What Actually Makes You Attractive? | Oestrogen Expert Dr Sarah Hill

Summary

This insightful discussion delves into the complexities of human attraction, revealing that it goes beyond physical traits to include unconscious cues and evolutionary factors. It explores how men and women have different preferences, with men tending to prioritize physical youthfulness and women valuing maturity and resource acquisition. The conversation also touches on the competition among women based on beauty, the influence of success on attractiveness, and the unique dynamic of friendships between gay men and women. Overall, it highlights the deep psychological and societal underpinnings of attraction and mate selection.

Takeaways

• 😀 Attraction is often unconscious and influenced by many small micro-expressions rather than just physical traits.
• 😀 People’s preferences for attractiveness are highly individual, with different factors influencing attraction based on personal experiences and evolutionary backgrounds.
• 😀 Men tend to prioritize physical attractiveness more than women, especially traits that signal fertility, such as body shape.
• 😀 Women, on the other hand, are generally more attracted to men who show signs of maturity, wisdom, and resource acquisition, such as older faces.
• 😀 Evolutionary factors play a role in attraction preferences, with men drawn to youthfulness and women drawn to maturity and stability.
• 😀 Research indicates men do not penalize women for being successful, as their attraction is primarily based on physical attractiveness.
• 😀 Women's attractiveness in terms of social mobility is often more significant than education or socioeconomic status.
• 😀 Competition among women tends to be more intense when they perceive each other as more physically attractive, often leading to derogation of other women.
• 😀 Social status and power dynamics may affect romantic choices, with women sometimes modifying their behaviors to compete for male attention, especially in environments with an imbalanced sex ratio.
• 😀 There is a common misconception among women that physical appearance doesn't matter in competition for mates, yet it remains an essential factor in their social interactions and relationships.
• 😀 Gay men and straight women often form close friendships due to a lack of romantic or sexual competition, providing a sense of trust and honest advice in the context of attractiveness and relationships.

Q & A

What is the primary factor behind attraction, according to the transcript?

Attraction is described as unconscious and influenced by a multitude of subtle, micro-expressions or cues, which are deeper than physical traits like body shape or facial features.

Why does the speaker believe most advice on how to be attractive is futile?

Because attraction is deeply personal and specific to the individual, often influenced by unconscious cues and subtle qualities that go beyond the usual advice about body shape or looks.

What evolutionary basis is suggested for human attraction?

Attraction might be rooted in evolutionary factors, such as finding a mate who is compatible for reproduction. Men may be attracted to physical traits linked to fertility, while women may prefer signs of maturity and resource acquisition.

How do men and women differ in their preferences for physical attraction?

Men tend to place greater emphasis on physical attractiveness and youthfulness, which are linked to fertility. Women, on the other hand, are more likely to prioritize signs of maturity, wisdom, and resource acquisition.

What physical trait in women is particularly emphasized by men due to its evolutionary significance?

The hourglass body shape is emphasized by men because it is linked to higher estrogen levels, which historically signified fertility.

Why are older men like George Clooney considered more attractive to women?

Older men like George Clooney are seen as more attractive due to cues of wisdom, status, and resource acquisition, which are associated with age and maturity.

Do men find successful women less attractive?

Research suggests that men do not penalize successful women based on their status. Men tend to rate women’s attractiveness primarily based on their physical appearance, regardless of their career or success.

What does the transcript say about jealousy among women in the context of competition for mates?

The transcript suggests that women are highly competitive with one another, particularly when there is an unequal sex ratio, as seen in college environments. Women may engage in behavior to increase their chances of attracting a mate, even if it involves casual hookups.

Are women more competitive with other women who are considered more beautiful or less beautiful?

Women are more competitive with those they perceive as more beautiful. Physical attractiveness is seen as a primary factor in competition because it directly impacts a woman’s ability to attract a mate.

What social advantage is mentioned for women who are considered physically attractive?

Physical attractiveness is a significant predictor of upward social mobility for women, even more so than education or socioeconomic background, as it plays a critical role in attracting higher-status mates.