QUIT DRINKING MOTIVATION - The Most Eye Opening 20 Minutes Of Your Life

Summary

The video script narrates a personal journey from alcohol addiction to sobriety, detailing the physical and emotional toll of alcohol abuse. It highlights the societal normalization of drinking and its damaging effects on health, relationships, and self-worth. The speaker shares their struggle with addiction, the realization of needing change, and the transformative power of sobriety. They also discuss the broader impact of alcohol on society and the importance of seeking help and finding purpose beyond substance abuse.

Takeaways

• 🍷 The speaker has been sober for years after struggling with alcohol addiction.
• 🚫 They initially tried moderate drinking but found it led to excessive consumption and harmful hangovers.
• 📚 Reading a book was a pivotal moment that led to their decision to quit drinking.
• 🧠 Alcohol consumption, even in small amounts, can cause damage to the entire body.
• 🔁 The narrative of addiction as a lifelong struggle was a belief the speaker once held.
• 🏥 Alcohol affects cellular health, causing damage that can lead to various health issues.
• 🌐 Alcohol is normalized in society, often seen as a social glue, but it can have severe consequences.
• 🚭 The speaker's family history includes alcoholism, which influenced their perspective on drinking.
• 💪 Quitting alcohol was a significant personal achievement, bringing a sense of pride.
• 📉 Abstinence from alcohol can lead to improved health, including longer life and reversal of certain conditions.
• 🌟 The speaker encourages finding purpose and adventure in life as a substitute for addiction.

Q & A

How long has the speaker been sober?

The speaker has been sober for a couple of years.

What was the turning point for the speaker to quit drinking?

The speaker decided to quit drinking due to the debilitating effects of hangovers that lasted for a whole day.

What was the speaker's initial experience with alcohol?

The speaker's initial experience with alcohol was negative, as they became an 'awful human being' after consuming it.

How did the speaker's perception of alcohol change over time?

Initially, the speaker viewed alcohol as something that could be consumed in moderation. However, they later realized the negative impacts on their health and life, leading to a complete change in perception.

What was the speaker's lifestyle like before quitting alcohol?

Before quitting alcohol, the speaker's lifestyle involved excessive drinking, which led to health issues, loss of friendships, and a decline in aspirations.

What was the speaker's family's influence on their alcohol consumption?

The speaker's family, particularly their mother, had a significant influence by warning against the dangers of alcohol and reinforcing the negative outcomes of addiction.

What health benefits did the speaker experience after quitting alcohol?

After quitting alcohol, the speaker experienced improved health, including increased energy, weight loss, and reversal of arterial sclerosis.

What is the definition of an alcoholic according to the speaker?

An alcoholic is defined as someone who can't stop once they start, often drinking until they pass out or become dysfunctional.

What is the impact of alcohol on cells and tissues in the body?

Alcohol, specifically in the form of acetyl aldehyde, can damage and kill cells indiscriminately, affecting various organs and tissues.

How does the speaker describe the societal normalization of alcohol?

The speaker describes alcohol as being normalized in society, often considered a social glue that is present in various celebrations and events.

What advice does the speaker give to those struggling with alcohol addiction?

The speaker advises those struggling with alcohol addiction to seek treatment and to find activities and a lifestyle that provide a sense of purpose and happiness without the need for alcohol.

Outlines

00:00

🍺 Sobriety Journey and Alcohol's Impact

The speaker shares their personal journey of sobriety, highlighting the negative effects of alcohol on their life. They recount their struggle with hangovers and the realization that alcohol was controlling their life. After reading a book, they quit drinking and experienced significant improvements in their health and well-being. The narrative emphasizes the societal normalization of alcohol and the misconception that it's a social glue, contrasting it with the reality of addiction and its detrimental effects on physical and mental health. The speaker also discusses the broader implications of alcohol consumption, such as its role in various social events and the potential for it to lead to severe health issues, including cancer.

05:00

🌟 Change and Recovery

This paragraph delves into the speaker's decision to change, motivated by the pain of their current situation outweighing the fear of change. They describe their experience in a treatment center, acknowledging the importance of developing new skills and tools for living. The narrative includes the societal pressures on young people to drink and the speaker's advice to find alternative paths to happiness that don't involve alcohol. The paragraph also addresses the health benefits of reduced alcohol intake, such as increased longevity and the reversal of arterial sclerosis, and the speaker's personal transformation after a year and a half of sobriety.

