What Men Consider Great Sex (10 Secrets Men Obsess Over)

Magnetize Your Man | Dating & Relationship Advice For Successful Women
20 Jan 202412:48

Summary

TLDRIn this insightful video, certified sexologist Kevin Anthony shares 10 key secrets to what men consider great sex. He emphasizes the importance of being fully engaged and enjoying the experience, having regular sex to maintain interest, and giving ample attention to a man's genitals. Kevin also highlights the significance of oral sex, being responsive during sex, and varying positions to keep the experience fresh and exciting. Trying new things, understanding the energetic and emotional components of sex, and being aware of a man's arousal level are also crucial. Lastly, he stresses the importance of being present and engaged in the act, creating a shared experience that leads to a deeper connection and more satisfying sex life.

Takeaways

  • 🔥 **Enthusiasm is Key**: Men consider great sex to be with a partner who is genuinely into it and engaged in the experience.
  • 🛏️ **Regularity Matters**: Having sex regularly is important for men to consider it great, as sporadic encounters can be unsatisfying.
  • 👤 **Attention to His Needs**: Men appreciate when their genitals receive attention, and it significantly contributes to their perception of great sex.
  • 💋 **Oral Sex Appreciation**: Receiving oral sex is something most men enjoy and consider it a major part of great sex.
  • 🎭 **Responsiveness Counts**: Being responsive during sex, through vocal or physical cues, is essential for men to feel that their partner is enjoying the experience.
  • 🤸‍♀️ **Variety is the Spice**: Mixing up positions and trying different things can keep sex from becoming routine and maintain a man's interest.
  • 🧪 **Innovation Welcome**: Trying new positions, locations, or introducing toys can prevent sex from becoming monotonous and add excitement.
  • 💖 **Emotional and Energetic Connection**: Men value both the emotional and energetic aspects of sex, which, when combined with the physical, can lead to a deeper connection.
  • 📈 **Understanding Arousal**: Being aware of a man's arousal level and managing the sexual energy can lead to more satisfying and longer-lasting sexual experiences.
  • 🧘‍♀️ **Staying Present**: Men want their partners to be present and engaged with them during sex, rather than just focusing on their own sensations.

Q & A

  • What is the first key secret mentioned for men to consider sex great?

    -The first key secret is that the woman is really into it, showing enthusiasm and being engaged in the sexual activity.

  • Why is regular sex important for men to consider it great?

    -Regular sex is important because it helps to maintain a strong physical connection and prevents the man from losing interest in the relationship.

  • What does it mean to 'give attention' in the context of the script?

    -Giving attention refers to focusing on the man's genitals, which is something that men appreciate and consider as a sign of great sex.

  • Why is the act of oral sex considered a significant part of great sex for men?

    -Oral sex is considered significant because it is something that men really love, desire, and crave, and being good at it can make a woman seem amazing in bed.

  • What does being 'responsive' during sex entail?

    -Being responsive means reacting to what's happening, making noises, moving the body, and providing feedback, which is important for a man to feel that his partner is engaged.

  • Why is it suggested to 'mix it up' during sex?

    -Mixing it up helps to keep the sexual experience alive, fresh, and prevents it from becoming routine or boring.

  • What is the importance of trying new things in sexual activities?

    -Trying new things can prevent sex from becoming routine and can introduce new experiences that can enhance the sexual relationship.

  • How does understanding the energetic and emotional components of sex contribute to great sex?

    -Engaging both the energetic and emotional components, along with the physical, can lead to a deeper and more satisfying sexual experience.

  • What does it mean to understand where a man is on his arousal scale?

    -Understanding a man's arousal level helps in managing the sexual encounter to ensure that both partners can reach climax at a mutually satisfying time.

  • Why is it important for a woman to be present and engaged during sex?

    -Being present and engaged means being fully involved in the shared experience with the partner, which is crucial for a man to feel connected and have a fulfilling sexual encounter.

  • What is the role of foreplay in creating great sex?

    -Foreplay is important as it can enhance arousal and set the stage for a more satisfying sexual encounter. It can also be mixed with other activities to keep the experience varied and exciting.

