UP Cebu’s Valedictorian for the class of 2024, Jethro Sia Modequillo

Summary

The speaker reflects on their delayed graduation due to self-imposed pressure to excel without mistakes, leading to burnout. They express gratitude for parents who never burdened them with expectations, allowing them to learn and grow freely. The speech advocates for a learning environment free from expectations, where mistakes are celebrated as part of the process, encouraging personal fulfillment over societal pressures.

Takeaways

• 🎓 The speaker's graduation was delayed due to self-imposed pressure to excel without making mistakes.
• 🔥 This pressure led to burnout and resentment, causing the speaker to stop attending classes and struggle with work.
• 🚫 The speaker felt trapped by expectations, both from others and self-imposed, which hindered their progress.
• 🤔 The realization that doing well was seen as the bare minimum and doing poorly as failure took a long time to overcome.
• 🙏 Gratitude is expressed to parents who never burdened the speaker with expectations of success.
• 🌱 The absence of parental expectations provided emotional freedom and a valuable life lesson.
• 💡 People can perform better without the weight of expectations, allowing for exploration, learning, and growth.
• 🎉 Embracing mistakes is encouraged as it signifies active engagement in learning and curiosity about the world.
• 🚫 Avoiding challenges and growth to prevent mistakes is discouraged as it limits one's potential.
• 🏆 The speaker acknowledges being the valedictorian but questions its long-term significance.
• 💪 The advice to the audience is to pursue fulfillment, learn from failures, and not to act out of expectations or fear.

Q & A

Why was the speaker's graduation delayed by a year?

The speaker's graduation was delayed due to the pressure they put on themselves to succeed and excel without making mistakes, which led to burnout and resentment.

What was the impact of the pressure on the speaker's academic performance?

The pressure resulted in the speaker's inability to attend classes and complete work, feeling that nothing they did was ever good enough, and experiencing fear of expectations.

How did the speaker's parents contribute to their perspective on success?

The speaker's parents taught them a valuable lesson by never burdening them with expectations of success, which allowed the speaker to feel free from the pressure to constantly perform at a high level.

What lesson does the speaker wish they had learned earlier?

The speaker wishes they had been more forgiving to themselves and learned to handle success and failure without the burden of expectations.

According to the speaker, what is the ideal environment for people to do their best?

The speaker believes people can do better when they are free from expectations, have space to succeed and fail, and are encouraged to explore, learn, and experiment.

Why does the speaker think making mistakes is important?

Making mistakes is important because it signifies active engagement in learning, curiosity about the world, and an attempt to understand it, even if it's complex.

What advice does the speaker give regarding handling failure?

The speaker advises not to let fear of failure dictate actions, but to do things that bring fulfillment and to be open to learning from failures.

How does the speaker feel about their status as valedictorian?

While the speaker is grateful for being the valedictorian, they don't believe it will matter significantly in the long term and caution against doing things out of pressure or fear.

What is the speaker's view on the role of expectations in personal growth?

The speaker views expectations as a hindrance to personal growth, suggesting that they can limit one's ability to challenge themselves, expand their horizons, and reach their potential.

What message does the speaker want to convey to the audience about expectations and personal fulfillment?

The speaker wants the audience to understand that they should pursue activities that bring them fulfillment, regardless of external expectations or pressures, and to embrace failure as a part of the learning process.

Outlines

00:00

🎓 Overcoming Self-Imposed Pressure

The speaker shares their experience of delaying their graduation by a year due to the immense pressure they put on themselves to succeed without making mistakes. This self-inflicted pressure led to burnout and resentment, causing them to avoid classes and struggle with their work. They felt that any success was merely the minimum expectation, while failure was intolerable. The speaker expresses gratitude for their parents' lack of expectations, which allowed them to learn and grow without the burden of external pressures. They emphasize the importance of being forgiving to oneself and the freedom that comes from not being bound by expectations, which enables true learning and exploration. The speaker concludes by encouraging others to pursue their endeavors without the fear of failure and to embrace mistakes as part of the learning process.

Keywords

💡Graduation

Graduation refers to the act of receiving a diploma or academic degree, marking the successful completion of a course of study. In the video, the speaker's graduation was delayed due to self-imposed pressure, illustrating the theme of the unintended consequences of striving for perfection.

💡Burnout

Burnout is a state of physical or emotional exhaustion often accompanied by a sense of reduced accomplishment and loss of interest in activities. The speaker mentions experiencing burnout as a result of the pressure to succeed, highlighting the detrimental effects of excessive expectations on mental health.

