Study yourself to become confident
Summary
TLDRIn this empowering video, Liz encourages viewers to unlock their ultimate confidence by understanding and embracing their authentic selves. She discusses the importance of self-awareness, setting boundaries, and living according to one's own values. Liz emphasizes the significance of changing negative self-perceptions, acting with intention rather than reacting to life, and recognizing non-negotiables in relationships. She also touches on the impact of societal norms on self-image and the healing power of acknowledging and releasing pent-up emotions. By taking responsibility for one's life and not being addicted to past suffering, Liz inspires viewers to live a life of freedom and self-respect.
Takeaways
- 🌟 Self-awareness is crucial for personal growth; understanding your likes, dislikes, and boundaries is key to authentic living.
- 🙏 Gratitude towards sponsors like BetterHelp for providing online therapy platforms that facilitate access to professional help from the comfort of home.
- 🤔 The concept of 'self' is often shaped by societal influences and can be changed to align with one's authentic self.
- 🗣️ Changing self-talk is vital; it can transform ingrained beliefs formed during childhood and promote a healthier self-image.
- 💔 Acknowledging and challenging societal beauty standards can help individuals develop a more positive and personal perception of beauty.
- 💡 The importance of distinguishing between acting and reacting in life; making conscious decisions leads to increased confidence.
- 🚫 Identifying non-negotiables in life, such as loyalty in relationships, sets clear boundaries and fosters self-respect.
- 💞 Recognizing the transformative power of a woman's decision to leave an unhealthy situation and the strength that follows.
- 🧠 The impact of society on dopamine receptors and the potential dangers of substance abuse as a means to seek excitement.
- 🔍 Understanding personal triggers and their origins can lead to healing and improved relationships with others.
- 🔄 The significance of recognizing and breaking repetitive patterns in life that may stem from unresolved past issues.
- 🤝 Taking responsibility for one's life and refusing to be a victim of circumstances leads to empowerment and success.
- 🚫 Avoiding addiction to suffering and drama, and the importance of creating a peaceful and calm personal reality.
- 🌱 Surrounding oneself with people who positively influence and energize can significantly impact one's mood and outlook on life.
- 📚 The value of learning from books, people, and experiences as they provide insights and lessons tailored to individual perspectives.
- 💡 Living in the present moment, appreciating what one has, and using current resources to create a fulfilling future.
- 👤 Understanding that others' opinions are beyond one's control and focusing on personal authenticity over external validation.
- 💪 Believing in oneself and one's worth, irrespective of what others say, is a powerful tool for personal empowerment and achieving goals.
Q & A
What is the key to unlocking ultimate confidence according to the speaker?
-The key to unlocking ultimate confidence is to get to know who you are, understand what you like and dislike, and accept what you will and won't accept. It involves studying oneself and one's behaviors.
What is the role of BetterHelp as mentioned in the script?
-BetterHelp is an online therapy platform that provides access to over 30,000 therapists. It offers a service where individuals can fill out a questionnaire to assess their needs and get matched with a therapist, allowing for video, phone, or message-based sessions from the comfort of their own home.
What does the speaker suggest about societal structures and the concept of 'self'?
-The speaker suggests that societal structures, such as beauty standards and job acceptance, influence our concept of 'self'. However, since there is no inherent 'self', we have the freedom to change and become who we feel is most authentic and makes us happiest.
How does the speaker recommend changing self-perception?
-The speaker recommends changing self-perception by changing the way one talks to oneself. This involves reaffirming positive beliefs and challenging negative beliefs that were formed during childhood due to external influences.
What is the importance of understanding one's triggers according to the script?
-Understanding one's triggers is important because it helps individuals realize that they are not 'crazy' or bad, but are acting out of past wounds. This understanding can lead to healing and a more authentic life.
What does the speaker suggest regarding the concept of 'non-negotiables' in life?
-The speaker suggests that having clear 'non-negotiables' helps individuals to feel more confident and respected by others. These are boundaries that one will not compromise on, such as loyalty in a relationship or respectful treatment in the workplace.
How does the speaker describe the process of taking responsibility for one's life?
-The speaker describes taking responsibility for one's life as a powerful act that allows individuals to have control over their life and not succumb to past abuses or negative influences. It involves refusing to be a victim and working on becoming the best version of oneself.
What is the significance of surrounding oneself with the right people according to the script?
