How to stop overthinking

Summary

The video discusses how overthinking and anxious thoughts can negatively impact one's life. The speaker shares personal experiences of overcoming overthinking by realizing that different people have varying perceptions of the same person or situation. They emphasize the importance of self-awareness, voicing feelings in the moment, managing triggers, and focusing on facts rather than emotions. Practical tips include journaling, meditation, and seeking help when needed. The speaker encourages viewers to trust life's process, believe in themselves, and avoid comparing themselves to others on social media.

Takeaways

• 🤔 Overthinking can create unnecessary stress and manifest situations that were never meant to happen.
• 🌟 People have different perceptions of you based on their experiences, so don't take things personally.
• 🗣️ Voice your thoughts in the moment to prevent resentment and unnecessary overthinking.
• 📝 Journaling or creating art can help externalize thoughts and reduce overthinking.
• 🧐 Identify the root cause of your fears to understand why you overthink certain situations.
• 📊 Focus on facts rather than feelings to gain a clearer perspective and reduce overthinking.
• 💡 Visualize negative thoughts as bubbles and 'pop' them to dismiss overthinking.
• 🌱 Accept that not everything is within your control and that's okay; life has a plan.
• 🙏 Ask for help when you need it; it's a sign of strength, not weakness.
• 🧘‍♀️ Practice yoga, meditation, and breathing exercises to calm your mind and reduce overthinking.
• 🌱 Realize that life works itself out and overthinking only creates more stress.
• 🙅‍♀️ Stop trying to be perfect and accept that everyone has different perceptions of what's perfect.
• 📱 Limit social media usage to reduce comparisons and overthinking about others' lives.

Q & A

What is the main issue the speaker addresses in the video?

The speaker addresses the problem of overthinking and how it can ruin one's life, sharing personal experiences and strategies to overcome it.

How does the speaker describe the impact of overthinking on their life?

The speaker describes overthinking as a process that led to the manifestation of negative situations and feelings of anxiety, which were not based in reality.

What is the first realization the speaker suggests to prevent overthinking?

The speaker suggests realizing that no one knows you completely and different people have different perceptions of you, which can help in not overthinking situations.

Why does the speaker emphasize the importance of voicing thoughts in the moment?

Voicing thoughts in the moment prevents resentment and unnecessary thoughts from accumulating, leading to a clearer mind and better mental health.

What role do the speaker's experiences with their mother play in their understanding of overthinking?

The speaker uses their mother as an example to illustrate how different people can have different perceptions of the same person, which is a lesson in not overthinking others' opinions.

How does the speaker recommend dealing with negative emotions that lead to overthinking?

The speaker recommends expressing negative emotions directly to the person involved, journaling, or creating art as a way to release those emotions.

What is the significance of understanding the source of one's fears according to the speaker?

Understanding the source of fears helps in recognizing the root cause of overthinking, allowing one to address the underlying issues rather than the imagined scenarios.

Why does the speaker suggest looking at facts instead of feelings when overthinking?

Looking at facts helps to ground oneself in reality and dispel the unrealistic scenarios created by overthinking, which are often based on fear and emotions.

What technique does the speaker's therapist recommend to deal with negative thoughts?

The therapist recommends visualizing negative thoughts as bubbles and 'poking' them with a needle mentally to dismiss them quickly.

How does the speaker view the role of life's challenges in personal growth?

The speaker sees life's challenges as lessons and opportunities for growth, believing that overthinking these challenges is unnecessary as they lead to personal development.

What is the speaker's advice on dealing with the fear of rejection?

The speaker advises accepting that not everyone will like or accept you and to not let others' opinions define your reality.

Outlines

00:00

🤔 Overcoming Overthinking

The speaker shares their personal journey of being an overthinker and how it led to the manifestation of negative situations. They explain that overthinking can have serious consequences and share their method of learning to stop overthinking by trusting life. The speaker introduces the topic of the video, which is about helping viewers to stop overthinking. They emphasize that perceptions of oneself can vary greatly from person to person, and that overthinking often stems from trying to predict or control other people's opinions and actions. The speaker encourages viewers to voice their thoughts in the moment to prevent resentment and overthinking.