10:02

🧬 The Science of Alcohol and Its Effects

The speaker explores the scientific aspects of alcohol metabolism, explaining how alcohol is converted into toxic substances within the body and the damage it causes at the cellular level. They discuss the process of alcohol breaking down into acetaldehyde, a poison, and then into acetate, which the body can use as fuel. The paragraph also covers the societal perception of alcohol as a harmful drug, its classification as a carcinogen, and the increased risks associated with even moderate alcohol consumption. The speaker emphasizes the need for awareness about alcohol's impact and the importance of seeking treatment for those struggling with addiction.

15:04

🤝 Support and the Desire for Change

In this paragraph, the speaker reflects on the importance of wanting to change as a prerequisite for overcoming addiction. They share a personal story of a friend who was struggling with alcohol and how a meaningful conversation led to a realization about the value of life and the desire for change. The narrative also touches on societal attitudes towards alcohol and other drugs, the fear and denial that surround addiction, and the need for open conversations about the issue. The speaker concludes with a personal account of their own dark period, the impact of alcohol on their life, and the journey towards self-discovery and redemption.

Keywords

💡Sobriety

Sobriety refers to the state of not being under the influence of alcohol or drugs. In the context of the video, it is a central theme as the speaker discusses their journey from alcohol addiction to sobriety. The speaker mentions being 'sober for a couple of years' and the transformative impact it had on their life, highlighting the importance of sobriety in overcoming addiction.

💡Addiction

Addiction is a chronic brain disease characterized by compulsive engagement in rewarding stimuli, despite adverse consequences. The video script deeply explores addiction, particularly to alcohol, as the speaker shares their personal struggle and how it controlled their life, leading to 'paranoid and afraid of everything'. Addiction is portrayed as a progressive decline that affects not just the individual but also their relationships and overall well-being.

💡Alcoholic

An alcoholic is someone with a dependency on alcohol, often unable to control their drinking. The script uses this term to describe a person who drinks excessively and experiences negative consequences as a result. The speaker contrasts the common misconception of an alcoholic with their own experience, emphasizing that alcoholism is not just about 'rock bottom' but a spectrum that can affect anyone who drinks excessively.

💡Hangovers

Hangovers are the unpleasant symptoms that can occur after excessive alcohol consumption, such as headache, nausea, and fatigue. The speaker mentions 'debilitating' hangovers as a turning point in their decision to quit drinking, illustrating the physical toll that alcohol can take on the body.

💡Treatment Center

A treatment center is a facility that provides structured programs for individuals struggling with addiction. The script references the speaker's time at a 'treatment center' where they lived for a hundred days, indicating the serious and long-term commitment required to overcome addiction and the support such centers can provide.

💡Relapse

Relapse refers to a return to addictive behavior after a period of abstinence. The speaker discusses their multiple attempts to quit drinking and the shame associated with relapsing, which is a common challenge for individuals recovering from addiction. This keyword highlights the difficulty of maintaining sobriety and the resilience needed to continue fighting addiction.

💡Alcoholism

Alcoholism is a term used to describe chronic alcohol addiction. The video script uses personal narratives to depict alcoholism, showing how it can lead to severe health issues, social problems, and a loss of control over one's life. The speaker's story illustrates the devastating effects of alcoholism and the journey towards recovery.

💡Abstinence

Abstinence is the practice of refraining from an activity, especially the consumption of alcohol. The speaker talks about choosing abstinence as a way to regain control over their life and improve their health. Abstinence is presented as a positive choice that leads to better physical and mental well-being.

💡Health Benefits

Health benefits refer to the positive effects on one's physical and mental condition. The script discusses various health benefits of stopping alcohol consumption, such as 'living longer', 'clearing out their kidneys', and 'reversing arterial sclerosis'. These benefits underscore the detrimental impact of alcohol on health and the advantages of sobriety.

💡Social Norm

A social norm is a behavior or standard that is typical and expected within a society or group. The video script touches on how alcohol consumption is a 'social norm' that is deeply ingrained in many cultures. The speaker reflects on how societal acceptance of alcohol made their addiction seem more acceptable, but ultimately led to negative consequences.

💡Rock Bottom

Rock bottom is a colloquial term for the lowest point in a person's life, often used in the context of addiction to describe the crisis that prompts a change. The speaker mentions reaching 'rock bottom', which was a pivotal moment that led to their decision to seek help and change their lifestyle, illustrating the desperation that can be a catalyst for recovery.