-Surrounding oneself with the right people is significant because it can influence one's energy, mood, and perspective on life. The speaker emphasizes the importance of choosing friends who align with one's values and contribute positively to one's life.
What advice does the speaker give about living in the present moment?
-The speaker advises living in the present moment to appreciate life more and reduce anxiety and stress. By focusing on what can be done now and acknowledging the present, one can create a better future.
How does the speaker view the importance of believing in oneself?
-The speaker views believing in oneself as a crucial step in connecting with oneself and unlocking one's potential. It involves affirming one's worth and desires, and not allowing others' opinions to define one's self-worth or capabilities.
What is the speaker's perspective on the impact of external opinions on one's life?
-The speaker's perspective is that external opinions should not dictate one's life. Accepting that one cannot control others' thoughts allows for a more authentic and worry-free existence.
Outlines
🔑 Discovering Self-Authenticity and Confidence
The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and understanding one's likes, dislikes, and boundaries as the key to unlocking ultimate confidence. They introduce BetterHelp, an online therapy platform with over 30,000 therapists, as a resource for gaining unbiased advice on personal issues. BetterHelp offers the flexibility to switch therapists at no additional cost, which is a unique feature compared to traditional therapy. The platform allows users to fill out a questionnaire to assess their needs and get matched with a therapist for various types of sessions, all from the comfort of home. The speaker, Liz, also discusses the concept of self and how societal structures and perceptions can influence our self-image, advocating for the change of internal dialogue to align with one's authentic self.
🌟 Embracing Change and Setting Personal Boundaries
Liz delves into the idea that there is no fixed 'self,' and our identities are shaped by external influences. She encourages viewers to change their self-talk to foster a positive self-image and to establish non-negotiables in various aspects of life, such as relationships and work, to build confidence. Liz shares her personal experience with therapy, highlighting its role in understanding triggers and promoting personal growth. She stresses the importance of acknowledging feelings and emotions without judgment and recognizing patterns in life that may indicate areas for healing and change.
💪 Taking Responsibility for Personal Growth
The speaker discusses the significance of taking responsibility for one's life and not becoming a victim of past circumstances. She shares her journey of overcoming an abusive past and emphasizes the power of not blaming others for one's situation. Liz encourages breaking the cycle of repeating negative patterns and taking control of one's destiny. She also touches on the concept of not becoming addicted to suffering and the importance of surrounding oneself with positive influences that contribute to personal well-being.
🤗 Choosing Positive Relationships and Influences
Liz talks about the impact of the people we surround ourselves with and the importance of selecting friends who have a positive and reciprocal energy exchange. She reflects on her past experiences with a partner who was emotionally draining and contrasts it with the uplifting energy she receives from friends and family. The speaker advises viewers to be mindful of the company they keep, as it can shape their lifestyle and energy, and to seek out relationships that align with their personal values and aspirations.
📚 Learning from Life's Messages and Signs
The speaker encourages viewers to be attentive to the messages and signs in life, whether they come from books, people, or experiences. Liz shares an encounter with a person who helped her understand her avoidant attachment style and how this knowledge can lead to personal growth and change. She suggests self-reflection through writing down one's thoughts and feelings about various aspects of life to gain clarity on one's identity. Liz also emphasizes the importance of living in the present moment and not being preoccupied with the future, as this can lead to a more fulfilling and appreciative life.
🚀 Believing in Oneself and Living Authentically
In the final paragraph, Liz stresses the importance of self-belief and not being swayed by others' opinions or criticisms. She advocates for living authentically and embracing one's individuality without fear of judgment. The speaker shares her philosophy on freedom and the determination to not let anyone take it away. Liz concludes by inspiring viewers to believe in their worth and potential, to make decisions for themselves, and to live life on their own terms.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Authentic Self
💡BetterHelp
💡Therapist
💡Non-negotiables
💡Self-worth
💡Dopamine Receptors
💡Accountability
💡Healing
💡Self-respect
💡Attachment Style
💡Living in the Now
💡Self-belief
Highlights
Unlocking ultimate confidence involves self-discovery and understanding personal likes, dislikes, and acceptances.
BetterHelp is an online therapy platform with over 30,000 therapists offering unbiased advice on various issues.
The ability to switch therapists on BetterHelp without additional charges is a unique feature not commonly found in traditional therapy settings.
