If you TREAT HER WELL she thinks you are beneath her WHEN DATING! (female nature 101 in session)

Casey Zander
9 May 202411:54

Summary

TLDRThe video script discusses the dynamics of respect and attraction in relationships, particularly with women. It emphasizes that women often respect what they have to earn, suggesting that being too readily available can be perceived as low value. The speaker argues that scarcity creates value and that women are attracted to a challenge, desiring to 'win over' their partners. The script also touches on the concept of hypergamy, where women may feel their sexual market value is higher than their current partner's, leading them to seek better options. It advises men to reveal themselves slowly to maintain intrigue and suggests that relationships should not be based solely on positive emotions, but also include a balance of experiences, like a movie plot. The analogy of natural selection and adaptation is used to encourage personal growth and adaptability, which are seen as attractive traits for survival and replication. The video aims to provide insights on how to maintain authenticity and depth in a relationship, rather than simply treating people poorly.

Takeaways

  • 🚫 **Don't Treat People Poorly**: The video emphasizes the importance of treating others with respect, not poorly.
  • 🀝 **Earned Respect**: Women often show respect and admiration to those who have earned it, implying that being too available can be perceived as low value.
  • πŸš€ **Scarcity Creates Value**: Being scarce or not too easily attainable can increase one's perceived value in a relationship.
  • πŸ† **Challenge Desired**: Women are often attracted to a challenge and want to 'win over' their partner, which can increase their interest and commitment.
  • 🚫 **Avoid Being 'Too Easy'**: If a woman feels she can have you too easily, it can lead to a decrease in her respect for you and a questioning of your value.
  • 🎭 **Multi-Dimensional Appeal**: Women are attracted to men who are multi-dimensional, bringing different emotional aspects to the table, not just physical attributes.
  • πŸ“ˆ **Hypergamy and Optimizing Choices**: The concept of hypergamy suggests that women may always be looking to optimize their choice of partner, which can lead to seeking a better option if they feel they can do better.
  • πŸŽ₯ **Life as a Story**: Women often view relationships as a story, with a plot, mystery, and intrigue, rather than just physical intimacy.
  • πŸ” **Slow Reveal**: It's beneficial to reveal yourself slowly to maintain a woman's interest and to keep her engaged in 'figuring you out'.
  • 🎒 **Emotional Roller Coaster**: Relationships should have a balance of emotions, similar to a movie's plot, to keep things interesting and engaging.
  • 🌱 **Adapt and Evolve**: Just as animals adapt to their environment, men should adapt to the circumstances of dating and relationships to increase their chances of success.

Q & A

  • What does the title of the video suggest about how women perceive men who treat them well?

    -The title suggests that if a man treats a woman exceptionally well without her having to earn his respect and admiration, she might perceive him as being beneath her, which can lead to a lack of respect and attraction.

  • Why does being easily attainable or accessible make a person seem low value in the context of dating?

    -Being easily attainable or accessible can signal to the other person that the individual is not bringing much to the table, which can lead to a perception of low value. This is because the effort and challenge that comes with 'earning' someone's attention and affection are often seen as indicators of higher value.

  • What is the concept of 'hypergamy' in the context of the video?

    -Hypergamy refers to the tendency to seek a better option or a higher status mate. In the context of the video, it is suggested that women may not feel satisfied with their current partner if they feel their sexual market value is higher, leading them to seek a better option.

  • How does scarcity create value in relationships?

    -Scarcity creates value by making something seem more desirable and valuable because it is less available. In relationships, if a person is not readily available or does not give their time and attention easily, they are perceived as more valuable and attractive.

  • What is the importance of a man understanding his worth in a relationship?

    -Understanding his worth allows a man to ensure that others in his life, including his romantic partner, have to earn his time and attention. This can lead to a more balanced and respectful dynamic in the relationship.

  • Why does the video suggest that women are attracted to men who make them work to win them over?

    -The video suggests that the effort and challenge involved in winning someone over can increase their perceived value and attractiveness. It aligns with the concept that women often want what they can't have and are attracted to a challenge.

  • How does the video relate the idea of a woman's love being 'story-based' to the concept of hypergamy?