Highlights

The individual has been sober for a couple of years after initially struggling with alcohol.

They were able to maintain moderate drinking for about eight years before deciding to quit.

The decision to quit alcohol was due to the severity of hangovers and their negative impact on daily life.

Reading a book was a pivotal moment that led to the decision to become sober.

Alcohol consumption, even in low amounts, can cause harm to the entire body.

Addiction is described as compulsive behavior to feel better, leading to negative consequences.

The individual is proud of overcoming addiction, which was once seen as a sign of weakness.

Research indicates that quitting alcohol can lead to longer life and health improvements such as reversed arterial sclerosis.

Alcohol is often perceived as a social norm, but it can lead to a decline in life aspirations.

The individual drank excessively from the age of 15 to 24, which led to severe addiction and paranoia.

Alcohol affects people differently; some may not become addicted, while others face severe consequences.

Excessive drinking is defined as 13 or more drinks per week for men, with significant health risks.

Alcohol is a class one carcinogen, with no safe level of consumption.

The societal and personal costs of alcohol abuse are immense, often leading to accidents, cancers, and heart disease.

Only 10 percent of people with alcohol use disorders seek treatment, with even fewer achieving long-term success.

The desire to change is crucial for overcoming addiction, as highlighted by a personal story of recovery.

Alcohol's damaging effects on cells are due to its conversion into toxic molecules like acetyl aldehyde.

The liver plays a critical role in metabolizing alcohol, but it can be severely damaged in the process.

The feeling of being drunk is actually a disruption caused by a toxic molecule, acetyl aldehyde.

Alcohol's impact on the brain and body can lead to a wide range of disorders, from sleep issues to anxiety and depression.

The individual's life has significantly improved after addressing their alcohol addiction.

Alcohol is often used to numb out anxiety, pain, and discomfort, but it's essential to find healthier alternatives.

The transcript emphasizes the importance of seeking help and changing one's lifestyle to overcome addiction.

Transcripts

want to go drinking tonight

thanks but I'm actually sober now uh

okay no problem can I ask why

I'll show you

I'm sober for a couple of years and then

I thought you know I want to just drink

like a normal person and I want to have

wine at dinner and so on and I and you

know I was able to for about eight years

I'm embarrassed how many times

I quit and couldn't do it well I was at

a point in my life where it was like

this has gotta stop because my hangovers

were getting so ridiculous and

debilitating for a whole day so I'm not

doing this anymore and I read a book and

then I was done I had my first beer at

11. one of my cousins gave it to me it's

that awful thing that you hear every

alcoholic talk about and if they don't

talk about it they're lying like it's

you just become an awful human being

like you just um you're selfish alcohol

consumption even in the low amounts

causes harm to the entire body so many

years that like the narrative was for me

is this has a hold over you you will

never break this cycle you are a

prisoner of your own weakness addiction

is really anything we do or use

compulsively to make ourselves feel

better that has negative consequences I

for maybe the first time am proud of

myself that I didn't quit quitting

because it's demoralized like to truly

be powerless over something is [ __ ]

