Why A Relapse Becomes A Binge w/ Dr. Trish Leigh

Summary

Dr. Trish Leigh, a brain health and sex addiction recovery coach, explains the science behind why a relapse into watching porn can escalate into a binge. She describes the '4D Dopamine Cycle'—drip, deluge, drowning, and deficit—which illustrates the brain's dependency on high dopamine levels from porn, leading to cravings and urges. To combat this, Dr. Leigh suggests strategies like maintaining streaks, finding accountability, and engaging in exciting life activities to rewire the brain away from the addictive stimulus.

Takeaways

• 🧠 The brain craves high levels of dopamine from porn, which it has become accustomed to, leading to urges and cravings when trying to abstain.
• 🎯 Pornography is described as a 'super normal stimulus' that floods the brain with dopamine, creating a strong desire for its consumption.
• ⏱️ There's a critical '3-second window' to resist the initial dopamine trigger when the thought of watching porn arises, which can prevent a full relapse.
• 🌊 The 'dopamine deluge' refers to the overwhelming surge of dopamine that follows the decision to watch porn, intensifying the pleasure but also the addiction cycle.
• 🏊‍♂️ The 'dopamine drowning' stage signifies the brain's complete saturation with dopamine, setting the stage for a potential binge.
• 💧 The 'dopamine deficit' is the state of low dopamine levels after the binge, which can drive the individual to seek more stimulation to compensate.
• 🔁 The '4D dopamine cycle' (drip, deluge, drowning, deficit) is a cycle of addiction that can lead to a binge if not interrupted early.
• 🔄 The 'chaser effect' is the brain's increased desire for more dopamine after experiencing a high from porn, making it difficult to stop at just one session.
• 🚫 The script emphasizes the importance of avoiding the initial 'drip' of dopamine to prevent a full relapse and subsequent binge.
• 🤝 Accountability and support are crucial in maintaining streaks of abstinence from porn, suggesting the use of an accountability partner or group.
• 🎉 Celebrating small victories, like day-by-day or week-by-week streaks, can help reinforce the positive behavior of staying away from porn.
• 🎭 Engaging in exciting and fulfilling activities that naturally stimulate dopamine production can help rewire the brain away from porn addiction.

Q & A

What is the primary reason for cravings and urges when trying to abstain from watching porn according to Dr. Trish Leigh?

Dr. Trish Leigh explains that cravings and urges occur due to the brain's desire for high levels of dopamine, which it is accustomed to receiving from the supernormal stimulus of porn.

What is the term used to describe the effect of pornography on the brain in terms of dopamine release?

The term used is 'cardboard butterfly effect,' which signifies that pornography is a supernormal stimulus that floods the brain with dopamine.

What is the 4D dopamine cycle mentioned by Dr. Trish Leigh, and what does it consist of?

The 4D dopamine cycle consists of: 1) Dopamine Drip - the initial idea of watching porn triggers a small dopamine release, 2) Dopamine Deluge - a flood of dopamine when actually watching porn, 3) Dopamine Drowning - the brain becomes completely flooded with dopamine, and 4) Dopamine Deficit - a state of wanting to return to high dopamine levels after the binge.

Why does the brain want to go through the 4D cycle again after experiencing a dopamine deficit?

The brain inherently wants to go through the cycle again due to the dopamine deficit state, as it has become dependent on high levels of dopamine and seeks to return to that state.

What is the 'chaser effect' in the context of a relapse into watching porn?

The 'chaser effect' refers to the brain's desire for more and more dopamine after experiencing a high level of dopamine from a relapse, leading to a binge.

How does Dr. Trish Leigh describe the process of rewiring the brain to avoid cravings and urges?

Dr. Trish Leigh suggests that during the unwire process, one should actively rewire the brain to no longer have cravings and urges by engaging in activities that provide dopamine from real life, not from the screen.

What is the recommended strategy to avoid a relapse from becoming a binge according to the script?

The strategy includes staying on the streak by counting days or weeks, celebrating progress, getting an accountability partner, joining a supportive group, and running away from the initial dopamine drip to engage in other dopamine-boosting activities.

What role does dopamine play in the development of a dependency on porn, as explained by Dr. Trish Leigh?

Dopamine plays a crucial role in developing a dependency on porn by consistently flooding the brain with high levels of dopamine, leading to a need for these high levels to feel good or satisfied.

