The brain in love | Helen Fisher

Summary

Le script décrit des expériences de neuro-imagerie cérébrale sur l'amour romantique, montrant que les régions cérébrales impliquées sont similaires à celles actives lors de l'usage de cocaïne, suggérant un aspect obsessionnel. L'amour est présenté comme un comportement universel et puissant, impliquant des sentiments profonds et parfois des actes extrêmes. Les chercheurs explorent également les raisons pour lesquelles on tombe amoureux de certaines personnes plutôt que d'autres, en développant un questionnaire pour comprendre les types de personnalité liés à la dopamine, la sérotonine, l'œstrogène et la testostérone.

Takeaways

• 🧠 L'amour romantique est étudié grâce à la tomographie par résonance magnétique fonctionnelle (fMRI) sur des personnes en amour, heureuses ou ayant été abandonnées.
• 🏰 L'histoire du temple de Tikal en Guatémala illustre l'idée que l'amour est une émotion ancienne et universelle, même après 1300 ans.
• 🎭 L'amour est omniprésent dans les cultures du monde entier, manifesté par la poésie, la musique, les histoires et les légendes.
• 💔 L'expérience de l'amour n'est pas toujours heureuse; près de 95% des étudiants interrogés ont été rejetés ou ont rejeté quelqu'un qu'ils adoraient.
• 🧩 L'étude révèle que l'amour romantique est associé à l'activité du système de récompense cérébral, y compris la région ventrale tegmental (VTA) et les cellules A10, qui produisent de la dopamine.
• 🔥 L'amour est décrit comme une obsession qui peut s'aggraver après un rejet, activant des régions cérébrales similaires à celles liées à l'amour intense.
• 📊 Les chercheurs ont également observé une activité cérébrale liée à la calculatrice des gains et des pertes, ainsi qu'à l'attachement profond envers l'autre personne après un rejet.
• 🐘 L'amour est non seulement humain, mais aussi animalier; les animaux dans la nature ont des préférences et des 'favoris' pour l'accouplement.
• 💊 L'amour romantique est comparé à une addiction, avec des caractéristiques telles que la tolérance, les sevre et les rechutes.
• 🧬 L'auteur a élaboré un questionnaire pour explorer comment les taux de dopamine, de sérotonine, d'œstrogène et de testostérone pourraient influencer les choix amoureux et les types de personnalité.
• 🔍 L'étude continue avec des personnes en relations à long terme, montrant que les régions cérébrales associées à l'amour romantique restent actives même après 25 ans.

Q & A

Combien de personnes ont été soumises à une analyse par IRMf fonctionnelle dans l'étude sur l'amour?

37 personnes qui étaient follement amoureuses ont été soumises à une analyse par IRMf fonctionnelle.

Quel est le lien entre l'amour romantique et la production de dopamine dans le cerveau?

L'amour romantique est associé à l'activité de la région du ventral tegmental area (VTA) et des cellules A10, qui produisent de la dopamine, un stimulant naturel, et l'envoient dans de nombreuses régions cérébrales.

Quelle est la différence entre l'amour romantique et l'effet de la cocaïne sur le cerveau?

Bien que l'amour romantique active la même région cérébrale que la cocaïne, l'amour est une obsession qui persiste au-delà du haut-le-cœur de la cocaïne.

Quels sont les trois régions cérébrales actives chez les personnes qui ont été abandonnées récemment dans l'étude?

Les trois régions cérébrales actives sont la région associée à l'amour romantique intense, la région associée au calcul des gains et des pertes, et la région associée à l'attachement profond envers un autre individu.

Pourquoi les personnes rejetées par leur partenaire continuent-elles de les aimer plus intensément?

Le système de récompense du cerveau, associé au désir, à la motivation, à la concentration et au manque, devient plus actif lorsqu'on ne peut pas obtenir ce que l'on veut, comme un partenaire approprié.

Quel est le lien entre l'amour romantique et l'addiction selon les conclusions de l'étude?

L'amour romantique est considéré comme une addiction, avec des caractéristiques telles que la focalisation sur la personne, la pensée obsessionnelle, le désir, la distortion de la réalité et la prise de risques importants pour gagner la personne.