  • How can a woman help a man last longer during sex?

    -A woman can help a man last longer by being aware of his arousal level and adjusting her energy and actions to manage his arousal, allowing him to reach a sweet spot where he can control his ejaculation.

Outlines

00:00

🔥 Keys to Great Sex for Men: Understanding Desires

Kevin Anthony, a certified sexologist, Tantra counselor, NLP practitioner, and relationship coach, shares 10 secrets to what men consider great sex. He emphasizes the importance of a woman being genuinely engaged during sex, desiring regular sexual encounters, and giving attention to the man's genitals. Anthony also highlights the significance of oral sex and the woman's responsiveness through vocal and physical cues. He encourages variety in sexual positions and the willingness to experiment with new things to keep the sexual relationship fresh and exciting.

05:01

🛠️ Enhancing Intimacy: Mixing Up the Sexual Routine

Continuing the discussion on male sexual preferences, Kevin Anthony stresses the need to avoid a routine sexual pattern by incorporating foreplay, varying positions, and even introducing toys or new locations for intimacy. He also speaks about the importance of engaging both the energetic and emotional aspects of sex to achieve a deeper and more profound connection. Understanding a man's arousal level and helping him prolong sexual experiences until mutual climax is another key point. Anthony provides insights into the disparity between men's and women's average times to orgasm and offers advice for women to manage their partner's arousal to achieve better sexual satisfaction for both.

10:03

🧘‍♀️ Presence and Engagement: The Essence of Sexual Connection

In the final paragraph, Kevin Anthony focuses on the importance of being present and engaged during sex. He advises against getting lost in one's own sensations and instead encourages a woman to be an active participant in the shared experience. This co-creative process is essential for reaching a higher level of sexual intimacy. Anthony wraps up with suggestions for further learning through his YouTube channel, podcast, and additional resources available on his website, ensuring that the listener has avenues to continue exploring and improving their sex life and relationship.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Engagement

Engagement in the context of the video refers to the active participation and enthusiasm displayed by a partner during sexual activity. It is important because it signifies to the man that his partner is genuinely interested and enjoying the experience. An example from the script is the emphasis on a woman being 'really into it,' which means she is actively engaged in the sexual encounter, thus contributing to what men consider great sex.

💡Regularity

Regularity pertains to the frequency of sexual encounters in a relationship. The video suggests that for men, having sex regularly is a key component of what makes sex great. It implies a consistent and ongoing sexual connection rather than sporadic encounters. The script mentions that a man is unlikely to consider sex great if there are significant gaps between sexual activities.

💡Attention to Genitals

Attention to genitals is highlighted as a significant aspect of sexual satisfaction for men. The video suggests that men appreciate when their genitals receive focused and pleasurable stimulation. It is tied to the idea that men often desire direct attention to their sexual organs as part of what makes sex enjoyable and gratifying for them.

💡Oral Sex

Oral sex is mentioned as a highly valued component of sexual activity by men. The script indicates that men generally find receiving oral sex to be an important and pleasurable part of their sexual experience. It is presented as a desire and craving that, when fulfilled, contributes to their perception of the sexual encounter being great.

💡Responsiveness

Responsiveness in the context of the video refers to the verbal and non-verbal feedback a partner provides during sex, indicating their enjoyment and participation. This can include making noises, moving the body, or vocalizing desires. The video stresses that responsiveness is crucial for men to feel that their sexual partner is engaged and enjoying the experience, which in turn enhances the sexual encounter.

💡Variety

Variety is emphasized as a way to keep sexual experiences fresh and exciting. The video discusses the importance of changing positions, locations, and potentially introducing new elements such as toys. By 'mixing it up,' the sexual relationship is less likely to become monotonous, which is a key factor in maintaining a man's interest and considering the sex as great.

💡Novelty

Novelty involves the introduction of new experiences, positions, or locations to the sexual relationship. The video suggests that trying new things can prevent sex from becoming routine and can lead to discovering new preferences and enhancing pleasure. It is a way to keep the sexual connection dynamic and to explore new dimensions of intimacy with a partner.

