THINK FASTER, TALK SMARTER by Matt Abrahams | Core Message
Summary
TLDRIn 'Think Faster, Talk Smarter' by Matt Abrahams, the author shares practical strategies to manage speaking anxiety and improve impromptu communication. The 3S anxiety management plan—Separate yourself from anxiety, Slow your exhales, and Stick your landings—helps calm nerves and boost confidence. Abrahams encourages embracing silence, avoiding filler words, and daring to be 'dull' to quiet inner criticism. The book introduces the 'What, So What, Now What' structure to help speakers think on their feet and respond effectively. This guide equips readers with tools to speak more clearly, confidently, and authentically in high-pressure situations.
Takeaways
- 😊 Separate yourself from your anxiety: When you're anxious, treat it as if it were happening to someone else to gain better control.
- 😌 Slow your exhales: Extended exhales calm your nervous system, helping you slow down both your breathing and your speech.
- 🤐 Stick your landings: Avoid filler words by controlling your breath between points and embracing silence, which conveys confidence.
- 😅 Dare to be dull: Instead of aiming for perfection, focus on contributing simple, meaningful ideas to conversations.
- 🧠 Use the 'What, So What, Now What' structure: This three-part format helps organize thoughts and present them clearly during impromptu speaking.
- 🏗️ Think of conversation as building blocks: You don’t need groundbreaking ideas; sometimes, adding small but meaningful points to the discussion is enough.
- 😬 Manage anxiety by practicing: Executing the 3S plan—Separate, Slow, Stick—before speaking helps reduce performance anxiety.
- 🤝 Embrace spontaneity: Giving yourself permission to be less perfect leads to more authentic and effective communication.
- 💬 Structure your speech like a story: Just like Pixar uses story structures, use frameworks like 'Problem, Benefit, Solution' to present ideas persuasively.
- 🔄 Practice thinking on your feet: Regularly challenge yourself by summarizing content and applying the 'What, So What, Now What' structure in everyday situations.
Q & A
What is the 3S anxiety management plan mentioned in the book 'Think Faster, Talk Smarter'?
-The 3S anxiety management plan consists of: 1) Separate yourself from your anxiety, 2) Slow your exhales, and 3) Stick your landings. These steps help reduce anxiety and improve speaking performance.
How does separating yourself from your anxiety help with impromptu speaking?
-Separating yourself from anxiety involves observing your anxiety as if it were happening to someone else, which allows you to manage it better and still speak calmly, despite feeling nervous.
Why is slowing exhales more effective than simply taking a deep breath when nervous?
-Slowing your exhales reduces the amount of carbon dioxide in your body, which helps calm your nervous system. This also slows your speech, making it more controlled and deliberate.
What does 'stick your landings' mean in the context of speaking, and how can it reduce filler words?
-'Stick your landings' means embracing silence and avoiding filler words like 'uh' or 'um.' By timing your inhales after making a point, you prevent yourself from using fillers and convey confidence.
What is meant by 'dare to be dull,' and how does this mindset help in impromptu speaking situations?
-'Dare to be dull' encourages speakers to let go of the pressure to be perfect or say something profound. By allowing themselves to say something simple and straightforward, they become more authentic and relaxed, which often results in better communication.
How does the 'what, so what, now what' structure help in impromptu speaking?
-The 'what, so what, now what' structure provides a clear, logical format for impromptu speaking by first discussing an idea (what), explaining its importance (so what), and suggesting next steps (now what). This makes it easier to think on your feet and communicate clearly.
Can you give an example of how the 'what, so what, now what' structure might be used in a business meeting?
-In a business meeting, someone could say, 'Our monthly report shows that sales have dropped by 15% (what). If this continues, we may have to lay off staff (so what). To prevent this, I propose launching a new marketing campaign (now what).'
Why is it important to manage expectations about speaking perfectly in high-pressure situations?
-Striving to speak perfectly increases anxiety, which can disrupt communication. Accepting that it's okay to be 'dull' helps reduce self-criticism and allows for more authentic and effective communication.
What is the role of breathing in controlling speech pace, according to Matt Abrahams?
-Breathing plays a key role in speech control. Slowing your breath also slows your speech, making it more deliberate and less rushed, which improves clarity and confidence.
How does practicing the 'what, so what, now what' structure help improve impromptu speaking skills?
-By regularly practicing the 'what, so what, now what' structure after consuming information, such as listening to a podcast or reading an article, you train your mind to quickly organize thoughts, making it easier to respond effectively in impromptu speaking situations.