Quelle est l'origine possible de l'expression 'love at first sight' selon les chercheurs?

L'origine possible de 'love at first sight' est liée à l'attraction instantanée observée chez les animaux, qui pourrait être due à la même région cérébrale ou aux mêmes substances chimiques du système de récompense.

Quel est le rôle de l'enfance dans les choix amoureux des adultes selon l'script?

L'enfance a un rôle dans les choix amoureux des adultes, bien que les chercheurs ne sachent pas encore comment elle influence exactement ces choix.

Quel est le but de la nouvelle expérience qui a été lancée par le chercheur et son collègue Art Aron?

Le but de la nouvelle expérience est d'étudier les personnes qui déclarent être toujours amoureuses après 10 à 25 ans de mariage, en utilisant l'IRMf fonctionnelle.

Quel est le lien entre les quatre types de personnalités évoluées et les taux de dopamine, de sérotonine, d'œstrogène et de testostérone dans le cerveau?

Le chercheur a élaboré un questionnaire pour déterminer dans quelle mesure les personnes expriment ces quatre substances chimiques, qui sont associées à quatre types de personnalités très larges et évolutives.

Pourquoi les chercheurs ont-ils créé le site de rencontre Chemistry.com?

Le site Chemistry.com a été créé pour comprendre les raisons pour lesquelles les gens tombent amoureux d'une personne plutôt qu'une autre, en se basant sur les taux d'expression de dopamine, sérotonine, œstrogène et testostérone.

Outlines

00:00

🧠 L'amour et la neurobiologie

Le premier paragraphe décrit une étude sur l'amour où 37 personnes en amour furent soumises à une imagerie cérébrale par résonance magnétique. L'étude a examiné différentes catégories d'individus, y compris ceux en amour heureux et ceux qui ont été abandonnés. Le narrateur fait un parallèle entre l'amour humain et l'histoire de Jasaw Chan K'awiil, un roi maya enterré sous un temple en l'honneur de son épouse, symbolisant l'amour éternel. Il souligne l'universalité de l'amour dans les sociétés et son impact puissant sur les individus, y compris les expériences douloureuses de rejet et d'abandon. Le paragraphe se termine par une citation de poésie sur l'amour, soulignant la profondeur des sentiments qu'il peut susciter.

05:01

💔 L'obsession de l'amour romantique

Le deuxième paragraphe explore comment l'amour romantique est une obsession qui peut s'intensifier après un rejet. Les chercheurs ont examiné les images cérébrales de personnes qui venaient de se faire abandonner et ont trouvé des activités similaires à celles des personnes en amour intense. L'amour est décrit comme un comportement addictif avec des caractéristiques telles que la tolérance, les symptômes de sévrage et les relapses. Le narrateur partage son opinion que l'amour romantique est une forme d'addiction, et appelle à la prise de conscience de cette réalité par la communauté médicale, juridique et universitaire.

10:02

🐘 L'amour chez les animaux et la première vue

Dans le troisième paragraphe, l'auteur discute de l'amour et de la sélectivité sexuelle chez les animaux, suggérant qu'ils ont aussi des préférences et qu'ils peuvent être attirés instantanément, ce qui pourrait être à l'origine de l'expression 'love at first sight'. Il mentionne des études sur l'attirance et le système de récompense cérébral impliqué dans ces sentiments. L'auteur exprime sa propre expérience et sa compréhension de l'amour, qui n'a pas été altérée par ses connaissances scientifiques, et mentionne un nouveau type de recherche sur les couples en amour après de longues années de relation.

15:03

👥 Différences de genre dans l'intimité et l'amour

Le dernier paragraphe aborde les différences de genre dans l'expression et la perception de l'intimité et de l'amour. Il décrit comment les femmes et les hommes peuvent chercher et éprouver de l'intimité de manières différentes, liées à des comportements évolutifs et sociaux. L'auteur conclut en disant que l'amour est profondément ancré dans notre cerveau et que le défi est de mieux comprendre les uns les autres, soulignant l'importance de la compréhension mutuelle dans les relations humaines.

