How Narcissist Tests You 3 Times: Will YOU Pass?

Summary

This script discusses the dynamics of narcissistic abuse, emphasizing that the narcissist's choice of victim is not based on the victim's qualities but on what they can exploit. It outlines three tests narcissists use to select victims: the ability to be idealized, provision of at least two of the '4 S's' (sex, supply, services, safety), and vulnerability to the shared fantasy. The speaker clarifies misconceptions about the spectrum of narcissism, asserting that while traits exist on a spectrum, the diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder is binary.

Takeaways

• 🔥 Narcissistic abuse can be as devastating as hell itself, causing immense psychological torment.
• 😣 Victims often try to make sense of the abuse by attributing it to their own positive qualities, which is a form of self-deception.
• 🧐 Narcissists are not selective; they target anyone who can provide them with the four 'S's: Sex, Supply, Safety, and Services.
• 🔎 Narcissists assess potential victims through three tests: idealization potential, ability to provide two of the four 'S's, and vulnerability to the shared fantasy.
• 👤 Idealization by a narcissist is not based on the victim's true qualities but on a distorted image that the narcissist creates.
• 🔍 The 'Supply' can be either narcissistic (adoration) or sadistic (inflicting pain to feel powerful).
• 🔒 'Safety' refers to the victim's potential for addiction to the narcissist or the shared fantasy, making them stay in the relationship.
• 🕵️‍♂️ Narcissists use a form of empathy, devoid of emotional connection, to identify vulnerabilities in potential victims.
• 🚫 The myth that narcissists target only specific 'types' or exceptional individuals is debunked; they are opportunistic and exploitative.
• ❌ The notion of a spectrum of narcissism within the clinical diagnosis is contested and not supported by mainstream academic research.

Q & A

What is the primary factor that leads someone to be targeted by a narcissist?

The primary factor is not any specific personal trait but the individual's availability and willingness to participate in the narcissist's shared fantasy and provide at least two out of the four 'S's: sex, supply (narcissistic or sadistic), services, and safety.

What are the four 'S's that a narcissist looks for in a victim?

The four 'S's are sex, supply (narcissistic or sadistic), services, and safety. These represent the benefits that the narcissist seeks from their target.

How does a narcissist determine if someone can be idealized?

A narcissist determines if someone can be idealized by identifying minimal traits, assets, behaviors, or looks that they can exaggerate and inflate to create an idealized image of the person in their mind.

What is the role of the 'idealized image' in the narcissist's manipulation process?

The idealized image is used by the narcissist to make the target fall in love with themselves through the narcissist's gaze, becoming addicted to the process and thus more susceptible to manipulation.

How does a narcissist evaluate if a person can provide services?

A narcissist evaluates if a person can provide services by assessing their abilities and resources, such as driving, fixing things, social interaction, or mathematical skills, that the narcissist can exploit for their benefit.

What is the difference between narcissistic supply and sadistic supply?

Narcissistic supply involves adoration, admiration, and aggrandizement, while sadistic supply is derived from inflicting pain and suffering on others, affirming the narcissist's self-perception as omnipotent.

Why is the concept of safety important to a narcissist when choosing a victim?

Safety is important because the narcissist seeks a victim who is likely to become addicted to the relationship, someone with a maternal instinct, or someone who is loyal and inertial, ensuring the victim's continued participation in the relationship.

How does a narcissist use empathy to their advantage?

A narcissist uses a form of cold empathy, which combines reflexive and cognitive empathy without emotional empathy, to scan and identify a potential victim's vulnerabilities and weaknesses.

What is the significance of vulnerability in the narcissist's selection process?

Vulnerability is significant because it indicates a person's susceptibility to the shared fantasy. A narcissist looks for signs of damage, escapism, romanticism, or low self-love that make someone more likely to be drawn into their manipulative dynamic.

What does the author mean when they say 'narcissists don't choose their victims because they are wonderful'?

The author means that the myth of narcissists targeting exceptionally empathetic or flawless individuals is false. Instead, narcissists choose victims based on what they can exploit from them, not because of any positive qualities the victims possess.

What is the author's stance on the existence of a spectrum of narcissism?

The author clarifies that while there is a spectrum of narcissistic traits and behaviors, once a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is made, it is binary—either one has it or not. The author rejects the idea of varying degrees of NPD as unsubstantiated and clinically unsupported.