demoralizing and so rough if you stop

drinking for 30 days just cut back and

what they're finding is people are

living longer that's clearing out their

kidneys arterial sclerosis is being

reversed people are having all kinds of

lower energy they're losing weight to me

I know that alcohol is uh usually like

bad for you but I didn't know like how

bad it was I started to drink more and

more and more every day when I come home

from work and I start to drink and I

just sit there drink to pass out on the

couch from 15 to 24 I drank and used my

way through life and eventually ended up

in Boston at that point my addiction had

gotten so bad that I was paranoid and

afraid of everything to keep it simple

we use for one or two reasons so to

either start feeling something or to

stop

particularly the path that I'm on is uh

it's one that's it's it's one I wished I

could have been on a long time ago

you'll ruin your life somehow some way

it is ever

FS into all the cells and tissues of

your body it was a very Progressive

decline in my aspirations alcohol is

normalized in our society you want to

figure out something that you're doing

with your life that's worth not getting

drunk and screwing up I Drank In Search

Of Happiness and in search of a

lifestyle that I thought would bring me

to happiness it didn't and I woke up one

morning going wow I've drank a lot but

I'm still not happy what's that about I

recall in high school motivational

speakers will come to my school and say

don't do drugs but absent from those

talks with any reference to alcohol

alcohol got introduced to my life you

might say well why do people drink too

much it's like if you like alcohol

that's a stupid question it is ingrained

it's the social glue that sticks

everything together and my mom was

chiming in with it's way bad you don't

want to do it you don't want to end up

like that over three million people

worldwide will die this year to alcohol

related causes from baby showers

christenings freshers week weddings

parties funerals barbecues celebrations

and everything in between that so she's

in my ear making it sound really logical

to not do it and I'm watching people act

the fool are doing it we've been

brainwashed into thinking that there are

just two types of drinkers there are

those at Rock Bottom alcohol dependent

and there's everybody else happy social

drinkers who are just occasionally a bit

lightweight and can't hold their beer

you do stupid things when you're drunk

you hurt yourself you compromise your

health it's really hard on the people

around you tend to turn into a liar and

it screws up your life yeah it's like

yeah but it's pretty fun yeah well it is

but you need something better than that

uh and I burned every bridge that I had

virtually unemployable my options have

been eliminated my life was eviscerated

my family didn't want anything to do

with me I lost my friendships I had no

way forward in fact the reality is very

different it's a spectrum I would highly

recommend you get off the booze elevator

before it hits rock bottom

and I just continued to dig that hole

deeper and deeper and deeper until one

day I had that moment that you hear with

people who are in recovery that that

Moment of clarity where I realized I

just couldn't live this way any longer

my elevator had you know gone down to

the bottom floor

and uh and the and and I met my paint

threshold you know back to the the the

this thesis around pain like I had

um reached a point where I could no

longer tolerate the pain of my current

situation and the fear the pain

associated with the fear of change was

eclipsed by the pain that I was feeling

in that moment and that's what motivated

me to change I went to a treatment

center uh where I lived for a hundred

days which is pretty long time to be in

a rehab center and I did that because I

knew if I didn't get this right that my

life was done you know and so I took

that opportunity seriously I recognized

that despite the fact that I think I'm a

smart guy my best thinking had me

literally institutionalized and that if

I couldn't get a grasp on how to live

and develop some new skills and and a

new toolbox for how to approach my life

that

um that I was going to end up in jail or

I was going to kill somebody else or my

self

you know now we're about a year and a

half later and it's and my life has been

has turned around immeasurably it's a

wonderful thing and I I say to anybody

watching or you're listening to this

that you know it's um

that there is a lot of pressure on young

people not to drink necessarily but to

find happiness through going out and

getting mashed like like and and I'm

sure and that's fun and you have a good

time and good luck to you but if it

doesn't work for you and if you keep

waking up going hmm I don't seem to be

having nearly as good time as most of my

friends uh then you know then think

about it it doesn't have to be something

you do is what I all I say to people and

what's better isn't being straight and

and and and not making mistakes it's

like that's all Prohibition in some

sense what's better is no you need an

adventure man you need to get out there

and have something to do and and

something worth waking up for and you

need that's the substitute for the

addiction excessive drinking is is

considered 13 or more drinks a week if

you have three glasses of wine every

night which would be splitting a bottle

of wine with your friend your your

husband whatever uh you you following

that category an alcoholic is defined as

someone basically where they they they

can't stop once they start often they'll

drink until they pass out wow or they'll

drink to where they become dysfunctional

they become the kind of person everyone

goes my God you're slurring your words

you're not safe to drive they get DUIs

their boss has trouble like you need to

quit coming to work hungover but an

excessive Drinker is 13. if you drink

six drinks a week if you're a woman you

have a 40 higher incidence of breast

