Stand Up Comedy Dzawin: Di Pesantren Ustad Gua Jadi Komentator Bola, Adem... - SUCI 4

Summary

The script humorously highlights the world of sports commentary, focusing on how football commentators describe matches. It contrasts conventional football with a religious school setting, where even the commentary is spiritual and humble, with references to modest celebrations and playful offside interpretations. The speaker jokes about their own experiences in a religious school football team, where players wore jerseys with Arabic letters and were humble about their achievements. The tone shifts to aerobics classes, adding humor about exercise and lighthearted infotainment-style commentary. It's a mix of comedy and cultural insights.

Takeaways

• 😂 The speaker humorously talks about a comic character who is a master at badminton and crying at the same time.
• 😅 The speaker emphasizes that football commentators are the most objective because they simply describe what happens on the field.
• 🤣 A joke is made about commentators watching too many cartoons like Captain Tsubasa, which could affect their commentating style.
• 😇 The speaker reminisces about his time in a pesantren (Islamic boarding school) and how his religious studies intertwined with playing futsal.
• ⚽ The futsal games at the pesantren had a more spiritual focus, where players used hijaiyah (Arabic letters) as their jersey numbers and avoided praise to remain humble.
• 🙏 Players were more concerned about stopping for prayer (adhan) than following rules like offside.
• 😂 A humorous take is given on how futsal at the pesantren was played differently, with goals aimed toward the qibla (the direction of prayer).
• 📢 The speaker reflects on how sports and entertainment should be fun and light-hearted, referring to a workout program for mothers as a funny example.
• 😆 Another comedic reference is made about hosting a workout show, humorously mixing instructions with entertainment and exaggeration.
• 🤣 The final takeaway is about how the speaker finds certain topics funny, with an emphasis on how the delivery of the jokes makes them stand out.

Q & A

What is the main topic discussed in the script?

The script humorously discusses various topics, including soccer commentary, personal experiences, and religious influences in sports.

Why does the speaker mention that soccer commentators are the most objective people?

The speaker claims that soccer commentators are the most objective because they always describe exactly what happens on the field, without distorting the truth.

What does the speaker say about the impact of watching cartoon shows like Tsubasa on soccer commentary?

The speaker humorously suggests that watching cartoon shows like Tsubasa can influence a soccer commentator's perspective, making them less objective.

How does the speaker relate religious experiences to playing futsal (indoor soccer)?

The speaker shares a personal experience of playing futsal in a pesantren (Islamic boarding school) where religious practices and values influenced the way they played and celebrated, with a focus on modesty.

What humorous detail does the speaker share about their futsal team's jerseys?

The speaker mentions that their futsal team wore jerseys with hijaiyah (Arabic script) numbers instead of conventional numbers, and everyone had the same name, 'Hamba Allah' (Servant of God), on the back to avoid receiving praise.

How did the speaker's team react to hearing the call to prayer (adhan) during their futsal game?

The speaker humorously notes that their team would immediately stop playing upon hearing the adhan, regardless of the game situation, to prioritize religious obligations.

What does the speaker joke about the offside rule in their futsal games?

The speaker jokes that their team didn't care about the offside rule; instead, they were more concerned with the boundaries of purity ('batas suci') on the field.

What does the speaker suggest is the true essence of sports?

The speaker suggests that sports should be enjoyable and entertaining, as implied by the Oxford dictionary definition of 'sport' as a form of entertainment.

What comedic scenario does the speaker describe about hosting a fitness show?

The speaker humorously describes hosting a fitness show for women, instructing them to lift their legs forward and backward while cautioning them not to step on a sharp object on the floor.

How does the speaker conclude their comedic routine?

The speaker ends with a playful reflection on the day’s material, complimenting a particular topic as being the best, before humorously breaking into laughter.

Outlines

00:00

🎤 Comedic Commentary on Life, Sports, and Humility

The speaker humorously discusses various topics, starting with his skills in badminton, followed by a playful critique of sports commentators, especially in football. He highlights how commentators often overstate situations or make the game more dramatic than it really is, comparing it to a personal memory from his time playing futsal at a pesantren (Islamic school). There, the commentary was more serene and religiously mindful, reflecting the school's culture. The speaker reflects on how the students wore jerseys with Arabic script and how their celebrations were modest, fearing the sin of pride. This playful narrative blends Islamic teachings with sports and humor.

