Walking Through the World Non-Binary | Jesse Lueck | TEDxRanneySchool

Summary

The speaker shares their personal journey with gender identity, exploring the complexities of biological sex, gender identity, expression, and sexual orientation. They recount childhood experiences and societal pressures that led to a period of depression and a suicide attempt in high school. Finding acceptance and self-expression in college, they commit to living authentically, emphasizing the importance of being true to oneself for personal success and happiness.

Takeaways

• 🧬 The script discusses the complexity of gender, emphasizing that it is not solely about biological sex but includes a spectrum of identities and expressions.
• 👶 The speaker's childhood experiences highlight their early inclination towards non-traditional gender expressions, such as an obsession with rainbows and a preference for dresses.
• 🏳️‍🌈 The speaker identifies as non-binary, a gender identity that doesn't align with the traditional binary concepts of male or female.
• 👧👦 The speaker's experiences in school were challenging, with both peers and adults often questioning or judging their gender expression.
• 💇 The speaker's struggle with societal expectations and personal identity is exemplified by their changing hair length and style throughout their life.
• 🏌️‍♀️ The speaker's desire to participate in activities typically associated with boys, like sports, faced societal pushback, illustrating gender stereotypes.
• 👗 The speaker's experiences with clothing and dress codes in school were restrictive and contributed to feelings of discomfort and depression.
• 🏫 The strict environment of the Catholic school further complicated the speaker's journey, as they faced daily reminders of societal gender norms.
• 🌈 The speaker's college years marked a turning point, where they found acceptance and the freedom to express their authentic self.
• 🚫 The script touches on the mental health struggles the speaker faced, including a suicide attempt, due to the pressures of conforming to gender norms.
• 💪 The speaker concludes with a commitment to living authentically, regardless of societal judgments, and the realization that their success comes from being true to themselves.

Q & A

What is the main issue the speaker faces regarding gender identity?

The speaker faces the issue of people persistently inquiring about their biological sex rather than understanding their gender identity, which leads to a feeling of discomfort and the perception that such questions are intrusive.

How does the speaker describe the concept of gender as a continuum?

The speaker describes gender as a multi-level continuum where individuals can identify anywhere from male to female or anywhere in between, including non-binary and genderqueer identities.

What is the difference between biological sex and gender identity according to the speaker?

Biological sex refers to what one is assigned at birth based on physical characteristics, while gender identity is how one feels on the inside and how they identify themselves, which can be male, female, or non-binary.

Why does the speaker feel that being asked about their biological sex is a 'creepy question'?

The speaker finds it 'creepy' because such questions are focused on physical attributes rather than understanding the individual's gender identity, which they consider a more personal and significant aspect of self.

What challenges did the speaker face in their early life related to gender expression?

The speaker faced challenges such as teasing, feeling restricted by gender norms, and not being allowed to participate in activities or wear certain clothes that were not traditionally associated with their assigned gender.

How did the speaker's experience in Catholic school affect their perception of gender norms?

The speaker's experience in Catholic school reinforced strict gender norms, causing them to feel constrained and judged, and contributing to their struggle with their gender identity.

What was the turning point for the speaker in terms of embracing their authentic self?

The turning point was when the speaker went to college, where they met people in the LGBT community, made friends who accepted them, and were able to experiment with their gender expression without judgment.

How did the speaker's mother respond to their gender identity and expression?

The speaker's mother was initially shocked and faced judgment from others, but she mostly stood up for the speaker, allowing them to participate in activities and try different clothing, despite societal pressures.

What impact did the speaker's gender expression have on their social life during high school?

The speaker's gender expression led to social isolation, with friends distancing themselves and feeling uncomfortable around them, which contributed to a period of severe depression and a suicide attempt.

What is the speaker's current approach to living their life after their college experience?

The speaker has decided to live their life authentically, embracing their true self and not being deterred by societal norms or judgments, as they have found that they are most successful and comfortable when being their genuine self.

How does the speaker address the misconception that gender identity is directly linked to sexual orientation?

The speaker clarifies that gender identity and sexual orientation are independent aspects of a person, with gender identity being about self-identification and sexual orientation being about who one is attracted to.