cancer if you drink up to 10 drinks it

goes up to 70 percent higher chance of

getting it's incredible cancer so just

the health benefits one of the things

that's coming out of of England is

research that if you stop drinking for

30 days just cut back and what they're

finding is people are living longer

that's clearing out their kidneys it's

arterial sclerosis is being reversed you

know people are having all kinds of um

more energy they're losing weight most

of the things that we do that are

addictions are to numb out our anxiety

to numb out our pain to numb out the

member memories of trauma to numb out

our discomfort around being people in a

social being with people in a social

situation the fear that I won't have fun

I won't be interesting I'm more relaxed

I'm more fun you know and that's the big

myth is I won't have a fun life there's

something about my mom she has a way of

like making it sound like a really bad

idea and my I had a lot of aunts and

uncles and second cousins and stuff that

were all alcoholics drug addicts and

watching them I thought that is not a

good look real like some real white

trashy stuff yeah and so I was just like

no and my mom was chiming in with it's

way bad you don't want to do it you

don't want to end up like that so she's

in my ear making it sound really logical

to not do it and I'm watching people act

a fool who are doing it so I just

thought yeah when I thought I was gonna

have kids I wanted to ask my mom like

you were so good like neither my sister

or I ever got into trouble we never did

drugs we never drank no trouble nothing

my sister to this day is like the most

straight narrow person so when you tried

it what was it like for you look at it

oh alcohol made me feel like I was

suppressing the urge to dance on the

table it is awesome and I love it the

most I just don't let myself do it

because it's not in it's not congruent

with wanting to live forever there's

just too many downsides but that [ __ ] is

fun so like I get how people get in

trouble I just don't have an addictive

personality so for me it was easy to be

like yeah this is fun but I can weigh it

against the disadvantages and there are

way too many

unlike a lot of substances and drugs

that actually attach to the surface of

cells to receptors alcohol actually has

its own Direct effects on cells because

it can really just pass into those cells

and the fact that it can pass into so

many organs and cells so easily is

really what explains its damaging

effects ethanol produces substantial

damage to cells because when you ingest

ethanol it has to be converted into

something else because it is toxic to

the body and if you thought ethanol was

bad acetyl aldehyde is particularly bad

acetyl aldehyde is poison it will kill

cells it damages and kills cells and is

indiscriminate as to which cells it

damages and kills that's a problem

obviously and the body deals with that

problem by using another component of

the NAD biochemical Pathway to convert

acetyl aldehyde into something called

acetate acetate is actually something

that your body can use as fuel and that

process of going from ethanol to acetyl

aldehyde to acetate

does involve the production of a toxic

molecule right again acetyl aldehyde is

really toxic if your body can't do this

conversion of ethanol to acetyl aldehyde

to acetate fast enough well acetyl

aldehyde will build up in your body and

cause more damage so it's important that

your body be able to do this conversion

very quickly and the place where it does

that is within the liver and cells

within the liver are very good at this

conversion process but they are cells

and they are exposed to the acetyl

aldehyde in the conversion process and

so cells within the liver really take a

beating in the alcohol metabolism events

it is the poison the acetylaldehyde

itself that leads to the effect of being

inebriated or drunk I think most people

don't realize that that being drunk is

actually a poison-induced disruption in

the way that your neural circuits work

no amount about all is safe drinking

alcoholic beverages can be harmful to

our health it's the most damaging drug

to society as a whole the danger goes up

with every additional drink alcohol is

actually considered a class one

carcinogen or cancer-causing agent so

that's the same category as Benzene and

tobacco smoke it is the poison the

acetylaldehyde itself that leads to the

effect of being inebriated or drunk

Canadian Health authorities had

previously said that a low risk amount

of alcohol was about 10 drinks per week

your risks start to increase at one

standard rate per week even just seven

glasses one across the week there is

going to be some degeneration of your

brain in response to that alcohol intake

I was wanting to be a certain person but

making all the wrong decisions citing

some of this research about alcohol's

impacts suggested lowering that to two

drinks per week in Western cultures

alcohol is the most harmful drug overall

because it's the most harmful drug to

society because it's the most why they

use drug a very small percentage of

individuals in the world can quit

anything on their own and really our

main message is that less is better you

know when it comes to health you know

less is more what do we know about

alcohol's impact on us alcohol is one of

the leading Behavior related causes of

health problems and deaths and also some

social problems and economic costs

ranging from things like injuries and

accidents to Cancers and actually heart

and cardiovascular disease shoveling

alcohol hiding away the problems has

been something we've been very become

very expert at but the really sad

statistic is that only 10 percent of

people

from an alcohol use disorder seek

treatment I hit rock bottom I got lost

in the sauce of drinking out of those 10

of the people only one will have any

form of long-term success this is why I

don't like alcohol and this is why I

don't like drugs because I don't you're

