Being a dusty un chosen weirdo isn’t that bad!
Summary
TLDRIn this introspective video, the creator discusses the unexpected benefits of not being the center of attention or a 'main character.' She candidly shares her personal experiences with loneliness and feeling unchosen, yet finds empowerment in the freedom that comes from having fewer societal expectations to meet. She advocates for detachment from the superficial judgments of others, embracing one's own reality, and finding joy in simply existing. The video encourages viewers to redefine success on their terms and to find strength in their individuality.
Takeaways
- 📢 The video discusses the positive aspects of not being a main character or being 'irrelevant' in social contexts.
- 🔑 The speaker emphasizes that there are benefits to being free from societal expectations and pressures.
- 🏠 The feeling of loneliness is explored, suggesting that it stems from being different and not having a strong support system.
- 💡 The idea is presented that being the 'strongest person in the room' can lead to a sense of isolation, but also to freedom.
- 🤔 The speaker reflects on personal experiences and how they cope with feeling unchosen by family, friends, and the world.
- 🧘♀️ Detachment is highlighted as a coping mechanism, achieved through practices like yoga and walks, to find inner peace.
- 💭 The importance of internal dialogue and living in one's head is mentioned as a way to navigate external negativity.
- 🚫 The speaker rejects societal norms and expectations, choosing to exist on their own terms rather than conform.
- 🌟 The concept of 'yin and yang' is used to illustrate the balance needed in society, where the existence of one group often relies on the existence of its opposite.
- 💪 The video concludes by encouraging viewers to find their own way to be happy and exist freely, regardless of societal acceptance.
- 🤷♀️ The speaker acknowledges the difficulty of their mindset and the judgment they face for not fitting into traditional gender roles or expectations.
Q & A
What is the main theme of the video?
-The main theme of the video is exploring the positive aspects of not being a main character or not being in the spotlight, and how this can lead to a sense of freedom and less pressure.
What does the speaker mean by 'the perks that come with being irrelevant'?
-The speaker is referring to the benefits of not being the center of attention or not having high expectations placed upon oneself, which can lead to less stress and more personal freedom.
What personal experiences does the speaker draw from in the video?
-The speaker draws from her own experiences of feeling lonely and unchosen by her family, friends, and the world, which has led her to develop coping mechanisms and a unique perspective on life.
How does the speaker describe her personality type?
-The speaker describes her personality as logical, straightforward, and blunt, which she feels is similar to a stereotypical male personality and is often judged or not accepted in society.
What coping mechanisms does the speaker mention using to deal with her feelings of loneliness and rejection?
-The speaker mentions using yoga and going on walks as ways to learn detachment and find peace within her own mind, away from the judgments and pressures of the outside world.
What does the speaker mean when she says 'the world is fake'?
-The speaker is expressing her belief that the external world and the opinions of others are not as real or important as one's own thoughts and feelings, which can provide a safe haven.
How does the speaker view the concept of 'popular kids' and 'lame kids'?
-The speaker views the concept as a societal construct where the power and value of popular kids are dependent on the existence of those who are considered less valuable or 'lame', suggesting a need for balance and opposites in society.
What does the speaker suggest is the key to finding happiness despite not being accepted by others?
-The speaker suggests that the key to finding happiness is to detach from the need for others' acceptance, to exist freely, and to find joy in one's own existence without relying on external validation.
Why does the speaker believe that being called 'confident' is ironic?
-The speaker finds it ironic because she is simply existing and being herself, without trying to prove or assert anything. The label of 'confident' is a reflection of societal expectations and the contrast between her natural state and the world's perception.
What advice does the speaker give to those who feel they have nothing and are not accepted?
-The speaker advises that even in the absence of external validation or material possessions, one is still alive and has the ability to find another way to live and be happy, emphasizing the importance of self-acceptance and resilience.
Outlines
😔 Embracing Loneliness: The Perks of Being Unnoticed
The speaker introduces the concept of finding the 'bright side' of not being a main character or someone of significance in the eyes of others. They discuss their personal experiences with loneliness and feeling unchosen by family, friends, and the world. Despite the emotional toll, they highlight the freedom that comes with having no expectations to meet, as fitting in often brings the pressure of fulfilling certain standards. The speaker also touches on their coping mechanisms, such as detaching from the world and finding solace in their own thoughts, which they find more genuine and safe than external interactions.
