Da insicura a leader di se stessa - ascolta ora l'intervista di Isabella

Dott. Alessandro Conforti Di Lorenzo
7 Apr 202301:57


TLDRThe speaker discusses their strategy for handling confrontational situations where others attempt to provoke them. They've learned to recognize when someone is trying to 'get under their skin' and have chosen to conserve their energy for more productive endeavors. By staying silent and not engaging in battles, they've found a way to maintain control and encourage a more positive mindset. They've noticed significant personal growth, using meditation and mental exercises to shift from negative to positive thinking. This change in approach has equipped them with better tools to manage themselves in challenging social interactions.


  • 🌟 Recognizing provocation: The speaker realizes when someone is trying to provoke them with the intent to cause anger.
  • 💡 Wasted energy: The speaker acknowledges the importance of not wasting energy on unnecessary arguments and instead using it constructively.
  • 🔥 Managing anger: The speaker has learned to manage their anger and not let it control their actions.
  • 😌 The power of silence: Choosing to remain silent in certain situations can be an effective way to maintain control and avoid conflict.
  • 🚫 Non-engagement: By not engaging in a battle, the speaker finds that they can win without fighting, by staying calm and composed.
  • 🧘‍♀️ Meditation and self-reflection: The speaker uses meditation as a tool to handle negative emotions and to shift their mindset towards positivity.
  • 🌈 Positive thinking: The speaker emphasizes the transformation from negative to positive thinking and the importance of maintaining a positive mindset.
  • 🎒 Carrying tools: The speaker mentions carrying the lessons and tools they've learned with them to manage different situations and interactions.
  • 📈 Personal growth: The speaker has noticed significant personal growth and change over time, especially in their ability to make choices and handle emotions.
  • 🔍 Continuous practice: The speaker encourages continuous practice and testing of the learned techniques to see how they can change and improve oneself.

Q & A

  • What is the main issue the speaker is facing when someone wants to provoke them?

    -The main issue the speaker is facing is the challenge of not getting angry and not wasting their energy on a pointless discussion when someone tries to provoke them.

  • How does the speaker initially react to provocation?

    -Initially, the speaker gets angry but realizes that it is a waste of energy to engage in a pointless discussion.

  • What strategy does the speaker use to avoid wasting energy on unproductive discussions?

    -The speaker chooses to invest their energy into physical activities and maintaining their composure instead of engaging in the discussion.

  • How does the speaker describe their approach to handling situations where they might lose control?

    -The speaker finds it more successful to maintain silence and not give the other person the satisfaction of a reaction, thus avoiding the battle.

  • What has the speaker noticed about themselves that has changed over time?

    -The speaker has noticed that they have become more positive and have developed the courage to make choices that improve their mental state.

  • What techniques does the speaker use to manage their mental state?

    -The speaker uses meditation and exercises focused on dealing with anger to shift their mindset from negative to positive.

  • How does the speaker feel about carrying their learnings with them?

    -The speaker believes in carrying their positive thoughts and learnings with them as a tool to continue testing and improving their reactions in challenging situations.

  • What impact does the speaker's change in mindset have on their interactions with others?

    -The change in mindset helps the speaker to better manage themselves in situations with others, as they have learned tools to handle their reactions.

  • What advice would the speaker give to someone dealing with similar challenges?

    -The speaker would advise someone to focus on self-improvement, practice mindfulness, and apply the learned techniques to manage their reactions in difficult situations.

  • How does the speaker view the importance of self-awareness in managing conflicts?

    -The speaker views self-awareness as crucial in managing conflicts, as it allows them to recognize their emotional state and choose not to engage in unproductive battles.

  • What is the key takeaway from the speaker's experience in dealing with provocations?

    -The key takeaway is the importance of not letting others' actions control your emotions and instead focusing on personal growth and maintaining a positive mindset.



🤗 Handling Provocation and Control

The speaker discusses their approach to dealing with provocation and the desire to engage in unproductive discussions. They emphasize the importance of understanding that such situations are attempts to elicit anger and waste energy. Instead of reacting, the speaker has learned to conserve their energy for more positive actions. They share their realization that maintaining silence and not engaging in battles can be more effective. The speaker also mentions personal growth and the use of meditation to shift from negative to positive thinking, highlighting the courage to make choices and the continuous practice of applying learned tools to manage oneself in challenging situations.




Provocation refers to the act of deliberately stimulating someone to anger or to elicit a strong reaction. In the context of the video, the speaker discusses how someone might want to provoke them with the intention of causing an argument. The speaker has realized that by not reacting with anger, they can conserve their energy and not let others control their emotions.


Control in this context refers to the ability to manage one's emotions and reactions in the face of provocation. The speaker talks about situations where they might lose control but have learned to maintain it by not engaging in unproductive discussions. It's about self-regulation and emotional intelligence.