💡Energetic and Emotional Connection

The video speaks to the importance of an energetic and emotional connection during sex, in addition to the physical act. It suggests that sex is not just about physical sensations but also involves an exchange of energy and emotions. Engaging these components can lead to a deeper and more profound sexual experience, which men find highly satisfying and consider as great sex.

💡Arousal Scale

The arousal scale is a concept used in the video to describe the level of sexual excitement a person is experiencing, with 1 being not turned on and 10 being ejaculation. The video advises women to be aware of where their partner is on this scale to manage the sexual encounter effectively. Understanding and navigating this scale can lead to more satisfying and simultaneous orgasms, which is a mark of great sex for men.

💡Presence

Presence in the video refers to the state of being fully engaged and attentive during the sexual experience. It implies that while physical sensations are important, being mentally and emotionally present with one's partner is also crucial. The video emphasizes that men value a woman who is not only experiencing pleasure but is also an active participant in the shared experience of sex.

💡Co-creation

Co-creation is a term used to describe the collaborative aspect of sexual experiences where both partners contribute to the overall experience. The video stresses that sex is not a one-sided act but a shared journey where both individuals are creating a pleasurable experience together. This concept is central to the idea of what makes sex great from a man's perspective, as it involves mutual effort and enjoyment.

Highlights

Men consider great sex when their partner is really into it, showing genuine engagement and enjoyment.

Regular sexual activity is important for men to consider sex as great; sporadic encounters are less satisfying.

Men appreciate when their partner gives a lot of attention to their genitals.

Oral sex and performing it well is something that men really love and desire.

Responsiveness in sex, including vocal and physical feedback, is crucial for men.

Being willing to mix up sexual positions and routines keeps sex exciting and fresh.

Trying new things, such as positions, locations, or introducing toys, can prevent sex from becoming routine.

Understanding the energetic and emotional components of sex can lead to a deeper and more satisfying experience.

Men value an emotional connection during sex, even if they struggle to articulate it.

Women should be aware of their partner's arousal level to help manage and control the sexual experience.

Great sex often involves lasting longer than the average sexual encounter, allowing for a more satisfying experience for both parties.

Men appreciate a partner who is present and engaged in the sexual experience, focusing on the co-creative aspect of their connection.

The ability to manage the arousal scale and delay immediate orgasms can lead to more intense and satisfying climaxes later on.

Men want their partners to be as invested in the sexual experience as they are, creating a shared and intimate connection.

Kevin Anthony, a certified sexologist, Tantra counselor, and relationship coach, shares insights based on over a decade of experience.

The importance of communication and understanding in maintaining a strong, happy, and loving relationship is emphasized.

The transcript provides a comprehensive guide for improving one's sex life and ensuring a physically satisfying relationship.

Transcripts

play00:00

what men consider great sex in this

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video I'm going to cover 10 key secrets

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of what men consider great sex so that

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you can have a deeper understanding of

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men's desires and cravings and so that

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you can have a better relationship

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without bad sex and without your man

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getting turned off or losing interest in

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a physical connection with you I'm Kevin

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Anthony with magnetize your man and I am

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a certified sexologist Tantra counselor

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NLP practitioner and sex love and

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relationship coach for over 10 years I

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have worked with men women and couples

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to help them have stronger happier more

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loving relationships and the best sex of

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their lives all right let's Dive Right

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In before I give you the 10 things I

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need to tell you that not all men will

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want these things however what is

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important to understand is the type of

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man that you want to magnetize will want

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these things so here's the first thing

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that men consider great great sex she is

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really into it yes that is right there

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is nothing worse than having sex with

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somebody who seems bored not into it not

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really engaged with what you are doing

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so for a man for him to really enjoy the

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sex and really think it's great sex he

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wants to know that you're into it too

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that you're enjoying it at least as much

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as he is if not more the next thing is

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she wants sex regularly there's no way

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that a man is going to say that you are

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great in bed and he loves having sex

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with you if the sex is sportic and

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there's huge gaps of time in between

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when you actually make love it's really

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important for men to have sex regularly

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and so they're not going to consider sex

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really to be great sex unless they are

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having it pretty regularly now that