🧘♀️ Detachment and Self-Acceptance: Finding Inner Peace
The speaker delves into the practice of detachment as a means to cope with societal pressures and judgments. They share their personal journey of learning detachment through yoga and walks, which has helped them find a safe haven in their own mind. The speaker emphasizes the importance of not participating in conversations or situations that do not align with one's values or personality. They also discuss the struggle of being true to oneself in a world that often demands conformity, and the relief found in accepting and embracing one's own identity, even if it is not widely accepted by others.
🚫 Breaking Free from Societal Constructs: The Power of Nonconformity
In this paragraph, the speaker challenges the societal constructs of popularity and acceptance, arguing that these are artificial measures of worth. They discuss the concept of balance and the necessity of contrasting groups for others to feel superior. The speaker rejects the idea of needing validation from others and chooses to exist on their own terms, free from the pressures of fitting into societal norms. They encourage others to find happiness and fulfillment outside of conventional expectations, emphasizing the importance of self-acceptance and the strength found in simply existing.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Main character
💡Perks
💡Loneliness
💡Expectations
💡Detachment
💡Rejection
💡Existence
💡Bullied
💡Yin and Yang
💡Logical
💡Confident
Highlights
The speaker discusses the unexpected benefits of not being a main character or 'irrelevant', suggesting that there are perks to not being in the spotlight.
The video's creator shares personal experiences to cope with feelings of loneliness and the inability to rely on others for support.
A strong person needs someone stronger to protect them, but when you're the strongest in the room, it can lead to a sense of loneliness.
The absence of expectations when nobody cares about you can be liberating, as there's no pressure to meet others' standards.
The speaker describes a mindset of accepting negative labels from others without feeling the need to prove them wrong, embracing a carefree existence.
Being conventionally attractive can be burdensome, as it requires constant effort to maintain that status, whereas embracing one's flaws can lead to freedom.
The speaker emphasizes that what's real is what's in one's head, suggesting that internal dialogue is more meaningful than external interactions.
Detachment from societal expectations and judgments is presented as a way to find safety and sanity in one's own thoughts.
The speaker has learned detachment through practices like yoga and walks, which help in coping with external negativity.
Choosing not to participate in conversations or aspects of the world that are not aligned with one's values is a form of self-preservation.
The speaker's personality, which is logical and straightforward, contrasts with societal expectations for women, leading to a sense of non-acceptance.
The idea of 'taking one's L' (loss) with pride and existing authentically, rather than trying to fit in, is presented as a form of empowerment.
The speaker reflects on the difficulty of being judged for one's personality and appearance, and the decision to stop seeking acceptance.
Detachment is key to avoiding the negative impact of people who cannot understand or appreciate the speaker's mindset.
The concept of balance is introduced, suggesting that for every 'popular' or 'attractive' person, there must be an 'unpopular' or 'unattractive' counterpart.
The speaker argues that by detaching from societal games and not seeking validation, one can find freedom and happiness independently.
The video concludes with the message that not being accepted can lead to less pressure and more freedom to live life on one's own terms.
