Is it Haram for men and women to work together? | Sheikh Assim Al Hakeem -JAL
Summary
TLDRThe speaker addresses the issue of gender interaction in the workplace, emphasizing the Islamic perspective on segregation between men and women. He argues that working closely together can lead to inappropriate interactions over time, even in religious settings. Using examples from Islamic teachings and real-life situations, the speaker stresses the importance of maintaining boundaries and avoiding casual conversations or socializing with the opposite gender. He advises men to remain professional, lower their gaze, and refrain from engaging in small talk or unnecessary interactions to avoid temptation and maintain modesty.
Takeaways
- 😔 It is considered haram in Islam for men and women to work together in mixed environments, based on the Prophet's teachings that promote segregation.
- 🕌 The Prophet emphasized the separation of men and women during prayer, encouraging distance between them as a form of modesty.
- 👀 When men and women work closely, even with the best intentions, it's human nature to become more conscious of appearance and behavior, potentially leading to inappropriate interactions.
- 🚶♂️ The speaker argues that spending long hours together in a mixed-gender environment can lead to relationships beyond a professional scope, even if it starts innocently.
- ⚠️ Shaytan (Satan) is seen as influencing small interactions like sharing food or making small talk, which may lead to stronger personal relationships over time.
- 😅 The speaker shares an experience of seeing men and women working together in a Dawah (Islamic outreach) organization, leading to marriages, but questions how many inappropriate things happened before marriage.
- 🔥 The comparison is made between men and women working together and placing fuel next to fire, suggesting that it’s only a matter of time before inappropriate behavior occurs.
- 🌍 If one must work in a mixed-gender environment due to cultural or professional necessity, strict boundaries should be maintained, including avoiding casual chit-chat or eye contact.
- 🙅♂️ The speaker emphasizes lowering one's gaze and avoiding any socializing, even greeting with a 'good morning,' as a form of boundary-setting.
- 🛑 The speaker believes that trying to be polite or friendly in such environments is risky and may lead to unintended attraction or temptation.
Q & A
What is the speaker's view on men and women working together in the same office?
-The speaker believes it is haram (forbidden) for men and women to work together in close proximity because it can lead to inappropriate relationships and temptations.
Why does the speaker reference the Prophet's teachings regarding the arrangement of men and women during prayer?
-The speaker refers to the Prophet's teachings on prayer to emphasize the importance of segregation between men and women. The Prophet said the best rows for men are at the front, and the best for women are at the back, indicating the need for separation even in religious settings.
What reasoning does the speaker give for men potentially behaving differently around women at work?
-The speaker argues that men may alter their behavior around women by trying to look and act their best, such as trimming their beards, wearing perfume, or being overly polite, which could lead to inappropriate interactions over time.
Why does the speaker criticize even casual interactions between men and women in the workplace?
-The speaker believes that even seemingly innocent interactions, like buying lunch together or being cordial, can lead to inappropriate relationships over time due to human nature and the influence of Shaytan (Satan).
How does the speaker view the example of marriages that resulted from men and women working together?
-The speaker acknowledges that some marriages have occurred from men and women working together but cautions that not all interactions result in marriage and that many may lead to sinful behavior instead.
What is the speaker's stance on maintaining boundaries when working with women in a non-segregated environment?
-The speaker advises maintaining strict boundaries by avoiding chit-chat, socializing, or direct eye contact with women, even at the risk of being seen as rude.
What example does the speaker use to illustrate how powerful individuals can also fall into temptation?
-The speaker references a powerful man, potentially alluding to a former U.S. president, who was tempted by a woman despite his position, to highlight that even the most influential individuals are vulnerable to temptation.
What advice does the speaker give for men working in environments where segregation is not possible?
-The speaker advises men in non-segregated environments to strictly limit their interactions with women, avoid friendly greetings or social conversation, and keep their gaze lowered.
How does the speaker suggest dealing with women who perceive a man’s strict boundaries as rudeness?