The concept of 'no self' suggests that our identities are shaped by societal influences and can be changed to become more authentic.
Changing self-talk is crucial for personal development and overcoming negative beliefs instilled in childhood.
Beauty standards are subjective and can be redefined by personal affirmation to foster self-confidence.
Authenticity in life involves acting rather than reacting, which leads to increased confidence and self-respect.
Establishing non-negotiables in relationships and life helps maintain boundaries and self-worth.
The societal normalization of drinking and substance use can lead to addiction and depleted dopamine receptors.
Understanding personal triggers can lead to healing by recognizing past wounds and changing reactions.
Therapy can be instrumental in taking accountability for one's actions and fostering personal change.
Acknowledging feelings and avoiding suppression can prevent physical and emotional illness.
Recognizing and breaking repetitive patterns in life can lead to healing and personal growth.
Taking responsibility for one's life and refusing to be a victim leads to empowerment and success.
Avoiding addiction to suffering and drama is essential for personal well-being and moving forward.
Surrounding oneself with the right people who provide positive energy and support is crucial for personal development.
Living in the present and appreciating the 'now' can reduce anxiety and increase life fulfillment.
Believing in oneself and one's worth is a key component of self-connection and unlocking personal potential.
Opinions of others are irrelevant to one's self-worth and should not dictate personal actions or beliefs.
Transcripts
listen if you want to unlock Ultimate
confidence if you want to feel like your
authentic self and vibrate on the
highest level you need to get to know
who you are you need to get to know what
you like what you don't like what you
accept what you will not accept this is
the whole key the biggest thing in life
that you should study is you is your
behaviors it's how you act once you know
who you are no one can tell you anything
want to say a huge thank you for
betterhelp for sponsoring this video
betterhelp is an online therapy platform
with over 30,000 therapists the
therapists are there to give you
unbiased and helpful advice with any
issue that you might be facing there are
so many therapists at your disposal that
you can choose from and if you don't
like the therapist that you are matched
up with better help gives you the option
to switch therapist with no additional
charge which in real life honestly that
would not happen so if you don't know
where to begin to find a therapist or
where to even look at and you don't want
to leave your house better help is the
best platform for that because it's all
out of the comfort of your own home you
can just browse and look at different
options to get start you fill out a
questionnaire to help assess your
specific needs and then you'll get
matched with a therapist in as little as
a few days you can schedule video phone
or message based sessions whatever you
are most comfortable with so let better
help connect you with a therapist all
out of the comfort of your own home you
can do this by visiting the link in
description or betterhelp.com
wizardz what you can also do is click on
Wizard Liz during sign up and you will
enjoy a special discount with your first
month hi guys my name is Liz and welcome
back to my channel okay let's get into
it first things first need you to
realize is that there is no self so what
you are right now is just made of
beliefs by your parents by the people
around you by your friends Society
whatever right I think a lot of times if
for example beauty standards if they
weren't there a lot of people wouldn't
look how they look right now because
there there's nothing to look up to or
to follow a lot of people wouldn't do
certain jobs because it's it's not like
oh that's accepted in society and that
other job is shamed in society like made
up in a societal structure that we
follow unconsciously and consciously
what I love about that is that when
there is no self we can also change it
and we can become who we feel is most
authentic and makes us the most happy
and how we do that is by first of all
changing the way you talk to yourself
see your whole life your parents have
told you things about yourself your
friends have told you things about
yourself and in childhood you adapted
those traits as who you are so for
example when I was very young I was told
that I wasn't smart okay by one of my
Abus parents like you're not smart
whatever shut up blah blah a woman
should never talk and then I started to
now even in adulthood I doubt my
intelligence because of what I was told
in childhood but now I reaffirm to
myself no you are smart you know so much
you have so much knowledge and I
reaffirmed that to myself to change
those beliefs because I want to control
what I believe and I want to shape who I
am to myself the same way when you were
younger and someone told you you're not
beautiful you're not good-looking later
in life you will always remember that
unconsciously and you be like insecure
about your looks or think like oh this
is not good enough and all these things
you can tell yourself right now that you
are you can look at yourself right now
and be like you are the most gorgeous
hottest thing on earth like wow when I
look at you I am mesmerized you can tell
yourself these things and even when you
say like oh no I don't believe it I
don't want to say it why don't you
believe it beauty is a madeup societal
structure right for a lot of people
people that are even considered
beautiful let's say to you are not
beautiful to other people you know you