Transcripts
hey guys
what is up so y'all see the title of the
video
today
we are jumping into
the bright side of not being a main
character the the the perks that comes
with being irrelevant the perks that
comes with nobody caring about you
because there are perks [ __ ]
before we go any further make sure to
subscribe to my channel [ __ ] get me to
100k bye y'all sorry i lied i'm back
listen
this is things that i've done to help me
cope with my own personal experience i'm
not a professional anything do you know
what personal experience means go look
up personal that means it's me we're
talking about me do you understand so
i'm not telling you to take this advice
if you decide to take this advice and
you die whose fault not mine not mine
okay
okay
i'm not a professional anything i'm
literally a random 20 year old girl
with no credentials okay
bye
so first of all i want to get into
loneliness i've always been a lonely
person because i've always been
somebody with a different type of
personality and i've always felt like
whenever i need somebody to to defend me
to vouch for me they can never do it
because really think about it most
people can't even show their true
personalities so how can these
weak-minded people ever defend me so
even when i'm grouped up with family and
friends and all this i just have this i
just have it in the back of my mind that
if something was to happen right now you
couldn't even go to bat for me because
you're such a weak person you know when
you're when when you're a strong person
you need someone stronger to protect you
and so when you're the strongest person
in the room the most strong-minded
person in the room you feel so lonely i
feel like everybody around me is a
complete let down like you can't abandon
you can't abandon your beliefs and
choose me i feel unchosen
i feel unchosen by
my my family my friends i feel unchosen
by the world
and that is very depressing y'all that
is very depressing but hold on
don't start crying yet don't start
crying yet
because there's perks to this [ __ ] it's
perks to this lifestyle
when nobody cares about you
there's no expectations [ __ ] you have
no expectations to meet
do you understand what i'm saying when
you fit in when you fit in and everybody
likes you you have a certain expectation
that you need to meet day by day and if
you don't meet that expectation
you're gonna face rejection which is so
scary
but people like me we've already been
rejected there's already nobody there so
in a way we've been set free do you
understand what i'm saying
let me get into how my brain works i'm
the type of person if you call me stupid
a bunch of times
then i'm just gonna accept the fact that
i'm stupid and i'm just gonna continue
to move through life a lot of people
whenever they get caught stupid they're
gonna try to prove the person wrong
which i don't think that's a bad thing
just a lazy [ __ ] like me i don't like
to prove people wrong i like to just
exist you know what i mean i just i'm
just like a free you know i'm a hippie i
just want to exist so like it's the same
concept with being called ugly if you
call me ugly enough i'm gonna be like
this all right
and i'm gonna move with the flow
[Music]
because what the [ __ ] can i do
what the [ __ ] can i do all i can do is
consistently survive now hold on imagine
you're uh let's say you're a
conventionally attractive person
look at you having to fight for your
life every single day to stay in that
conventionally attractive spot
sounds like a lot of work to me when you
can just take your l
and live freely
here's the thing you may think oh my god
being unchosen is so
you know lonely you feel unwanted you
feel unvaluable
but hold on that's that's where we get
into some things
the world is fake what's real is what's
in your head i'm gonna sound like a
crackhead [ __ ] today
so lately i've just been living in my
head
because whenever i'm talking to people
it's i just don't feel like i'm talking
to real people like you're you're moving
your mouth but nothing you're saying is
making sense so i'm just looking but the
oh the only real conversation that's
going on is in my head and maybe i'm a
crackhead maybe i'm a crackhead and
maybe
maybe i need help
but it's just safer in here where things
make sense than out here where nothing
makes sense i've had so many people
recently tell me that they're so scared
to be their natural self because they're
going to get bullied
which is valid because getting bullied
sucks
but if you really think about it
i don't know you you just you just
accept your faith and you detach from it
like okay
y'all don't like me
i don't know you just keep it moving you
just keep it moving you just
i don't know you have to detach from the
world honestly
learning detachment and how have i
learned it i've learned it through yoga
and
going on walks things like that yoga is
really what really helps me right now
learning detachment is so much better
because why would you want to be
attached look at what we're living in
look at where we're living in land of
the fake land of judgmental
land of negativity land of low
vibrations when you you don't have to be
associated with that you can just live
in your brain where everything is safe
so now when i have conversations with
people the way that i cope because my
issue was i have this way that i want to
live life and whenever people talk to me
and they and the way that they talk the
things that they talk about i just hate
it so much
i just
i don't know you can just leave the
conversation you don't have to
participate you don't have to
participate in conversation you don't
have to participate in this world i mean
yes you have to go to work and stuff but
you you can really find a safe heaven
haven in your head
let me tell you me personally my
