These 17 minutes will teach you what schools NEVER Taught

Summary

In this video, the speaker reflects on the concept of 'working on yourself,' drawing from personal experiences and diary entries. They recount a pivotal moment in their past when they were challenged to identify their strengths and weaknesses, leading to a realization about self-awareness. The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-acceptance, recognizing one's unique abilities, and not being defined by societal expectations or academic achievements. They encourage viewers to embrace their individuality, pursue passions without excessive pressure, and find joy in personal growth, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling life.

Takeaways

• 😀 The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-improvement and understanding one's strengths and weaknesses.
• 📚 Reflecting on past experiences, like reviewing old diaries, can provide insights into personal growth.
• 🤔 The concept of identifying a positive aspect of one's weaknesses was introduced during a CA course, highlighting the need for a balanced self-assessment.
• 👨‍🎓 The speaker recounts feeling timid and not recognizing their strengths during school, which is a common experience for many.
• 🏆 Despite not being a top student, the speaker was involved in various extracurricular activities, indicating that success is multifaceted.
• 🌟 The realization that one's value is not solely defined by academic or professional achievements is a key takeaway.
• 💡 The speaker encourages embracing one's unique skills and talents, rather than striving to fit a societal mold.
• 🚀 Accepting oneself and one's capabilities is the first step towards self-improvement and achieving personal goals.
• 💼 The speaker discusses the pressures of societal expectations and the importance of finding one's own path, even if it diverges from traditional success metrics.
• 🌱 The idea of 'Law of Reversed Effort' is introduced, suggesting that减压 and self-acceptance can lead to better performance and outcomes.
• 🌟 The video concludes with a message of hope and self-belief, encouraging viewers to be happy and confident in their potential for greatness.

Q & A

What is the main theme of the video script?

The main theme of the video script is self-improvement and self-acceptance. It emphasizes the importance of recognizing one's strengths, overcoming self-doubt, and working on personal growth without being overly critical or pressured by societal expectations.

Why did the speaker feel pressured during the NCA course?

The speaker felt pressured during the NCA course because they were asked to write their strengths and weaknesses, and they struggled to identify their strengths due to a lack of self-awareness and self-confidence, which was a result of not being taught to recognize their own strengths in school.

What was the speaker's realization about their own strengths after reflecting on their past?

After reflecting on their past, the speaker realized that they had many strengths that were not academic, such as being good at dance, singing, and creative pursuits, but these were not recognized or valued in the traditional academic setting.

How did the speaker's attitude towards self-improvement change over time?

The speaker's attitude towards self-improvement evolved from feeling inadequate and focusing on weaknesses to accepting and embracing their unique strengths. They learned to appreciate their individuality and to work on personal growth without the pressure of being a 'topper' or conforming to societal norms.

What is the 'Law of Reversed Effort' mentioned in the script?

The 'Law of Reversed Effort' refers to the psychological phenomenon where the more pressure one puts on themselves to achieve a goal, the less likely they are to perform well. It suggests that removing the pressure and being more relaxed can lead to better outcomes.

Why did the speaker feel they were not good enough during their school years?

The speaker felt they were not good enough during their school years because they were constantly compared to others based on academic performance and did not receive recognition for their non-academic strengths, leading to a belief in their own inadequacy.

What advice does the speaker give for those who are struggling to find their path in life?

The speaker advises those struggling to find their path to accept themselves as they are, recognize their unique strengths, and not to be overly pressured by societal expectations or the need to conform to a certain standard of success.

How does the speaker describe the process of 'working on yourself'?

The speaker describes 'working on yourself' as a process of self-discovery, self-acceptance, and focusing on personal growth without the pressure of being perfect or comparing oneself to others.

What is the significance of the speaker's experience with an intern reading their diary?

The experience of an intern reading the speaker's diary and mocking them was significant because it highlighted the speaker's insecurities and lack of self-confidence. It served as a catalyst for the speaker to reflect on their self-worth and to start their journey of self-improvement.