know how many times I heard that I'm not
good-looking and all these things and I
see why they think that because it's
their perception and I'm probably not
their type and I don't care to be their
type but does that mean that I when I
look in the mirror I have to say that to
myself or I have to say their
affirmation of their perception of me to
myself no I can create my own perception
my own world my own character of who I
am another thing you should ask yourself
is are you acting or are you reacting to
life so I actually had this conversation
with my therapist and she was like Liz
you are very sensitive so whenever
someone comes up to you and asks you
like let's say let's go for a coffee
let's go on a date whatever she's like
because you're so sensitive you might
think in your head like H you know what
yeah let's go let's see what where it
takes me and maybe this is the person
but she's like you should start acting
and you should like connect to your
heart and think to yourself is this what
I want H that moment you should really
ask yourself am I saying yes to this
thing or to this invitation because I
really want to go or am I scared to
disappoint people do I feel bad for them
and that's why I'm saying yes when you
know that when you're saying yes it's
authentic to what you want to do you'll
become more confident when you know that
when you're saying no it's authentic to
what you want to do you'll become
confident because you are living in
accordance to your own voice another
thing is think about what are your
non-negotiables so let's say for example
for me in a relationship if my partner
is not loyal that's it my partner knows
and I know I will not stay there and I
will not take this relationship
seriously anymore that's my
non-negotiable I do not budge on that I
stand on it I do not care why let's say
there is a couple right and they both
decide okay we're going to be loyal
we're going to be in a trusting
relationship when one of that person
breaks that trust it's traumatizing for
that other person because now they're
going to take that on to their next
relationship and start to distrust other
people because it's like a sudden shock
and I don't think people realize how
cheating is a big trauma for a person
for example in work you can think about
okay if the boss is making rude comments
whatever is that you're non-negotiable
are you thinking no I will not accept
that we cannot compromise on this I will
leave the more you have your
non-negotiables clear for you and you
know that this I will accept this I
won't accept and you stand on those
boundaries that is the more you will
feel confident about yourself and the
people around you will also start to
respect you more a person that says if
you cheat on me and and I discover that
and they leave that is a
person that is forever will be respected
okay even by the other person because no
matter what they do they can cry they
can they can they can beg they can do
anything for them but this person has so
much selfworth has so much much boundary
know there's one thing about women that
I've
noticed doesn't matter how long she
stayed with you doesn't matter how many
years she put up with things once a
woman in her head makes that switch of
this is not what I want anymore she can
even have stayed there for 25 years in
this relationship okay once she knows in
her head this is not what I want anymore
I will not accept any further than this
you can go take a hike this woman will
not come back to you once a woman knows
in her head you're not that person
anymore she will not even be able to
look at you the same it will never ever
come back I respect that so much I
respect it like no no matter how many
years it took no matter whatever it took
for you to leave once a woman leaves she
will boss up you will never recognize
her anymore all the pain you put her
through doesn't matter this woman will
always come out on top we live in a
society where our dopamine receptors in
the brain are very worn out and that's
dangerous when that happens because when
your dopamine receptors are worn out
nothing becomes exciting anymore so
people go to the extreme to feel a
certain sense of excitement you can see
this for example with people that from a
very young age started drinking because
alcoholism is so normal in this world
and it's almost pushed upon everyone you
know and I feel like because they
normalize this later on because they've
been drinking for so long they start to
use like heavier substances and then
later on these substances also don't do
anything anymore so now you have a lot
of people that are addicted since they
were teenager and somehow we're all
normalizing this their dopamine
receptors are completely worn out and
they're depressed and don't feel any
excitement anymore for anything in the
world also look at what is triggering
you and where is that coming from when I
was younger in school I used to hate
when teachers would tell me what to do
and I would never even take it seriously
why because at home I was constantly
controlled I wasn't allowed to have a
voice so the only thing I've ever wanted
was freedom to speak my mind and to say
what I want and just to be free okay so
when at school I was also controlled
that would trigger me but but that was
triggering the wound that I had back
home
and I needed to realize these things so
I could stop acting in a way and hurting
other people that had nothing to do with
it I had to go back to the base of where
is this coming from so I could work on
that and that I could live in a way
where I can respect others and honestly
therapy has helped me a lot with that
because when I was when I talked to my
therapists it was always about okay Liz
where are you going wrong what are you