How does Dr. Trish Leigh define the difference between a normal stimulus and a supernormal stimulus in terms of dopamine release?

A normal stimulus, even one that is high like skydiving or boxing, releases dopamine but is still considered healthy. In contrast, a supernormal stimulus like pornography releases an excessive amount of dopamine, leading to a dependency.

What advice does Dr. Trish Leigh give to someone experiencing an urge to watch porn?

Dr. Trish Leigh advises to run in the opposite direction of the urge, trick the brain with an activity that naturally boosts dopamine, and seek support from an accountability partner or group to help resist the urge.

How does Dr. Trish Leigh emphasize the importance of staying on the streak of not watching porn?

She emphasizes the importance by highlighting the potential regret one might feel after a binge and the difficulty of breaking the 4D cycle once it has started, urging individuals to stay committed to their streak.

Outlines

00:00

🧠 Understanding the Relapse to Binge Cycle

Dr. Trish Leigh, a brain health and sex addiction recovery coach, explains why a slip into watching porn can escalate into a binge. She discusses the role of dopamine in creating cravings and urges, as the brain seeks the high levels of this neurotransmitter it's accustomed to receiving from pornography. Dr. Leigh describes the '4D Dopamine Cycle' which includes the initial dopamine drip, the deluge, the drowning, and the deficit, which can lead to a cycle of addiction. She emphasizes the importance of rewiring the brain to resist these urges and suggests strategies such as staying on a streak, celebrating progress, and seeking support to prevent relapse from becoming a binge.

05:01

🏃‍♂️ Outrunning the Dopamine Drip to Avoid Binge

In this paragraph, Dr. Trish Leigh advises on how to handle the initial dopamine drip that can lead to a binge if not managed properly. She encourages individuals to run away from the temptation, using a 'brain hack' to redirect their focus to activities that naturally stimulate dopamine production in a healthy way. The summary highlights the importance of tricking the brain into associating pleasure with real-life experiences rather than with the artificial high from pornography. Dr. Leigh also stresses the value of maintaining streaks and finding excitement in life's activities to rewire the brain away from pornographic stimuli, and ends with a motivational note to stay in control of one's brain.

Keywords

💡Relapse

Relapse refers to a return to a previous behavior, especially after a period of improvement or abstinence. In the context of the video, it is the act of returning to watching porn after a period of not doing so. The script explains that a relapse can quickly escalate into a binge due to the brain's craving for high levels of dopamine, which it associates with the pleasurable experience of watching porn.

💡Binge

A binge is an intense and uncontrolled period of indulgence in a particular activity, often to the point of excess. The video script uses the term 'binge' to describe a situation where a single relapse into watching porn leads to a prolonged and excessive session, driven by the brain's desire for the high levels of dopamine it receives from the activity.

💡Dopamine

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter associated with the brain's reward system and the experience of pleasure. The script explains that watching porn floods the brain with dopamine, creating a strong association between the activity and pleasure. This leads to cravings and urges when trying to abstain, and a powerful draw back into the behavior during a relapse.

💡Cravings and Urges

Cravings and urges are intense desires for something, often associated with addiction. In the script, these terms are used to describe the feelings that arise when the brain seeks the high levels of dopamine it has become accustomed to receiving from watching porn. These cravings and urges can be a significant challenge in maintaining abstinence.

💡Rewiring the Brain

Rewiring the brain refers to the process of changing the way the brain responds to certain stimuli or behaviors. The video script suggests that abstaining from porn is not just about stopping the behavior but actively rewiring the brain to reduce cravings and urges, thus breaking the cycle of addiction.

💡4D Dopamine Cycle

The 4D Dopamine Cycle is a concept introduced in the script to describe the stages of dopamine release during a relapse into porn watching: Drip, Deluge, Drowning, and Deficit. It illustrates the escalating levels of dopamine that can lead to a binge and the subsequent difficulty in returning to a state of normal dopamine levels.

💡Dopamine Drip

The Dopamine Drip is the initial release of dopamine in the brain when the idea of watching porn is considered. The script explains that this small surge of dopamine can quickly lead to a full deluge if not resisted, as it reminds the individual of the pleasure associated with the activity.