How does the speaker relate to the audience as an 'average' person?

The speaker relates to the audience as an 'average' person by sharing their own struggles, insecurities, and the process of discovering their strengths. They use their experiences to connect with others who might feel the same way and to encourage them to embrace their individuality.

What is the speaker's perspective on the importance of self-belief in achieving success?

The speaker believes that self-belief is crucial for success. They emphasize the need to own oneself, to believe in one's capabilities, and to approach life with confidence and a positive attitude, even when faced with challenges or setbacks.

Outlines

00:00

🔍 Self-Reflection and Personal Growth

The speaker begins by addressing the audience and sharing their personal journey of self-improvement. They recount an incident from their past where they were unable to identify their strengths during a course on communication. This led to a period of introspection where they realized the importance of recognizing and working on one's strengths. The speaker emphasizes the need to understand oneself, accept one's weaknesses, and focus on personal growth rather than comparing oneself to others.

05:01

🌱 Embracing Individuality and Self-Acceptance

In this paragraph, the speaker delves into the concept of self-improvement, challenging the notion that one must be perfect to be valuable. They share their struggles with self-doubt and the pressure to conform to societal expectations. The speaker encourages the audience to embrace their individuality, accept their imperfections, and work on self-improvement with a positive mindset. They share their own experiences of overcoming self-doubt and finding success by focusing on their unique strengths and passions.

10:02

🚀 Discovering Strengths and Pursuing Passion

The speaker discusses the importance of identifying and nurturing one's strengths. They share their personal realization that it took them 26 years to understand their own strengths and how they could use them to contribute positively to their life and work. The speaker advocates for a mindset shift from self-deprecation to self-appreciation, suggesting that this change can lead to greater enjoyment and success in one's endeavors. They also touch on the idea of making calculated decisions and not being overly pressured by societal standards of success.

15:03

💪 Overcoming Pressure and Finding Inner Confidence

In the final paragraph, the speaker reflects on the paradox of life where pressure and desperation can hinder success, while a relaxed and confident approach can lead to better outcomes. They share their own experiences of performing well in interviews and life by not being desperate and by owning their abilities. The speaker concludes by encouraging the audience to stop viewing themselves as defective and to instead focus on their strengths, be happy, and believe in their potential for greatness, emphasizing that average individuals can often outperform high achievers in real-life situations.

Keywords

💡Self-improvement

Self-improvement refers to the process of personal development and growth through learning, reflection, and taking actions to enhance one's skills, abilities, and character. In the video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of recognizing one's strengths and weaknesses and focusing on enhancing the former. The speaker's journey from not knowing their strengths to embracing them and working on self-improvement is a central theme, illustrated by their past experiences and the realization that they were more than just their academic achievements.

💡Strengths and Weaknesses

Strengths and weaknesses are personal attributes that define one's capabilities and limitations. The video script uses the concept to highlight the need for self-awareness and the positive reframing of weaknesses. The speaker recounts an exercise from a course where they were asked to list their strengths and weaknesses, and to find a positive aspect of each weakness, which is a strategy for self-improvement and a shift in perspective towards one's abilities.

💡Confidence

Confidence is the self-assurance and belief in one's own abilities. In the video, the speaker discusses the importance of having confidence in oneself, even when facing challenges or feeling inadequate. They share personal experiences of feeling timid and lacking confidence, and how building self-confidence was crucial for their personal and professional growth.

💡Passion

Passion is a strong and barely controllable emotion or enthusiasm for something. The speaker in the video encourages viewers to pursue their passions without putting excessive pressure on themselves. They argue that passion should be nurtured and enjoyed, rather than being a source of stress, which aligns with the broader message of self-acceptance and the pursuit of personal fulfillment.

