Reset your spiritual life. Get out of your comfort zone and go deep.
Summary
TLDRThe speaker addresses a deeply personal email about the struggle with faith and the fear of losing it, drawing parallels to their own experiences. They discuss the risk of formalizing faith and the importance of a personal spiritual reset, urging the listener to delve deep into their beliefs, challenge themselves, and create a genuine connection with Christ. The message is a heartfelt call to rediscover the essence of faith and to embrace the journey of spiritual growth, even in the face of fear and uncertainty.
Takeaways
- 🙏 The speaker acknowledges the struggle of losing faith and the fear of drifting away from spiritual connection, particularly after experiencing a significant loss.
- 🌱 The speaker suggests that faith can sometimes become formalized or institutionalized, leading to a disconnection from its true essence.
- 🔄 The concept of 'resetting' one's faith is introduced, likening it to resetting a machine to its factory settings, but with the aim of reconnecting with God and love.
- 📣 Two announcements are made: the opening of summer pilgrimages to Iona and other islands, and the offer of free hospitality at the monastery for shorter visits.
- 🗺️ The speaker invites participation in pilgrimages not only for spiritual growth but also as a means of supporting the monastery's survival and work.
- 🏛️ Mention of a pilgrimage to Moldavia, the speaker's monastic home, highlighting the richness of the region's monastic and spiritual history.
- 🤝 The speaker expresses a desire to meet people in person during upcoming visits to the United States, offering hugs and blessings beyond the digital medium.
- 💔 The importance of revisiting the foundational reasons for one's faith is emphasized, especially after experiencing a traumatic event.
- 🛑 The speaker warns against the dangers of prioritizing worldly life over spiritual life, which can lead to an internal conflict and a weakened faith.
- 🧗♂️ An encouragement to delve deep into one's faith, to challenge and explore the depths of spirituality without relying on comfort zones.
- 🔥 The necessity of creating a personal and transformative relationship with Christ, moving beyond superficial practices to a genuine and profound connection.
- 🔮 The power of icons and solitude in deepening one's spiritual journey, as well as the importance of finding what resonates personally in one's quest for faith.
Q & A
What is the main concern expressed by the person in the transcript?
-The main concern is the feeling of their faith slowly draining away, similar to a broken vessel losing water, and the fear of returning to a state of almost losing their faith.
What traumatic event is mentioned in the transcript that affected the person's faith in the past?
-The person lost their best friend to cancer about seven years ago, which caused their life to collapse and their faith to barely survive.
What is the speaker's advice for someone experiencing a crisis of faith?
-The speaker advises going through a 'reset' process, similar to resetting a machine to factory settings, but with the aim of resetting oneself to the foundation of faith and the love of God.
What is the risk mentioned in the transcript that can affect one's faith?
-The risk is that we might institutionalize or formalize our faith, which can lead to a disconnection from the living essence of faith.
What is the significance of the summer pilgrimages mentioned in the transcript?
-The summer pilgrimages are organized week-long trips to beautiful parts of Mall Iona and other islands, providing an opportunity for participants to pray and connect with their faith in a deeper way.
What is the speaker's view on the balance between spiritual and worldly life?
-The speaker believes that ideally, spiritual and worldly life should be imbued with each other, with life in the world being a form of prayer itself. However, often one is prioritized over the other, leading to an internal split and tension.
What does the speaker suggest as a way to rediscover one's faith?
-The speaker suggests going deep into one's faith, challenging everything, and creating a secret with Christ, doing something that resembles walking on water or doing good deeds in secret.
What is the importance of the 'core of your being' in the context of the transcript?
-The 'core of your being' refers to the true self, the foundation of one's faith. Rediscovering this core is essential to rebuilding faith anew and reconnecting with God.
What role do icons play in the speaker's personal spiritual journey?
-Icons are essential to the speaker's spiritual journey, providing a means of connection with God, especially during times of solitude and deep contemplation.
What is the speaker's advice for maintaining the spiritual 'heat' of one's heart?
-The speaker advises against opening the 'door of the heart' unwisely, as it can lead to the loss of spiritual heat that took a long time to build. Instead, one should create a secret with Christ and engage in acts of devotion and service.