Outlines
🧠 Overcoming Anxiety in Impromptu Speaking
The speaker shares how reading *Think Faster, Talk Smarter* by Matt Abrahams has helped him manage his speaking anxiety, especially in high-stakes situations where he feels more nervous than others due to his stutter. He introduces the 3S Anxiety Management Plan, which consists of three key strategies: (1) Separate yourself from anxiety by mentally distancing yourself from it, (2) Slow your exhales to calm your nervous system and speech, and (3) Stick your landings by avoiding filler words and embracing silence to convey confidence. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of 'daring to be dull,' which helps reduce self-judgment and allows for more natural communication. This mindset has led to smoother, more authentic speaking experiences.
💬 Leveraging Structures for Smart and Spontaneous Speaking
The speaker discusses the value of using structured frameworks to sound smart and articulate during impromptu speaking. He mentions how professionals, like salespeople and lawyers, rely on specific structures to organize their thoughts and messages effectively. The simplest and most effective structure for spontaneous speaking is the 'What, So What, Now What' framework, which helps organize ideas by explaining the issue, its importance, and what actions should follow. To make this structure second nature, the speaker recommends practicing by applying it to everyday content like podcasts and articles. This approach helps in thinking on one's feet and delivering coherent, compelling, and genuine responses in high-pressure situations.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Anxiety Management Plan
💡Separate Yourself from Anxiety
💡Slow Your Exhales
💡Stick Your Landings
💡Dare to Be Dull
💡What, So What, Now What
💡Filler Words
💡Impromptu Speaking
💡Breath Control
💡Authenticity
Highlights
The book 'Think Faster, Talk Smarter' by Matt Abrahams helped develop an anxiety management plan for impromptu speaking situations.
The '3S Anxiety Management Plan' consists of: Separate yourself from your anxiety, Slow your exhales, and Stick your landings.
Separate yourself from your anxiety by observing it as if it were happening to someone else and offering yourself advice like you would to a nervous friend.
Slow your exhales to calm your nervous system and control your speech. Aim to exhale twice as long as you inhale.
Stick your landings by avoiding filler words like 'uh' or 'um,' embracing silence, and timing your inhales between sentences.
Dare to be dull—remove the pressure to be perfect, allowing yourself to communicate more smoothly and authentically.
By adopting the mindset of doing 'just good enough,' you reduce the fear of imperfection and become a better communicator.
Improv techniques like 'dare to be dull' help speakers relax and contribute logically, without trying to say something groundbreaking every time.
The 'what, so what, now what' structure is an easy, effective method for impromptu speaking. Start with a topic (what), explain why it's important (so what), and suggest a next action (now what).
Smart speakers and professionals often use structured formats like problem-benefit-solution or IRAC (issue, rule, analysis, conclusion) to communicate effectively.
Separating anxiety from yourself allows you to speak with confidence even while feeling nervous, helping you perform better in high-stakes situations.
Matt Abrahams teaches that focusing on breath control slows down speech and creates a more composed delivery.
Embracing pauses instead of using filler words gives the impression of confidence and helps improve communication.
The key to speaking well is being genuine and reacting authentically to situations rather than overthinking responses.
Matt Abrahams encourages developing these habits through practice by breaking down information into simple structures and using them regularly.
Transcripts
I recently read think faster talk
smarter by Matt
Abrahams I grew up with a stutter
therefore when I'm put on the spot and
asked hey Nathan what do you think in a
meeting full of important people I get
more anxious than most but the book
think faster and talk smarter has helped
me develop an anxiety management plan
that I can execute before every
impromptu speaking situation it's also
taught me an entirely new way to think
about speaking but has quieted my inner
critic and allowed me to speak freely
and lastly it's provided me with a
simple three-part speaking structure to
quickly conjure up something smart to
say in this summary I'll explain each of
those lessons in the hope that you can
use them the next time you're put on the
spot in high stakes social situation so
you can speak with more clarity and
confidence first the 3s anxiety
management plan the first s stands for
separate yourself from your anxiety when
put on the spot your anx anxiety
naturally Rises if you fail to manage
that anxiety you may start sweating
excessively speaking too fast and
stumbling on your words the key to
managing your anxiety is to remember
that you and your anxiety are two
separate things you can feel anxious and
still talk like someone who is
completely calm you do this by observing
your anxiety as if it were happening to
someone
else the instant you notice your
speaking anxiety taking over your body
imagine standing outside side of your
body and giving yourself advice like you
would offer advice to a nervous friend
say something like what you're feeling
is perfectly normal in this situation or
those nerves you feel are just a form of
excitement the next s stands for slow
your
exhales you've probably been told to
take a deep breath when you're nervous
and yes that helps but not nearly as
much as doing a slow extended exhale the
longer you exhale the more carbon
dioxide leaves your body and the less
carbon dioxide you have in your body the
less active your nervous system is
therefore when you feel anxious and