💡Resentment

Resentment is a feeling of persistent ill-will or indignation towards someone or something regarded as unjustly causing injury or harm. The script describes resentment as a byproduct of the speaker's self-inflicted pressure, indicating how unrealistic expectations can lead to negative emotions.

💡Self-inflicted

Self-inflicted refers to something that one brings upon oneself, often unnecessarily. The term is used to describe the pressure the speaker put on themselves, emphasizing the internalized nature of the stress that led to their academic delay.

💡Expectations

Expectations are beliefs about what will or should happen in the future. The speaker discusses the burden of expectations, both from themselves and others, and how they can hinder personal growth and learning, suggesting that a lack of expectations can be liberating.

💡Academic Excellence

Academic excellence refers to outstanding performance in educational pursuits. The speaker mentions chasing academic excellence but also reflects on the importance of being free from the pressure of such pursuits, suggesting a balance between striving for success and maintaining personal well-being.

💡Fulfillment

Fulfillment is a state of being satisfied and pleased, often as a result of one's achievements or the meeting of one's needs. The speaker advises doing things for fulfillment rather than out of pressure or fear, indicating that personal satisfaction should be a guiding principle in one's actions.

💡Mistakes

Mistakes are errors or faults resulting from poor judgment, inadequate skills, or incorrect information. The speaker encourages embracing mistakes as part of the learning process, arguing that they signify engagement with the world and a willingness to learn from failures.

💡Curiosity

Curiosity is the desire to learn or know more about something. It is mentioned in the context of making mistakes, suggesting that curiosity drives exploration and understanding, even when it leads to errors.

💡Potential

Potential refers to the capacity to develop or to become something in the future. The speaker warns against the avoidance of mistakes as a way to not reach one's potential, implying that challenging oneself and making mistakes are essential for growth.

💡Celebration

Celebration is the act of acknowledging a significant event or achievement with enjoyment and pride. The speaker suggests that being wrong should be celebrated like being right, as it signifies active engagement in learning and personal development.

Highlights

Graduation was delayed due to self-imposed pressure to succeed without mistakes.

Self-inflicted pressure led to burnout and resentment, affecting academic performance.

The realization that high expectations only led to fear of failure.

A shift in perspective towards being more forgiving to oneself.

Gratitude expressed to parents for not burdening with expectations of success.

The importance of being free from expectations to truly succeed.

Space to succeed and fail is crucial for learning and exploration.

Celebrating being wrong as much as being right encourages learning.

Making mistakes is a sign of active engagement in learning and curiosity.

Avoiding mistakes equates to avoiding personal growth and potential.

The speaker's status as valedictorian is not expected to matter in the long term.

Advice to not act out of expectations, pressure, or fear of failure.

Encouragement to pursue activities that bring personal fulfillment.

Embracing failure as a part of learning and growth.

The speech concludes with an open invitation to learn from failures.

Transcripts

my graduation was delayed by a year

because I stopped in the middle of

Co a big reason for that was the

pressure that I put on myself to succeed

to Excel and to never make mistakes as

if any of that junk was

important all that pressure gave me was

burnout and resentment most of it was

self-inflicted I stopped showing uper

classes I couldn't accomplish any work

because nothing I did was ever good

enough and I was terrified of the

expectations that people had for me

expectations that I had for

myself at some point I started feeling

like if I did well then that was just

the bare minimum and if I did poorly

then that was unacceptable failure

charlan it took me a long time and a lot

of work to get over that feeling but

what I got out of that experience was

this I wish that I was more forgiving to

myself I am extremely grateful to have

parents who taught me that lesson in all

my life despite me chasing academic

Excellence they have never burdened me

with expectations of

success I have never heard them say you

should be honors you should be KL you

should succeed so that that we can show

you

off never have I heard that once not

once in my

life and I don't think I've expressed to

them yet how much the lack of

expectations has freed my heart so a

huge thank you to my mother and

[Applause]

father I strongly believe that people

can do better when they do so without

expectations

when they're given space to succeed and

fail and explore and learn when they're

free to experiment and to play when

being wrong is worthy of Celebration

like being right because making mistakes

means you're actively engaged in the

process of learning mistakes mean you're

curious about the world and you are

trying to understand it even if it's far

more complicated than any of us could

ever hope to

comprehend the only way you could avoid

mistakes is if you never challenge

yourself never expand your horizons and

never reach your

potential I'm grateful to be valid

dictorian but I don't think this will

matter in 10 years or even 5 years maybe

one

year don't make my

mistakes don't do things out of

expectations or pressure or fear of

failure do things because they bring you

fulfillment whatever it is you'll do

next do what you can and learn from what

you can't be open to your failure