Keywords

💡Komik

In the context of the script, 'komik' refers to a comedian. The speaker is likely discussing the persona of a comedian, using humor and relatable content, especially through the lens of everyday experiences. This connects to the theme of humor and entertainment throughout the video.

💡Komentator bola

The term 'komentator bola' translates to 'football commentator.' In the script, the speaker humorously describes how commentators narrate football matches, often exaggerating or emphasizing trivial moments to create excitement. The concept highlights the role of commentary in sports as both an informative and entertaining medium.

💡Futsal

Futsal is a variant of football played on a smaller, indoor field. The script mentions futsal in the context of the speaker's personal experience playing it in a religious school. This highlights the blend of sports and tradition, adding depth to the humorous anecdotes about playing futsal with religious themes.

💡Pesantren

'Pesantren' refers to an Islamic boarding school in Indonesia. The speaker mentions attending a pesantren in Banten, where religious education is combined with extracurricular activities like futsal. This concept is crucial in blending humor with cultural and religious references, showing how different aspects of life coexist in the speaker's narrative.

💡Subhanallah

This Islamic expression means 'Glory be to God.' In the script, it is humorously used by a futsal commentator in a religious setting to describe a player's dribble. This word illustrates the contrast between the usual secular nature of sports commentary and the religious context in which the speaker is playing.

💡Ego

Ego refers to a person's sense of self-importance. The speaker humorously mentions being an alumnus of a pesantren and the ego that can come with it, juxtaposing humility with pride. This adds to the comedic reflection on personal experiences and identity.

💡Hijaiyah

'Hijaiyah' refers to the Arabic alphabet used in the Quran. The script mentions how the speaker and his friends wore jerseys with hijaiyah letters as their numbers during a futsal game, further adding to the religious humor. This highlights the blending of religious and secular life.

💡Syariah

'Syariah' refers to Islamic law. In the script, the speaker humorously describes playing 'Syariah' football, where the direction of play is toward the 'qibla' (the direction of Mecca) and players stop when they hear the call to prayer. This adds a satirical twist to the intersection of sports and religion.

💡Adzan

The 'adzan' is the Islamic call to prayer. The speaker humorously states that during their futsal game, they only stop playing when they hear the adzan. This reinforces the theme of blending religious practice with everyday activities, such as playing sports.

💡Offside

'Offside' is a rule in football determining a player's position in relation to the opposing team. The speaker jokes that they don’t care about the offside rule but are more concerned about the 'batas suci' or sacred boundary, again satirizing how religious concepts mix with sports in the narrative.

Highlights

A comedian mentions how commentators are objective, always stating what's happening on the field, unlike in other professions.

The comedian humorously references how commentators exaggerate near-goals and misrepresent moments.

A funny comment about a football commentator describing a player running and asking for the ball, only to reveal the player was a substitute.

A joke is made about how watching too many cartoons, especially 'Tsubasa,' could affect a commentator's analysis of real football.

The comedian reflects on his experience playing futsal during his time at a pesantren (Islamic school), mentioning how his coach, an ustad, provided calm commentary.

The ustad's humorous football commentary included religious phrases like 'Subhanallah' while players dribbled past opponents.

The comedian recalls how, in futsal, the players wore jerseys with Arabic letters instead of numbers to avoid showing off.

A humorous anecdote where the futsal team all used the name 'Hamba Allah' (Servant of God) on the back of their jerseys to avoid seeking individual praise.

In the futsal games, they didn’t stop playing when hearing a whistle but would stop when hearing the call to prayer (adhan).

A joke about how they ignored the offside rule because they cared more about staying within the sacred boundary.

A reflection on how sports, especially futsal in their context, should be fun and entertaining, providing a source of enjoyment.

The comedian playfully brings up his experience leading an exercise class for mothers and making it light-hearted, like an entertainment show.

He humorously describes how, during the exercise class, he joked about avoiding dangerous items like a razor (Silet) on the floor.

The comedian praises one of his peers for delivering the best material of the day, suggesting it had the most impact.

