THINK FASTER, TALK SMARTER by Matt Abrahams | Core Message

Productivity Game
29 Oct 202308:17

Summary

TLDRIn 'Think Faster, Talk Smarter' by Matt Abrahams, the author shares practical strategies to manage speaking anxiety and improve impromptu communication. The 3S anxiety management plan—Separate yourself from anxiety, Slow your exhales, and Stick your landings—helps calm nerves and boost confidence. Abrahams encourages embracing silence, avoiding filler words, and daring to be 'dull' to quiet inner criticism. The book introduces the 'What, So What, Now What' structure to help speakers think on their feet and respond effectively. This guide equips readers with tools to speak more clearly, confidently, and authentically in high-pressure situations.

Takeaways

  • 😊 Separate yourself from your anxiety: When you're anxious, treat it as if it were happening to someone else to gain better control.
  • 😌 Slow your exhales: Extended exhales calm your nervous system, helping you slow down both your breathing and your speech.
  • 🤐 Stick your landings: Avoid filler words by controlling your breath between points and embracing silence, which conveys confidence.
  • 😅 Dare to be dull: Instead of aiming for perfection, focus on contributing simple, meaningful ideas to conversations.
  • 🧠 Use the 'What, So What, Now What' structure: This three-part format helps organize thoughts and present them clearly during impromptu speaking.
  • 🏗️ Think of conversation as building blocks: You don’t need groundbreaking ideas; sometimes, adding small but meaningful points to the discussion is enough.
  • 😬 Manage anxiety by practicing: Executing the 3S plan—Separate, Slow, Stick—before speaking helps reduce performance anxiety.
  • 🤝 Embrace spontaneity: Giving yourself permission to be less perfect leads to more authentic and effective communication.
  • 💬 Structure your speech like a story: Just like Pixar uses story structures, use frameworks like 'Problem, Benefit, Solution' to present ideas persuasively.
  • 🔄 Practice thinking on your feet: Regularly challenge yourself by summarizing content and applying the 'What, So What, Now What' structure in everyday situations.

Q & A

  • What is the 3S anxiety management plan mentioned in the book 'Think Faster, Talk Smarter'?

    -The 3S anxiety management plan consists of: 1) Separate yourself from your anxiety, 2) Slow your exhales, and 3) Stick your landings. These steps help reduce anxiety and improve speaking performance.

  • How does separating yourself from your anxiety help with impromptu speaking?

    -Separating yourself from anxiety involves observing your anxiety as if it were happening to someone else, which allows you to manage it better and still speak calmly, despite feeling nervous.

  • Why is slowing exhales more effective than simply taking a deep breath when nervous?

    -Slowing your exhales reduces the amount of carbon dioxide in your body, which helps calm your nervous system. This also slows your speech, making it more controlled and deliberate.

  • What does 'stick your landings' mean in the context of speaking, and how can it reduce filler words?

    -'Stick your landings' means embracing silence and avoiding filler words like 'uh' or 'um.' By timing your inhales after making a point, you prevent yourself from using fillers and convey confidence.

  • What is meant by 'dare to be dull,' and how does this mindset help in impromptu speaking situations?

    -'Dare to be dull' encourages speakers to let go of the pressure to be perfect or say something profound. By allowing themselves to say something simple and straightforward, they become more authentic and relaxed, which often results in better communication.

  • How does the 'what, so what, now what' structure help in impromptu speaking?

    -The 'what, so what, now what' structure provides a clear, logical format for impromptu speaking by first discussing an idea (what), explaining its importance (so what), and suggesting next steps (now what). This makes it easier to think on your feet and communicate clearly.

  • Can you give an example of how the 'what, so what, now what' structure might be used in a business meeting?

    -In a business meeting, someone could say, 'Our monthly report shows that sales have dropped by 15% (what). If this continues, we may have to lay off staff (so what). To prevent this, I propose launching a new marketing campaign (now what).'

  • Why is it important to manage expectations about speaking perfectly in high-pressure situations?

    -Striving to speak perfectly increases anxiety, which can disrupt communication. Accepting that it's okay to be 'dull' helps reduce self-criticism and allows for more authentic and effective communication.

  • What is the role of breathing in controlling speech pace, according to Matt Abrahams?

    -Breathing plays a key role in speech control. Slowing your breath also slows your speech, making it more deliberate and less rushed, which improves clarity and confidence.