you've separated yourself from your
anxiety take a deep breath and then aim
to Exhale as long as possible A good
rule of thumb is to Exhale twice as long
as you inhale the added benefit of
slowing your breathing is slower more
controlled speech author Matt Abraham
says speaking is all about breath and
breath control the faster you breathe
the faster you speak slow your breathing
and your speech will also naturally
slow the last s stands for stick your
Landings when you're nervous you'll
naturally want to eliminate Dead Space
by using filler words like uh or um hi
um thank you for allowing me to speaker
today it's uh a real honor but if you
listen to any powerful speaker JFK
Churchill Dr Martin Luther King Jr
you'll notice an absence of filler words
as they embrace the silence between
their sentences if you learn to embrace
silence and banish filler words you will
convey confidence to your listeners and
feel more confident in the process the
easiest way to do this is to make it
nearly impossible to say filler words by
timing your inhales saying a word
including filler words requires that you
exhale so if you aim to empty your
breath after making a point and
immediately transition to a gentle
inhale between points you'll rarely
utter filler words you'll be like a
gymnast sticking the landing after a
series of flips and twists before
resuming your
performance if you execute this 3s
anxiety management plan you will reduce
your anxiety but if your goal is to
speak perfectly and be liked by your
audience that anxiety will quickly
return that's why you should dare to be
dull when you dare to be dull you are
less inclined to judge yourself as you
talk and simply say what's on your mind
when met Abrahams dares his Stanford
students to be dull they usually gasp
but when they try it their commun
communication becomes smoother and more
authentic he says in a delightful
Paradox the more mediocre you give
yourself permission to be the better
more compelling a speaker you become the
phrase dare to be dull comes from the
Improv world and helps sketch Comics be
more relaxed and spontaneous on stage
Steve Johnston past president of the
iconic sketch comedy club Second City
which produce stars like Chris Farley
Tina Fay and Steve Carell says we tend
to think we must come up with the big
idea aidea when we speak contributing
something important beautiful or
Transcendent like an onping cathedral
but providing the building block of a
conversation the brick also matters we
serve as Bricks by waiting listening and
at times offering up logical connection
between others ideas we don't have to
say something original or pathbreaking
every time so the next time you're put
on the spot and have a paralyzing fear
of saying something stupid and being
imperfect dare to be dull and just put
forth a brick a piece of information
that can help get others involved aim to
do just good enough no more no less
adopt this mindset and you'll be
delighted by how well you speak and how
much more people like
you so now that you're freed up to speak
more spontaneously and just be yourself
increase the chances of sounding smart
by using a go-to message structure smart
people rely on structures to deliver
their messages all the time smart
salespeople use the problem benefit
solution structure to reliably persuade
people and increase sales a simple
example is you look hot and thirsty
problem youd feel much better if you
consume some water benefit luckily I
have a cold and refreshing bottle of
ultra purified water right here
solution trial lawyers use the irac
structure to persuade a judge or jury
they State the issue bring up the
relevant legal rule analyze the issue
using that legal rule and then make a
conclusion based on their analysis Pixar
Studios uses a structure to reliably
tell a story develop characters and
produce hit movies the structure is Once
Upon a Time every day but one day
because of that and because of that
until finally and ever since then insert
character
transformation arguably the easiest and
most effective structure for impromptu
speaking is what so what now what in
meeting start by discussing an idea
problem or product the what then explain
why it's important so what and end by
describing what action should be taken
next now what for example our monthly
report shows that sales have dropped by
15% compared to the previous month if
this continues we will have to lay
people off to increase sales I propose
we launch the following marketing
campaign make the what so what now what
structure second nature by taking a
minute after listening to a podcast
podcast reading a news article or
watching an educational YouTube video to
decide what was that piece about why was
that information important and relevant
to my life and how can I use it going
forward in the end the next time you're
in an important meeting and someone puts
you on the spot manage your anxiety by
separating yourself from your anxiety
slowing your exhales and sticking the
landing after your first sentence then
dare to be dull so that you silence your
inner critic and be more
authentic then finally make it easy to
think on your feet and sound smart by
leveraging the what so what now what
structure Matt Abraham says we can train
ourselves to think and speak on our feet
reacting in ways that come across as
coherent compelling and unmistakably
genuine that was the core message that I
gathered from think faster talk smarter
by Matt
Abrahams if you want to get better at
thinking on your feet and sounding smart
this is the book for
you if you would like a onepage PDF
summary of insights that I got from this
book just click the link below and i' be
happy to email it to you if you already
subscribed to the free productivity game
email newsletter this PDF is sitting in
your inbox if you like this video please
share it and as always thanks for
watching and have yourself a productive
week
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