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doesn't mean that he couldn't have sex

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one time and it was really amazing and

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he says that's great sex but we're

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talking about here in the context of

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magnetizing a man that you want for a

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long-term relationship and in that case

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for him to really think that the sexual

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component of your relationship is great

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it has to be regular the next one is

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that she gives his a lot of attention

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now when I'm coaching men I often tell

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them don't go straight for woman's

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genitals start elsewhere touch the back

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of her neck touch her legs touch her

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arms but with men you can go to the

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genitals and Men actually want you to go

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straight to the genitals so the more

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attention you give to his and his

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genitals the more he's going to think

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that this sex is great and that takes me

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to the next one which is [ __ ]

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[ __ ] [ __ ] I don't know a man

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that doesn't love a [ __ ] and men will

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absolutely think sex is great if they're

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getting [ __ ] somewhere in there and

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regularly especially if they're good

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[ __ ] so for the ladies here

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hopefully you enjoy giving [ __ ] if

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you don't I hope that you can find a way

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to learn how to enjoy it because it is

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something that men really love and

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really desire and really crave and they

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are really going to think that you are

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amazing in bed if you are good at it all

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right the next one is she is responsive

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what do I mean by responsive well what I

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mean is she is reacting to what's

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happening she's making noises she's

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moving her body you know maybe in the

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height of passion she's screaming you're

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being vocal you're speaking to him

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potentially telling him things that turn

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you on or that you want him to do to you

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it is really really really important for

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me and I know for a lot of other men

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that our partners are responsive they

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are reacting in the situation there's

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nothing worse than you know making love

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to a woman and she's just laying there

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like a log

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is she enjoying it I don't even know so

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it's really important that she is

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responsive and that she's giving

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feedback throughout they don't

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necessarily have to be verbal cues they

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can just be a way that you look at him

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it could be a sound that you make it

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could be your breathing it could be the

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way you move your body but being

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expressive in the love making Act is

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important the next one is she is willing

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to mix it up it is really important for

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men to do different things during a love

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making session and I'm always surprised

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how many people when they make love they

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just okay today we're in missionary

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position and and they just do missionary

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position for their 5 10 minutes 15

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minutes whatever and then they're done

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but to be really great sex you got to

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mix it up a little maybe you start

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missionary maybe you move to she's on

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top maybe you move to Doggy maybe you

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change from the bed to the to the couch

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or from the couch to the bed or

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something like that mix it up move

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around do different things it's maybe a

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good idea to start with foreplay and

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then go into penetration or maybe take a

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break from penetration and go back to

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some oral sex and then come back to

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penetration the idea is to mix it up to

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keep it alive to keep it fresh to do

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something different than the routine

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that you always do the next one is she

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is willing to try new

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things sex can get routine it shouldn't

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get routine but it can get routine for a

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lot of people one of the ways to make

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sure that it's not routine is to try new

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things new things could be a new

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position new things could be a new place

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in the house or maybe outside of the

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house new things could be introducing

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some toys to the mix there are a lot of

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different things that you could do to

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try something new so my suggestion is

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that you do that don't allow the sex to

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become routine and boring try try new

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things and I know as a man it's really

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exciting and fun to experiment and to

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try new things and if it doesn't work

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out laugh about it if it turns into a

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complete disaster laugh about it say you

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know what we're never going to do that

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again and then try something else you

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will be surprised how many things that

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you find that you didn't even know that

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you liked the next one is that she

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understands that there is both an

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energetic and emotional component to sex

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sex is not just physical Sensations

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there is an energetic piece so yes there

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is the friction of body parts moving

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together but there's also the energy

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that is exchanged between both of you

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and if you really want to take sex to

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the next level take it to what we would

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call mindblowing out of this world sex

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you have to engage the energetic

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component along with the physical

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component and then if you add the

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emotional component in there now you've

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really got something you've got the

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emotional component the energetic

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component and the physical component and

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that is how you have truly mindblowing

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sex now I know a lot of men get a bad

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rap for not being emotional uh and many

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of them if you were to ask them about

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the emotional component they may not use

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the right words to describe it but