Outlines
🙏 Spiritual Dryness and Faith Crisis
The speaker begins by sharing a personal struggle with spiritual dryness and a fear of losing faith. They recount the experience of losing a best friend to cancer, which nearly shattered their faith. Despite attempts to maintain religious practices, the speaker feels their faith slipping away, akin to a broken vessel losing water. They express gratitude for the heartfelt email from Seraphima, which resonates deeply with their own experience, and acknowledges the risk of institutionalizing faith and the need for a 'reset' to reconnect with God and love.
🌳 Announcing Summer Pilgrimages and Free Hospitality
The speaker announces the availability of summer pilgrimages to the beautiful isles of Mull, Iona, and others, which have been organized annually since 2014 or 2015. These pilgrimages offer a week-long spiritual journey, including time at the Monastery of Caninian on Iona. For those unable to commit to a full week or lacking the means, the monastery continues to offer free hospitality for up to three nights. Additionally, there is mention of a pilgrimage to the painted monasteries of Moldavia, the speaker's monastic home, which promises an overwhelming experience of the region's rich monastic heritage. The speaker also plans to visit the United States, with stops in Tennessee and California, offering an opportunity for in-person meetings and blessings.
🔄 Rediscovering Faith and Prioritizing Spiritual Life
The speaker discusses the need to rediscover the foundational reasons for becoming a Christian, beyond childhood baptism or parental influence. They emphasize the importance of personal conversion and the risk of formalizing faith, which can lead to an internal conflict between worldly and spiritual selves. The speaker encourages a deep dive into one's faith, challenging the comfort zones and the idolatry of a self-created God. They advocate for a radical realignment with the true God, as revealed in the gospels and teachings of the Holy Fathers, to avoid the pitfalls of a superficial spirituality.
🚶♂️ Embracing the Spiritual Journey and Overcoming Fear
The speaker calls for a profound exploration of one's spiritual life, urging individuals to venture into the depths of their faith where they may confront their fears and doubts. They caution against settling for a superficial, comfort-zone spirituality and instead advocate for a transformative relationship with Christ that is both loving and awe-inspiring. The speaker encourages acts of faith that may seem irrational to the worldly self but are life-giving to the spiritual self, such as wild camping in prayer or secretly performing good deeds for others.
🕊️ Rebuilding Faith and Finding One's True Self
In the final paragraph, the speaker offers guidance on how to rebuild faith by pressing the 'reset button' and rediscovering the foundational beliefs that anchor one's spirituality. They stress the importance of creating a personal and secret bond with Christ, which can involve solitary retreats or immersion in acts of charity. The speaker also highlights the significance of icons in facilitating a deeper connection with the divine. They conclude by blessing the audience, encouraging them to delve into the core of their being to find and embrace their true selves in the light of God's image.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Faith
💡Desert
💡Reset
💡Spiritual Life
💡Traumatic Event
💡Rediscovering
💡Spiritual Comfort Zones
💡Foundation of Faith
💡Christ
💡Transformation
💡Icons
Highlights
Personal struggle with faith and prayer, feeling a loss of connection with God.
The fear of losing faith, a deeply personal and frightening experience.
Past experience of losing a best friend to cancer, which nearly shattered faith.
The process of faith recovery after a traumatic event, and the recognition of similar signs of spiritual desert.
The risk of institutionalizing or formalizing faith, leading to a disconnect.
The concept of a 'reset' in faith, akin to resetting a machine to factory settings.
Announcement of summer pilgrimages to spiritual locations, offering a chance for communal prayer and reflection.
Invitation to join week-long pilgrimages or enjoy the monastery's free hospitality.
The importance of supporting the monastery through pilgrimages for survival and spiritual growth.
Upcoming personal visits to the United States for spiritual meetings and blessings.
The need for a personal rediscovery of the reasons for becoming a Christian.
The impact of prioritizing worldly life over spiritual life, causing an internal conflict.
The necessity of returning to the foundational reasons for faith, such as the fear of death and the desire for eternal existence.
Encouragement to delve deep into one's faith, confronting fears and challenging oneself spiritually.
The danger of creating a 'comfort zone' in faith that leads to idolatry and a false image of God.
The importance of creating a personal and secret relationship with Christ, moving beyond superficial spirituality.
The transformative power of engaging in acts of service and charity as a form of deep spiritual practice.