Outlines

00:00

🔥 Understanding Narcissistic Abuse

This paragraph discusses the concept of narcissistic abuse, portraying it as an agonizing and harrowing experience akin to hell. It emphasizes the victim's struggle to find meaning in the chaos of their relationship with a narcissist. The speaker explains that victims often try to justify their situation by attributing their selection by the narcissist to their own positive qualities, such as empathy and kindness. However, the paragraph clarifies that narcissists are indiscriminate in their choice of victims and are driven by the need for the 'four S's': sex, supply, narcissistic or sadistic supply, and safety. The speaker, Sak, introduces himself as an expert in the field and sets the stage for a deeper exploration of the topic.

05:01

🕵️‍♂️ The Narcissist's Selection Process

The second paragraph delves into how a narcissist identifies potential victims. It outlines three tests that a narcissist applies to determine if someone is suitable for their needs. The first test is whether the individual can be idealized, which means the narcissist looks for minimal traits to exaggerate and use as a basis for admiration. The second test is the ability to provide at least two of the four S's, which include sex, services, supply (narcissistic or sadistic), and safety. The paragraph explains that the narcissist is not interested in a genuine partnership but rather in what they can extract from the relationship.

10:03

🔍 Dissecting the 'Four S's

This paragraph breaks down the 'four S's' that a narcissist seeks from their victims. Sex refers to the narcissist's need for sexual satisfaction that caters to their fantasies. Services involve the narcissist exploiting the victim's skills or resources, such as driving or fixing things. Supply, which can be narcissistic or sadistic, refers to the emotional sustenance the narcissist receives, either through adoration or by inflicting pain. Safety is about the victim's reliability and predictability in providing the narcissist with what they need. The speaker highlights the exploitative nature of the narcissist's mindset and how they view potential victims as sources to be mined for their benefit.

15:05

🌐 The Shared Fantasy and Vulnerability

The fourth paragraph continues the discussion on the narcissist's selection criteria, focusing on the third test: vulnerability to the shared fantasy. The narcissist uses a form of empathy, devoid of emotional connection, to identify a victim's weaknesses and potential for being drawn into their idealized world. The speaker explains that the narcissist looks for signs of damage, daydreaming, romanticism, or a lack of self-love that would make a person susceptible to the illusion of perfection that the narcissist offers. This vulnerability is key for the narcissist to establish control and maintain the relationship on their terms.

20:07

🚫 Debunking Narcissistic Myths

In the final paragraph, the speaker debunks the myth that narcissists choose their victims based on the victims' positive qualities. Instead, the narcissist's selection is based on what they can exploit from the victim. The paragraph also addresses the misconception of a spectrum of narcissism, clarifying that while there are varying degrees of narcissistic traits, the diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is binary, not a matter of degree. The speaker emphasizes that narcissists do not value empathy or kindness and sees these qualities as weaknesses. The paragraph concludes with a reminder that the narcissist's choice of victim is not a reflection of the victim's worth but rather the narcissist's predatory nature.

Keywords

💡Narcissist

A narcissist is someone with an inflated sense of self-importance, often requiring excessive admiration from others. In the video, the term is used to describe individuals who engage in manipulative behaviors to fulfill their own needs, often at the expense of others. The script discusses how narcissists are indiscriminate in their choice of victims, not because of who the victims are as individuals, but because of what they can provide to the narcissist.

💡Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic abuse refers to the psychological manipulation and control exerted by a narcissist over another person. The video script describes it as a harrowing experience akin to hell, emphasizing the profound emotional and psychological impact it has on the victim.

💡Four S's

The Four S's are a set of criteria that a narcissist looks for in a potential victim: Sex, Supply, Safety, and Services. The script explains that a person who can provide at least two of these is likely to be targeted by a narcissist. Sex refers to the physical aspect, Supply could be either narcissistic (admiration) or sadistic (inflicting pain), Safety pertains to the victim's reliability and predictability, and Services are the practical help the narcissist receives.

💡Idealization

Idealization in the context of the video refers to the process by which a narcissist inflates and exaggerates the positive traits or achievements of a person to create an idealized image. This is used as a tool to manipulate the victim into a relationship or to maintain control over them. The script mentions that even minimal traits can be idealized by a narcissist.