you're not in control a substance is

doing that and that means 90 of people

who are suffering right now aren't going

to seek treatment and you know why

they're not going to seek treatment it's

been told that all they can do is quit

and go to meetings for the rest of their

life

I remember having a conversation with

Patrick one night he picked me up in his

car and was sitting together

and it was awkward silence for a good

15-20 minutes So eventually one of my

friends who was going through it bad I

was at the prison to pick him up I'm

sitting outside till three o'clock in

the morning

finally he gets out gets in a car this

was like his fourth or 50 UI we didn't

say anything to each other and we're

driving home and I don't say anything to

him and he says uh hey Pat how come

you're not saying anything to me I said

I said you know just to be honest with

me I just see you being in pain finally

I said

I don't know why

I choose to do what I'm doing and he

says you always have a choice and he

says you always have a choice and we

started talking a little bit about we

started talking a little bit two words

about he said you know

perspective words change everything and

those two words change everything for me

but as we were having a conversation I

just want to see you get out of this

thing I don't know what you're going

through but you're in pain and I hope

you realize there's value to life I

don't know how to help you I don't have

a method the only thing I know is what

I've seen others go through whether it's

AAA and all these other programs he went

into asking me who I want to be what do

I want to do and we just went through a

whole conversation

and it was a human conversation it was a

people conversation it was no business

no numbers it was just relationship but

uh I hope you figure out a way to get

through this do you know that I love you

yes you think I care about you yes do

you think I want the best for you yes

do you want to be friends long term yes

are we family yes

do you want to change

and that's the one where I got stuck

you have to want to change if you're

struggling with some kind of addiction

like I was

[Music]

it's not easy to say that

but I wanted to change I just didn't

know how and eventually he figured out a

way to get through it and he's doing

great he's changed his life you know in

a completely different way yeah but what

you said to him people

aware of that

and it's visceral because people don't

want it to be true there were two things

I would say about this

the first is both a conscious and a

subconscious level people are fearful of

other drugs illegal drugs

because it helps deflect their attention

away from them the problems of alcohol

at a personal level but also at a

political level

politicians love to get hysterical about

a new drug because it means they can do

something about drugs and they don't

have to be held to account over their

failure to deal with the problems of

alcohol right so that's the first and

second thing

is that

I would say that there's almost

no family in Britain if you look at an

extended family three generations

which doesn't have someone

who's been damaged by alcohol

through addiction through violence

traffic accidents or being a victim

because of someone else who was drunk

environment almost every family in

Britain is affected but we don't own up

to it right we kind of push under the

carpet you know we we know there's a

problem but we don't talk about it

because

you don't know what to do about it we're

embarrassed and so that shoveling

alcohol you know hiding hiding away the

problems has been something we've been

very become very expert at we know the

pharmacology of alcohol in the brain and

how it does that it's we can we can

explain an enormous amount of what's

going on with alcohol right you know I

mean to me

I find that quite exciting because you

know it's a as a brain scientist that's

what I want to understand I want to

sound the brain and alcohol is a very

interesting probe of different brain

systems

the changes we see underpin the effects

of alcohol you know are irrelevant to

all sorts of disorders they're relevant

disorders like Sleep Disorders epilepsy

relevant to anxiety depression this drug

which you can just go and buy in the

shops can produce these enormous changes

in people's lives

[Music]

Sometimes some habits can turn into

Lifestyles and certain Lifestyles don't

lead to all the benefits and all the

amazing things that life has to offer

some Lifestyles lead to very dark paths

a depression anxiety stress and if not

controlled can also lead to some of the

worst case scenarios out there in life

one of them being never Reaching Your

Capacity never really having an identity

or a self-worth losing all Integrity all

dignity and losing yourself just a few

years ago I was in a very dark place in

my life

they say that depression comes from the

inability to construct the future in

your mind I can see the future I didn't

know who I was supposed to be I was

wanting to be a certain person but

making all the wrong decisions I made a

lot of mistakes when it comes to alcohol

itself which is something that I was

struggling with at the time it went

slowly from being a Work Hard Play Hard

have a drink to two drinks to three

drinks so then a habit to then a daily

Habit to then a 24 7 Habit to then a

every weekend habit getting lost in

myself habit sometimes if you don't

watch the kind of habits that you're

building they become Lifestyles before I

knew it I was digging myself a hole and

everywhere I looked it was so dark

and I lost myself I spiraled into a

sense of no self-worth and I struggled a

lot and nobody knew I hit rock bottom to

the point where I almost lost my job to

the point where

some people had to have very tough

conversations with me

some friends had to deal with my

drama

and they say hurting people hurt people

I was hurting inside and I was hurting

others and didn't even know it

[Music]

thank you

foreign

[Music]