The personal journey of rediscovering one's true self and the image of God within.
The significance of icons and solitude in deepening one's spiritual connection.
The promise of a renewed and reborn faith after pressing the 'reset' button on one's spiritual life.
Transcripts
in the last year or so I have slowly
become a very dry in my prayer
and I have started to fear that I may be
losing my faith
I cannot imagine my life without Christ
I cannot even say the words I do not
believe
but something is changing in me
and I am frightened
about seven years ago I lost my best
friend to cancel I'm so sorry
when he died my whole life collapsed and
my faith was barely surviving
it was a disaster in my life and I
functioned for a while maybe a full year
as if I had no faith until somehow my
love and my trust in God returned
nothing like that happened this time
but I recognized the signs I recognize
the same desert around me
I try to fit as much time in church as I
can I pray as much as I am able but
slowly I feel as if my faith is draining
out of me like a broken vessel that is
losing water
this scares me very much because I know
the hell of almost losing my faith and I
do not want to return there
oh this is such a beautiful such a a
painful but such a beautiful email thank
you thank you very much seraphima this
this is a something that goes straight
to my heart
and I know
I know what you're talking about
unfortunately or by the grace of God it
depends how you look at it I know what
it feels like to to have experienced
life with capital life in you and then
to only
be left with the memory of life where
life wants dwelt you just have this
Shadow and a memory which is almost
painful
and
there is a risk that we we
institutionalize our faith there is a
risk that we somehow formalize our faith
and that can have this effect
Earth is also you know as in your
experience
um something horrible like losing
someone whom we love dearly or a
traumatic event can challenge our faith
but
but the time now is for you to go
through almost like like a reset
you know like those machines or whatever
machines We Buy in our homes if they
have a reset button and reset them to
factory settings we need to from time to
time press that button in ourselves and
reset ourselves to to factory settings
only that instead of being you know made
in China or made in the USA we are made
in gold and by God in love and by love
so we need to reset our settings to God
and to love
but before I go into that I've already
been you know Carried Away by it because
I genuinely love your letter it does so
much heart in it but before I go into it
I have I have to make two announcements
and I don't want the things to be mixed
up so allow me to do this for half a
minute
the first one is that I've realized I
have never actually announced to all of
you that we have opened our summer
pilgrimages every summer as you know
since I believe
2014 or 15. we are running these
organized week-long pilgrimages that
take you to the most beautiful parts of
Mall Iona and some of the other islands
around Mal and Iona such as Saint
Brandon's island or Saint Kenneth's
Island
we go there together we pray there
together we spend a full week
on mall at the monastery at caninian and
on Iona in our pilgrimage on the island
of Iona
and if you are interested in joining us
we still have places available for some
reason I always forget that YouTube is
not Facebook so when I announce
something on Facebook I imagine that
I've already died here as well so I'll
leave the details in the first comment
to this video if you are interested in
joining us please do
if you do not have the time to be with
us for a full week or if you don't have
the funds to afford one of these long
paid pilgrimages that's fine we still
carry on our monastic tradition of
welcoming you and offering you free
Hospitality so three nights whenever you
come assuming within the limits of our
you know accommodation you can stay with
us for free we'll feed you we'll talk to
you we'll play with you we'll give you
all our love
this week long
um pilgrimages allow us to get to places
we are not
able to get to otherwise simply because
it's it's expensive to run sailing boats
and to rent motor boats and to you know
move about uh to do these things and it
also Keeps Us Alive and there's no shame
in working for your survival there's no
shame in work there's no shame in
survival
so if you can come and join these
pilgrimages you are welcome and you are
greatly contributing to our Monastery if
you cannot come you are still welcome
and we would love to meet you person to
person and to play with you
and there is also a pilgrimage to
Moldavia to the painted monasteries of
Moldavia that's my home that's my
monastic home and um it's like taking
you in my in my parents living room or
in the old home where my grandparents
used to live and where I was a child
um maybe I should record a video about
that one because it is something that
especially you Christians in the west
you have a hundred percent not
experienced the madness
The Madness of a small region small
region that has hundreds of monasteries
and skids and hermitages and this does
not include the hundreds of Parish
churches and missions and everything
else
it is so beautiful that it just it's
overwhelming and I need to prepare
better if I am to present that
pilgrimage to you
and to finish this