-The speaker suggests that it is better for a man to be perceived as rude rather than risk engaging in inappropriate behavior, advising men to focus solely on their work and avoid unnecessary interaction with female colleagues.
What is the overall message the speaker is conveying regarding interactions between men and women at work?
-The overall message is that free mixing between men and women in the workplace is dangerous and can lead to inappropriate relationships, so strict boundaries must be maintained to prevent temptation and sinful behavior.
Outlines
🚫 The Challenge of Gender Mixing in the Workplace
The speaker addresses the issue of intermixing between men and women at the workplace, deeming it haram (forbidden) in Islam. He references a hadith of the Prophet Muhammad, which promotes segregation in prayer as an analogy for workplace interactions. The Prophet emphasized that men should be at the front and women at the back during prayer to minimize interaction. The speaker argues that when men and women work closely, even if professional boundaries are maintained initially, over time, informal relationships may develop. He illustrates this with a hypothetical scenario of small interactions leading to emotional connections. The speaker emphasizes that even innocent gestures, like buying lunch together, can be exploited by shaytan (Satan) to lead people astray, asserting that free mixing is dangerous, even in Islamic organizations.
👁️🗨️ Boundaries in Non-Segregated Workplaces
The speaker discusses what to do if a Muslim must work in a non-segregated environment, particularly in a non-Muslim country or in situations where segregation is impossible. He emphasizes the importance of setting clear boundaries, such as avoiding unnecessary social interactions, not looking directly at women, and refraining from small talk. He advises Muslims to act professionally, even if it means being perceived as rude. The speaker warns that casual interactions, such as greeting coworkers or engaging in friendly conversation, could open the door to inappropriate behavior. He concludes by emphasizing the need for vigilance and discipline in maintaining Islamic conduct at work.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Intermixing
💡Segregation
💡Boundaries
💡Shaytan
💡Islamic guidelines
💡Free mixing
💡Chastity
💡Temptation
💡Cultural differences
💡Dawah organizations
Highlights
The speaker begins by addressing the issue of men and women intermixing in the workplace and confirms that working together is considered haram.
The Prophet's teachings on the separation of men and women during prayer are cited as evidence promoting segregation between men and women in various settings.
The speaker discusses how human nature makes it difficult for men and women to work together without forming personal relationships over time.
The speaker provides an example of how men may adjust their behavior when working with women, such as trimming their beards or wearing perfume.
The speaker suggests that after spending extended periods of time together in a workplace, relationships may develop between men and women, regardless of initial intentions.
An anecdote is shared about the speaker observing free mixing in an Islamic dawah organization, where men and women were working together without partitions.
The speaker emphasizes that free mixing between men and women in the workplace is like placing fuel near a fire, suggesting it will eventually lead to inappropriate behavior.
A comparison is made to powerful figures, stating that even strong men with high positions and beautiful wives can be tempted when working closely with women.
The speaker advises that if someone must work in a mixed environment, they should enforce strict boundaries, such as avoiding small talk, chit-chatting, or socializing.
The speaker emphasizes the importance of not looking directly at women while working and instead focusing solely on job tasks.
The idea that avoiding socializing with female colleagues may be seen as rude is dismissed, with the speaker suggesting it is better to appear rude than to compromise one’s morals.
The speaker warns that flirting and drawing attention to oneself is a natural temptation in a mixed-gender environment, and this must be avoided.
Practical advice is given for men working with women, such as not greeting them with 'Good morning' and avoiding any unnecessary interaction.
The speaker highlights how shaytan (Satan) exploits human weaknesses in mixed environments, encouraging inappropriate behavior over time.
The speaker shares a story of how a dawah organization that initially invited him never invited him again after he criticized their practice of free mixing between men and women.