Keywords

💡Amour romantique

L'amour romantique est une émotion intense et passionnée qui implique un attachement profond à une autre personne. Dans le script, il est décrit comme l'une des expériences les plus puissantes sur Terre, impliquant des sentiments d'obsession et de désir intenses, et est étudié par les scientifiques à travers des expériences de scanner cérébral.

💡Scanner IRM fonctionnel

Le scanner IRM fonctionnel est un appareil médical utilisé pour observer l'activité cérébrale en temps réel. Dans le script, il est mentionné comme outil pour étudier l'amour romantique en enregistrant l'activité cérébrale des personnes enceintes de sentiments amoureux.

💡Ventral tegmental area (VTA)

La région du ventral tegmental est une petite zone cérébrale qui est active lors de l'amour romantique et est associée au système de récompense. Elle est mentionnée dans le script comme la région où se produit de la dopamine, un stimulateur naturel.

💡Dopamine

La dopamine est une neurotransmetteur associée à la récompense, le plaisir et la motivation. Dans le script, elle est liée à l'expérience de l'amour romantique et à l'activation de la région VTA.

💡Obsession

L'obsession est un état de pensée répétitive et inarrêtable centré sur une personne ou une idée. Le script décrit l'amour romantique comme une obsession qui empêche la personne de s'empêcher de penser à l'objet de son amour.

💡Rejet

Le rejet est l'acte de refuser ou de ne pas retourner les sentiments d'une autre personne. Dans le script, l'expérience du rejet est explorée en termes de son impact sur l'activité cérébrale et les sentiments d'amour persistants.

💡Equinoxe

L'équinoxe est un moment de l'année où le jour et la nuit ont une durée égale. Le script raconte une histoire maya où l'ombre d'un temple se projette sur l'autre à l'équinoxe, symbolisant l'amour éternel entre deux êtres aimants.

💡Addiction

L'addiction est un état de dépendance à une substance ou une activité. Le script utilise le terme pour décrire l'amour romantique, mettant en évidence les caractéristiques telles que la tolérance, les séquelles et les rechutes.

💡Sexualité

La sexualité fait référ à l'ensemble des attributs liés à l'identité, aux comportements et aux orientations sexuelles d'une personne. Le script mentionne la sexualité comme un aspect de l'amour romantique et de la recherche de partenaires appropriés.

💡Sélection naturelle

La sélection naturelle est un concept en évolution qui explique comment les caractéristiques heritables peuvent être favorisées dans la population. Le script suggère que les préférences en matière d'amour pourraient être influencées par des facteurs biologiques liés à la sélection naturelle.

💡Types de personnalité

Les types de personnalité se réfèrent aux différents modèles de comportement et de pensée qui peuvent être associés à des ratios spécifiques de neurotransmetteurs cérébraux. Dans le script, l'auteur parle d'un questionnaire conçu pour déterminer les types de personnalité en se basant sur l'expression de dopamine, de sérotonine, d'estrogène et de testostérone.

Highlights

37 people in love were studied using a functional MRI brain scanner to understand the brain's response to love.

17 individuals happily in love and 15 who had just been dumped were part of the brain scanning experiment.

A third experiment is underway studying love after 10 to 25 years of marriage.

The story of the Mayan Sun King Jasaw Chan K'awiil and his wife's temple illustrates love's historical significance.

Evidence of romantic love has been found in 170 societies, indicating its universal presence.

Almost 95 percent of college students have experienced both rejection and being the one to end a relationship.

A powerful love poem from a Kwakiutl Indian conveys the intense emotions of love.

Romantic love is described as one of the most powerful sensations on Earth.

Activity in the ventral tegmental area (VTA) and A10 cells, related to dopamine production, is linked to romantic love.

Romantic love is an obsession that can intensify after rejection, as brain scans of those recently dumped show.

Brain activity in regions associated with gains and losses, deep attachment, and reward systems is observed in rejected lovers.

Romantic love is posited as a basic mating drive, focusing energy on a single partner.