💡Pressure

Pressure refers to the stress or strain one feels to perform or achieve something. The video script discusses the negative impact of self-imposed pressure and societal expectations on personal well-being. The speaker shares their own experiences of feeling pressured to succeed academically and professionally, and how learning to let go of this pressure led to better performance and mental health.

💡Acceptance

Acceptance is the act of embracing or approving of something, often oneself or one's circumstances. The video emphasizes the importance of self-acceptance as a foundation for self-improvement. The speaker talks about their journey from feeling like a 'defective piece' to accepting their unique strengths and weaknesses, which is a pivotal moment in their personal growth.

💡Fear

Fear is an emotion induced by a perceived threat or danger. In the context of the video, fear is presented as an obstacle that can hinder personal growth and self-expression. The speaker shares how they overcame fear and anxiety, particularly in professional settings, by changing their mindset and focusing on self-ownership and self-belief.

💡Ownership

Ownership here refers to the act of taking responsibility for oneself and one's actions. The speaker in the video talks about the significance of owning oneself, which means acknowledging one's abilities and taking pride in one's unique qualities. This concept is integral to the video's message of self-improvement and the empowerment that comes from self-acceptance.

💡Paradox of Life

The 'paradox of life' mentioned in the video refers to the counterintuitive nature of certain life experiences, such as the idea that letting go of pressure can lead to better outcomes. The speaker uses this concept to illustrate how removing the pressure to succeed can lead to greater success and happiness, which is a central theme in the video's message about self-improvement and mental well-being.

💡Content Creation

Content creation is the process of producing various forms of content, such as videos, articles, or other media. In the video, the speaker discusses their journey into content creation, particularly on social media, as a way to express themselves and connect with others. This keyword is significant as it represents the speaker's path to self-discovery and the sharing of their experiences to inspire and help others.

💡Average Children

The term 'average children' is used in the video to refer to those who may not stand out academically but have other strengths and talents. The speaker identifies with this group and uses their own experiences to challenge the notion that academic performance is the sole measure of success. This keyword is significant as it underscores the video's message of recognizing and valuing diverse strengths and the potential for success beyond traditional metrics.

Highlights

The importance of understanding the concept of 'working on yourself'.

The speaker's personal experience of self-reflection through old diaries.

An anecdote from a CA course about identifying strengths and weaknesses.

The realization of not knowing one's strengths due to a lack of self-improvement.

The impact of school life on self-perception and the discovery of personal strengths.

The speaker's journey from feeling inadequate to embracing their unique abilities.

The idea that societal expectations can limit our understanding of our own capabilities.

The transformative power of self-acceptance and the decision to not see oneself as 'trash'.

The paradox of life and how减压 can lead to better performance and opportunities.

The concept of 'Law of Reversed Effort' and its application in achieving goals.

The speaker's advice on not pressurizing oneself and the benefits of a balanced approach to life.

The idea that everyone has strengths and weaknesses, and the importance of self-awareness.

The speaker's personal transformation and the decision to focus on their creative strengths.

The message that it's never too late to discover and work on one's strengths.

The importance of calculated decisions and the role of chance in life's journey.

The conclusion that average children can also achieve great success in life.

Transcripts

Hello, how are you?

Tell me what fun is going on in your life in the comment

section.

How are you? I am absolutely fine.

I know I am making a video after a long time.

I just check the comment section of YouTube.

So Srishti Raheja has asked a question that everyone just

say work on yourself.

But what does it mean?

You tell us once.

Whatever is being said, you also say work on yourself.

What work should we do on ourselves?

Pretty valid question.

So the answer to this is related to this.

I have a habit that I take out my old diaries and see what

I used to think when

I get something good in my old diaries.

So I got a diary like this.

Which is

In our CA, before the final exam there was a course called

NCA's course.

Like communication related, where faculties come and tell

you some behavioral things.

They will tell you behavioral things about you.

Some sort of that.

So once it was 15 days.

On day 10, a faculty came.

They asked a question.

You write your strengths and weaknesses.