05:00

💭 Identifying the Source of Overthinking

The speaker delves into the reasons behind overthinking, such as attachment issues and fear of abandonment, using the example of waiting for a text message and the anxiety it can cause. They explain that overthinking often stems from past experiences and emotional triggers. The speaker advises looking at facts instead of feelings to combat overthinking and suggests techniques like journaling and creating art to express and release pent-up emotions. They also recommend understanding the root cause of fears and overthinking, and using visualization techniques to 'pop' negative thoughts like bubbles.

10:02

🧘‍♀️ Calming the Mind Through Physical Practices

The speaker discusses the importance of calming the mind through practices such as deep stomach breathing, yoga, and meditation. They explain how these activities can help relax the body and mind, reducing the tendency to overthink. The speaker also encourages going for walks in nature or spending time with pets as ways to find peace and reduce overthinking. They share their personal experiences of how life teaches lessons and how overthinking can be reduced by accepting that life works itself out.

15:02

🙏 Acceptance and Gratitude

The speaker talks about the importance of acceptance and gratitude in reducing overthinking. They explain that not getting what one wants might be because it was not meant for them, and that better opportunities may be on the way. The speaker encourages viewers to have faith that everything happens for a reason and to trust in a higher power to guide their lives. They also discuss the importance of not letting others' opinions define one's self-worth and to focus on personal growth and self-belief.

20:03

🚫 Avoiding Comparison and Embracing Individuality

The speaker addresses the negative impact of social media on mental health and the tendency to compare oneself to others, which can lead to overthinking and dissatisfaction. They advise viewers to stop comparing themselves to others and to focus on their own growth and gratitude. The speaker emphasizes that everyone has their own path and timing in life, and that comparing oneself to others does not lead to happiness. They conclude the video by encouraging viewers to love and appreciate themselves and to be grateful for their own journey.

Keywords

💡Overthinking

Overthinking refers to the habit of continuously analyzing situations or events, often leading to unnecessary stress and anxiety. In the video, overthinking is portrayed as a destructive habit that can manifest negative situations or emotions that were never meant to happen. The speaker emphasizes how overthinking leads to fear-based scenarios and urges viewers to stop this cycle by staying grounded in reality.

💡Perception

Perception is the way individuals interpret and understand the world around them. The video highlights that people have different perceptions of the same person or event, which may not align with reality. The speaker uses the example of how different people perceive her in various ways, but no one truly knows her. This idea is central to the theme of not allowing others' perceptions to affect one's self-worth.

💡Manifestation

Manifestation is the process of bringing something into reality through thoughts or beliefs. The speaker notes how overthinking can lead to the manifestation of situations or emotions that were not originally intended, such as creating conflict or assuming negative outcomes. The video suggests that focusing on positive, grounded thoughts can help manifest better outcomes.

💡Triggers

Triggers refer to events or situations that provoke emotional reactions, often linked to past experiences or unresolved issues. The video discusses how overthinking is often triggered by deep-rooted fears, such as abandonment or rejection. Recognizing the source of these triggers is essential for overcoming overthinking and managing emotions.

💡Resentment

Resentment is the feeling of bitterness or anger that arises when someone feels they have been wronged. The speaker warns against holding onto negative emotions by not expressing one's feelings in the moment. She advises voicing thoughts and opinions when something feels wrong to prevent harboring resentment, which can lead to bigger emotional issues over time.

💡Fear

Fear is a powerful emotion that can lead to overthinking and anxiety. The video explains that many overthinking patterns stem from fear of rejection, abandonment, or failure. The speaker encourages viewers to confront their fears and look at the facts instead of letting fear-based thoughts control their actions.

💡Self-sabotage

Self-sabotage refers to actions or thoughts that undermine one’s success or well-being, often unconsciously. The speaker talks about how overthinking can lead to self-sabotage, where individuals create negative scenarios in their minds and act in ways that harm their relationships or opportunities. Recognizing and stopping these patterns is crucial for mental well-being.

💡Reality

Reality, as contrasted with fear or overthinking, refers to the actual facts of a situation rather than the imagined or emotional responses. The speaker encourages viewers to focus on reality by analyzing facts rather than reacting based on feelings or assumptions. This approach is presented as a way to stop overthinking and approach life with clarity.