  • How does practicing the 'what, so what, now what' structure help improve impromptu speaking skills?

    -By regularly practicing the 'what, so what, now what' structure after consuming information, such as listening to a podcast or reading an article, you train your mind to quickly organize thoughts, making it easier to respond effectively in impromptu speaking situations.

Outlines

00:00

🧠 Overcoming Anxiety in Impromptu Speaking

The speaker shares how reading *Think Faster, Talk Smarter* by Matt Abrahams has helped him manage his speaking anxiety, especially in high-stakes situations where he feels more nervous than others due to his stutter. He introduces the 3S Anxiety Management Plan, which consists of three key strategies: (1) Separate yourself from anxiety by mentally distancing yourself from it, (2) Slow your exhales to calm your nervous system and speech, and (3) Stick your landings by avoiding filler words and embracing silence to convey confidence. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of 'daring to be dull,' which helps reduce self-judgment and allows for more natural communication. This mindset has led to smoother, more authentic speaking experiences.

05:01

💬 Leveraging Structures for Smart and Spontaneous Speaking

The speaker discusses the value of using structured frameworks to sound smart and articulate during impromptu speaking. He mentions how professionals, like salespeople and lawyers, rely on specific structures to organize their thoughts and messages effectively. The simplest and most effective structure for spontaneous speaking is the 'What, So What, Now What' framework, which helps organize ideas by explaining the issue, its importance, and what actions should follow. To make this structure second nature, the speaker recommends practicing by applying it to everyday content like podcasts and articles. This approach helps in thinking on one's feet and delivering coherent, compelling, and genuine responses in high-pressure situations.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Anxiety Management Plan

The Anxiety Management Plan in the video refers to a strategy for controlling nervousness during impromptu speaking situations. It involves separating oneself from anxiety, slowing breathing, and avoiding filler words. The plan helps individuals remain calm and confident when speaking in high-pressure environments, like meetings.

💡Separate Yourself from Anxiety

This concept suggests treating your anxiety as a separate entity, rather than identifying with it. By observing it as if it were happening to someone else, you can manage nervousness and maintain control during stressful speaking situations. This mental shift allows the speaker to continue talking with calmness despite internal anxiety.

💡Slow Your Exhales

Slowing exhales is a technique to calm the nervous system during public speaking. By taking deep breaths and focusing on long exhalations, individuals can reduce anxiety and speak more slowly and clearly. This breathing technique helps regulate speech tempo and is a key element of the anxiety management strategy.

💡Stick Your Landings

Sticking your landings refers to avoiding filler words like 'um' and 'uh' by embracing pauses between sentences. The video emphasizes the power of silence in conveying confidence, urging speakers to breathe intentionally between thoughts, similar to how a gymnast confidently finishes a routine.

💡Dare to Be Dull

This phrase encourages speakers to embrace the possibility of being ordinary or imperfect. By allowing oneself to be 'dull,' the speaker becomes less self-critical and more authentic. This mindset reduces pressure and anxiety, ultimately leading to more fluid and confident communication.

💡What, So What, Now What

This is a three-part speaking structure used to quickly organize thoughts in impromptu speaking. 'What' refers to the main point, 'So What' explains its relevance, and 'Now What' provides action steps. This structure is an effective tool for delivering clear and organized messages in meetings or presentations.

💡Filler Words

Filler words are verbal pauses like 'um' or 'uh' that speakers often use when nervous or uncertain. The video advises against using them, as they disrupt fluency and diminish confidence. Instead, speakers are encouraged to embrace pauses, which project confidence and allow for more deliberate communication.

💡Impromptu Speaking

Impromptu speaking refers to delivering a speech or responding in a conversation without prior preparation. The video provides techniques, such as anxiety management and structured thinking, to help individuals speak more clearly and confidently in these unpredictable situations.

💡Breath Control

Breath control is the regulation of breathing to manage speech and reduce anxiety. In the video, it’s discussed as a critical aspect of public speaking. Slowing one's breath helps in controlling the pace of speech, which in turn allows for clearer, more composed communication.

💡Authenticity

Authenticity is the quality of being genuine and true to oneself while speaking. The video highlights how reducing anxiety and allowing for imperfection (daring to be dull) leads to more authentic communication, which in turn resonates more with the audience and enhances the speaker's credibility.

