The Surprising Truth About Making Babies Late | Reisa Pollard | TEDxVancouver

Summary

In a candid discussion about fertility, the speaker uses the metaphor of a gumball machine to illustrate the limited supply of eggs women have from birth, emphasizing the challenges of delayed childbirth. Sharing personal experiences, including miscarriages and the pursuit of IVF and donor eggs, she reveals the emotional and physical toll of trying to conceive later in life. The speaker advocates for open conversations about fertility issues, highlighting the need for education and support for women facing these challenges, and encourages women to take control of their reproductive health choices.

Takeaways

• 😀 Women are born with a finite number of eggs, which decline in quantity and quality as they age.
• 🕒 By age 40, the chances of conceiving naturally are significantly reduced, often below 2% even with treatments like IVF.
• 👩‍🏫 Many women are unaware of these fertility facts due to a lack of education in sex ed and family discussions.
• 👶 There is a growing trend of women in their 30s having more babies than those in their 20s, indicating a shift in parenting norms.
• ❄️ Egg freezing is a viable option for women under 40, allowing them to preserve their fertility for later use.
• 🎉 The speaker's personal journey involved multiple career changes and a late marriage, leading to unexpected fertility challenges.
• 😢 The emotional impact of miscarriages is profound, and women often feel shame or embarrassment about their experiences.
• 💔 The journey through IVF can be filled with ups and downs, including multiple attempts and the potential for chromosomal issues.
• 🔍 The speaker emphasizes the need for open discussions about fertility challenges and the importance of sharing personal stories.
• 📚 Education about fertility should start in adolescence and continue into adulthood, empowering individuals to make informed choices about their reproductive health.

Q & A

What metaphor does the speaker use to explain women's fertility?

The speaker uses the metaphor of a gumball machine, where the machine represents a woman's ovaries and the gumballs represent her eggs. When a woman is born, the machine is full of gumballs (eggs), but as she ages, the supply diminishes.

At what age does the speaker suggest the chances of conception decrease significantly?

The speaker mentions that by age 40, the chances of turning remaining eggs into a baby, even with in vitro fertilization, drop to less than 2%.

How does the speaker describe the fertility of men compared to women?

The speaker explains that men produce about 219 million fresh sperm every day, totaling approximately 525 billion sperm in a lifetime, contrasting with women's finite supply of eggs.

What personal experiences does the speaker share about her journey to motherhood?

The speaker shares her experiences of getting married at 40, facing multiple miscarriages, undergoing fertility treatments, and eventually having children through a combination of her own eggs and donor eggs.

What societal misconception does the speaker highlight regarding women's fertility?

The speaker highlights the misconception that women can easily have children at older ages and emphasizes the lack of education regarding fertility issues in traditional sex education.

What options does the speaker mention for women wishing to preserve their fertility?

The speaker discusses the option of freezing eggs as a way to pause the biological clock, especially for women who have the financial means or work for companies that offer this benefit.

How does the speaker describe her emotional journey through multiple pregnancies and miscarriages?

The speaker describes a rollercoaster of emotions, from the excitement of pregnancy announcements to the deep grief of miscarriages, illustrating the psychological toll of fertility struggles.

What changes does the speaker propose regarding the discussion of fertility and miscarriages?

The speaker advocates for more openness and dialogue about fertility issues, suggesting that sharing personal experiences can reduce stigma and help others feel less alone in their journeys.

What was the outcome of the speaker's journey with IVF and donor eggs?

Despite multiple challenges and five miscarriages, the speaker eventually successfully conceived a child naturally after undergoing IVF and using donor eggs.

What final message does the speaker want to convey about fertility education?

The speaker emphasizes the importance of educating oneself about fertility and reproductive health, encouraging women to take charge of their reproductive choices and be informed about their options.