Love is compared to an addiction with characteristics like tolerance, withdrawal, and relapse.

Animals also exhibit selective mating behaviors, suggesting a biological basis for attraction.

The speaker's personal understanding of love has deepened without diminishing its magic.

A new experiment confirms that long-term couples still show brain activity associated with romantic love.

A questionnaire and dating site, Chemistry.com, are being used to explore the biological basis of attraction between individuals.

The speaker is investigating why individuals fall in love with some people and not others, considering biological factors.

Different ways men and women achieve intimacy, possibly rooted in evolutionary behaviors, are highlighted.

Love is deeply embedded in our brains, and understanding it is an ongoing challenge.

Transcripts

I and my colleagues Art Aron and Lucy Brown and others,

have put 37 people who are madly in love into a functional MRI brain scanner.

17 who were happily in love, 15 who had just been dumped,

and we're just starting our third experiment:

studying people who report that they're still in love

after 10 to 25 years of marriage.

So, this is the short story of that research.

In the jungles of Guatemala, in Tikal, stands a temple.

It was built by the grandest Sun King, of the grandest city-state,

of the grandest civilization of the Americas, the Mayas.

His name was Jasaw Chan K'awiil.

He stood over six feet tall.

He lived into his 80s,

and he was buried beneath this monument in 720 AD.

And Mayan inscriptions proclaim that he was deeply in love with his wife.

So, he built a temple in her honor, facing his.

And every spring and autumn, exactly at the equinox,

the sun rises behind his temple,

and perfectly bathes her temple with his shadow.

And as the sun sets behind her temple in the afternoon,

it perfectly bathes his temple with her shadow.

After 1,300 years, these two lovers still touch and kiss from their tomb.

Around the world, people love.

They sing for love, they dance for love,

they compose poems and stories about love.

They tell myths and legends about love.

They pine for love, they live for love, they kill for love, and they die for love.

As Walt Whitman once said, "O I would stake all for you."

Anthropologists have found evidence of romantic love in 170 societies.

They've never found a society that did not have it.

But love isn't always a happy experience.

In one study of college students, they asked a lot of questions about love,

but the two that stood out to me the most were:

"Have you ever been rejected by somebody who you really loved?"

And the second question was:

"Have you ever dumped somebody who really loved you?"

And almost 95 percent of both men and women said yes to both.

Almost nobody gets out of love alive.

So, before I start telling you about the brain,

I want to read for you

what I think is the most powerful love poem on Earth.

There's other love poems that are, of course, just as good,

but I don't think this one can be surpassed.

It was told by an anonymous Kwakiutl Indian of southern Alaska

to a missionary in 1896.

And here it is.

I've never had the opportunity to say it before.

"Fire runs through my body with the pain of loving you.

Pain runs through my body with the fires of my love for you.

Pain like a boil about to burst with my love for you,

consumed by fire with my love for you.

I remember what you said to me.

I am thinking of your love for me.

I am torn by your love for me.

Pain and more pain --

where are you going with my love?

I am told you will go from here.

I am told you will leave me here.

My body is numb with grief.

Remember what I said, my love.

Goodbye, my love, goodbye."

Emily Dickinson once wrote, "Parting is all we need to know of hell."

How many people have suffered

in all the millions of years of human evolution?

How many people around the world

are dancing with elation at this very minute?

Romantic love is one of the most powerful sensations on Earth.

So, several years ago, I decided to look into the brain

and study this madness.

Our first study of people who were happily in love

has been widely publicized,

so I'm only going to say very little about it.

We found activity in a tiny, little factory near the base of the brain

called the ventral tegmental area.

We found activity in some cells called the A10 cells,

cells that actually make dopamine, a natural stimulant,

and spray it to many brain regions.

Indeed, this part, the VTA, is part of the brain's reward system.

It's way below your cognitive thinking process.

It's below your emotions.

It's part of what we call the reptilian core of the brain,

associated with wanting, with motivation, with focus and with craving.

In fact, the same brain region where we found activity

becomes active also when you feel the rush of cocaine.

But romantic love is much more than a cocaine high --

at least you come down from cocaine.

