STOP trying to CREATE attraction with WOMEN (she either likes you or she doesn't)

Casey Zander
12 Nov 202412:29

Summary

TLDRIn this video, the speaker emphasizes that attraction is not something men can create through words or actions; it is a natural occurrence determined by who you are. He argues that women no longer need men for resources or security, but for attraction. The key to increasing one's appeal lies in self-improvement, discipline, and developing a strong personal presence. Rather than trying to manipulate attraction, men should focus on enhancing their physical, mental, and social qualities to become the best version of themselves. This will naturally lead to more successful relationships.

Takeaways

  • 😀 Attraction is not something you can create through words or actions—it's about your overall being and presence.
  • 😀 You either are or you aren't attractive to someone. Attraction cannot be manipulated by trying to change someone's mind.
  • 😀 Women today optimize for what's missing, not for traditional roles—meaning they seek attractive men rather than relying on men for security or resources.
  • 😀 Attraction is about who you are as a person, including your looks, hygiene, vocal tone, and overall aura.
  • 😀 Men often mistake attraction for something that can be won over with words, but attraction is instinctive and not influenced by verbal persuasion.
  • 😀 Self-improvement is key—spending time on yourself and your own development will make you more attractive to women.
  • 😀 Trying to create attraction through talking or behavior is often a form of coping, stemming from a lack of discipline in self-improvement.
  • 😀 Men need to compete, contend, and improve themselves to truly become desirable in the dating market.
  • 😀 Women today value independence, meaning they don't need men for traditional security or resources, but they still seek attraction.
  • 😀 A disciplined man who works on his self-improvement is more likely to command respect and attract women naturally.
  • 😀 There is no such thing as a truly 'traditional woman' in the modern context, as the dating dynamics have changed significantly with modern technology and social media.

Q & A

  • What does the speaker mean by 'you either are or you aren't' in relation to attraction?

    -The speaker emphasizes that attraction is not something that can be created or manipulated. Either someone is attracted to you based on inherent qualities, or they aren't. It's a natural process that can't be forced through words or actions.

  • Why do men mistakenly believe they can talk their way into attraction?

    -Many men believe that by speaking or acting a certain way, they can convince a woman to find them attractive. The speaker argues that this is a misconception, as attraction is based on inherent qualities, not on what is said.

  • What role does 'Mother Nature' or 'the universe' play in attraction?

    -The speaker suggests that attraction is managed by natural forces (Mother Nature, the universe, or God), meaning it happens organically. It is not something that can be controlled or created through specific actions or words.

  • What does the speaker mean by saying 'you either are attractive or you are not'?

    -Attraction, according to the speaker, is not negotiable. A person either has qualities that make them attractive to others or they don't, based on their appearance, behavior, and overall presence.

  • What factors contribute to someone's overall attractiveness, according to the script?

    -The speaker lists factors such as physical appearance, height, hygiene, vocal tone, and overall aesthetics as contributing to one's attractiveness. These are seen as inherent traits that make a person appealing.

  • How does the speaker view the concept of 'traditional values' in modern relationships?

    -The speaker challenges the idea of 'traditional values' in women, arguing that the environment has changed. While women might have once sought security and resources from men, today many are independent and optimize for attraction, not financial dependency.

  • What is 'hypergamy' and how does it relate to the speaker's argument?

    -Hypergamy refers to women seeking partners who are seen as 'better' or more attractive. The speaker suggests that in modern times, women are optimizing for physical attraction rather than security or resources, as they are often financially independent.

  • Why does the speaker encourage men to focus on self-improvement?

    -The speaker believes that men should focus on improving themselves—physically, mentally, and emotionally—to become the best version of themselves. This self-improvement naturally leads to greater attractiveness, which makes them more appealing to women.

  • What is the importance of competing, contending, and improving in the dating world?

    -The speaker explains that the dating world is competitive, and men need to put in effort to improve their physical appearance, character, and other traits. Competing, contending, and improving help men to stand out and be seen as desirable by women.

  • How does the speaker explain the difference between someone trying to create attraction and someone who naturally attracts others?

    -Someone who tries to create attraction is seen as lacking internal confidence and discipline, according to the speaker. In contrast, a man who naturally attracts others does so through his presence and self-assurance, without needing to try or manipulate the situation.

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Related Tags
Attraction TipsSelf-ImprovementMasculinityDating AdviceConfidenceMen's HealthSocial SkillsRelationship TipsHypergamySex AppealPersonal Growth