    -The video suggests that women's love is not solely based on intimacy and sex but rather on the story, plot, mystery, and intrigue of getting to know an individual. This story-based approach can fuel hypergamy, as it creates a desire to 'solve' the individual and find out more about them.

  • What role does emotional complexity play in maintaining a woman's interest in a man?

    -Emotional complexity is crucial in maintaining a woman's interest because it provides depth and variety, preventing boredom and keeping the relationship dynamic and engaging. A one-dimensional emotional approach can lead to a lack of sustained interest.

  • Why is it beneficial to reveal oneself slowly in a relationship?

    -Revealing oneself slowly can create a sense of mystery and intrigue, encouraging the other person to invest time and effort in getting to know the individual better. This can enhance the perceived value of the person and maintain interest over time.

  • How does the video compare the dynamics of a movie to those of a relationship?

    -The video compares a movie's plot, tension, uncertainty, and emotional roller coaster to a relationship, suggesting that similar dynamics of excitement, challenge, and unpredictability can make a relationship more engaging and attractive.

  • What is the significance of environmental adaptation in the context of dating and relationships?

    -Environmental adaptation is significant as it relates to the ability to adjust and respond to changes in one's social environment, including dating dynamics. Adapting to these changes can increase one's attractiveness and success in relationships, as it demonstrates resilience and adaptability, which are desirable traits.

Outlines

00:00

🚫 Respecting Women and Not Being Undervalued

The first paragraph emphasizes the importance of not treating women poorly but rather understanding the dynamics of respect in a relationship. It suggests that women often show respect and admiration to those who have earned it. The speaker explains that being too readily available or accommodating can lead to being perceived as low value, which can result in disrespect and a lack of attraction. The key is to present oneself in an authentic way that doesn't seem like a facade, and to understand that scarcity can create value, which is important in maintaining a woman's interest.

05:01

πŸ’­ The Intrigue of Earning a Woman's Interest

The second paragraph delves into the concept that women are attracted to what they can't easily have, which is linked to the idea of hypergamy. It discusses how women's perceptions of love are often story-based, focusing on the journey of getting to know someone rather than just the physical aspects of a relationship. The speaker advises revealing oneself slowly to maintain a sense of mystery and challenge. It also touches on the importance of balance in emotions, comparing the dynamics of a relationship to the plot of a movie, which includes a mix of tension, uncertainty, and a variety of emotional experiences.

10:01

🌿 Adapting to the Environment for Successful Dating

The third paragraph discusses the principles of natural selection and how they can be applied to dating. It stresses the importance of adapting to one's environment, which in the context of dating could mean adjusting one's online presence or approach to relationships. The speaker suggests that showing adaptability is a sign of being a good 'bet for survival,' which is attractive to women. It also highlights the importance of survival value in a partner, meaning that a woman needs to feel that she has earned the man's respect and that he brings a lot to the table in terms of a potential long-term relationship.

Mindmap

Keywords

πŸ’‘Respect

Respect in the context of the video refers to the admiration and regard that one person has for another. It is a core component in relationships, and the video suggests that women often show respect and admiration for those who have earned it. An example from the script is when it is mentioned that if a woman doesn't have to earn a man's attention or resources, she may not respect him as much.

πŸ’‘Authenticity

Authenticity is the state of being genuine and not pretending to be something one is not. The video emphasizes the importance of being authentic when trying to earn someone's respect, rather than putting on a front. It is tied to the video's theme as it suggests that women are attracted to men who are true to themselves and do not act in a way that is not natural to them.

πŸ’‘Hypergamy

Hypergamy is the social practice where an individual seeks a partner of higher social status. The video discusses how women may feel the urge to 'optimize' their hypergamy by seeking a partner who appears to be of higher value. It is used to explain why women might feel the need to pursue someone who seems to be a 'better option'.

πŸ’‘Sexual Market Value (SMV)

Sexual Market Value refers to the perceived desirability of an individual in the context of dating and relationships. The video suggests that women may question their partner's SMV if they feel they can have them easily, which can lead to a loss of attraction. It is a central concept in the video's discussion on relationship dynamics.