um speaking of pilgrimages I shall visit
your country if you live in the United
States for two Sundays I think it's the
weekend of February
12th and February 19th
so if you're anywhere close to Franklin
in Tennessee
I shall be at the Parish of Saint
Ignatius there if you're anywhere close
to Santa Rosa in California I shall be
at the Cathedral of Saint sarafim in
Santa Rosa
and I shall also be
next week actually on
Thursday
I'll include the dates below but the
Cathedral of Saint John maximovic or San
Francisco in San Francisco so if you
want to meet in person if you want to
just have a chat I would love to get
Beyond this
machine and just be able to give you a
proper proper monastic hug and a proper
in-person blessing
now we owe a lot to to seraphima because
this this is clearly an email she wrote
out of her heart
and um
and it requires an answer from one's
heart
we've said that sometimes not only you
seraphim about all of us we have to go
through a process of
rediscovering
the reason why we've become Christians
in the first place I'm not talking about
just being baptized as a child I'm not
talking about being dragged to church by
your parents I'm talking about that
process of a personal conversion you
need to go back to the stone to the
foundation of your faith and sometimes
that is challenged because of a
traumatic event something like losing
someone you love very dearly and the
experience of you losing your friend is
such an event
but most of the times it happens because
we have slowly managed to somehow
formalize our faith
and turn something that was meant to be
alive into something that is just a
formality
and that happens almost always because
there's
a misbalance between our priorities we
have our spiritual life and we have the
worldly life
ideally
they are
imbued with each other ideally your life
in the world is prayer itself
and perhaps we should talk about that in
some other video but what happens in in
the case of most of us is that we make a
choice and we prioritize one over the
other
and if we prioritize our worldly
existence our worldly life over our
spiritual life
that creates a tension in you it's
almost as if that creates another you
within you you've got the worldly self
and then you've got the spiritual self
and there is a tension between them
because each of them demons their rights
they all scream for their rights and
that creates a split an internal split
in you and that is going to be painful
and out of that either one or the other
will win
there's no way both of them can win
and this is begins
you need to go back to the stone that
Foundation of your faith for some of us
such as in my case that is a fear of
death not death as in the process of
dying of course I'm not looking forward
to it like anyone else but it's not that
that scares me it's the thought of
going back into nothingness
thought that everything that that that
spark of of being of existence in me and
in you and in every human being I've met
might somehow be extinguished
that thought
is us alive today in me as it was 20
something years ago when I decided to
enter a monastery
that for me is the bottom line that is
the stone foundation of my faith
a need to fight for my being so that I
may be and not be extinguished into
nothingness
go deep my dear Sarafina go deep go
where the waters are deep swimming The
Most Dangerous Waters go into the most
dangerous zones of your faith go where
you are afraid to go don't revert back
into our spiritual comfort zones because
we all build them up but the thing the
truth about these spiritual comfort
zones is that they are built around a
fake God they are built around an idol
and it's actually a process of idolatry
rather than believing in Christ the
Living God and that's what I meant by
formalization
go deep go where it's dangerous go where
you're afraid forget about the forgive
me
lovey-dovey version of Christ my best
friend who travels this journey of life
with me holding my hand and we skip
together through fill the flowers that
doesn't exist
that doesn't exist except in like you
know kindergarten Christianity
Christ God is frightening not in the way
in which someone who wants to harm us is
frightening but he is frightening
because he is the only source of being
and our only hope to be in eternity to
exist in eternity to be be one with him
our only hope is his free will his free
love for us and it is a frightening a
paralyzing thought that somehow we might
lose that
that's our only hope
don't revert in your comfort zones
because in a comfort zone
we worship a god whom we created
according to our image we take God as
revealed in the gospel and by the
teaching of the Holy fathers and then
instead of holding on to the fullness of
the revelation we pick and choose we
choose to ignore parts we don't like and
we exacerbate the parties that we love
and instead of looking at God as he is
as he revealed himself to us
instead of doing that we end up looking
at praying to and worshiping a God we
have created according to our weakness
we take the revealed God and we reshape
him in the image of our fallenness
instead of that and where life resides
where life dwells we should
allow ourselves to be reshaped in the
image of his being
that's what I mean when I say don't look
for an easy way out there is no easy way
out this is a matter of not even life
versus death
because every human being Christian or
not a Believer or not has to deal with
