Kierkegaard on Love
Summary
TLDRIn *Works of Love*, Søren Kierkegaard critiques the prevalent notion of Romantic love, advocating instead for a broader, more Christian concept of love rooted in forgiveness and compassion. He distinguishes between erotic love, based on admiration, and true love (*kaerlighed*), which requires loving even those we consider unworthy. Kierkegaard challenges our desire for justice, emphasizing that unconditional love, not justice, should guide our relationships. Through a 'ladder of love,' he argues that the highest form of love involves loving everyone, without exception. Kierkegaard's ideas remain relevant, urging us to move beyond superficial attraction and embrace love's transformative power.
Takeaways
- 😀 Kierkegaard challenges the popular idea of romantic love, urging us to expand our understanding of love beyond attraction to a broader, more inclusive form.
- 😀 He differentiates between two types of love: *kaerlighed* (true love) and *elskov* (erotic love), advocating for the former as a more authentic expression of human connection.
- 😀 Romantic love, according to Kierkegaard, creates a narrow view of love, focused on admiration for specific qualities in another person, rather than on unconditional love for all.
- 😀 Kierkegaard argues that true love requires us to love those we might naturally find difficult or unworthy to love, such as those we disagree with or who offend us.
- 😀 His conception of love is rooted in Christian ethics, where love is not about admiration, but about seeing the humanity and struggles in others and extending compassion.
- 😀 Kierkegaard criticizes the pursuit of justice, suggesting that a world where everyone receives what they deserve would be unlivable and intolerant.
- 😀 He proposes that love, rather than justice, should be the goal of human interactions, as justice often leads to harsh judgments, while love fosters understanding and forgiveness.
- 😀 In Kierkegaard's 'ladder of love,' the first step is to love those who love us, but the highest form of love is to love all people unconditionally, including those who harm us.
- 😀 He critiques the 'selfishness of preferential love,' where people restrict their affection to those who meet certain standards, thus excluding many from the possibility of love.
- 😀 Kierkegaard encourages us to move beyond the pursuit of a perfect partner and instead love all people based on shared humanity, not personal admiration or virtue.
Q & A
What is Kierkegaard's main critique of Romantic love?
-Kierkegaard critiques Romantic love for narrowing the concept of love to admiration for a special, idealized individual. He believes this focus on attraction to beauty, purity, or accomplishment leads to a limited and impoverished understanding of love.
How does Kierkegaard define true love in contrast to erotic love?
-Kierkegaard distinguishes between 'kaerlighed' (true love), which is unconditional and expansive, and 'elskow' (erotic love), which is based on admiration and attraction. True love, according to him, requires loving everyone, even those we may instinctively deem unworthy.
What does Kierkegaard mean by 'kaerlighed'?
-'Kaerlighed' is the Christian concept of love that requires us to love others universally and selflessly, even those we may consider unworthy or offensive. It emphasizes compassion, forgiveness, and understanding, rather than admiration or attraction.
Why does Kierkegaard believe that most people do not understand love?
-Kierkegaard argues that most people misunderstand love because they equate it with the excitement or admiration felt for someone attractive or special. This narrow view, he says, overlooks the deeper and more challenging aspects of love, which involve loving everyone, even those we find difficult.
How does Kierkegaard view the pursuit of justice compared to the practice of love?
-Kierkegaard critiques the pursuit of justice as overly rigid and unforgiving, arguing that if everyone received exactly what they deserved, the world would be unlivable. He suggests that love, on the other hand, offers a more compassionate and humane alternative to strict justice, focusing on kindness rather than punishment.
What is the 'ladder of love' that Kierkegaard describes?
-The 'ladder of love' is a concept Kierkegaard introduces to describe the progression of loving others. It starts with loving those who love us, moves to loving those who do not love us, then loving those who persecute us, and ultimately reaching the highest form of love, which is loving everyone without exception.
How does Kierkegaard criticize the concept of 'preferential love' in romantic relationships?
-Kierkegaard criticizes 'preferential love' as selfish, where people choose romantic partners based on specific qualities like appearance, income, or humor. He argues that this kind of selective love is fundamentally flawed and overlooks the broader Christian imperative to love everyone equally.
What is Kierkegaard's stance on loving those we find hateful or objectionable?
-Kierkegaard believes that true love requires us to love those we find hateful or objectionable, particularly those who have wronged us or behaved in ways we dislike. He emphasizes that Christ's example of unconditional love, even toward those who repeatedly fail or hurt us, should guide our own actions.
What does Kierkegaard mean when he says love is the 'fulfillment of a law'?
-By stating that love is the 'fulfillment of a law,' Kierkegaard suggests that love is not just an emotion or a personal choice, but a moral imperative that reflects the highest form of Christian ethics. It is a commandment to love universally, regardless of merit or personal feelings.
How does Kierkegaard use the example of Christ's love for Peter to illustrate his philosophy on love?
-Kierkegaard uses the example of Christ's love for Peter, despite his repeated failures, to show that true love does not require others to change or be perfect first. Instead, love is extended to individuals as they are, with all their flaws, imperfections, and failures, just as Christ loved Peter unconditionally.
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