doing that these situations keep
happening again so that we can fix it
and actually change your life instead of
because people often think that
therapists sit there and will just
listen to you and act like you're good
and that's it no they will make you take
accountability and change your life I
think what is also so important about
understanding your triggers is that it
makes you understand that you're not
crazy it makes you understand that
you're not a bad person but you're just
acting out of past wounds and I think
that's beautiful I think that's putting
sanity inside of your mind and being
like you know what I'm not an aggressive
person I'm just hurt and I've been hurt
so many times that the only way my body
is reacting right now is out of
aggression because the moments that I
was hurt I couldn't speak up for myself
or I didn't say it so this is all P pent
up anger and resentment that's coming
out as an aggressive person but that
doesn't have to be me that doesn't have
to Define me and you can change that
when you understand where it's coming
from it's good to acknowledge your
feelings I think the way people can heal
is when they are in touch with their
feelings and emotions and when they
don't demonize it the reason why you're
sad is because you're hurt it's not
because you're weak it's not because oh
you're not strong enough to handle it no
something hurt you and it's okay to cry
it out because that's how you release
whatever has hurt you but if you hold it
in people get physically ill from this
people even die from illnesses by
holding on to this pent up anger
resentment and stress release it if it's
crying for months release it that's the
way you release okay whatever you have
to do in whatever way release it if it's
talking about it constantly over and
over again until you're done talking
about then do that do that I've told the
same stories maybe 100 times but now I'm
done telling those stories because it's
out of my system thing is look at the
patterns in your life that are repeating
itself over and over again because that
is teaching you where your healing lies
okay I've had multiple patterns repeat
I've had my uh father in my life that
was abusive and then I attracted my ex
partner that was exactly a replica of my
father in the beginning it was great and
then it turned out to be he's just like
my dad okay now why was this pattern
coming up because I still had not come
to terms with what happened with my
father so it came back to me in a
relationship form so I can see it in
front of myself and I almost felt like I
was recreating my mother's and father's
relationship with my ex partner and when
I understood that and I was like wow but
this is not what I want cuz if I have a
child she will just be a little Liz
again with the same traumas I don't want
that for my child so that's when I said
you know what no I don't want to
continue this I want to stop the cycle
of the same patterns happening again
even in friendships even in
relationships look at these people and
ask yourself are they repeating
themselves over and over again am I
experiencing the same thing over and
over again then start thinking okay what
is my lesson
here why am I attracting the constant
same person over and over again and you
should instead of blaming take
responsibility for your life okay I in
my my life it's very easy to say you
know what my life is [ __ ] because I had
an abusive father no I took
responsibility for my life I could have
blamed him all day but it doesn't matter
now does it cuz it's in the past what I
did with my life afterwards was all up
to me and because I took the
responsibility and I was like Liz you
know what you're going to work on
yourself you're going to become the best
version of yourself you're going to
become one of the strongest adults
you've ever seen that's going to protect
your inner child when I did that that's
when I became
successful that's when I had everything
because I refused I refused to just
succumb to the abuse to just be like
it's your fault and I'm going to be the
victim here I was never the victim I was
never the victim I was always going to
be the person that was going to come out
on top no matter what in any situation
in any situation you put me in I will
come out on top no matter what
responsibility gives you the power over
your life life and blame takes it away
blame gives that abuser or that person
that was bad to you or whatever they did
to that gives them power but you have
that power when you take responsibility
and I like you know what whatever you
did to me how many times you lied to me
how many times you cheated I am still
going to come out on top when you do
that you
win you win and don't become addicted to
your suffering a lot of you guys are so
addicted to feeling that sensation ation
of that stress again a lot of people
around me even that also come from
abusive childhood they act constant new
drama they create for themselves
constantly because that's the only thing
they knew and that's what they're kind
of addicted to that feeling of that Rush
again that drama again but don't don't
become addicted to it have some you know
what start to realize I'm not that
person anymore I'm not that abused child
I'm not that that that that person that
was cheated on I'm not that person
anymore I'm a different person now I
don't need to create those situations
again for myself I don't need to fight
like I used to my life is calm now my
life is peaceful and start to make that
your reality say like you know what now
I have a good life I'm I have a great
life actually you know start to say that
to yourself and start to acknowledge
that that's the past what has happened
has happened that doesn't Define me