personality has never been hyped the
traits that i have in my personality
because let me be honest with y'all
i'm a very logical thinking
you know straightforward
blunt type person
i feel like my personality is very
similar to a stereotypical male
personality and having that type of
personality as a girl is not acceptable
they don't want logical they want
whimsical and emotional and not that i'm
not emotional i'm definitely emotional
but y'all do you see how i think like
the way that i think is like you know
like building blocks like straight lines
that's kind of how like i feel like a
lot of men think like i don't know
my personality has been judged for so
long my face has been judged for so long
that i was i'm like you know what
you know what i'mma let y'all have that
[Music]
i'm just gonna take my l officially
y'all won i'm gonna let y'all have that
because let me tell you why
trying hard to be accepted
is too much work
for me every single day i have to try so
hard to like
you know you know how many [ __ ]
personalities i use i have like 17
personalities that i put out there
because just being my real personality
is just not acceptable just being a very
you know it's not even like i'm a
carefree person but i guess i seem
carefree it's just not acceptable as a
person that looks like me i'm supposed
to sit in misery
about and think about all the people who
don't want me and i'm just supposed to
talk about how insecure i am 24 7. i
can't do that i want to catch a vibe i
want to catch moms i want to have fun i
want to breathe
this life isn't real and it's like
actually hold on let me be real let me
be real
i would love to live in a world where
i was just accepted because let's be
real that's easier that's easier
but that's not the case and there's only
so much you can do about stuff see how i
told you i'm very logical that's just
not the case and i can't morph into a
different person tomorrow all i can
really do is take my l and go to [ __ ] to
sleep like i don't know what else to say
another thing that's been really hard is
not a lot of people have the mindset
like me so
a big issue that i've been dealing with
right now is people
looking at me looking at the things that
i go through and being like oh my gosh i
could never
and i hate when people say that because
it's like just that sentence
the sentence is negative i don't know
how to explain it
that sentence of i could never do what
you do
it has a low vibrational vibe to it and
it's like they're trying to pull you
down back to hell with them but you have
to detach from those type of people
that's why i was saying i'm living in my
brain so anytime people talk about stuff
that i don't like i'm like this this is
not real
i'm like this there's no way this is not
real this is not real i'm not here right
now i'm inside what he's talking about
they're just confused like i don't know
them i'm not associated with them like
just complete
detachment i'm trying to not respond to
negative things to people who are in
such dark places
because why would i even go to your dark
place to speak to you let me stay in my
light and airy free place
and catch vibes and have fun the
craziest thing about
having
being on my mindset is that
what have i been getting called a lot
recently confident
confident
i am not confident i'm existing
the fact that i'm called confident
for existing
the world is a dark place and y'all got
a lot of issues going on you'll have a
lot of issues going on that this is a
big deal for me to just be
you see
you see what the issue is with just
being being someone that just bees
let's get into let's get into bullies
let's get into let's get into popular
kids and lame kids
now
for there to be popular kids think about
this for there to be popular kids there
has to be lame kids that envy
the popular kids and that's how they get
their power do you understand what i'm
saying people need
people to be pathetic and have low value
so that they can have high value do you
understand let's get into the yin gang
sign [ __ ] because i'm so obsessed with
it and balance
equal and opposite reactions if somebody
is beautiful somebody has to be ugly
if somebody is popular somebody has to
be lame if somebody is rich somebody has
to be poor so what if
we get rid of the poor people the
conventionally unattractive people what
if we get rid of the unpopular kids who
can't exist anymore popular people
conventionally attractive people and
they need they need us to have power
and now that i've separated myself from
this game that y'all are playing i've
decided i don't want to play anymore
i'll just take my l with pride you know
what i mean i'll just take my own with
pride and i'll leave it's an issue
because you're not able to thrive off of
my misery y'all hear me i'll be in
listen to me y'all
you're a person right now and you get
snow [ __ ] or you have no man
you have you you nobody likes you right
let me tell you you're still breathing
you're still here you're still existing
if you really needed those things when
you didn't have it you would have died
but you didn't die [ __ ] you're alive
you're alive
so you can find another way to live you
can find another way to be happy there's
always another way [ __ ]
they want us to think there's only one
way and if we don't have that one way we
should just be at home depressed crying
and throwing up nah [ __ ]
i'm here i'm existent i'm thriving
so yeah
the bright side to
not being accepted
is
less expectations
that's it
that's it i've always had a small amount
of expectations on me you have nothing
to lose when you are not chosen you
really have nothing to lose so you can
really be free you know what i mean
you know what i mean
all right that was like a short video
but that's the end bye y'all
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