💡Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. The video script contrasts the lack of empathy in narcissists with the concept of 'cold empathy,' which is a manipulative form of empathy used by narcissists to identify and exploit the vulnerabilities of others. It is devoid of genuine emotional connection.

💡Vulnerability

Vulnerability in this context refers to the susceptibility of a person to be manipulated or controlled by a narcissist. The script explains that narcissists look for individuals who are vulnerable to their shared fantasy, which may include those with a damaged or broken past, a tendency to daydream, or a romanticized view of reality.

💡Shared Fantasy

The shared fantasy is a false reality or narrative created by the narcissist that the victim becomes a part of. The video describes how narcissists use this fantasy to lure victims into a relationship, often by promising a sense of perfection, idealism, and self-gratification that does not exist in reality.

💡Predator

In the video, the term predator is used metaphorically to describe the narcissist's behavior in seeking out and targeting victims. The script likens the narcissist to a predator searching for prey, emphasizing the predatory nature of their approach to relationships.

💡Codependency

Codependency is a personality style characterized by an excessive reliance on others for approval and a low sense of self-worth. The script mentions codependency as a trait that narcissists might exploit, as codependent individuals may be more likely to become addicted to the idealized image presented by the narcissist.

💡Trauma Bonding

Trauma bonding is a psychological phenomenon where a person forms strong emotional ties with an abusive partner. The video script discusses how narcissists can induce trauma bonding, particularly through the manipulation and control that occurs in an abusive relationship.

💡Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a clinical diagnosis characterized by a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. The script addresses misconceptions about the existence of a spectrum of NPD, arguing that while there is a spectrum of traits, the disorder itself is binary – one either has it or does not.

Highlights

Narcissistic abuse is described as an exquisite form of agony, akin to hell itself.

The victim often tries to make sense of the senseless by attributing their selection to personal qualities like empathy or intelligence.

In reality, the narcissist is indiscriminate and promiscuous in mate selection, seeking anyone who can provide the four S's: Sex, Supply, Safety, and Services.

The narcissist's choice of victim is not based on the victim's special qualities but on their availability and utility.

The narcissist puts potential victims through three tests to assess their suitability.

Test one: Are you capable of being idealized by the narcissist?

Test two: Are you able to provide at least two out of the four S's?

Test three: Are you vulnerable to the shared fantasy?

The narcissist creates an idealized image of the victim to make them fall in love with themselves through the narcissist's gaze.

The four S's are detailed: Sex, Services, Supply (narcissistic or sadistic), and Safety.

The narcissist uses cold empathy to scan potential victims for vulnerabilities.

Vulnerability to the shared fantasy is a key factor in becoming a victim of narcissistic abuse.

The process is mechanical and algorithmic, not based on personal traits or qualities.

The narcissist views potential victims as mines to be excavated, not as individuals.

The myth that narcissists choose victims because of their wonderful qualities is debunked.

The speaker clarifies the academic stance that there is no spectrum of narcissism in the clinical diagnosis.

The distinction between mild, moderate, and severe levels of personality disorders is contentious and not supported by clinical studies.

The speaker provides a link to an article in the description that recaps the debate on the spectrum of narcissism.

