What to do when my Autistic child has a meltdown

Summary

In this heartfelt video, the speaker discusses the complexities of managing autistic meltdowns, emphasizing the difference between tantrums and meltdowns. Drawing from personal experience with her son, Dylan, she shares strategies for recognizing early signs, de-escalating situations, and offering support during a meltdown. The speaker stresses the importance of patience, understanding, and creating a safe environment for the child while also considering the needs of siblings. She encourages open communication with children and the community, highlighting the emotional toll on parents while offering a message of resilience and hope.

Takeaways

• 😀 Meltdowns in autistic individuals are more complex than regular tantrums and are often triggered by anxiety, overstimulation, or changes in routine.
• 😀 It's important for parents to understand their child's specific triggers and develop strategies to calm them down before the meltdown escalates.
• 😀 The first step during a meltdown is to ignore outside judgment and focus on the child, as people may misinterpret the situation.
• 😀 Ensuring safety is crucial during a meltdown; parents should guide their children to a safe space and prevent self-harm.
• 😀 Reassuring words like 'Mommy’s here' can help calm the child, but avoid trying to reason or talk during the meltdown itself.
• 😀 Parents should never discipline a child for having a meltdown, as the child is often out of control and scared in that moment.
• 😀 Understanding and empathizing with the child during a meltdown can help them feel supported and reduce anxiety.
• 😀 For older children, it’s important to give them space while still being present, as their meltdowns may be more physically intense.
• 😀 Siblings of children with autism may feel confused or upset by the meltdowns, so it's essential to check in with them and provide reassurance.
• 😀 It's beneficial for parents to take care of themselves, emotionally and physically, after a meltdown, and seek support from their community if needed.
• 😀 Sharing experiences and advice with other parents and the autistic community can help everyone learn better ways to cope with meltdowns and support their children.

Q & A

What is the main difference between a tantrum and an autistic meltdown?

A tantrum is typically associated with a child expressing frustration over not getting what they want, while an autistic meltdown is a more complex response often triggered by sensory overload, anxiety, or changes in routine. Meltdowns involve a loss of control and can be harder to calm down.

How did the speaker initially misunderstand the nature of their child's meltdowns?

The speaker initially thought their child's meltdowns were just typical two-year-old tantrums. However, they later realized that the meltdowns were more related to sensory overload and emotional distress, which were signs of autism.

What are some common signs that indicate a child might be heading toward a meltdown?

Signs of an impending meltdown can include overstimulation, changes in routine, being in a sensory-triggering environment (like hot or smelly places), or heightened anxiety. It's important for parents to recognize these cues early.

What are some strategies the speaker uses to prevent meltdowns from escalating?

The speaker uses various techniques, such as removing their child from overstimulating situations, offering calming activities like warm baths, and understanding their child's triggers. Building a toolbox of strategies to calm the child before the meltdown intensifies is also essential.

How does the speaker suggest parents should handle meltdowns in public or when others are watching?

The speaker advises ignoring the judgment of others in public, protecting the child, and focusing on keeping them safe. They also suggest not letting people's opinions affect the way parents handle the situation.

What should parents do when their child is in the middle of a meltdown?

During a meltdown, the best approach is to stay calm, ensure the child is in a safe space, and avoid talking to them directly, as they are unlikely to process information. Instead, offer simple and reassuring phrases, like 'Mommy's here,' to provide comfort.

How did the speaker learn to handle meltdowns more effectively over time?

The speaker learned through trial and error, gaining experience by watching their child closely and developing strategies that worked for them. They emphasize the importance of staying calm and letting the storm pass, while offering comfort afterward.

What is the role of other children in the household when one child is having a meltdown?

The speaker ensures the other children are safe and occupied during a meltdown, often by distracting them with activities like movies. It's crucial to protect them from the distressing situation and to check in with them afterward to address any feelings of fear or confusion.

How can parents manage the emotional impact of meltdowns on siblings?

The speaker suggests talking to the siblings after a meltdown, acknowledging their emotions, and providing them with support. It’s important to validate their feelings and ensure they understand that the meltdowns are not the fault of anyone, including them.

Why does the speaker choose not to show their child's meltdowns in videos?

The speaker chooses not to share their child's meltdowns in videos to protect their child’s privacy and dignity. They believe that focusing on positive aspects of autism and showing respect for their child's experience is more helpful than showcasing challenging moments.