πŸ’‘Scarcity

Scarcity is the state of being scarce or not readily available. The video uses the concept of scarcity to explain how value is perceived. It suggests that when something is scarce, it is seen as more valuable, which applies to relationships as well. An example from the script is the analogy of a sports car being more desirable because there are only a few made.

πŸ’‘Challenge

A challenge in the context of the video refers to the effort or difficulty one must overcome to win someone's affection or attention. The video posits that women are attracted to a challenge and want to 'win over' a partner. It is a key element in the discussion of how to maintain interest and respect in a relationship.

πŸ’‘Intrigue

Intrigue is a feeling of curiosity and interest, particularly about something mysterious or not fully understood. The video suggests that women are attracted to men who are intriguing and multi-dimensional, as it provides a sense of mystery and depth. It is used to explain why women may be more interested in a man's personality and the 'story' of who he is rather than superficial attributes.

πŸ’‘Adaptation

Adaptation is the process of adjusting to new conditions or the environment. The video uses the concept of adaptation to discuss how individuals must adjust their behaviors and presentations in the context of dating and relationships. It is related to the video's theme by suggesting that those who adapt are more likely to succeed in finding a partner.

πŸ’‘Environmental Adaptation

Environmental Adaptation refers to the process of adjusting to one's surroundings or context. In the video, it is used to draw parallels between the animal kingdom's natural selection and the social dynamics of dating. It is suggested that adapting to one's 'environment', such as the dating scene, can increase one's chances of finding a partner.

πŸ’‘Replication

Replication in the video's context refers to the biological drive to reproduce and ensure the continuation of one's genetic lineage. It is tied to the importance of finding a suitable partner for a long-term relationship or for potential future offspring. The video suggests that replication is a fundamental human drive that influences relationship choices.

πŸ’‘Survival Value

Survival Value is the concept of an individual's ability to survive and thrive in their environment. The video discusses how a person's perceived survival value can impact their attractiveness in the dating scene. It is used to explain why women may seek partners who demonstrate traits that suggest they can provide for and protect them.

Highlights

Women often show respect and admiration to those who have earned it, implying that being too easily available can be perceived as low value.

Being overly accommodating can lead to a woman disrespecting you and losing interest, as she feels she didn't have to earn your attention.

The concept that women only want what they can't have is linked to hypergamy, where they seek to optimize their choices.

Attraction is not solely based on physical traits; it's often about a man understanding his worth and making others earn his company.

Scarcity creates value, and this principle applies to relationships, where a challenge is often more appealing than easy availability.

Women are attracted to a sense of mystery and the process of figuring out an individual, which is likened to the plot of a story.

It's important to reveal yourself slowly to maintain a woman's interest, as immediate accessibility can lead to questioning your value.

Balance in relationships is key; providing only positive emotions can lead to boredom.

Relationships should have a dynamic similar to a movie, with a plot, tension, and a mix of emotions to keep the interest alive.

Adapting to one's environment is crucial for success in dating, as it was in the animal kingdom for survival.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of not treating people poorly while still maintaining an air of challenge and desirability.

Women are often attracted to problematic men because it presents a problem for them to solve, which can be appealing.

Small problems in a relationship can accumulate and become a significant driving force for a woman's interest.

The complexity and depth of a person are attractive, as it provides more for a potential partner to discover and appreciate.

Survival and replication are two fundamental aspects of life, and bringing value to a relationship aids in successful replication.

The video encourages viewers to adapt to their social environment, just as animals adapt to theirs for survival and mating.

The speaker provides a gift for viewers to deepen their understanding and improve their dating strategies.