that we all know that we should die and
we all have to deal with that and every
human being even non-christians or
non-believers find a way to deal with
death this is a question of falling back
into nothingness
all being
residing dwelling existing in the being
of God in the act of God's being in
eternity
this is the battle this is what is a
stake
and for this you cannot
play it's safe you cannot
go where it's comfortable and easy
faith is not meant to be easy faith is
supposed to crucify us
which is what you're experiencing
so that we discover that the source of
True Life capital L is in Christ alone
not in the world
create
a story with Christ
create a secret with him make him his
accomplice in your secret spiritual life
close the door
of your room the door of your heart
and make it all happen in the remember
the words of the desert fathers who
taught us that it takes long years or
decades to heat up ourselves
the room of our heart it takes decades
to make a fire and to heat it up and it
takes one hour of opening it unwisely
in order to lose all that heat that it
took so long to create
create a secret with Christ do something
that resembles in your life walking on
water do something wild do jump in your
faith let go of the tediousness and the
safety nets of your daily spiritual life
and do something that is mad
in the eyes of the world around you and
in the perception of your worldly self
because what is mad and unjustified in
the perceptions of your worldly self is
going to be life-giving
for your spiritual self
go deep deep inside my dear Sarah FEMA
don't be afraid to challenge everything
in you because if you do it in a spirit
of obedience if you do it in a spirit of
humility before God and with complete
nakedness honesty before him if you do
it not as an act of rebellion but as an
act of honest truthful searching for him
he will be there guiding you he will be
there blessing you and
pouring upon you much more than you
could have even hoped for go deep deep
deep to the core of your being to the
marrow of yourself of your true self
discover the being the core of your
being and bless it and and act on it you
know I frequently end these videos by
blessing you and I say may may you be
blessed with the core of your being to
the marrow of your being I don't mean
that
as beautiful words as a metaphor I
actually have this in my mind I actually
mean the core of your being the marrow
of who you are what makes you uniquely
yourself
do whatever works for you to get back in
touch with that
and then
and then once you've rediscovered who
you are face again this loving yet
frightful
all inspiring God
swim deep though where all dwells were
all resides and that's where you'll
ReDiscover Who You Are
and that's how you're going to
ReDiscover close True Image reflected on
who you are
if you lose sight of Who You Are
it is impossible to clearly see the
reflected image of God in your heart
I could give you lots of examples of
what this means but it's so personal
it's so Uniquely Yours that the examples
I've heard from others in confession may
seem completely off to you but just as
an example I know people who go wild
camping they just they just take three
four a week off and they just take a
tent and they go all alone and they just
pray in the wilderness and that actually
works for them I know people who do the
opposite they just immerse themselves in
doing good deeds for other people I know
people who just cook until they drop and
then they go out on this feeding spree
and they share food with all the
homeless people that they can meet in
the hometown and they do that for a few
days or they do it recurrently a few
days every week or at least you know a
few days every month
and they do it all in secret
for the reason I've told you because if
it's not your secret with God if it's
not your secret with Christ the glue
between you and him is very
comes undone very easily
for me
I require to be alone
physically removed I require a physical
distance between me and other human
beings
the greater that distance the more alone
I am the more space I have to look
around and see nothing
the closer I am to Christ
the more I can literally fall down and
scream
until I pour my being out
the closer I am to God
and icons icons are essential to me so
hiding somewhere all alone I've I've
actually experienced when I was in
Moldavia in my Monastery moments of such
deep
I don't want to call it depression
because it wasn't depression I've I've
experienced depression as well and I
know the difference it's just a lack of
life that all I wanted to do and all
I've done was to just hide in a closet
you just go into a closet or you hide
under your bed I've done both and you
stay there for hours and just staring
staring at an icon or staring at a white
wall if that white wall for you is an
image of God's
unknowable essence
anything everything can work if it is
the right thing for you but only you and
your spiritual father will know what the
right thing is for you
press that reset button my dear
seraphimov
and I promise you that once you hit
tone again once you find that Foundation
of your faith again
you will be able to rebuild your faith
not as before but completely anew
completely on you
be blessed
all of you my dear ones be blessed to
the Core
the foundation the marrow of your being
amen
amen
amen
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