot in my work

play06:02

with people is that we're really unaware

play06:04

of the things that activate that in

play06:06

ourselves so we might feel like oh this

play06:08

just happens all the time this is just

play06:09

my every night and it's important for us

play06:12

to get curious about okay what happens

play06:13

every night to where my nervous system

play06:15

is

play06:18

it's not safe to just be with myself

play06:19

when we start to kind of get curious

play06:21

about the environments that we're in the

play06:23

people that we talk to and how that

play06:25

impacts our nervous system it can give

play06:27

us a lot of information about what

play06:29

dysregulates us and I think a lot of

play06:31

times we try and use a framework of

play06:34

shame in order to sort of fix ourselves

play06:37

so why don't you do X Y and Z why are

play06:41

you so lazy why don't you have enough

play06:43

motivation why don't you have enough

play06:45

determination you should be farther in

play06:47

life Etc et cetera et cetera but the

play06:49

thing about shame is that it kind of

play06:51

perpetuates the cycle that's currently

play06:53

happening already it might change things

play06:55

for a little bit but eventually your

play06:58

nervous system is really tired of just

play07:00

being very overactive and goes back to

play07:02

the freeze response and so I use the

play07:04

word curiosity intentionally because

play07:06

Curiosity has sort of a shame-free lens

play07:09

it allows us to understand what's

play07:11

happening with the sole intent of just

play07:13

gathering information

play07:14

so if X Y and Z is something that is

play07:17

really impactful for your nervous system

play07:19

whether or not it feels silly stupid

play07:22

objectively small whatever the case none

play07:25

of that really matters it's

play07:27

generation that we're looking for so

play07:29

what can I do to widen my window of

play07:30

Tolerance how can I get to a space where

play07:32

I am not just Doom scrolling all the

play07:35

time where I'm not on Netflix all the

play07:37

time or I'm not sitting in my room just

play07:39

daydreaming all of the time number one

play07:42

is to get curious get curious about

play07:43

what's happening in your day-to-day life

play07:44

when do you feel the most numb what do

play07:46

you feel the most Frozen when do you

play07:47

feel the most called to engage in these

play07:50

behaviors like Doom scrolling like

play07:53

Netflix like sitting there and

play07:56

daydreaming number two is that with

play07:57

hypoarousal the Blue Zone the freeze

play08:00

response in order to get out of that

play08:02

zone we need more activation whereas the

play08:05

Red Zone hyper arousal we need less

play08:08

activation so if you notice that you a

play08:11

big wave of exhaustion comes over you it

play08:14

could be that your body is physically

play08:15

tired and maybe you just need some sleep

play08:17

it could all cut also your nervous

play08:19

system feeling really dysregulated so I

play08:22

always encourage experiment with going

play08:23

for a walk going and doing something

play08:26

physical whether that's just stretching

play08:29

moving your body in some capacity and

play08:31

see what

play08:33

see what you might find that you feel

play08:34

the exact same afterwards you might find

play08:36

that the exhaustion Has Lifted and so

play08:38

experimenting with these things can help

play08:40

you understand okay if my exhaustion is

play08:42

lifted as a result of body movement as a

play08:45

result of more activation then the

play08:48

probability of your nervous system being

play08:50

dysregulated during that moment where

play08:51

you're feeling really lethargic and

play08:53

tired is fairly High other things that

play08:55

can be helpful outside of movement is I

play08:57

always recommend having sour candies on

play08:59

hand now this will kind of shock your

play09:01

nervous system to being in a present

play09:03

state so if you're scrolling on social

play09:06

media you're Doom scrolling and it's

play09:07

really difficult for you to get out of

play09:09

that state keep a pack of sour candies

play09:11

by your bedside pop one of those things

play09:13

in and it will give you a bit of a jolt

play09:16

of awareness of your entire body and

play09:18

what's happening and that might give you

play09:20

the ability to close that Gap put down

play09:22

your phone and do whatever it is that

play09:24

you've been trying to do for the past

play09:25

the last suggestion other than getting

play09:27

to the root root causing that

play09:28

dysregulation is calling it out when you

play09:31

are doom scrolling when you are sitting

play09:33

there daydreaming and you're able to say

play09:35

okay right now my body's in the freeze

play09:38

response right now I'm in hypo arousal

play09:40

that in itself can allow your body to

play09:43

gain the awareness of oh I actually

play09:44

don't feel safe right now and in

play09:47

understanding that and being aware of

play09:48

that it sometimes gives you the ability

play09:50

to initiate action if you have any

play09:51

questions comments or thoughts feel free

play09:53

to leave them down below don't forget to

play09:54

like comment and subscribe and will see

play09:56

you guys in the next video

Rate This

5.0 / 5 (0 votes)

Related Tags
Emotional RegulationTherapy InsightsNervous SystemSelf-AwarenessStress ManagementFight or FlightMental HealthLifestyle TipsSocial WorkCalgary AlbertaMindfulness