Transcripts

play00:00

now I titled today's video if you treat

play00:02

her well she thinks that you are beneath

play00:04

her now I also put together a gift for

play00:06

you so check out the gift after today's

play00:08

video is over but here's what you have

play00:09

to know about this title this does not

play00:12

mean go treat anybody poorly this does

play00:15

not mean go treat people like [Β __Β ] okay

play00:19

what this means is in a relationship or

play00:21

when you're

play00:22

dating women often times only will show

play00:25

respect and admiration to what they have

play00:27

to earn so I'm going to be breaking this

play00:29

down for you and I'm going to be showing

play00:30

you exactly how you can do this in an

play00:32

authentic way without her pulling away

play00:35

or making it seem like you're putting on

play00:36

a front so let's dive in so number one

play00:39

women only respect what they have to

play00:41

earn and this is why often times if you

play00:43

treat her super well she thinks that you

play00:45

are beneath her so when I say women only

play00:48

respect what they have to earn let's

play00:49

look at exactly what I mean if you are

play00:51

easily attainable okay or you're easily

play00:55

accessible if you are super

play00:57

accommodating if dates resources and

play01:00

time for her and towards her is always

play01:03

readily in abundance a few red flags go

play01:07

off in her head okay and don't blame me

play01:11

for this don't even blame the women for

play01:13

this that you're dating it's just mother

play01:16

nature and the way that the world works

play01:18

so number one here's what happens if

play01:19

you're readily available and you are

play01:21

just giving resources and time and

play01:23

attention instantly she thinks that

play01:25

you're low value which means she thinks

play01:28

that you're not bringing a lot to the

play01:29

table which is why you have to try so

play01:31

hard number two she starts to disrespect

play01:34

you and she loses respect for you

play01:36

because she didn't have to earn anything

play01:39

number three she thinks that you are one

play01:41

over way too easy okay and then number

play01:44

four she feels that her sexual market

play01:46

value is above yours so when you do

play01:48

these things she instantly just goes I

play01:50

can probably do better and then

play01:53

hypergamy is not satisfied and now she's

play01:54

trying to optimize that hypergamy and

play01:56

now she's going to try to find a better

play01:58

option here's what I can tell you

play02:00

majority of the things that you think

play02:02

women are attracted to don't make a [Β __Β ]