Transcripts

no Agony more Exquisite and more

harrowing than the pseudo relationship

with the

narcissist narcissistic

abuse it is a paratory it is Hell itself

with Everlasting

fires and so you need to make sense of

the

senseless you you need to imbue with

meaning the random events that led to

your crucifixion and

immolation in the fires of the

narcissist and so you tell yourself that

you have been

chosen chosen because you're empathic

because you're kind because you're

compassionate because you wanted to give

you're a

giver because you are drop dead gorgeous

hyper intelligent and so on so forth

keep trying to

inject some am modicum of sense into

what has

happened you were chosen that makes

sense you were chosen by someone who is

essentially quintessentially

evil but of course this is

nonsense it is self-aggrandizing

nonsense it renders you angelic

but it is also counterfactual nonsense

that is not what happens in

reality the

narcissist is

indiscriminate the narcissist is

promiscuous when it comes to mate

selection he would choose as a mate

anyone anyone who is able to provide the

narcissist with a four

s's the four s's are

sex Supply narcissistic or

sadistic safety and services two of the

4S would suffice for you to qualify as

the narcissist long-suffering intimate

partner best friend coworker anyone

anyone who gravitates towards the Ambit

of the black hole that is known as The

Narcissist so it's not that you are

something

special your trades

even your looks are meaningless to The

Narcissist what matters to the

narcissist is your availability to play

the game to participate with him in his

shared fantasy and to become an

extension of himself and a servant

subservient submissive always there this

is what we're going to discuss today

because the question

arises there is no type there is no type

that the narcissist is attracted to the

narcissist is not attracted to you

because he doesn't see

you the narcisist couldn't care less

about empathy and kindness he wouldn't

recognize empathy and kindness if they

were to fall on his head from a very

from very

high so that that's this is not what

matters to The Narcissist what matters

to the narcissist is your willingness

enthusiastic willingness to provide the

four 's and yet this raises the question

how did how does the narcissist

recognize willing

providers ample providers appropriate

providers qualified providers how do how

does n

separate would be good providers from

those who are unable to provide the

narcissist to cater to The Narcissist

needs how does narcissist discern

usually on a first encounter within the

first few minutes how does the

narcissist

discern that you could be a great victim

material the prey that he is a predator

is looking for how does an narcissis see

you on a first date on a first meeting

for the first

time my name is Sak I'm the author of

malignant self- love narcissism

Revisited the first book ever ever on

narcissistic abuse I'm a professor of

Clinical Psychology in seaps Cambridge

United Kingdom and I am currently a

newly appointed visiting professor of

psychology and

economics in

southeast um Europe European

University okay credentials aside let's

move

on the narcissist comes across you you

come across a narcissist

you see each other across a room you you

date each other you talk to each other

uh you find yourself engaged in the same

project in the workplace you become best

friends with the narcissist or so you

think how does the narcissist recognize

you as the right the right partner in

his and participant in his shirt

fantasy The

Narcissist puts you through three

tests and the tests are are you capable

of being idealized by The

Narcissist test number two are you able

to provide at least two out of the four

S's and test number three are are you

vulnerable not vulnerable to The

Narcissist but are you vulnerable to the

shared

fantasy and let me elaborate a bit on

each of these um on each of these tests

test number one are you capable of being

idealized do you have the minimal traits

minimal assets the minimal behaviors the

minimal looks emphasis on minimal which

would allow the narcissist to latch onto

them leverage them exaggerate them

inflate them and use them to

idealize The Narcissist can idealize and

would idealize

anything if you're in a wheelchair he

would idealize your

willow if you are drop dead gorgeous he

would idealize your looks if you're

minimally attractive and not so drop

more drop dead than gorgeous he would

idealize that narcissist would idealize

anything if you uh graduated high school

but never went on to college you would

idealize your entrepreneurial Spirit or

free spirit or rebellious Spirit if you

did go on to College he would idealize

your intelligence The Narcissist just

needs an excuse to idealize you he needs

to get to know you better he creates an

inventory in his mind of all your

personal history events circumstances

people you know traits your traits

various assets you

possess physiological mental and

material your behaviors your

interactions and interpersonal

relationships with other people once he

has amassed once he has agglomerated and

accumulated this database about you once

he has put together the file the dossier

about you he can then idealize each and

every one of these elements and create

an image of you a representation of you

in his mind an avatar a snapshot an

inject that has nothing to do with you

he then grants you access to this

idealize idealized image of yourself in

order for you to fall in love with

yourself through him through his gaze

and become addicted to the

process

so it is very rare that the narcissist

finds nothing to idealize as I just

mentioned even if you are an

underachiever even if you are fugly

excuse the excuse the expression excuse

my French even if you are