Along with that, you have to write a positive point of your

weakness.

Now, at that time, my situation was

This is about 2018.

What did I do that day?

I told them to write strength and weakness.

And like I was sitting like this.

One side of me was like this.

One side was like this.

And I found myself that when this question came

I have not yet written the answer to this.

I was looking around the kids.

What are they writing?

Then the time was up.

Then they started asking one by one.

Then I was listening to others.

Like someone was saying that I am a discipline.

Then I was thinking in my list that I will write discipline.

Then someone else said something.

Then I thought I will say this.

Today, when I was able to recall that day.

I was thinking this.

That day I felt a little in the evening.

But because I was not in such a self-improvement.

I was a timid child.

So I did not pay much attention to it.

But that day I was able to think.

No one told us in school.

That we have some strength.

I was able to think about weakness.

What is wrong with me?

That I am not very good at studying.

Or I am not able to talk to anyone confidently.

Or my English is not good.

Or my dressing sense is not very good.

Ask me about weakness.

But when it comes to strength.

That day I felt that I was looking around.

What is my strength?

How old am I?

How old will you guess from this?

I don't even remember my age.

How old will I be? 22-23 years old.

So a 22-23 year old child.

Does not know his strength.

His whole school is over.

Because no one told him so much in school.

Yesterday I was sitting and recalling.

How my school life was.

So every time I used to write something on my report card.

Every time.

There was no section of remarks below.

Remarks came.

Even my mother used to write.

You can do better.

Till date, no teacher has stopped and told.

What better I can do.

Maybe I am a kind of student.

I was like this.

Dance competition, singing competition,

Handwriting competition, musical chair.

On the spot poetry.

Things like this.

I was good at all this.

I used to get certificates in everything.

But my marks were not like that.

My photo was in the magazine.

I was not like that.

So I was getting average marks.

But in school.

We always go to the test.

That how good I am in that.

So always I used to feel.

That something is less in me.

I mean, I don't have any strength.

Because I don't come in first, second, third.

Or I don't come in the top kids.

I have a lot of weaknesses.

So I always knew this.

No one used to tell me.

That this is a good thing.

But later.

When I met people outside.

When I started to understand things.

When I started to own myself.

Then I felt like this.

This was when I was in school.

When I went to the job.

When I was doing my article shift.

I saw a stand up comedy.

I related it completely.

I used to feel that one day.

Everyone will know that I don't know anything.

I used to get a call.

To ask Neha to come in with the diary.

I used to go.

They used to brief me.

Like in my article shift.

They used to brief me.

That this is the client's data.

Take this from there.

Print it out.

I used to listen to everything.

I used to come in.

I used to ask the ma'am.

What did sir say?

She used to say that I don't know.

When I went new.

I didn't understand that.

I didn't understand that.

I used to write to her.

How to open 26AS.

One day.

An intern read my diary.

She mocked me.

She mocked me.

She said that you write so little.

Yes I write.

I didn't understand.

I didn't know that much.

I used to think that I am poor.

I didn't understand that.

If I don't get good marks.

Then I don't get good marks.

If I don't enjoy office work.

Then I don't enjoy office work.

I have so many other things.

Which I am good at.

Here I am expressing my heart.

In clear words.

I talk relatable.

Like I am a kid.

There are many kids like me.

I am good in expressing what I do.

I am good with my words.

I have the curiosity to learn.

Things beyond the text book.

No one told me these things.

When you are not doing like everyone.

When you are not doing like everyone.

Then the world will never believe.

That you can be different.

That you are useless.

There is no concept of being different.

When it comes to work on yourself.

When it comes to work on yourself.

You need to see who you are.

You need to see who you are.

Work on yourself.

I am trash.

I want to become a diamond out of it.

I want to become a diamond out of it.

I am not trash.

Please accept it.

When we read self improvement books.

Or go for self improvement.

What is the intention behind it?

What is the intention behind it?