In a light-hearted conclusion, the comedian comments on how enjoyable the event was, highlighting the overall fun and entertainment.

Transcripts

yo yah yah kita punya satu orang komik

lagi yang hanya sebagai Abdul tangkis

gua jago dalam menangisku batu macam hal

tonikum Bagaimana kabarmu harga helm

masih perut gue ya orang yang paling

objektif itu adalah komentator bola

Kenapa karena komentator bola itu selalu

mengutarakan apa yang terjadi dilapangan

lunak penari akan ada komentator

komentator bola yang bohong itu yang

terlihat pemain Malaysia mendekati

gawang Indonesia diundang doang hampir

gol padahal gol kemenangan atau

komentator bola ngomongin dia kita lihat

dia berlari mintabola mengangkat tangan

overlapping tapi tidak dikasih kasih dan

ternyata dia adalah pemain cadangan

Saint kalau menurut komentator bola itu

juga enggak boleh terlalu sering nonton

film kartun apalagi kartun Tsubasa

karena itu akan mempengaruhi komentar ya

Eh kaga liat ayo lihat semua Kapan kita

datang seluruh penjuru kota Puji

kehebatannya dan gue jujur egonya

lulusan pesantren dan gua-gua pesantren

di daerah Banten enam tahun dan gua itu

dulu dipesan minggu itu ada ekskul

futsal dan gue ikut futsal dan waktu

main futsal itu jadi komentatornya tuh

ustad gua itu saat gue tuh kalau

komentator itu jadi adem gitu geregetan

adem ya clean Dzawin membobol aja dibawa

dibawa dibawa Subhanallah dribble yang

sangat cantik hehehe hehehe cek lihat

jawaban membobol aja satu lawan dilewati

ya satu orang tertipu dua orang tertipu

orang tertipu Astagfirullah Jangan

bohong ya masih Win masih jauh tentang

dan gosokin juga melakukan selebrasi dia

tidak mau dipuji takut Riya uh dan gua

itu dulu ya waktu mens futsal main bola

main futsal ke pesantren itu kita kita

kompak kita pakai kostum bola uh nomor

punggungnya pakai hijaiyah dan karena

kita nggak mau dipuji karena kita nggak

mau dipuji jadi nama punggungnya

Semuanya sama Jadi kalau adanya eh

kemarin tak suara siapa hamba Allah

emang dia ngegolin berapa emang dia

ngobrolin berapa tujuh setengah tadinya

10214 zakat

Hai Ken kita itu ya dulu itu kita waktu

main bola itu main bola main futsal itu

kita main bolanya lebih Syariah Jadi

kita kalau beda sama pemain bola pemain

bola yang konvensional kalau pemain bola

yang biasa kendang munculnya Wow kita

beda kita Nugini sama Tapi bolanya ke

kiblat uh denger Pluit bodo amat denger

adzan Baru berhenti dan kita enggak

pernah dan kita nggak pernah peduli sama

garis offside karena kita lebih peduli

sama batas suci teletong kasih kalau

kalau sebenarnya sport itu The Spot

dalam bahasa Inggris dalam kamus Oxford

itu artinya adalah sosok Entertainment

itu sumber hiburan makanya olahraga itu

memang seharusnya menyenangkan dan

menghibur kita di senam ini boleh

membawa ini pas banget gua di

belakangnya seger Eh tapi lu Tong

dulu bahkan itupun ngebawain acara senam

itu tanggal yang buat ibu ya semuanya Ya

pemirsa ibu-ibu semuanya diangkat

kakinya ke depan blakang buka kiri

penutup coba kamu Bawain Bawain acaranya

itu sambil kayak dia waktu ngebawain

acara infotainmen pemirsa diangkat

kakinya kedepan kebelakang tapi jangan

ke kiri karena di lantai sebelah kiri

ada Silet Terima kasih God awet ya jamin

kamu disana bermain bukan hanya rileks

nyata kamu sudah menikmati betul kompor

gas dari terima kasih orang Iya kawin

tapi menurut gue sih diantara yang lain

yang keren-keren materinya hari ini buat

gue materiil yang paling keren gitu ya

itu aja Zapin keren buat kamu kasih wa

durasi wajah wes software huhuhu

huhuhu huhuhu