Romantic love is an obsession, it possesses you.

You lose your sense of self.

You can't stop thinking about another human being.

Somebody is camping in your head.

As an eighth-century Japanese poet said, "My longing had no time when it ceases."

Wild is love.

And the obsession can get worse when you've been rejected.

So, right now, Lucy Brown and I, the neuroscientists on our project,

are looking at the data of the people

who were put into the machine after they had just been dumped.

It was very difficult actually, putting these people in the machine,

because they were in such bad shape.

(Laughter)

So anyway, we found activity in three brain regions.

We found activity in the brain region,

in exactly the same brain region associated with intense romantic love.

What a bad deal.

You know, when you've been dumped,

the one thing you love to do is just forget about this human being,

and then go on with your life -- but no, you just love them harder.

As the poet Terence, the Roman poet once said,

he said, "The less my hope, the hotter my love."

And indeed, we now know why.

Two thousand years later, we can explain this in the brain.

That brain system -- the reward system

for wanting, for motivation, for craving, for focus --

becomes more active when you can't get what you want.

In this case, life's greatest prize: an appropriate mating partner.

We found activity in other brain regions also --

in a brain region associated with calculating gains and losses.

You're lying there, you're looking at the picture,

and you're in this machine,

and you're calculating what went wrong.

What have I lost?

As a matter of fact, Lucy and I have a little joke about this.

It comes from a David Mamet play,

and there's two con artists in the play,

and the woman is conning the man,

and the man looks at the woman and says,

"Oh, you're a bad pony, I'm not going to bet on you."

And indeed, it's this part of the brain,

the core of the nucleus accumbens,

that is becoming active as you're measuring your gains and losses.

It's also the brain region that becomes active

when you're willing to take enormous risks for huge gains and huge losses.

Last but not least, we found activity in a brain region

associated with deep attachment to another individual.

No wonder people suffer around the world, and we have so many crimes of passion.

When you've been rejected in love,

not only are you engulfed with feelings of romantic love,

but you're feeling deep attachment to this individual.

Moreover, this brain circuit for reward is working,

and you're feeling intense energy, intense focus, intense motivation

and the willingness to risk it all, to win life's greatest prize.

So, what have I learned from this experiment

that I would like to tell the world?

Foremost, I have come to think

that romantic love is a drive, a basic mating drive.

Not the sex drive --

the sex drive gets you looking for a whole range of partners.

Romantic love enables you to focus your mating energy

on just one at a time, conserve your mating energy,

and start the mating process with this single individual.

I think of all the poetry that I've read about romantic love,

what sums it up best is something that is said by Plato

over 2,000 years ago.

He said, "The god of love lives in a state of need.

It is a need, it is an urge, it is a homeostatic imbalance.

Like hunger and thirst, it's almost impossible to stamp out."

I've also come to believe that romantic love is an addiction:

a perfectly wonderful addiction when it's going well,

and a perfectly horrible addiction when it's going poorly.

And indeed, it has all of the characteristics of addiction.

You focus on the person, you obsessively think about them,

you crave them, you distort reality,

your willingness to take enormous risks to win this person.

And it's got the three main characteristics of addiction:

tolerance, you need to see them more, and more, and more;

withdrawals;

and last: relapse.

I've got a girlfriend who's just getting over a terrible love affair.

It's been about eight months, she's beginning to feel better.

And she was driving along in her car the other day,

and suddenly she heard a song on the car radio

that reminded her of this man.

Not only did the instant craving come back,

but she had to pull over from the side of the road and cry.

So, one thing I would like the medical community,

and the legal community, and even the college community,

to see if they can understand, that indeed, romantic love

is one of the most addictive substances on Earth.

I would also like to tell the world that animals love.

There's not an animal on this planet

that will copulate with anything that comes along.

Too old, too young, too scruffy, too stupid, and they won't do it.

Unless you're stuck in a laboratory cage --

and you know, if you spend your entire life in a little box,

you're not going to be as picky about who you have sex with,

but I've looked in a hundred species,

and everywhere in the wild, animals have favorites.