I have everything bad.

I have everything bad.

One day I told my mom.

One day I told my mom.

I told my mom.

I told her.

Always.

Always.

Always.

Always.

Always.

Always.

Always.

Always.

Always.

Always.

Always.

I told my mom at manager's office.

I was not a topper but still I thought let's do it, it was

my first victory that I at least attempted.

You know the whole world keeps judging that you are a

topper, I am not a topper, I didn't get a trophy in

everything, yes I just got a participation certificate, so

what is my value? So first of all, the work on yourself or

self-improvement that I have

to do, don't do it with the intention that I am a topper, I

am not a topper.

Do you know when my life has changed?

Now we are sitting here and you think we are sitting here

and talking big.

Remove all your knowledge, I mean I have discovered these

things over the period of time but from where it all

started, with just one thought and maybe a decision, I no

more feel that

I am trash.

I said I won't believe that I am trash.

Because I have seen in life that until we consider

ourselves trash, useless, nothing will happen to us, we

keep believing that we are poor, the world will prove you

every day that I am not doing you against the world.

But it happens.

Now I came here in the video and got scared that I don't

know what I will say in the next 10 minutes, you will close

the video and go when you don't know why should we listen

to you.

I came laughing and confidently said what I wanted to say

and you listened to me.

Isn't it?

So where does work on yourself start? First with this

intention or this decision that I am not that bad, I am

okay, where do

I want to go in life or what dreams do I see for myself,

for that I have to fix some things.

Not everyone is perfect.

I don't understand a lot of things either.

I came to social media, I didn't learn content creation

like this.

I had some things in my mind that means the average child

who always wants to say, so

I used to represent such an average student on social media.

So when I came, I came from the failure kid.

So I wanted to come and tell you that it is not that the

top will do everything, we can also do something.

So it's okay, the world, don't teach us more.

So I came from that attitude.

I had a lot of things to say, I said, I kept saying, people

kept meeting, we kept learning things.

It is not like that even now, I still don't understand

taxes.

Being a charted accountant, I don't understand taxes very

much.

If you don't know, you don't know.

There may be another charted accountant who is very good at

taxes, but their communication skills are not good.

But society has always come.

The world is still on the same number.

The world has reached the moon.

They have also got the first attempt.

So I don't know a lot of things.

I don't understand a lot of finances.

I don't understand a lot of taxes.

I have been in the world for 25-26 years. I accepted at the

age of 30 that I have a creative mind and I should put my

mind there to flourish.

I used to curse myself that don't judge a fish's ability to

climb a tree, that it will climb a tree like a monkey.

No, it is made to live in water, why do you have to make it

climb a tree?

So when I accepted that there is nothing wrong in my life,

I am not a fraud that everyone will know that I don't know

how to work, I am just different.

I have a different skill set and that is my strength.

So it took me 26 years to find out my strength.

In the 26th year, I understood that this is my strength and

I will work more on my strength so that I will be able to

do something good in the future, not in the eyes of the

world but in my own eyes.

So when I work now, I enjoy it a lot.

Someone asks me that do you practice, do you do a job?

I do what I feel like.

I do what I feel good.

I was blessed enough to have this liberty that I can do the

things I like but at the same time I also took some

decisions which I felt were right for me, I could not see

what would happen next but they were calculative decisions

but I took them according

to my own.

Even now if I do a workshop, I make money, I don't think

that I have to do a workshop every month, I have to earn so

much money.

When I feel like doing something, I will do it.

And do you know what we feel?

Now if I tell someone to do what you feel like, they will

feel that do what you feel good, we will go out to do it

and what if we don't get anything.

First of all, you have to take a calculated decision.

Second thing, this is the paradox of life.

When you stop pressurizing yourself that I have to be

successful, when you remove this pressure from yourself,

you become free and you think and do something new, good

and changing your life in that freedom.

Do you remember that?

Just tell me quickly in the comment section.