💡Energy Conservation

Energy conservation here is a metaphor for not wasting one's emotional and mental energy on unnecessary conflicts. The speaker has realized the importance of saving this energy for more productive purposes, such as personal growth and positive actions.


Silence, as discussed in the video, is a strategy for dealing with provocation. It involves choosing not to respond to negative stimuli, thereby maintaining control and avoiding unnecessary conflict. It's a form of non-engagement that allows the speaker to focus on their own well-being.


Non-engagement is the act of consciously deciding not to participate in a discussion or argument, especially when it's unproductive or harmful. In the video, the speaker uses non-engagement as a method to avoid battles and maintain peace, which ultimately leads to winning in a non-confrontational manner.


Meditation is a practice of focusing the mind and reaching a state of mental clarity and calmness. In the video, the speaker mentions using meditation as a tool to manage negative emotions, such as anger, and to foster a more positive mental state.

💡Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand, use, and manage one's own emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflict. The video's theme of managing reactions to provocations is closely tied to emotional intelligence, as the speaker discusses the importance of not letting others dictate their emotional state.

💡Positive Thinking

Positive thinking involves focusing on optimistic and constructive thoughts, which can lead to a more fulfilling life. The speaker in the video emphasizes the shift from negative to positive thinking as a result of their mental journey and the practices they've adopted, such as meditation.

💡Personal Growth

Personal growth refers to the process of improving one's character, self-awareness, and interpersonal skills. The speaker in the video talks about personal growth as a result of their mental efforts and the tools they've learned to manage themselves better in challenging situations.

💡Mental Health

Mental health encompasses emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and act, and can significantly impact our overall health and well-being. The video discusses the importance of mental health practices, such as meditation and positive thinking, in managing emotions and reactions.

💡Conflict Resolution

Conflict resolution is the process of resolving disagreements or arguments in a peaceful and constructive way. The video emphasizes the importance of not engaging in conflicts by using silence and non-engagement as tools for conflict resolution, which can lead to personal victory without escalating the situation.


Understanding the intention behind someone's provocative behavior

Recognizing when someone wants to trigger an argument to waste your energy

The realization of not wanting to waste energy on unnecessary disputes

Learning to control reactions and not let others affect your emotional state

The importance of staying silent in situations where silence is more powerful

How silence can communicate disinterest in engaging with the other person

Winning a battle without fighting by maintaining composure

The shift in mindset from negative to positive through meditation and self-reflection

The courage to make choices and its impact on personal growth

Using moments of downtime to reflect and practice mental exercises

The mental journey of transforming negative thoughts into positive ones

Carrying the lessons and tools learned with you for future situations

The continuous process of testing and applying these tools in real-life scenarios

The transformative power of changing one's mindset and approach to situations

The ripple effect of personal change on the way you interact with others

The importance of being proactive in self-improvement and maintaining a positive outlook



quando c'è qualcuno che vuole provocarmi


per scatenare una discussione io non so


ehm sono riuscita a capire a chi lo


vuole Diciamo tra virgolette fregarmi


Cioè nel senso che vuole far sì che io


mi devo arrabbiare Ma io mi sono


arrabbiata ma hai capito una volta però


vedevo ehm sprecare le mie energie su


una discussione stupida cioè


quell'energia metterla in corposa che


appunto quello che appunto sto facendo


quindi situazioni in cui potevi perdere


un po' il controllo si riuscirà a


mantenerla mantenerla più riuscita a


restare in silenzio e col silenzio e


comunicato all'altro non ne voglio


sapere l'altra persona non ha così


continuate certo una battaglia si vince


non combattendo ma restando anche Fermi


Infatti quando non c'è stata reazione


quindi dobbiamo ovviamente la diciamo il


voler pizzicare per forza creare Cioè è


andata scemare cerco anche di auto


incoraggiarmi cioè sono un po' più


positiva Indovina anche spontaneo questa


è la cosa che ho notato che cambiamento


e ha detto rispetto a prima ho notato


cioè tanta differenza rispetto a me di


qualche mese fa tu di aver avuto diciamo


il coraggio di fare una scelta di


scegliere Ci sono dei momenti di Down


quindi utilizzi meditazione e poi fai


riferimento all'esercizio che ne so


sulla rabbia sulla come se un certo


senso questo questo percorso mentalmente


ti rende cioè cambia mentalmente ti


cambia pensi prima negativo e poi dopo


arriva quel momento che tu dici ah e


altri quel pensiero positivo quindi


per questa combinazione di queste due


fatture Porta ancora tutto ciò con te


nella valigetta e testa lì continua a


testarli a provarli perché vedrai che


cambieranno come cambierei tu


cambieranno anche gli strumenti che tu


hai imparato per gestire te stesso in


quelle situazioni con gli altri e da



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