dumb as a KN even whatever you are the

narcissist would take it run with it and

produce an idealized version of it it

would create a narrative where your

particular deficiencies and lacks and

flaws are actually glamorized and

glorified and render you a perfect

entity a perfect

being the only time a narcissist fails

to find anything to idealize is if if

you hold back if you avoid if you

withdraw if you reject the narcissist if

you're critical of the narcissist if you

disagree with the narcissist repeatedly

if you humiliate the narcissist and

shame The Narcissist especially in

public at that point The Narcissist

would be unable to idealize

you okay that's test number one having

passed this test narc says to himself

there are quite a few things in this

potential intimate partner in this best

friend in this coworker in this boss in

this leader of a political party the

pastor in the church and neighbor there

are quite a few things I can

idealize and therefore I can Embark and

move on to the next stage and the next

stage is the

question is she or he able to provide

two of the four

S's and to remind you the four s's are

Sixx Services Supply sadistic or

narcissistic and safety your

presence let's break each one of these

down

six The Narcissist asks himself which

two of the four s's this individual who

can be idealized which two of the four

s's is he or she able to provide with

relative safety regularly and

predictably start with sex do you find

the narcissist

attractive are you enthusiastic about

having sex with the

narcissist um would sex with you be both

consensual and

submissive are you prone to sexual

fantasies are you unbounded and kinky

sexually self trashing and

promiscuous are you likely to cater to

The Narcissist own sexual fantasies go

on an exploration of the autoerotic

nature of the narcissist sex or

psychosexuality if the answer to all

these is yes a resounding yes then

you're definitely able to provide the

first s of the four six next services

are you able to provide the narcissist

with the services that he needs and

lacks for example um a narcissist who

does not have a driving license would

look for someone who can serve as a

shaare as a driver a narcissist who is

unable to fix things at home would look

for someone uh who is an able handyman

or handy woman an narcissist who is

unable to interact well with other

people would look for someone who is

sociable and can serve as an interface a

go between and Inter and provide

intercession and intermediation with

other people a narcissist who is not

very good in math would look for someone

who is very good in mouth narcissist who

is uh profligate and not spend Thrift

and very bad with money would look for

someone who is the compliment now this

is common this is common in normal

healthy regular couples as well but the

narcissist is not thinking in terms of

synergy he's thinking his thinking does

not dwell on let's work together let's

collaborate and become I don't know a

power couple the naris is thinking is

how much can I take how can I exploit

her or him it's an exploitative mindset

can I make her drive me forever can I

take her money forever can I make him um

cater to my needs on a regular basis so

it's a highly exploitative mindset The

Narcissist does not

regard the other person person as an

integral part of a diet or a couple he

regards the other person the way a minor

regards a mine as an opportunity for

extraction Services number three Supply

number three of the four Essence Supply

Supply could be

narcissistic or could be sadistic

narcissistic Supply is adoration

admiration adulation being someone's fan

and follower and so on so forth

aggrandizing the other person so this is

narcissistic Supply sadistic Supply is

when the narcissist is able to inflict

pain and suffering on people thereby

proving to himself that he or she is

omnipotent all powerful and Godlike

inflicting pain on other people gives

the narcissist enormous pleasure but not

in the classical sense classic sadistic

sense but enormous the enormous pleasure

of validating and affirming the

narcissist self-perception and

self-image is Godlike he can inflict

suffering on other people he can cause

them pain he can witness them rising in

agony because he is divine he is a deity

so this is narcissistic Supply and

sadistic Supply The Narcissist puts you

uh through another minute is are you

able to be an adoring fan are you able

to be uncritical of the narcissist never

disagree with him never find fault with

him be submissive masochistic and even

self-loathing

if you can if you are like that then you

can provide Supply and you will will

have become a reliable

predictable uh source of Supply next

safety

do you have an addictive personality are

you likely to get addicted to The

Narcissist or to the narcissist shared

fantasy or to the way the narcissist

sees you addicted to yourself to your

idealized self through the narcissist

gaze addiction addiction is the glue

that hold the holds the shirt fantasy

together so one of a question narcissis

asks is this person potentially addicted

could potentially become an addict so of

course codependence are a good choice

borderlines are a better choice but not

necessarily many healthy people actually

do have an addictive

personality next question does he or she

have a maternal Instinct can I leverage

this maternal instinct to induce bonding

and attachment especially trauma bonding

is this person loyal and inertial in

other words unable to stop doing

whatever it is she's doing unable to

exit a relationship because she is

committed to the same course of action

inertial simply means that you move in

the same path unable to stop yourself or

reverse has to do with addiction

addiction of course so this is the

second test is he or she as an intimate

partner as a friend as a colleague as a