As a matter of fact, ethologists know this.

There are over eight words for what they call "animal favoritism:"

selective proceptivity, mate choice, female choice, sexual choice.

And indeed, there are now three academic articles

in which they've looked at this attraction,

which may only last for a second,

but it's a definite attraction,

and either this same brain region, this reward system,

or the chemicals of that reward system are involved.

In fact, I think animal attraction can be instant --

you can see an elephant instantly go for another elephant.

And I think that this is really the origin

of what you and I call "love at first sight."

People have often asked me

whether what I know about love has spoiled it for me.

And I just simply say, "Hardly."

You can know every single ingredient in a piece of chocolate cake,

and then when you sit down and eat that cake,

you can still feel that joy.

And certainly, I make all the same mistakes that everybody else does too,

but it's really deepened my understanding

and compassion, really, for all human life.

As a matter of fact, in New York, I often catch myself

looking in baby carriages and feeling a little sorry for the tot.

And in fact, sometimes I feel a little sorry

for the chicken on my dinner plate,

when I think of how intense this brain system is.

Our newest experiment has been hatched

by my colleague, Art Aron --

putting people who are reporting that they are still in love,

in a long-term relationship, into the functional MRI.

We've put five people in so far,

and indeed, we found exactly the same thing.

They're not lying.

The brain areas associated with intense romantic love

still become active, 25 years later.

There are still many questions to be answered

and asked about romantic love.

The question that I'm working on right this minute --

and I'm only going to say it for a second, and then end --

is, why do you fall in love with one person, rather than another?

I never would have even thought to think of this,

but Match.com, the Internet dating site,

came to me three years ago and asked me that question.

And I said, I don't know.

I know what happens in the brain, when you do become in love,

but I don't know why you fall in love with one person rather than another.

And so, I've spent the last three years on this.

And there are many reasons that you fall in love with one person

rather than another, that psychologists can tell you.

And we tend to fall in love with somebody from the same socioeconomic background,

the same general level of intelligence, of good looks, the same religious values.

Your childhood certainly plays a role, but nobody knows how.

And that's about it, that's all they know.

No, they've never found

the way two personalities fit together to make a good relationship.

So, it began to occur to me

that maybe your biology pulls you towards some people rather than another.

And I have concocted a questionnaire to see to what degree

you express dopamine, serotonin, estrogen and testosterone.

I think we've evolved four very broad personality types

associated with the ratios of these four chemicals in the brain.

And on this dating site that I have created, called Chemistry.com,

I ask you first a series of questions

to see to what degree you express these chemicals,

and I'm watching who chooses who to love.

And 3.7 million people have taken the questionnaire in America.

About 600,000 people have taken it in 33 other countries.

I'm putting the data together now,

and at some point -- there will always be magic to love,

but I think I will come closer to understanding

why it is you can walk into a room and everybody is from your background,

your same general level of intelligence, good looks,

and you don't feel pulled towards all of them.

I think there's biology to that.

I think we're going to end up, in the next few years,

to understand all kinds of brain mechanisms

that pull us to one person rather than another.

So, I will close with this.

These are my older people.

Faulkner said, "The past is not dead, it's not even past."

Indeed, we carry a lot of luggage from our yesteryear in the human brain.

And so, there's one thing that makes me pursue my understanding of human nature,

and this reminds me of it.

These are two women.

Women tend to get intimacy differently than men do.

Women get intimacy from face-to-face talking.

We swivel towards each other,

we do what we call the "anchoring gaze" and we talk.

This is intimacy to women.

I think it comes from millions of years

of holding that baby in front of your face,

cajoling it, reprimanding it, educating it with words.

Men tend to get intimacy from side-by-side doing.

As soon as one guy looks up, the other guy will look away.

(Laughter)

I think it comes from millions of years sitting behind the bush,

looking straight ahead, trying to hit that buffalo on the head with a rock.

I think, for millions of years, men faced their enemies,

they sat side-by-side with friends.

So my final statement is: love is in us.

It's deeply embedded in the brain.

Our challenge is to understand each other.

Thank you.

(Applause)