today that's not who I am today and you
guys are not going to treat me like
that's who who I am today also start to
realize that who feeds you and who takes
from you okay so when I was a lot around
my previous partner I started to think
I'm depressed I'm depressed I'm sad like
I'm always sad I'm isolated this is who
I am that's what I constantly thought
but why did I think that because I
didn't have any friends or family around
me so I was alone with this person
constantly so they could just make my
mind in whoever they wanted to be and I
started to believe that this is just who
I I am but the minute I came and I
visited my family I reconnected with old
friends I realized I feel alive around
these people I feel like I want to live
and that's something that I haven't felt
in a very very long time because my
previous partner was just taking from me
taking taking taking and leaving me
empty but when I'm here now I'm starting
to realize it's an equal give and
exchange I don't feel sleepy around
these people I don't feel drained I
don't feel like I want to take my life I
feel like I want to live so when I
understood the difference and after that
I even think about like oh my previous
partner I'm like no I don't want to ever
do that again because I never want to
feel how I felt how bad I felt I want to
continue being around people who I can
give to and that give me the same way
back in an energetical sense always feel
it you will feel it when you feel
fulfilled when you come home from
someone let's say a friend and you feel
like oh my God I need to sleep for 10
days now that person has drained you
that's not your person you should feel
like oh my God I have so much energy you
know I I reconnected with this old
friend of mine and whenever I'm around
her I don't even need sleep we can go on
for days and days and days and we just
have fun so Choose Wisely who you
surround yourself with because that will
also shape who you
become I recently have been meeting a
lot of people and I came from isolation
to meeting a lot of people and I'm
starting to realize okay I want to hang
out with you but I wouldn't hang out
with you not because they're a bad
person but because their lifestyle
doesn't align with what I would want in
my life for example I've noticed that a
lot of people have alcohol addiction a
lot of people have substance addiction
especially now in this world and in the
age that we live in and I was looking at
that and they they party constantly and
all these things and I was thinking like
M you know if I become friends with you
like really close friends and we go out
and stuff I don't want that to become my
life because I can see how it would
distract me from my work and my purpose
in this world and I feel like I would
just get lost you know so I then choose
my friends like for example that old
friend I that I reconnected with she has
the same morals as me that's the same
kind of vibration I'm on if you choose
people that constantly like that aren't
really connected to them elves and want
to escape from reality because that's
what I truly think that alcohol subtance
all these things are you just don't want
to face reality you don't want to face
yourself so if you surround yourself
with people that constantly party do
that and I want to escape reality you'll
become the other person as well and
eventually you'll feel like you're
losing
yourself nothing in excess is good too
much of anything is bad for you think in
the long run if you hang out with people
you just become them you can even see
that physically
best friends and stuff they start to
look alike their Aura your aura gets
mixed and your energy get mixed if you
look at this person you think hm I would
not want to be like them I would not
want to live the way they live then
that's not your person and then you
choose people that do align to your
lifestyle and who you want to be also
start looking at what are people what
are books what are TV shows songs
teaching
you everywhere we look we have m
messages we have signs and it's almost
like God and the universe is constantly
talking to us but it's for us to really
open our eyes and look at the signs okay
so for example if you read a book right
now and if I read a book I will see that
book in my perspective and I will take
from that book what was important for me
and in my world you had a whole
different lesson from that book what was
important for you and your life and your
perspect perspective right that's how we
get those signs also like people that
come up to you like I recently met this
guy in the weirdest way possible such a
Divine thing okay he taught me a lot
about myself he was he taught me about
my attachment style in relationships and
he was like Liz you have avoidant
attachment style and I was like whoa
what is that and explain to me and it's
basically that when a person feels more
safe
alone they will like be in relationships
but they will never want to fully commit
and that's what I have so I will if
someone brings up marriage to me I get
scared okay I'm like no no I don't want
to do that but it's because in my head I
feel most safe when I'm alone because I
didn't have people around me when I was
younger that I could trust so when I
felt safe was when Liz was alone in her
room that's when I felt safe so I
constantly go back to that I never even
thought about my attachment style
because what I constantly ract are
anxious attachment people so these are
people that are have abandonment issues
they afraid of getting rejected they're
afraid of getting abandoned and because
of that trauma they get obsessed with me
because I kind of reject them I kind of
always hold this distance you know but
both of us are acting out of a trauma
response that was so interesting when