💡Acceptance

Acceptance involves acknowledging situations, outcomes, or people's behaviors without resistance or overthinking. The video promotes acceptance as a way to deal with disappointment or rejection, whether it's not getting a job or losing a relationship. By accepting what is not meant for you, the speaker suggests that you open yourself to better opportunities.

💡Gratitude

Gratitude is the practice of being thankful for what one has, which the speaker frames as essential for mental well-being and personal growth. Instead of comparing oneself to others, especially on social media, the speaker suggests focusing on gratitude to stop overthinking and feel more content in life. Gratitude helps shift focus from lack to abundance.

Highlights

Overthinking can lead to manifesting negative situations that were never meant to happen.

Different versions of yourself exist in other people's minds; everyone has a unique perception of you.

Stop overthinking by understanding that no one truly knows anyone else; they only have experiences with others.

Voice your thoughts in the moment to prevent resentment and avoid filling your mind with unnecessary thoughts.

Overthinking stems from fear; identifying the root cause can help address it more effectively.

Look at facts rather than emotions when overthinking; emotions may cloud judgment, while facts clarify reality.

Overthinking can be reduced by imagining negative thoughts as bubbles and mentally 'popping' them.

Overthinking does not change the situation. Focus on the present and work toward solutions.

Ask for help when needed; it's a sign of strength, not weakness.

Lack of sleep or exhaustion can increase overthinking. Rest is essential for mental clarity.

Breathing exercises, yoga, and meditation are helpful tools to calm the mind and reduce overthinking.

Understand that life is working itself out for you, even if things don't happen as you initially wanted.

Acceptance of rejection and failure can bring peace; not everything is meant for you, but better things may be ahead.

Social media comparison worsens overthinking; focus on your own life and be grateful for what you have.

Gratitude for what you have is key to personal growth and avoiding the trap of comparison.