play02:04

of difference so in your brain you go oh

play02:07

she's going to go find a guy who's

play02:08

taller oh she's going to go find a guy

play02:10

who has more muscle oh she's going to go

play02:12

find a guy who's more masculine often

play02:15

times that's false often

play02:18

times it's a guy who

play02:20

just understands his worth and will

play02:22

often times make it so that way anybody

play02:25

in his life has to actually earn him so

play02:27

it's very rarely ever the guy that you

play02:29

think it is in your brain you start to

play02:32

picture some super masculine strong dude

play02:35

and a lot of times it's not that at all

play02:37

right it's a guy that she fell in love

play02:39

with with his personality it's a guy

play02:41

who's multi-dimensional it's a guy who

play02:43

brings different things to the table on

play02:45

an emotional level that makes her feel a

play02:47

certain type of way it's a

play02:48

feeling sometimes the guy could be worse

play02:51

looking than you sometimes the guy could

play02:52

be in worse shape than you sometimes the

play02:54

guy could even make less money than you

play02:56

those attraction triggers only do so

play02:58

much at the at the end of the day the

play03:00

woman dates the person the woman dates

play03:02

the individual so she feels that her

play03:04

sexual market value is above yours now

play03:07

here's what you got to know and what you

play03:08

got to understand scarcity creates value

play03:12

in all way shapes and forms anything

play03:13

that is scarce a scarce resource

play03:16

automatically is assumed to be higher

play03:17

value scarcity creates value okay if I

play03:23

have a sports car and there's only five

play03:25

of them made in the whole world it's in

play03:28

scarce Supply demand goes up scarcity

play03:31

creates value so here's what I can tell

play03:33

you she wants a challenge and on top of

play03:36

that she wants to have to win you over

play03:38

and because she wants to have to win you

play03:40

over she wants to put in some effort

play03:42

when she has to put in effort she

play03:43

automatically thinks you are now worth

play03:45

her time so shifting this to number two

play03:48

women only want what they can't have and

play03:51

this isn't bad this just stems into

play03:53

hypergamy so she's in a relationship

play03:56

like this is one of my favorite quotes

play03:58

this is my favorite quote that either I

play04:02

have heard some type of version of this

play04:05

from somebody in the past or maybe this

play04:07

is even something that I think and that

play04:09

I almost in a way came up with I'm not

play04:12

sure but something along these lines I

play04:15

think is funny she's in a relationship

play04:17

with every guy that she follows on

play04:19

social media except the one she's

play04:22

actually dating that's her boyfriend say

play04:24

that with me one more time she's in a

play04:25

relationship with every single guy that

play04:27

she follows on social media except the

play04:29

the one that she's actually dating

play04:31

that's her boyfriend so what does that

play04:33

mean that means women's love and women's

play04:36

entire idea of love and women's entire

play04:39

idea of

play04:40

fantasy is not based on intimacy and sex

play04:44

in fact it's not based on intimacy and

play04:45

sex at all their love is story based so

play04:49

it's based on

play04:51

story

play04:52

plot mystery

play04:54

Intrigue and figuring you out Page by

play04:57

page that's so important to them

play05:00

they are not thinking of dating and they

play05:04

are not thinking of love in the way that

play05:07

you do you often times think of

play05:10

it in a form of intimacy and in a form

play05:12

of you know you guys maybe sleeping

play05:14

together or you guys doing something

play05:16

like that she is thinking of it as who

play05:19

is this individual and can I figure him

play05:20

out that is how a woman's entire often

play05:24

times like dating habits will end up

play05:27

playing out so it's based on story L

play05:29

mystery and Intrigue and figuring you

play05:31

out Page by Page this is why it's always

play05:33

best to reveal yourself slowly so if she

play05:36

can have you she questions your sexual

play05:39

market value and why she was chosen for

play05:41

the girlfriend position so think about

play05:43

that for a second if she can have you

play05:46

she questions your sexual market value

play05:48

and why she was chosen for the

play05:50

girlfriend position so a lot of times

play05:53

women just like the idea that they want

play05:55

you and that's enough for them to keep

play05:58

being in love whether they have you or

play05:59

not not often times it's even better if

play06:01

they don't have you it keeps fueling

play06:03

that drive or that fire to be in a slow

play06:07

Pursuit okay so here's what I can tell

play06:10

you things need balance this whole video

play06:14

is not about treating people poorly okay

play06:16

do not treat people poorly but if the

play06:18

only emotion you give is a positive

play06:20

emotion things get boring for her very

play06:22

quick so let's look at all the things

play06:24

that a movie has okay a movie has

play06:27

plot things happens step by step okay a

play06:31

movie also has tension there's typically

play06:33

a villain and there's typically a hero

play06:35

there's typically some other characters

play06:38

and they fit into the mix in some way

play06:39

shape or form on top of that the hero

play06:42

and the villain both typically has

play06:44

friends so there's tension okay there's

play06:47

people at some points in the movie

play06:49

there's happiness but then often times

play06:51

the hero is faced with a big problem

play06:53

okay so a big problem that the character

play06:55

has to solve if she feels like she is

play06:57

the main character of her own movie of

play06:59

her own story this is why I've said in

play07:01

the past that women often times