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believe me men still want to have an

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emotional connection with you and if

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they've had a relationship in in the

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past where they've had an emotional

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connection during sex then they'll

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really know exactly what they're looking

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for if they haven't they might not be

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able to describe it or really understand

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exactly what's missing but when they

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finally get it then they'll go oh yeah

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that that took it to the next level the

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next one is she understands where he is

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at on his arousal scale now I do a lot

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of work teaching men how to last longer

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and how to be sexual Masters I spend a

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lot of my time doing that however no

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matter how good a man is at controlling

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his ejaculation and being able to last

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longer if a woman really really really

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really wants to take him over his Edge

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and really you know uses her physical

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and her energetic bodies to pull him

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over into ejaculation she can do that

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most of the time a lot of women actually

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do this unconsciously and aren't aware

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that they are doing doing it so to have

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really great sex in my mind it has to be

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way longer than the average there have

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been a few studies done uh on how long

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Men last and how long women last on

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average I talked this about this a lot

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on my

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show on average in one study they said

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Men last 3 to 5 minutes in another study

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it said that they last 5 to 7 Minutes

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whereas the average women took 20 to 30

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minutes to have an orgasm you can see

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there's a big disparity there so if you

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want to have really really great sex

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where both of you reach a climax then

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he's got to be able to last longer than

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that you know 3 to seven minutes is even

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10 minutes even 15 minutes so one of the

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things that you can do as a woman is to

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be aware of where he is in his arousal

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scale so on a scale of 1 to 10 10 being

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a jaculation you know one being not

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turned on at all where is he in that

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scale now there's a sweet spot between 6

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and8 which is really where he wants to

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be during that love making so as a woman

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it's a real skill for you to be able to

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pay attention and understand where

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relatively he's at in that scale and if

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you realize he's like at a 9ish you

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might want to back down your energy

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level a little bit and let his energy

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level come down and you can play with

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the energies like that if you're both

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aware of where you are in that arousal

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scale

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and you can manage to sort of ride the

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waves of energy until you choose to have

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an orgasm Now ladies I know what you're

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thinking I know what you're thinking but

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I was so close I was so close I didn't

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want to back my energy down because then

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I was going to lose my orgasm that is

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not necessarily true you may forego the

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immediate impending orgasm but you will

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likely have a bigger one later on down

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the road and more of them later on down

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the road

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if you are willing to back your energy

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down a little bit and let him recover

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after enough waves of up and down he

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should be able to get into a sweet spot

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where he can really hold it and

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withstand the powerful orgasmic waves

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that you are going to have so don't

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worry about foregoing that early orgasm

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especially if it's one of those early

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explosive clitoral orgasms because

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you're likely to reach bigger better and

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more orgasms down the road if you can

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help him ride those waves a little bit

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more and the last one is she is really

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present and engaged in the experience of

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sex what do I mean by that I mean that

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she is present with you what tends to

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happen when people and this happens for

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both men and women maybe men a little

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bit more but women still do this what

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happens is in the moment in that

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pleasure you get lost in your own head

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you close your eyes you roll your head

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back and you're lost in the moment there

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are Sensations happening to you but

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you're focusing more on the sensations

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and less on the person that you're

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actually having sex with so to have

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really great sex from a man's point of

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view I want my woman to be engaged with

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me now that doesn't mean you have to be

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staring me deeply in the eyes the entire

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time although that's not a bad thing but

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it does mean that you need to be really

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engaged in what we are co-creating

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together and that is a really big point

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this isn't me just giving to you you

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just given you me or anything like that

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this is a co-creation of the two of us

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that is how we get to those levels of

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mindblowing really amazing sex so moving

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forward it's important for you to make

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sure that you're doing these things so

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your sex life improves and your man will

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stay turned on and interested in you

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physically next if you'd like to hear

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more content from me you can follow me

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right here on YouTube at Kevin and

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Seline or you can listen to the love Lab

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podcast on any major podcast platform or

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right here on YouTube also if you go to

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Kevin andeline

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[Music]

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docomo library with tons of content on

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sex love and relationship I hope this

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was helpful and I'll see you soon

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