Many times you don't remember the answer after sitting for

3 hours.

You are trying to remember one word.

And the moment you step out of that room, you remember the

answer.

Why? What does it mean?

Law of Reversed Effort.

The more you tell yourself that I have to work hard, I have

to work hard, now you will not be able to work hard.

So tell yourself that I will do something in life, but if

this exam is clear, then it is a good thing.

If you get this job, it is a good thing.

If you don't get this job, there are many other jobs in the

world, but if you get this job, it will feel good.

Work with this intention and don't consider yourself so

poor.

So work on yourself.

Where will it start first?

I am not like this, I am very good.

There are some things in me that are less, we can learn

over the period of time.

So where will it start?

That you are not poor, you are not a victim, there is no

problem with you, no screw is loose, everything is fine.

This happens with everyone.

I am able to say with so much confidence that this happens

with everyone, you have no problem because I used to feel

that I have a lot of problems.

Then I started creating content.

At this time, there are nearly 3,91,000 people on YouTube.

And out of all the people who watch my video, 1,50,000

views come.

Out of that, the maximum people write relatable, relatable,

relatable.

Do you understand?

So even after seeing 50,000 people, you are able to relate

to them.

1 lakh people are able to relate.

This means you are not alone.

We just feel that we are poor, my problem is very

different, I have been born very different.

I am not able to do good to my family.

These are all things of the mind.

Don't pressurize yourself so much.

If you have any passion, then don't pressurize your passion

so much that it breaks the

Give yourself a chance to bloom.

I think like this many times that I have not been

successful in life, I have not been able to do anything.

So what if I start living in such a place where the cost is

less.

Like if I couldn't do well, now I have bought an iPhone.

If I didn't buy it, I would have bought a small phone.

I haven't bought a car yet.

So I would have traveled from metro to metro.

So if I keep my expenses so limited, even after earning, I

have not increased my expenses so much.

Because then I am moving to a new city, I will buy this and

that.

Aspirations are good, but if they are coming at the cost of

your mental peace.

Or I am coming by pressurizing myself so much.

So they will not be able to come in the first place.

And if they come, they will still give you stress.

So this is the paradox of life.

That when you tell yourself that even if it doesn't work,

it will work.

There is no tension.

Then to your surprise you realize you will study better.

You will look confident in that job because you are not

desperate.

Even if I made an attempt, but my attitude was like this in

that interview.

That this is not my last job, this is not my first job.

If they don't give me a job, I won't get a job.

I will do something in life, even if I will get less than

my colleagues.

I will get less than my friends, but I will get it.

I went to the interview with this attitude.

And to my surprise, the people who performed very well in

the article trip.

They were not able to perform in that interview because

they were pressurizing themselves.

And I don't know what confidence I took.

Because I had discovered new confidence.

I had learned to own myself.

So I performed well in the interview.

So this is the paradox of life.

You think that she has done it, so she is saying.

I only know how I did it.

If someone tells me again that you have become a CA, do CA

work.

Or how did you become, give me the paper again.

I will say no.

It is the grace of God that I have done it once.

I mean, as many times as I have done it, now I have done it.

So I told myself a lot that brother, now I will own myself.

If I have to take out life in less, then I will take it out.

This thing removed that anxiety, fear, pressure from my

head.

So I was able to perform well.

And things kept getting better.

So stop thinking of yourself as a defective piece for once.

Think of yourself as good, do good things.

Everything will be fine in life.

Be happy.

One day I will be a must.

You will be great in life.

And yes, average children sometimes do well in life.

Way better than the topper performs in real life.

Because the exam of life is giving flavors and telling.

It happens.

The one who performed there, the whole game is his.

And that just changes your life.

On that note, this is CNA Hata signing off for this video.

Do tell me how did you like the video.

Do tell me on which topic you want next.

And keep making good comments.

I definitely read and try to answer it in the next.

Okay, bye-bye.

Take care.