WYD Keynote Speakers: Jason and Crystalina Evert on Chastity + Marriage

Summary

In this inspiring talk, the speaker reflects on the beauty of human love, marriage, and chastity, emphasizing that true freedom is found through self-giving love rather than selfish desires. Drawing from personal experiences, including the joy of expecting a child, the speaker underscores the importance of building strong foundations in relationships through friendship and purity. The message encourages individuals to look inward, face their fears, and respect their bodies and others. Highlighting the teachings of the Church, the speaker calls for a deeper commitment to living a virtuous life in preparation for lasting, meaningful relationships.

Takeaways

• 😀 Celebrate the joy of new life: The speaker shares the excitement of expecting a child and highlights the pure joy of announcing the news to their children, reinforcing the beauty of new life.
• 😀 Chastity is about freedom, not rules: The speaker emphasizes that chastity is often misunderstood as a series of restrictions, but it is actually about freeing individuals to love genuinely and deeply.
• 😀 Marriage preparation starts early: Marriage preparation isn't just for the engagement period; it starts from birth and continues throughout life. Focus on developing a pure foundation of friendship and understanding.
• 😀 Singleness can be a gift: The speaker encourages people to embrace their single years, focusing on self-reflection and understanding what they truly seek in a partner.
• 😀 Avoid 'missionary dating': It's important not to enter a relationship with the hope of changing someone, but to date with a clear understanding of who the person truly is.
• 😀 Self-improvement is key to finding love: Marriage is not about finding the perfect person, but about becoming the right person for someone else. Personal growth is necessary to love fully and well.
• 😀 Lust is a human problem, not just a male one: Both men and women struggle with lust, and breaking free from harmful habits, like pornography, is essential for finding true love.
• 😀 True love requires purity: The speaker advises to practice chastity to foster genuine love. Love built on purity and respect lasts longer than love based solely on physical attraction.
• 😀 Fear of commitment is common but must be faced: Fear of commitment, including fear of fatherhood or motherhood, often stems from societal misconceptions about freedom, but true freedom comes from commitment and love.
• 😀 Chastity preserves marriage: Chastity is not just for dating or pre-marital stages but is essential for sustaining a healthy marriage. It honors the gift of sexuality and strengthens relationships.
• 😀 Raising your standards leads to healing: The speaker shares personal experiences of overcoming a past of brokenness and how raising her standards and embracing chastity led to healing and ultimately to a fulfilling marriage.

Q & A

What is the main theme of the talk?

The main theme of the talk revolves around the importance of chastity, purity, and the understanding of love within relationships. It emphasizes that true love and healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, selflessness, and a foundation of spiritual and moral integrity.

What does the speaker mean by 'marriage preparation begins at birth'?

The speaker refers to Pope Francis' statement that marriage preparation starts at birth, suggesting that individuals should be prepared for marriage throughout their lives, not just during engagement. This preparation includes developing a sense of self-worth, moral values, and understanding the virtues that make healthy relationships possible.

Why is enjoying the season of singleness important?

Enjoying the season of singleness allows individuals to focus on building a solid foundation of friendship, self-reflection, and personal growth. It provides time to discern what qualities are important in a partner, as well as to heal any internal issues before entering into a relationship.

How does the speaker define successful marriages?

Successful marriages are not about finding the 'perfect' person but about perfecting oneself to become the person their partner deserves. A successful marriage involves mutual sacrifice, shared values, and a commitment to growing together in love and faith.

What does the speaker say about the relationship between pornography and relationships?

The speaker highlights that pornography is a harmful addiction that impedes one’s ability to form meaningful, loving relationships. He shares his personal struggle with pornography and stresses the importance of overcoming it to maintain purity, respect for others, and the ability to love selflessly.

How does the speaker suggest we should view the opposite sex?

Instead of viewing the opposite sex with objectification or lust, the speaker encourages seeing others as beings of beauty, worthy of respect. He recommends praying a Psalm of gratitude when encountering someone you're attracted to, thus fostering reverence for their dignity.

What does the speaker say about fear in relationships?

The speaker addresses various fears men and women face in relationships, such as fear of rejection or fear of commitment. He urges individuals to confront these fears, as genuine freedom and love are found through commitment and self-giving, not avoidance.

What is the false notion of freedom the speaker critiques?

The speaker critiques the false notion that freedom is about avoiding commitment or responsibility, such as the idea that having children or committing to a partner limits personal freedom. Instead, he emphasizes that true freedom is found in giving oneself away in love, as it leads to personal fulfillment and purpose.

What is the significance of chastity in relationships, according to the speaker?

Chastity is described as the key to preserving purity, self-respect, and love in relationships. It allows individuals to love deeply and authentically, and it holds marriages together by fostering a reverence for the gift of sexuality and the dignity of each person.

How does the speaker suggest handling relationships before marriage?

The speaker advises against living together before marriage or engaging in premarital sexual activity, as this undermines the foundation of trust and purity. He stresses that the longer the relationship, the more important it is to maintain chastity and focus on leading each other toward heaven.