Transcripts

overthinking and anxious thoughts can

literally ruin your life I used to be a

huge overthinker I used to think that

this is going to happen this person

thinks this about me all these thoughts

would go through my head and I would

actually manifest those situations even

though they were never meant to happen

or I would manifest a person being angry

at me even though that was never the

case in the first place because in my

head I had already made that situ

situation up when it was never going to

happen overthinking can even lead to

such serious

consequences I learned how to stop

overthinking how to trust life and I'm

going to show you guys how you can do

the same thing in this video hi guys my

name is this and welcome back to my

Channel first thing I need you to

realize is no one knows you different

versions of you exist in everyone's head

see someone can look at my videos and

think wow that girl saved my life she's

amazing another person can look at me

and think I hate her she ruined me I

completely feel so lost because of her

why because they had a different

perception of me when they were

listening to me I'm the same person but

people have different experiences with

me it's the same way with other people

like for example imagine your mother

right if I ask you right now oh how is

your mother you will give me an answer

oh she's like this this is whatever

right but then I ask your sibling how is

your mother maybe they had a completely

different experience with her and they

have a completely different perception

of her but then who is your mother who

is

she you don't know I don't know and your

sibling doesn't know maybe your mother

doesn't even know who she is herself

that's why I think it's very foolish to

think of like oh why did they do do that

I would have never expected them to do

that oh why didn't that job hire me I

didn't expect that you didn't know them

you didn't know that person you had a

perception of them in your head but that

perception is not them that's your

experience with that person that is not

that person that is not that interviewer

that job interviewer that wanted to hire

you maybe thought Oh I thought they

liked me but they in their head had

completely different experience with you

start to understand that nobody knows

you and you don't know anyone we only

have perceptions of other people so in

that way you won't overthink situations

you can accept that Hey listen even

though I might have thought I did a

great job that other person didn't have

a great experience with me and that's

okay thing is voice your thoughts in the

moment so my sister said this to me

recently she said Liz the one thing that

I admire about you the most is the fact

that whenever you say something or

whenever you think something in the

moment you voice it you say it like if

something hurt me in the moment I will

say it oh I didn't like that I'm I'm not

really like I don't make a scene about

it I'm also a very chill person I don't

get offended easily but if I didn't like

something I'll tell you in the moment I

didn't like that please don't do that

this is also how resentment gets created

and then you become the kind of person

you're always angry at like minor things

because you didn't voice your opinion

when you were mistreated you collected

yourself back then so now all those

emotions will come up for the like the

minimum thing right I the reason why I

always voice my thoughts in the moment

and what I think is because I cannot

afford to let my brain be filled with

unnecessary thoughts I need this to be

free not only for my job but also just

for life and to have a peace of mind I

want to go to bed at night not thinking

about these things anymore if I tell you

in the moment moment I didn't like that

and we can resolve it right then and

there I'm happy I don't go to bed with

fight anger or res resentment because I

cannot afford that you feel triggered by

something or offended just say that to

the person that offended you or

triggered you like hey this is a trigger

for me hey this offended me there's

nothing wrong in voicing your opinion

another thing you can also do is Journal

about it before you go to bed like the

situation Journal write it down whatever

but make sure that it's out of here onto

something else you can even paint do

whatever create an art piece something

that removes the that makes the emotions

and the the thoughts in your head move

other thing you need to realize is where

is that trigger or fear coming from see

overthinking is basically creating

situations out of fear situations that

might never happen but you are fearful

of those situations sometimes people

overthink like for example

a guy didn't text you back fast enough

right and you start to overthink oh my

God he doesn't like me oh my God he he

doesn't want me anymore this that you

overthink and you create this crazy

scene in your head right and you start

to self- sabotage yourself where is this

coming from most likely you have

attachment issues most likely maybe a

parent has left your life an early age

and shown you that you like there was no

commitment towards you so now every

single partner you have you're scared

that they're going to leave you as well

so then you start to overthink and

that's where that fear is coming from

and that the the person not replying to

you fast enough that's triggering you

into that fear into

overthinking so when you start

overthinking something even if you have

a job right and that job didn't hire you

why does that trigger you so much why

where is that coming from maybe you feel

like oh they don't see me they they're

not they're not validating me the way

the way I wish they would validate me

this is making me feel less about myself

I want to feel worthy these are all

triggers like look at the base what is

behind the the reason that you're

overthinking everything other thing is

look at facts instead of feelings see

when we are overthinking we are acting

out of feelings right we're acting out

of triggers we're acting out of fear but

look at the facts that person probably

busy that's why he's not answering you

right now he's not going to leave you

that's a fact

um the that job they didn't hire you

because maybe they just found someone

better you were just not good enough for

that position does that mean you're not

good in enough enough in Life or you

will not get a better opportunity no

that's also a fact like when those

thoughts come up you have to ask

yourself okay this thought that I have

right now that I feel like they're going

to abandon me that I feel like I was not

