Navigating life as a third culture kid | Vicky Schdeva | TEDxYouth@ISPrague

Summary

The transcript explores the experiences of third culture kids—individuals raised in multiple cultural environments. It discusses the challenges of answering the seemingly simple question 'Where are you from?' due to their complex identities, shaped by diverse cultures. The narrator highlights benefits like adaptability, open-mindedness, and intercultural skills, but also addresses challenges such as feeling misunderstood, cultural confusion, and the need to adapt or 'lie' to fit in. The transcript calls for greater understanding and empathy toward third culture kids, recognizing both their strengths and the isolation they sometimes face.

Takeaways

• 🌍 The question 'Where are you from?' can be simple for some, but complex for others, especially third culture kids.
• 👫 Third culture kids (TCKs) are individuals who have been raised in multiple cultures and struggle to identify with just one.
• 🔍 TCKs develop unique intercultural and interpersonal skills due to their exposure to various cultures, making them adaptable and open-minded.
• 💬 Despite the benefits of being a TCK, they often face the challenge of being misunderstood and people simplifying their identity to just one culture.
• 🤔 TCKs grapple with identity confusion when asked which culture they identify with most, as their deep cultural identity is a blend of multiple influences.
• 🏞 The concept of the 'cultural iceberg' highlights that surface culture (language, customs) is easy to spot, but deep culture (values, beliefs) shapes a person's personality significantly.
• 🎭 Many TCKs adopt a 'chameleon' strategy, adjusting their identity and appearance to fit different situations, sometimes resorting to lies to simplify interactions.
• 📊 The experience of being a TCK shapes behavior, making it challenging to navigate family expectations, authority, and friendships.
• 💔 While TCKs may seem to easily adapt and make friends, they often experience deep attachment and loss due to the transient nature of their relationships.
• 🔄 TCKs often feel isolated despite their many benefits, and society needs to understand and accommodate their complex identities.

Q & A

What is a third culture kid (TCK)?

A third culture kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of their developmental years in a culture different from their parents' culture, leading them to build relationships with multiple cultures. This concept was coined by American sociologists Pollock and Van Reken.

What are some common examples of third culture kids?

Common examples of third culture kids include children of expatriates, missionaries, diplomats, immigrants, and those born into cross-cultural marriages.

What are the advantages of being a third culture kid?

The advantages of being a third culture kid include being adaptive, easily crossing and changing cultures, developing excellent interpersonal and intercultural skills, being open-minded, and living in the moment.

What is the 'culture iceberg' concept, and how does it relate to TCKs?

The 'culture iceberg' concept, created by Dr. Robert Kohls, illustrates that culture is more than just visible customs and traditions; it deeply influences beliefs and values. For TCKs, their deep cultural experiences shape their personalities and worldview, making it difficult for others to understand their full identity based on surface-level cultural traits.

What challenges do third culture kids face in their daily lives?

Third culture kids often face challenges such as being misunderstood by others, having their multicultural identity reduced to a single culture, difficulty answering questions like 'Where are you from?', and struggling with cultural identity.

How do third culture kids typically respond to questions about their cultural identity?

Third culture kids often feel confused or uncertain when asked about their cultural identity. They may adapt their answers based on the situation, sometimes oversimplifying or even lying to fit others' expectations and avoid lengthy explanations.

What is the concept of a 'cultural chameleon' in the context of TCKs?

A 'cultural chameleon' refers to a TCK's ability to switch languages, behaviors, and appearances to blend into different cultural environments. While this skill helps them adapt, it can also lead to identity struggles and a sense of not fully belonging to any culture.

How does being a TCK affect relationships and friendships?

TCKs may develop unique approaches to relationships, such as easily making friends due to their adaptability but also becoming deeply attached, leading to difficulties when friendships end. Their multicultural background can influence how they interact with friends and authority figures.

What are some examples of famous people who were third culture kids?

Famous examples of third culture kids include Barack Obama (half Kenyan, half American), Uma Thurman (born in Mexico to a German father and Swedish mother), and Freddie Mercury (born in Tanzania, grew up in India and the UK).

How does society typically interact with third culture kids, and what could be improved?

Society often struggles to understand the complex identities of TCKs, leading to oversimplified views of their cultural backgrounds. To improve interaction, society could focus on recognizing and appreciating the full depth of TCKs' multicultural experiences and identities.