Highlights

The book 'Think Faster, Talk Smarter' by Matt Abrahams helped develop an anxiety management plan for impromptu speaking situations.

The '3S Anxiety Management Plan' consists of: Separate yourself from your anxiety, Slow your exhales, and Stick your landings.

Separate yourself from your anxiety by observing it as if it were happening to someone else and offering yourself advice like you would to a nervous friend.

Slow your exhales to calm your nervous system and control your speech. Aim to exhale twice as long as you inhale.

Stick your landings by avoiding filler words like 'uh' or 'um,' embracing silence, and timing your inhales between sentences.

Dare to be dull—remove the pressure to be perfect, allowing yourself to communicate more smoothly and authentically.

By adopting the mindset of doing 'just good enough,' you reduce the fear of imperfection and become a better communicator.

Improv techniques like 'dare to be dull' help speakers relax and contribute logically, without trying to say something groundbreaking every time.

The 'what, so what, now what' structure is an easy, effective method for impromptu speaking. Start with a topic (what), explain why it's important (so what), and suggest a next action (now what).

Smart speakers and professionals often use structured formats like problem-benefit-solution or IRAC (issue, rule, analysis, conclusion) to communicate effectively.

Separating anxiety from yourself allows you to speak with confidence even while feeling nervous, helping you perform better in high-stakes situations.

Matt Abrahams teaches that focusing on breath control slows down speech and creates a more composed delivery.

Embracing pauses instead of using filler words gives the impression of confidence and helps improve communication.

The key to speaking well is being genuine and reacting authentically to situations rather than overthinking responses.

Matt Abrahams encourages developing these habits through practice by breaking down information into simple structures and using them regularly.

Transcripts

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I recently read think faster talk

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smarter by Matt

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Abrahams I grew up with a stutter

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therefore when I'm put on the spot and

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asked hey Nathan what do you think in a

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meeting full of important people I get

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more anxious than most but the book

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think faster and talk smarter has helped

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me develop an anxiety management plan

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that I can execute before every

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impromptu speaking situation it's also

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taught me an entirely new way to think

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about speaking but has quieted my inner

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critic and allowed me to speak freely

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and lastly it's provided me with a

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simple three-part speaking structure to

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quickly conjure up something smart to

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say in this summary I'll explain each of

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those lessons in the hope that you can

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use them the next time you're put on the

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spot in high stakes social situation so

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you can speak with more clarity and

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confidence first the 3s anxiety

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management plan the first s stands for

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separate yourself from your anxiety when

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put on the spot your anx anxiety

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naturally Rises if you fail to manage

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that anxiety you may start sweating

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excessively speaking too fast and

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stumbling on your words the key to

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managing your anxiety is to remember

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that you and your anxiety are two

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separate things you can feel anxious and

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still talk like someone who is

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completely calm you do this by observing

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your anxiety as if it were happening to

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someone

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else the instant you notice your

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speaking anxiety taking over your body

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imagine standing outside side of your

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body and giving yourself advice like you

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would offer advice to a nervous friend

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say something like what you're feeling

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is perfectly normal in this situation or

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those nerves you feel are just a form of

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excitement the next s stands for slow

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your

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exhales you've probably been told to

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take a deep breath when you're nervous

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and yes that helps but not nearly as

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much as doing a slow extended exhale the

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longer you exhale the more carbon

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dioxide leaves your body and the less

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carbon dioxide you have in your body the

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less active your nervous system is

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therefore when you feel anxious and

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you've separated yourself from your

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anxiety take a deep breath and then aim

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to Exhale as long as possible A good

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rule of thumb is to Exhale twice as long

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as you inhale the added benefit of

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slowing your breathing is slower more

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controlled speech author Matt Abraham

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says speaking is all about breath and

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breath control the faster you breathe

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the faster you speak slow your breathing

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and your speech will also naturally

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slow the last s stands for stick your

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Landings when you're nervous you'll

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naturally want to eliminate Dead Space

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by using filler words like uh or um hi

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um thank you for allowing me to speaker

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today it's uh a real honor but if you

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listen to any powerful speaker JFK

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Churchill Dr Martin Luther King Jr

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you'll notice an absence of filler words

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as they embrace the silence between

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their sentences if you learn to embrace

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silence and banish filler words you will

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convey confidence to your listeners and

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feel more confident in the process the

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easiest way to do this is to make it

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nearly impossible to say filler words by

