The Secret to Getting Anything You Want in Life given by Jennifer Cohen | Jen Cohen | TEDxBuckhead

Summary

The speaker discusses the secret to success, emphasizing boldness over intelligence. Self-doubt and fear often hold people back from achieving their goals. The speaker shares a personal story about boldly pursuing a dream job by involving Keanu Reeves, highlighting the importance of asking for what you want and taking action. The '10% target' strategy is introduced, encouraging people to make ten attempts at their goals, becoming comfortable with failure and developing resilience. Ultimately, the message is to chase what you want rather than settling for what's convenient.

Takeaways

• 😨 Fear and self-doubt are often the barriers to achieving our desires, stemming from a belief that we are not capable or deserving.
• 🧠 Boldness is more indicative of success than intelligence, as it drives action and overcomes the paralysis of negative prediction.
• 🎯 The speaker's personal story illustrates the power of boldness and persistence in pursuing a dream, even if it doesn't lead to the expected outcome.
• 📞 Taking action, such as asking for what you want, is crucial to success, as demonstrated by the story of attempting to get Keanu Reeves on a demo tape.
• 🤔 The importance of asking for what you want is emphasized, as many people fail to do so, missing opportunities for success or advancement.
• 💡 The '10% target' mindset is introduced as a strategy to become comfortable with failure and to build resilience through repeated attempts.
• 📈 Boldness is a skill that can be developed and improved with practice, contrary to the belief that it is an innate trait.
• 🍽️ An analogy is made to ordering off-menu at a restaurant to illustrate the concept of being bold and asking for what you specifically want.
• 📝 The speaker suggests an action item: write down what you want most and make ten attempts to achieve it, embracing the possibility of failure.
• 🚀 The message is that by chasing what you want and not settling for what's easily available, you increase your chances of happiness and satisfaction.
• 🏆 The speaker's own success as a best-selling author and entrepreneur is attributed to adopting the '10% target' and learning from repeated failures.

Q & A

What is the main theme of the video script?

The main theme of the video script is overcoming self-doubt and the importance of boldness in achieving one's goals in life.

Why does the speaker believe self-doubt is a significant barrier to achieving what we want?

The speaker believes self-doubt is a barrier because it stems from a story we tell ourselves that we can't achieve something, leading to fear of failure and rejection, which prevents us from taking action.

What is the speaker's view on the relationship between intelligence and success?

The speaker suggests that while intelligence is valuable, boldness is a stronger indicator of success because smart people often predict negative outcomes and hesitate to take action, whereas bold people focus on positive possibilities.

What was the speaker's big dream when she was 18 years old?

The speaker's big dream at 18 was to become a VJ for MuchMusic, which was like MTV in Canada.

How did the speaker attempt to make her dream job a reality?

The speaker attempted to make her dream job a reality by creating a demo tape and boldly approaching Keanu Reeves to be part of it, which eventually led to him participating in her tape.

What was the outcome of the speaker's bold attempt to get a job at MuchMusic?

Despite getting an audition, the speaker did not get the job at MuchMusic, but the experience taught her a valuable lesson about the importance of asking for what you want.

What is the '10% target' mindset that the speaker developed?

The '10% target' mindset is the idea of making ten attempts at whatever you want most in life, with the understanding that you may fail 90% of the time but will still achieve success or learn something valuable.

Why is the speaker advocating for making ten attempts instead of just one?

The speaker advocates for ten attempts to build resilience, comfort with failure, and to increase the likelihood of success, as most people don't even attempt once due to fear.

What is the speaker's advice on how to practice and improve boldness?

The speaker advises practicing boldness by making attempts at asking for what you want, even in small things, to build the habit and confidence to do so in larger, more significant matters.

How does the speaker define success in the context of the '10% target'?

In the context of the '10% target', success is defined as either achieving the desired outcome or gaining something unexpected that you were meant to do, through the process of making multiple attempts.

What is the speaker's personal testimony regarding the effectiveness of the '10% target'?

The speaker's personal testimony is that by failing 90% of the time and continuously chasing what she wanted, she became a best-selling author, successful entrepreneur, and co-founder of a charity, proving that the '10% target' works.