💡Dopamine Deluge

The Dopamine Deluge is the next stage in the 4D Dopamine Cycle, where the brain is flooded with dopamine after giving in to the urge to watch porn. The script describes this as a powerful and overwhelming experience that can lead to a prolonged binge.

💡Dopamine Drowning

Dopamine Drowning is the stage in the 4D Dopamine Cycle where the brain is completely saturated with dopamine. The script uses this term to illustrate the point at which the individual has indulged to such an extent that their brain is overwhelmed by the neurotransmitter.

💡Dopamine Deficit

The Dopamine Deficit is the final stage of the 4D Dopamine Cycle, where the brain experiences a lack of dopamine after a binge, leading to a desire to re-engage in the behavior to restore the high levels of dopamine. The script explains that this deficit can create a strong motivation to repeat the cycle.

💡Chaser Effect

The Chaser Effect is a term used in the script to describe the phenomenon where, after experiencing a high level of dopamine, the brain seeks to replicate that experience repeatedly. It is a driving force behind the escalation from a relapse into a binge, as the brain craves more of the pleasurable stimulus.

💡Brain Hack

A Brain Hack, as mentioned in the script, is a strategy to manipulate the brain's responses to achieve a desired outcome. In this context, the brain hack involves distracting the brain with an alternative source of pleasure when cravings for porn arise, to prevent the onset of the 4D Dopamine Cycle and a potential binge.

💡Supernormal Stimulus

A Supernormal Stimulus is a stimulus that is more effective at triggering a response than the natural stimulus it exaggerates. The script uses this term to describe porn as an exaggerated stimulus that provides a more intense release of dopamine than normal, healthy activities, making it highly addictive.

💡Accountability Partner

An Accountability Partner is someone who helps an individual stay committed to a goal by providing support, encouragement, and sometimes monitoring progress. In the script, the concept is introduced as a strategy to help resist the urges and cravings associated with trying to abstain from porn.

Highlights

Relapse into binge behavior explained by Dr. Trish Leigh, a brain health and sex addiction recovery coach.

Cravings and urges are a result of the brain's desire for high levels of dopamine from pornography.

Pornography is described as a 'super normal stimulus' that floods the brain with dopamine.

The unwire process is necessary to rewire the brain and eliminate cravings and urges.

Giving in to an urge triggers a 'dopamine drip' in the brain, reminding of past pleasure.

The 4D dopamine cycle: Drip, Deluge, Drowning, and Deficit.

Dopamine deluge is a flood of dopamine that makes one feel good but is unhealthy.

Developing a dopamine dependency from consistent and frequent porn watching.

The chaser effect: the brain's desire for more dopamine after experiencing a high.

Addiction tricks the brain into seeking more pleasure after a relapse.

The importance of not giving in to the initial dopamine drip to prevent a binge.

Strategies to maintain a streak include daily or weekly celebrations and accountability.

The need for support during cravings, such as talking to an accountability partner.

The regret that follows a binge and the motivation to avoid it.

Brain hack strategy: running away from the dopamine drip and engaging in life-affirming activities.

The challenge of rewiring the brain to enjoy life's natural stimuli instead of the supernormal stimulus of porn.

Encouragement to stay on the streak and the final message of self-control over the brain.

Transcripts

Why a relapse becomes a binge.

If you're on a streak from watching porn,

if you're staying away and you're doing really

well, but out of the blue you have

a slip or a relapse and it becomes

a binge, I want you to know why.

I answer this question from my clients all

the time.

I'm Dr. Trish Leigh, brain health and sex

addiction recovery coach.

I'm here to help you on your porn

free brain forever journey.

So if you're trying to stay away from

porn, what will happen is you will have

cravings and urges to satisfy those cravings due

to your brain wanting high levels of dopamine,

like it's used to getting from the super

normal stimulus of porn.

We know that pornography is what they call

the cardboard butterfly effect.

It is a super normal stimulus that floods

your brain with dopamine, giving you that surge

and making you feel good.

Now, if you're trying to stay away from

that, your brain will want it.

So that's what will give you the cravings

and the urges.

Now, if you don't give in and you're

not necessarily rewiring your brain, you're likely in

the unwire process, which is great, except for

you need to rewire your brain so that

you won't have cravings and urges anymore.

So let's say you give into an urge.