boss as a past whatever is he or she

able to provide two two of the four 's

sex Services Supply and safety if the

answer is yes you can be idealized

that's test number one and you can

provide two out of the four s's we move

on to the the third stage the third

stage is the narcissist scans you the

narcissist and Psychopaths possess

called empathy called empathy is a

Confluence a combination of reflexive

empathy and cognitive empathy but

without the emotional component

emotional empathy is absent missing so

the narcissist uses cold empathy to

penetrate you to scan you to map your

vulnerabilities your the chinks in your

armor to Traverse your defenses and

invade your mind to entrain you Etc so

the narcissist scans you this is the

third test and the narcissist question

is is she vulnerable is he vulnerable to

the shirt fantasy is there a

vulnerability to the Shar fantasy for

example is this person damaged and

broken is she a

Daydreamer does he abhor reality is this

person romantic even as a friend

grandio does this person have a deficit

of self-love Etc if the answer is yes to

any of these let alone to a combination

of these this is the kind of person who

would be vulnerable to the charms of the

shared fantasy to the to the alternate

reality offered by the shared fantasy

this paracosm of perfection ideal ideal

Hedonism and the self-gratification that

emanates from this paradise like or

heaven-like setting

let me summarize it for

you you have not been chosen there is no

specific type the narcissist is

attracted to the narcissist asks himself

three questions and he makes you he

subjects you to three

tests if you pass these three tests you

qualify to be the narcissist intimate

partner best friend

colleague neighbor or whatever these are

the

are you capable of being

idealized are are you are you there

aren't you rejecting The Narcissist

aren't you disagreeing with the narcist

aren't you critical of the narcis if

you're not any of these and you're there

you're available question of

availability you qualify test number two

are you able to provide two of the four

critical essential esses sex Services

Supply andx safety if yes the third test

is are you vulnerable to the shared

fantasy and if the answer to these three

is a resounding yes you're in and the

narcissist pounces on you and you become

the narcissist prey that's as simple as

that it's an algorithm it's a

mechanical automated robotic algorithm

The Narcissist couldn't care less about

your traits your qualities your kindness

your empathy even your looks or

intelligence or what have you on the

very contrary by the way the narcissist

abhor and resents competition so he

wouldn't choose someone who hyper

intelligent and super good-look when he

when he is not he couldn't identify

empathy even when confronted with it and

he regards empathy and love as

weaknesses intrus intrusions

annoyances actually if regards any help

and advice his narcissistic injury

because you're challenging his

grandiosity in short narcissists don't

choose their victims because their vict

their victims are such wonderful Angelic

blameless Flawless people that is a

self-aggrandizing myth a narcissistic

myth

actually Nar narcissist chooses you not

because of who you are but because of

what he can take from you safely in the

long term predictably and

regularly The Narcissist depletes

you think of yourself as a mine and the

narcissist as a minor or an excavator

that is the Shir

fantasy ah

sorry one more thing I forgot I received

an avalan of messages from many of you

that it is not true that there is no

spectrum of narcissism or other

personality disorders there are

definitely uh V varieties of narcissism

that there are mild cases there moderate

cases and there are severe cases there's

a spectrum and it could be less

narcissistic highr narcissist this

narcissist that let me clarify something

this is not what we think in academ this

is not the Orthodoxy that's not the

mainstream that's not what our studies

in the past 40 years have

shown however it is true that the 11th

edition of the ICD the international

classification of

diseases this addition does distinguish

between mild moderate and severe levels

of clinically diagnosable personality

disorders personality disorder there's

only one diagnosis there but this this

distinction between mild moderate and

severe levels or intensities of

personality disorder in the clinical

phase this is a highly contentious

claim actually the majority of Scholars

myself included reject this claim in the

icd1 we think it's a mistake it is

utterly unsubstantiated clinically no

study supports it

it's we have no idea none of us have any

idea where it came from maybe from

YouTube and if you go to the

description there's a link to a recent

article I think two years old where the

authors recap this debate and they also

make

clear

that there is no foundation for the

claim that there is a spectrum or

Continuum of intensities of Personality

dis disorders or the single personality

disorder in the ICD there's no such

thing we do of course have narcissistic

we do have styles we for example

narcissistic Style versus narcissistic

disorder or narcissistic personality

disorder yes there are people who are

narcissistic but they are not

narcissists they cannot be diagnosed

with

NPD it's true that there is a spectrum

or Continuum of traits and behavior

all this is true but once the diagnosis

has been rendered once you've been

diagnosed with narcissistic personality

disorder it's

binary it's binary like pregnancy either

you have it or you don't and there are

no gradations and no levels and no

intensities and no grades when in

narcissistic personality disorder all

the rest you can find in the video that

I've made a few days ago okay time to

let go me I know you're addicted but you

know give me a break see you later