that person told all of this to me
because I was starting to realize when I
was meeting more people like I don't
like how they become so almost obsessed
or controlling over me immediately and
then I started to realize but I'm
attracting anxious people that all have
rejection wounds that have abandonment
wounds and because of the way I act with
with which is in a rejecting way they
become obsessed not because I'm a great
person but because I'm their trauma and
when I realize this I'm like oh my God
I'm I'm going to have to start to work
on my own issues so I won't attract
these people anymore because it's scary
but look how this person came into my
life to teach me that and for me to
change that you can also do is take a
paper and write down okay who am I what
do I love what don't I love what do I do
for fun what are my hobbies what were my
hobbies when I was younger how do I want
people to treat me how do I think that I
treat people these are all questions you
can write down and ask yourself and
you'll have all the answers you'll have
like this little example of who you are
as a person another thing is living in
the now and this is something my sister
has told me so many times lately because
I was like oh Sabina but I I want to
achieve this oh Saina in a month I'm
going to do this and she constantly
reminds me Liz live in the now just
think about now live your life right now
look at around you live now and
constantly because I'm reminded of that
I feel like I appreciate life more and
I'm not running from it I feel like my
my whole life I've just been running and
going to the next thing and that's why
I've never felt fulfilled by anything
because I'm not acknowledging it you
know I'm not acknowledging it yeah okay
I went viral I went viral on YouTube
amazing people would have thrown a party
because of it I was just like no what's
next what's next what's next that's why
I never realized what was happening
because I was never living in the now I
was always living in the future that's
how anxiety comes up that's how you have
more stress because you're constantly
thinking about the future but if if you
think right now what can I do now what
what I have what tools can I use and
what can I create now that's when you
create the future cuz the future doesn't
exist right past also doesn't exist what
we have is now when you don't appreciate
now nothing else will flourish good to
have goals but don't live for it don't
live for the future don't become a slave
of the future what people think about
you is none of your business people can
think whatever they want okay when you
put something out there when you create
something you will always attract people
on your vibration or that are meant to
see whatever you put out whether it's
positive or whether it's negative they
were meant to see what you put out there
you just have to create that's it all of
the rest doesn't matter because it's not
your business you will never control
their mind you will never control how
they think and that's just why would you
want to be in someone El's head be in
your own head think about your own stuff
why are you there be here be present
again once you start to realize that
what others think about you is none of
your business and whether you are the
best person on Earth they will not like
you still you can be the most PG nice
person ever and people will still have
something bad to say about you when you
accept that when you accept that you
know what criticism I love it it's a
part of life you have the good you have
the bad and it's beautiful both ways
when you accept that you live like
yourself authentically you're you don't
have any fear because you don't have
anything to to worry about I don't have
to why would I worry about millions of
people's brains why I don't have time
for that so I just put myself stff out
there and what what you think of it it's
up to you but somewhere you saw that
video of me because you needed that
whether it hurt you or whether it helped
you you needed that last but not least I
think believing in yourself is one of
the highest
ways of connecting with yourself you
know when everyone tells you like oh no
you don't deserve to have that you don't
deserve to have this and you tell
yourself but I do I want whatever I want
in life if I want to have the best life
and if I want to say let's live like a
queen and I want to be treated like a
queen I can have that and who is anyone
to say that I don't deserve that lots of
people have it it exists in this world
whatever exists I can have as well start
to say that to yourself when you're like
you know I want to be the most confident
beautiful amazing smart person that I am
that's it that's how fast life will
change for you because you decided that
for yourself that's who you want to be
and that's who you already are so you
start unlocking that version of you if
you listen to no you shouldn't be living
like that no you shouldn't have this no
you shouldn't when you listen to that it
will Cloud your mind it will start to be
like oh my God no they told me I was not
deserving of a good life so now I won't
have a good life but what are you a
slave what are you a SL slave to these
people no really start thinking to
yourself am I a slave or am I a free
spirit am I a free soul that came to
this earth to live my best life possible
and to help and create in this earth the
best way possible really one thing in
life that I've always valued because I
didn't have it was freedom and I'll be
damned if someone ever takes that away
from me again anyways guys I hope you
enjoyed this video I hope you learned
something from the this video and yeah I
see you in the next video bye-bye love
you
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