What happens in that moment is the moment

you have the idea that you're going to

watch porn, you get a dopamine drip in

your brain.

You'll get that dopamine flowing and it's going

to remind you how good it used to

feel.

It's not going to remind you that it's

damaging your brain and that it's likely wreaking

havoc in your life, but it's going to

remind you how good it feels.

You have three seconds to pivot away from

that dopamine drip, or it becomes the next

D in the 4D dopamine cycle, the dopamine

deluge.

That's a flood of dopamine into your body,

into your brain, into your system.

You will get this flood of dopamine and

it's going to make you feel good.

Now, that dopamine is much higher levels than

healthy levels from real life activities.

Plus your brain, if you've watched porn consistently,

frequently, and especially with any level of intensity,

meaning genres or acts or edging, what we

know is that your brain has likely developed

a dopamine dependency.

So you're dependent upon high levels of dopamine.

So you've been staying away from them and

you're probably been feeling better.

But the minute you got the drip, it's

going to want the deluge.

Once you get the deluge, it's going to

want the third D in the cycle, the

dopamine drowning.

When you drown your brain out in dopamine,

now it's completely flooded.

And then this is what happens.

The fourth D is the dopamine deficit.

That's what happens when you go back to

your life and there's not high levels of

dopamine there.

So in this 4D cycle, your brain inherently

is going to want to start going back

through the cycle again, because now you're in

a dopamine deficit state.

So if you've stayed away from the cycle

for a really long time, once you hit

the drowning, the chaser effect will kick in.

And the chaser effect is essentially once you've

given your brain high levels of dopamine, it's

going to want more and more and more

and more.

It's going to want as much as it

can possibly get out of this relapse.

Addiction is a tricky thing.

It's slick.

It's going to make you think everything is

a brilliant idea, but instead everything's a bad

idea.

So you will feel another urge to go

back for more.

Now we call dopamine the molecule of more

motivation and pleasure.

It's going to motivate you very quickly back

for more pleasure from where you got it.

And as far as addiction goes, it's because

your brain's telling you, you said you weren't

going to do it and you're doing it.

So let's get the most out of it

that we can.

So, so many times what happens is you'll

just keep going until you hit an exhaustion

point.

Your brain has been so flooded.

The dopamine receptors in your brain have been

so desensitized that you don't even want any

more dopamine.

You're satiated, which dopamine is not easy to

be satiated.

It takes a lot.

That is why a relapse becomes a binge.

Now, what can you do about it?

Once you get the dopamine dripping and flooding,

it can be very difficult to come out

of the 4D cycle.

That's what I want you to know.

So your brain hack strategy today is if

you're on a streak, do whatever you need

to, to stay on that streak.

Count it day by day.

If that works for you, celebrate it week

by week.

If that's what works for you, get an

accountability partner, join a group that can support

you that you can call someone when you

have that craver urging, and you can talk

with that support person until it passes.

It will pass.

This too shall pass.

And once it passes and you're still on

your streak, you're going to be so psyched

because if you give into the drip, you

will likely move all the way through the

4D cycle, except for this time, it might

have the chaser effect, which means you'll be

on a binge.

And when you wake up from that binge,

you will have regret.

I don't want you to wake up with

that regret, especially if you're doing an awesome

job right now.

So if you feel that drip, you run.

You don't walk.

You run in the opposite direction and you

trick your brain.

It's a brain hack.

You're going to trick your brain in this

one.

You go do something that you love, that's

exciting, that gives your brain dopamine from your

life.

You trick your brain into thinking that that

drip is from your life, not from the

screen.

And you will rewire your brain back into

your life, into your hobbies, into your work,

into your relationships, and make sure it's exciting

because dopamine swapping like this isn't the easiest

thing to do.

Because remember, porn is a supernormal stimulus.

Anything that you get from your life, even

if it's a high stimulus like skydiving, it's

still a quote unquote normal or healthy stimulus.

That's a really high one.

If it's boxing, like I like to do,

that's going to be up there, but it's

not going to be the supernormal stimulus of

porn.

Run. Don't walk.

So you can stay on that streak.

High five yourself when you get done.

I know you can do this.

I know you want it.

Stay away from the relapse so it doesn't

become a binge.

All right.

Keep rocking it out until next time.

Control your brain or it'll control you.