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timing your inhales saying a word

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including filler words requires that you

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exhale so if you aim to empty your

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breath after making a point and

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immediately transition to a gentle

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inhale between points you'll rarely

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utter filler words you'll be like a

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gymnast sticking the landing after a

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series of flips and twists before

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resuming your

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performance if you execute this 3s

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anxiety management plan you will reduce

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your anxiety but if your goal is to

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speak perfectly and be liked by your

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audience that anxiety will quickly

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return that's why you should dare to be

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dull when you dare to be dull you are

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less inclined to judge yourself as you

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talk and simply say what's on your mind

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when met Abrahams dares his Stanford

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students to be dull they usually gasp

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but when they try it their commun

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communication becomes smoother and more

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authentic he says in a delightful

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Paradox the more mediocre you give

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yourself permission to be the better

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more compelling a speaker you become the

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phrase dare to be dull comes from the

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Improv world and helps sketch Comics be

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more relaxed and spontaneous on stage

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Steve Johnston past president of the

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iconic sketch comedy club Second City

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which produce stars like Chris Farley

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Tina Fay and Steve Carell says we tend

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to think we must come up with the big

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idea aidea when we speak contributing

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something important beautiful or

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Transcendent like an onping cathedral

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but providing the building block of a

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conversation the brick also matters we

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serve as Bricks by waiting listening and

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at times offering up logical connection

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between others ideas we don't have to

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say something original or pathbreaking

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every time so the next time you're put

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on the spot and have a paralyzing fear

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of saying something stupid and being

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imperfect dare to be dull and just put

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forth a brick a piece of information

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that can help get others involved aim to

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do just good enough no more no less

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adopt this mindset and you'll be

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delighted by how well you speak and how

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much more people like

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you so now that you're freed up to speak

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more spontaneously and just be yourself

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increase the chances of sounding smart

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by using a go-to message structure smart

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people rely on structures to deliver

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their messages all the time smart

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salespeople use the problem benefit

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solution structure to reliably persuade

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people and increase sales a simple

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example is you look hot and thirsty

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problem youd feel much better if you

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consume some water benefit luckily I

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have a cold and refreshing bottle of

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ultra purified water right here

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solution trial lawyers use the irac

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structure to persuade a judge or jury

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they State the issue bring up the

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relevant legal rule analyze the issue

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using that legal rule and then make a

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conclusion based on their analysis Pixar

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Studios uses a structure to reliably

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tell a story develop characters and

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produce hit movies the structure is Once

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Upon a Time every day but one day

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because of that and because of that

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until finally and ever since then insert

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character

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transformation arguably the easiest and

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most effective structure for impromptu

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speaking is what so what now what in

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meeting start by discussing an idea

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problem or product the what then explain

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why it's important so what and end by

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describing what action should be taken

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next now what for example our monthly

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report shows that sales have dropped by

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15% compared to the previous month if

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this continues we will have to lay

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people off to increase sales I propose

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we launch the following marketing

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campaign make the what so what now what

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structure second nature by taking a

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minute after listening to a podcast

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podcast reading a news article or

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watching an educational YouTube video to

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decide what was that piece about why was

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that information important and relevant

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to my life and how can I use it going

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forward in the end the next time you're

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in an important meeting and someone puts

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you on the spot manage your anxiety by

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separating yourself from your anxiety

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slowing your exhales and sticking the

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landing after your first sentence then

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dare to be dull so that you silence your

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inner critic and be more

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authentic then finally make it easy to

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think on your feet and sound smart by

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leveraging the what so what now what

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structure Matt Abraham says we can train

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ourselves to think and speak on our feet

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reacting in ways that come across as

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coherent compelling and unmistakably

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genuine that was the core message that I

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gathered from think faster talk smarter

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by Matt

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Abrahams if you want to get better at

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thinking on your feet and sounding smart

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this is the book for

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you if you would like a onepage PDF

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summary of insights that I got from this

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book just click the link below and i' be

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happy to email it to you if you already

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subscribed to the free productivity game

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email newsletter this PDF is sitting in

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your inbox if you like this video please

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share it and as always thanks for

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watching and have yourself a productive

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week

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Related Tags
Public SpeakingAnxiety ManagementImpromptu SpeechConfidence Building3S MethodCommunication TipsThink FasterMatt AbrahamsSpeaking StructureSelf Improvement