Bolehkah Memaksa Anak Masuk Pesantren?!

Papa Ihsan

24 May 202307:53

Summary

TLDRThis video script discusses the challenges parents face when enrolling their children in religious boarding schools (pondok pesantren), particularly when the child is resistant. The parents are concerned about their lack of knowledge in educating their child in Islamic teachings. The script emphasizes the importance of learning the Quran and Arabic, despite the difficulties. It advises persistence, patience, and communication with the school to accommodate the child's interests, such as sports. Ultimately, the message is about overcoming challenges in religious education for long-term spiritual growth.

Takeaways

📚 Sending children to Islamic boarding schools (pondok) is considered a way to protect them from the fires of hell by teaching them religious knowledge.
🤔 The parents feel that they lack the knowledge to educate their children at home, so they chose to send them to a sunnah-based boarding school.
😔 The child, however, is unhappy at the school, struggling with memorizing the Quran and learning Arabic, and missing their old activities, like volleyball.
🏠 Recently, the child left the school without permission and returned home, expressing dissatisfaction with the rigorous schedule.
🧠 The speaker emphasizes the importance of learning the Quran and Arabic, acknowledging the difficulty but stressing the rewards of seeking knowledge.
💡 The speaker encourages parents to be patient with their children’s resistance, recognizing it as part of their learning and growth process.
🎯 Children may not always understand the benefits of their parents' decisions, and it is essential for parents to gently guide them with love and discipline.
🏐 The speaker suggests that schools should consider incorporating extracurricular activities, like volleyball, to help children feel more at ease.
💪 The struggle of learning, especially in a boarding school environment, is acknowledged as challenging, but over time, students will adapt and thrive.
👥 Building friendships and community within the school is presented as one of the key benefits of staying in a pondok, offering social and spiritual growth.

Q & A

Why did the parents decide to send their child to a religious boarding school (pondok)?
-The parents decided to send their child to the pondok because they felt they lacked sufficient knowledge to educate their children in religious matters at home. They hoped the pondok would help in learning the Qur'an and following the sunnah.
What are the child's main reasons for not wanting to stay at the pondok?
-The child expressed discomfort due to the need to memorize the Qur'an and learn Arabic. Additionally, the child missed being part of a volleyball club, which contributed to their feelings of not wanting to stay.
How do the parents feel about their decision to send the child to the pondok?
-The parents feel conflicted. While some people encouraged them to remain patient and continue with the decision, others criticized them for forcing their child into the pondok. The parents are unsure if they made the right decision.
What advice is given regarding the child's resistance to staying at the pondok?
-The advice given is for the parents to approach the pondok and inform the teachers about the child's interests, such as volleyball, so that the child can find ways to stay engaged. It was also suggested that the parents should stay patient, as the child may not fully understand the benefits of being at the pondok yet.
Why is forcing the child to stay at the pondok considered necessary by some?
-Forcing the child is considered necessary because children often don't understand what's best for them. Just like giving money to a child, they may not know how to use it wisely. The discipline of the pondok is seen as beneficial, even if the child doesn’t like it initially.
What are some difficulties associated with studying at the pondok as described in the transcript?
-Studying at the pondok is described as challenging, with long hours dedicated to learning, memorizing the Qur'an, and doing other studies. Students also face different living conditions, such as waiting in line for food, which contrasts with the comfort of home.
How is the struggle of learning at the pondok compared to other forms of work or worship?
-Learning at the pondok is considered more difficult than other forms of work or worship. While people can take breaks from their jobs or rest at home, studying religious knowledge and memorizing the Qur'an requires continuous effort and perseverance.
What are the long-term benefits of studying at the pondok according to the speaker?
-The speaker mentions that, over time, the child will come to appreciate the benefits of the pondok, such as making friends and developing a deeper understanding of religious teachings. The experience of overcoming the initial discomfort will lead to personal growth and discipline.
What is suggested to help the child cope with the challenges at the pondok?
-It is suggested that the child be encouraged to take things slowly, rest when necessary, and ask Allah for strength to endure the challenges. The speaker emphasizes the importance of perseverance and faith during difficult times.
What does the speaker say about balancing religious education with personal interests like sports?
-The speaker acknowledges that it’s fine for the child to enjoy playing sports like volleyball, but stresses that religious education should take priority. He suggests that sports can be a secondary activity while the primary focus should be on becoming knowledgeable in religious matters.

Outlines

00:00

🌱 Parental Concern and the Decision to Send Their Child to a Religious School

The parents are grappling with the decision to send their child to a religious boarding school (pondok pesantren) as they believe it is essential for the child’s spiritual development and protection from negative influences, particularly since they themselves are newly learning about the Sunnah. Despite their son’s reluctance to attend, they enrolled him in hopes of his future benefit. However, their son recently left the school without permission and returned home, expressing dissatisfaction with the school's structure, which focuses on Quran memorization and learning Arabic. The parents are torn, as they face mixed reactions from others—some encouraging them to remain steadfast in keeping him at the school, while others criticize their decision. The parents seek guidance on both the merits of their son’s religious education and how to maintain patience in dealing with his resistance.