worthy because of that job didn't hire

me is that true ask yourself is is this

what I'm thinking right now this thought

is it true other thing was like every

single time U my therapist actually she

thought this to me a thought would come

up that was like negative or bad or

whatever or even if I saw a negative

comment she said Liz imagine it like

with like a bubble in your head like a

thought coming up like a bubble and

you're poking it with a needle

immediately when it comes so imagine I

saw a bad comment right and it came to

my head I started overthinking poke I I

do like poke like it's I'm poking it

with a needle and and it really helped

me overthinking will not change the

situation what if does not

exist when you can sit there for hours

for days overthinking the situation

thinking oh this might happen this might

happen whatever but the only thing we

have right now is the present moment

what is happening right now is this

nothing else you being anxious about

what might happen in the future is not

real you might create those situations

because of your fear that's manifesting

it or you might actually start looking

at Solutions instead of the problem see

we have problems every single day right

we we had bigger problems that this we

had smaller problems that this but did

did you not fix them are you not still

here overthinking the situation can only

get worse if we allow it to get worse we

can just see there is a problem that

arises all of my successful friends they

do the same thing problem comes we solve

it okay how can we solve it how what can

we do what are the option bum bum bum

bum bum and we look at it you have to

especially with if you're big over

thinking you have to start thinking

quickly in these situations I've been

always in survival mode throughout my

childhood so for me this comes very

easily and very naturally I'm very good

at solving situations under stress don't

be afraid to ask for help ask for help

when you need help if if there's a

situation that arises and you feel like

oh my God I don't know what to do call

call someone ask someone uh ask someone

else to connect you with someone else to

help you don't be afraid to ask for help

you're not weak you're very strong

you're you're reaching out to people and

say Hey listen I can't handle this on my

own you know how much courage that takes

that is incredibly strong and people

will help you people will help you I've

been helped so many times by so many

people that I'm so grateful for and I

could not have been here without those

people so don't be shy to ask for help

thing is when you're overthinking calm

yourself down either go to sleep I've

noticed when I start overthinking a lot

it's also because I either I didn't have

good enough sleep or I'm just very tired

right now so then I start overthinking

when I go to sleep all those thoughts go

away because sometimes your body just

needs rest and that's why it's like

overthinking thinking weird thoughts

because you're just tired thing is with

breathing exercises my my yoga teacher

he actually taught me this like when

you're breathing we should actually

breathe through our stomach so that we

relax so when you breathe

in your stomach expands and then you

breathe out and your stomach goes in

again that really relaxes you if you do

that a couple of times your body will

relax other thing is yoga and meditation

yoga helps immensely with overthinking

and calming your body down when I

consistently do yoga I'm so so relaxed

like it calms your whole nervous system

down uh and meditation the same thing

just sitting there even for 5 minutes

closing your eyes and just realizing

that you're right now in the moment that

you're present and this is what we have

right now will calm you down immensely

go out for a walk in nature go watch the

sunset go to the beach go play with your

pet anything that can relax you in the

moment will help you immensely with

overthinking other thing is Life Works

itself out for you see I used to be ever

since I was young such a big overthinker

because I wanted to control life and I

want I wanted to control how everything

went I knew what I wanted and I was

going to get what I wanted but what did

I not anticipate was all the things that

I first had to go through to get where I

want I didn't plan those things but see

life did life needed to teach me lessons

life also humbled me in a big way so

that now that I am at this stage where I

have everything I still have humility I

don't look down on people and I don't

think that I'm better than anyone and so

that's also when I realized all those

years overthinking the situation all

those years thinking that this is how it

should have happened no when I look back

at my life it happened exactly the way

it was meant to happen exactly the way

and and I would have never predicted

this way for myself but this was the way

I needed it to come to this point so

it's the same way for you you might

think why are those things happening

right now that's not what I want this is

what I want it will never get better

blah blah it will but the lessons that

you're learning right now are crucial

for you you need those lessons you need

those lessons and you will only realize

that when you come to a state

that you get what you want and then you

will look back and be like you know what

I'm grateful for those lessons I'm

grateful I went through what I went

through because I would not be the

person that I am today another thing I

need you to realize is it was not meant

for

you stop overthinking why does this not

work why did that person leave my life

why did I not get this job it was not

meant for you you were not supposed to

have that thing and you were maybe you

were meant to have something much

greater but because you cannot let go of

why did I not get this thing that other

thing that was meant for you cannot come

in way I see Life Is God is always

protecting me and whatever is removed

from my life or whatever opportunity I

didn't get is because God is giving me

something bigger this is my mentality

and 100% I believe this and every single

time my theory has been proved proven

right because God has not failed me God

has my back and I believe

this sometimes when people leave

sometimes when you don't get that job

it's not meant for you and have peace

with that you need to start accepting

that people will not like you some

people will not like you some people

will dislike you for no reason some

people will not give you that job

because they don't like you people will

discriminate you people will be racist