Transcripts
now um
we mentioned you mentioned this briefly
about the issue about intermixing
between men and women at the workplace
right so how do you advise
us on placing these barriers of
interaction
or maybe let's start with this is it
haram to have men and women
working together
yes that's a short answer
how do you say it is haram well the
prophet alaihis salat was salaam
said to us about actually in islam
which is salah he said
the best role of men is the first
and the worst role of men is the last
and the best role of women is the last
and the worst role of women is the first
what does this tell you it tells you
that the prophet is promoting
the segregation of women in salat so the
best
role is the first for men and it's the
last for women
just to be as far as possible from one
another now when a man
sits with a woman do you think that
he will be respectful and
um chased and doing everything
in his position uh in his power to stay
away
okay if i were to work with a woman i
would
most likely trim my beard i would most
likely
wear my best perfume before i go to work
i would be as gentle as possible
to the extent that my wife says hey
where you going
to work and if i
sit with a woman for eight hours
and she sits with me in the same office
for eight
hours she sits with me more than her
father
and brother and husband and i sit with
her
more than all of that and
i see this everybody knows this maybe
it's not the first week
maybe it's not the first month but after
six seven months of working together
there has to be some form of um
[Music]
relationship so um fatima
sister i don't call her fatima because
there has to be boundaries
i'm going to buy some lunch would you
like some
uh sandwiches oh thank you brother asim
please can i have a chicken sandwich uh
would you like it spicy
no oh yes please i love it when it's hot
what is this
wait wake up oh we're just
buying food i'm just being cordial this
is what shaytan does
bit by bit it happens even in dawa
places i'm not referring to nakwa center
i'm i'm talking about
in general in malaysia i was invited few
years ago
by a dao organization to their
conference
and have the laughter that they've never
invited me again
so i went i went to the offices and i
saw
men and women working in this dawah
islamic organization
in offices together no partition
subhanallah maybe it's the culture and
after five minutes i started hearing
laughing
and joking between the bearded men
and the hijab the women i said
this is weird something is wrong
so i was asking and they said oh yeah we
had couple of marriages here
after working together they got married
yeah this is the halal but how many
did not get married and and happen
things happened
so when i spoke to them
after that they've never invited me
again
this shows you that free mixing it's
bringing fuel
next to the fire and say inshallah
inshallah it would not ignite
this is human nature even the most
powerful man in on earth
supposedly even the most powerful man
who has a beautiful wife
and a strong position the head of the
strongest country in the world was
tempted and seduced by a jew woman
who was an intrin and you say that no no
islam is too extreme
islam is too rigid you always think bad
yeah look what happened yeah so this is
why we say
no try to eliminate it now coming to the
question
if the country you're working in is a
kafir country
or it's a muslim country
but there is no way to work in a
segregated place
you are as a man the breadwinner
you can work with women with boundaries
such as zero chit chatting
zero socializing zero looking
at them straight oh sure they will think
i am rude
yeah you're afraid that they think
you're rude
why don't you kiss them on the cheek in
the morning and before you leave
yes you need to be wake up what are you
crazy
let them think you're rude rather than
try and think that you're doing well
wow so so this is problematic
as it's in our nature to flirt
it's in a nature to show some of
my charm and my power to
crack a joke here and there and to draw
attention
this is what shaytan wants so you have
to work with women
you lower your gaze don't say good
morning
when you come to the office in the
morning don't say hi
good morning nope sit on your desk and
do your job
you need to sign something sign it and
keep your eyes elsewhere
don't socialize don't open a topic
oh you were someone says why didn't you
come yesterday
i was sick don't say may allah
inshallah none of your business
keep it to yourself but this is how
to remind all of you if you have any
pearls of wisdom any brilliant nuggets
of wisdom that you
caught throughout these talks please do
share them at the comment section and
also in your personal social media posts
uh put a hashtag tsp2021 and put a
hashtag be steadfast i've already
uploaded one at least so i'm gonna try
and upload more mashallah a lot of
brilliant points of wisdom so far even
from these two talks masha'allah
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