05:02

💪 Overcoming the Hardships of Religious Study and Building Resilience

The paragraph shifts focus to the inherent difficulty of religious education, particularly in a boarding school environment. The speaker highlights that while religious study, including Quran memorization, can be challenging and rigorous, it is a highly rewarded form of effort in Islam. The comparison is made between the structured life in a boarding school, where students endure long hours of study and strict schedules, and the ease of home life. This struggle is framed as part of the journey toward spiritual and intellectual growth. Parents are advised to recognize the hardship as a necessary part of their child's development, and the speaker emphasizes that enduring these challenges helps build resilience and ultimately leads to greater success. The process, though tough, is rewarding, and the child will eventually appreciate the effort as part of their spiritual journey.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Pesantren

A pesantren is an Islamic boarding school where students focus on religious studies, including memorizing the Quran and learning Arabic. In the video, pesantren is discussed as a place where the child is being sent to learn despite his initial reluctance. The concept highlights the parents' desire for their child to be in a religious environment to protect him from negative influences.

💡Al-Quran Memorization

Memorizing the Quran is an important religious practice in Islam. It is described as difficult but spiritually rewarding. In the video, the child struggles with this aspect of pesantren life, finding it challenging to adapt to the rigorous routine. However, the speaker emphasizes that persevering in Quran memorization is a way to attain blessings and personal growth.

💡Arabic Language

Arabic is the language of the Quran and is considered crucial for deeper religious understanding in Islam. The video mentions that the child is required to study Arabic in the pesantren, which adds to his discomfort. Learning Arabic is presented as a key component of religious education, essential for fully grasping Islamic teachings.

💡Parental Responsibility

Parental responsibility in the context of the video refers to the obligation of parents to guide their children towards the right path, even if the child resists. The parents in the video are portrayed as feeling inadequate in providing religious education themselves, which motivates them to send their child to a pesantren. The concept reinforces the idea that parents must sometimes make difficult decisions for the benefit of their child's spiritual well-being.

💡Patience (Sabar)

Patience, or 'sabar,' is a recurring theme in the video, where parents are encouraged to be patient with their child’s struggles and resistance to pesantren life. The speaker reminds the parents that learning and adapting to a new, strict environment takes time, and that patience will eventually lead to positive outcomes both for the child and the family.

💡Volleyball (Voli)

Volleyball, or 'voli,' symbolizes the child's personal interest and sense of normalcy outside of pesantren life. The child’s reluctance to stay at the pesantren is partly due to having to leave behind activities he enjoys, like playing volleyball. The speaker suggests finding a balance by allowing the child to continue pursuing this interest within the pesantren, showing the importance of catering to the child's personal passions while guiding them religiously.

💡Religious Sacrifice

Religious sacrifice refers to the idea that spiritual growth and religious education often require giving up certain comforts or personal preferences. The video emphasizes that memorizing the Quran and adhering to the pesantren routine can feel like a sacrifice, especially when contrasted with the ease of everyday life outside the pesantren. However, this sacrifice is framed as necessary for achieving greater spiritual reward.

💡Sunnah

Sunnah refers to the teachings and practices of the Prophet Muhammad, which are highly valued in Islamic tradition. The parents in the video express their desire to follow the Sunnah and to educate their child in a way that aligns with these teachings. Sending their child to a pesantren that follows the Sunnah is seen as a way to ensure they are adhering to proper Islamic values.

💡Socialization in Pesantren

Socialization in pesantren refers to the community aspect of life at the boarding school, where students form bonds with peers and share a collective learning experience. The speaker in the video reassures the parents that over time, their child will adjust and enjoy the companionship of other students, highlighting the role of friendship and social connection in making the experience more bearable.

💡Seeking Knowledge (Ilmu)

Seeking knowledge, or 'ilmu,' is portrayed as one of the most important deeds in Islam, surpassing even acts like charity and pilgrimage. The video emphasizes that the pursuit of religious knowledge, though difficult, is a noble endeavor that offers immense spiritual rewards. This underscores the importance of education in Islam, particularly in the context of the pesantren’s focus on religious studies.

Highlights

Parents admit they lack sufficient knowledge to educate their children at home, which led them to enroll their child in a religious boarding school.

The child dislikes the boarding school due to the heavy focus on memorizing the Quran and learning Arabic.

The child has a strong attachment to his volleyball club at home, adding to his discomfort at the boarding school.

Parents seek guidance on how to deal with the child's complaints and their own uncertainties regarding their decision.

Some community members encourage the parents to be patient, while others criticize their decision to send the child to the boarding school.

The speaker advises that sometimes children need to be pushed to do things they may not like, as they do not yet understand the long-term benefits.

The speaker recommends parents communicate with the school to find extracurricular activities, such as volleyball, to keep the child engaged.

Learning the Quran and seeking knowledge is framed as a challenging but highly valuable pursuit, even more so than charity or pilgrimage.

The speaker explains that it is normal for children in boarding schools to struggle with homesickness and the new routine but encourages perseverance.

The speaker shares personal experiences of adjusting to difficult routines during their own time in a religious boarding school.

Parents are encouraged to have discussions with the school and teachers to ensure the child’s well-being and to possibly introduce them to friends who can help them adjust.

The child is reminded that the path they are on is one of great virtue, even though it is difficult.

The speaker mentions the importance of sabr (patience) for both the child and the parents as they navigate this challenging period.

The speaker highlights the long-term benefits of learning the Quran, emphasizing that the struggle is part of a spiritual journey toward wisdom.

The speaker advises the child to rest when necessary but to continue climbing the metaphorical ladder towards becoming a scholar, rather than focusing solely on sports.