to you people will not accept you as you

are but that does not happen have to

Define you you don't have to take their

perception of you as your reality you

are not what they're telling you you are

not their version of you start having

peace with the fact that not every job

is going to like you not every brand

whatever is going to like you because

you don't fit their standards they they

want to be with someone else and that is

also okay the more you start accepting

that people will re reject you because

that's just humans that's human nature

not everyone will like us the more

easier life

becomes and the more you start thinking

No it should be like this oh no I should

have this you're thinking in

lack why are you thinking in lack do you

think because that person walked out of

your life God will not provide you with

someone else do you think because you

didn't get that job God will not provide

you with a better job do we as humans

think so small minded why do we think of

God as someone so small people are

building huge things spaceships uh like

even an airplane how do you even build

an airplane I don't know how do you

build buildings that's that's like

insane

skyscrapers you think people are capable

of doing the craziest stuff but God will

not fix your life understand that you're

not your failure you know like okay what

it didn't work out okay ant you start

that business didn't work out okay ant

you were married before for years on end

it didn't work out okay a you think you

can't do that again you think you can't

get better

again why do you guys think so small

start thinking bigger for yourself you

think you were created and put on this

Earth to just suffer no I don't believe

that I think we were put on this Earth

to have the best life possible and I

think God is backing us like crazy but

you guys never asked ask you guys don't

even ask other people you guys don't

even ask God you guys don't ask anyone

and then you're like oh why is my life

so hard ask ask for the biggest things

these people are not special the money

and stuff all these things are not

special those things come to those who

believe in themselves those things come

to those who believe in God and believe

that God is backing them those are the

ones that get it because they're like

yeah life is going to be great for me

yeah it should be great because I'm

alive that should be your mentality my

life should be great because I am alive

so let go of trying to be perfect you're

trying to be perfect trying to do this

perfect this and that you might create

something and you think that's perfect

in your eyes someone will comment on it

and say that's the worst thing I've ever

seen in my life once you start

understanding that you'll never be

perfect because every single person has

a different perception of what perfect

is that's when you can fully let go of

trying to impress or trying to be

perfect if you're waiting to be perfect

you'll never get it done because you

won't even start cuz nothing is

perfect you do it and do it wrong do it

badly let people even laugh at

you but at least make sure that whatever

you're doing you're you're standing

behind it that you love it that's the

most important thing if you whatever you

do you would buy it yourself or you

would watch your videos yourself or you

think that whatever you're doing is

interesting that's when it will sell

because you believe in your own product

another thing is you are not their

opinion see maybe your parents have told

you you're not good enough maybe your

teacher maybe uh I don't know who told

you you're not good enough your crazy ex

um your friends whoever made you feel

like you're not good enough you're not

their opinion you are not their opinion

you don't F that reality for yourself

you have to reaffirm to yourself I am

the greatest I am so good I'm amazing

I'm mesmerizing I will get everything I

want you know I grew up in a situation

where everything was so bad like I

looked around me everyone was suffering

everyone was getting abused and I was

like but in my head I was like oh

I'm going to make it I'm going to make

it I'm going to make it I would even

listen to motivational videos of that

will tell that would tell me I'm going

to make it every single day I would go

to my shitty job that I hated so much I

would go there like at 5:00 a.m. I would

walk there um I'll would go there and I

would listen to these people screaming

these men screaming at me you're going

to make it you're going to be amazing

this that I would constantly listen to

it and reaffirm it to myself because

when you have no hope anymore

reaffirming to yourself that everything

is going to be okay is actually what

makes you feel feel sane in an insane

situation last but not least social

media is making everyone crazy see

listen social media made it so easy for

everyone to compare our lives and then

you start to overthink your life because

you think oh my God they're at this age

doing this already and you can see it

and then you're like oh my God I'm too

late I can't do it I will not find love

because I'm not old or whatever stop

stop whatever people are portraying on

social media I know many people that

have this social media platform that are

so unhappy in real life but on their all

social medias they look so happy

whatever they have everything and in

real life it's just not the

case stop comparing yourself to other

people and whatever those people are

going through or what they have you can

never take that away from them that's

for them and what you have right now

that is for you the only way you make

yourself grow is by putting gratitude

into your life by being grateful for

what you have that's how everything will

expand more and more but you just

comparing yourself to other people and

thinking in lack or being jealous of

what they have will never get you what

you want the grass is always greener on

the other side until we realize that the

only grass that matters is our own if

it's hard for you just do not follow

these people do not look at these app

that you constantly see people having

better things than you then walk away

from it and literally protect your own

peace of

mind and otherwise just realize that

whatever is meant for you will happen

anyways and what is meant for them will

also happen have peace with yourself and

have peace with life hope you guys

enjoyed this video I hope you guys

learned something um and yeah I love you

guys so much I appreciate you guys so

much and I'm really grateful for you

thank you so much for watching I love

you guys bye- bye