play07:03

gravitate towards problematic men

play07:05

because now she has something that she

play07:06

wants to actually solve this problem

play07:08

doesn't have to be completely drastic

play07:12

this problem could be as something as

play07:14

simple as he takes 24 hours to reply to

play07:17

me and I don't know why and now she

play07:19

wants to figure out what's going on with

play07:21

you the little problems can add up into

play07:23

one big problem that she wants to solve

play07:25

so keep that in mind a movie also has

play07:28

uncertainty when you watch it you don't

play07:30

know if the hero is going to succeed and

play07:32

sometimes in the end of that movie The

play07:34

Hero does not succeed and the funniest

play07:36

part about that is then they make a

play07:37

second movie or they write a second book

play07:40

on it and then they get all of the

play07:41

masses to watch the next episode okay

play07:44

and on top of that um

play07:47

the hero will sometimes find

play07:50

success and then the problem solved so

play07:53

what what I'm looking at here is a

play07:55

roller coaster you are looking at a

play07:56

roller coaster of emotions that a movie

play07:58

will bring that a story will bring this

play08:00

is important she wants to feel different

play08:04

things and even look at this on a level

play08:08

that is masculine if the only thing

play08:10

you're bringing

play08:12

24/7 is just you know a masculine

play08:15

demeanor a masculine attitude and you're

play08:17

constantly in that

play08:20

Dimension if she sees that that's all

play08:22

there is to you it's going to be very

play08:25

hard for her to date that guy Beyond

play08:29

something that lasted for a few weeks or

play08:31

a few months it's going to be very very

play08:34

hard because she needs to see that

play08:37

there's more complexity there's more

play08:38

depth okay a good way that you can kind

play08:41

of wrap your whole brain or your whole

play08:42

mind around this is you have to

play08:44

understand how people evolve and

play08:46

adapting to circumstances and

play08:48

environment this is very important so a

play08:51

thousand years ago or throughout you

play08:53

know like I'm not like a scientist I'm

play08:56

not a person who's very smart on books

play08:58

or bi ology or whatever but we've all

play09:01

heard things like this you hear things

play09:02

like animals have had to adapt over

play09:05

hundreds or thousands of years to their

play09:07

environment so over a thousand years

play09:09

animals have to adapt this is something

play09:11

that like people kind of like know or

play09:13

people hear okay so I'm going to relate

play09:17

that to dating guys today will often say

play09:19

things like you know I don't like how

play09:21

things are today I don't want to have to

play09:23

change I don't like to adapt to the

play09:26

circumstances of my environment

play09:29

sometimes that circumstance can be um

play09:32

dating profiles sometimes it can be how

play09:34

you present yourself online to the

play09:37

world but that's your environment and

play09:39

guys will say I don't like how that is I

play09:41

don't like how things are today well

play09:43

here's what I can tell you if you live

play09:44

by the attitude of who cares I just have

play09:46

to adapt regardless you're going to get

play09:48

more success because if you kind of look

play09:50

at what happens in like the animal

play09:51

kingdom and like I said I'm not some you

play09:53

know uh biology major or whatever but

play09:57

I've heard these terms over the years

play09:59

I've things like animals have to go

play10:01

through a process when mating called

play10:03

natural selection so number one natural

play10:05

selection animals look at survival of

play10:08

the fittest another third thing animals

play10:11

look at environmental

play10:13

adaptation the same rules in some way

play10:15

shape or form will apply to you you're

play10:18

going to have to look at environmental

play10:20

adaptation and adapt and the ones who

play10:22

adapt to their environment women will

play10:24

see that that is a good bet for survival

play10:26

so you have to take account for

play10:28

everything you have have to look at

play10:29

everything you have to look at the whole

play10:31

picture because what you have to

play10:32

remember is two of the most important

play10:34

things in your life will be these two

play10:39

survival living day-to-day and being

play10:41

healthy and

play10:42

replication making sure you

play10:46

have a good dating companion a good

play10:49

girlfriend whatever the case may be

play10:50

survival and replication those are two

play10:52

of the most important things in order to

play10:54

gain some sort of replication let's say

play10:57

if you were to have kids one day you

play10:58

have to bring survival value to the

play11:00

table that means she needs to feel a lot

play11:03

of different things and she needs to

play11:05

make sure that she can win you over so

play11:06

she respects you so if the only thing

play11:09

you do is treat her super well she

play11:10

thinks that you are beneath her and on

play11:12

top of that she starts to think that she

play11:13

can do better if you like this video I

play11:15

want you to hit the like button comment

play11:17

and subscribe check out the gift that I

play11:18

made for you below I promise you that

play11:20

you're going to love it I promise you

play11:22

that I put a lot into it and I made this

play11:24

so that way you actually have

play11:26

better processes knowledge information

play11:30

at a deeper level than you did not have

play11:32

before we'll see you in the next one

Rate This
β˜…
β˜…
β˜…
β˜…
β˜…

5.0 / 5 (0 votes)

Related Tags
Dating DynamicsRelationship RespectAuthenticity in LoveHypergamySexual Market ValueEmotional BalanceIntimate RelationshipsAttraction TriggersPersonal WorthScarcity ValueChallenge in DatingLove StorytellingEmotional Roller CoasterAdaptation in DatingSurvival and Replication