What Makes A Person Attractive?: Attraction Broken Down

Summary

In this video, Hwome Bukari discusses the four pillars of attraction: height, face, physique, and energy. He emphasizes that while physical attributes are important, energy, which includes body language and confidence, is the most critical and challenging to improve. Bukari shares personal anecdotes and advice on overcoming insecurities and embracing one's unique qualities to boost attractiveness. He encourages viewers to 'own it' when it comes to their perceived shortcomings, as confidence and self-acceptance are key to being perceived as attractive.

Takeaways

• 🌟 The four pillars of attraction are height, face, physique, and energy.
• 🔑 Energy is considered the most important pillar as it encompasses body language, tonality, and overall confidence.
• 🚹 For men, height can be artificially increased with the help of elevated shoes, which also boost confidence.
• 💪 Physical attributes like height, face, and physique are easier to improve compared to energy.
• 🤔 The speaker believes that anyone can become attractive within six months with the right effort, except for the energy aspect which is harder to change.
• 🧠 Overcoming limiting beliefs is crucial for improving one's energy and thus their attractiveness.
• 🌈 Embracing one's unique traits, such as ethnicity, is essential for boosting self-confidence and attractiveness.
• 👟 The speaker recommends owning any tools or methods used to improve attractiveness, like elevated shoes, without embarrassment.
• 💬 The way people treat you is a reflection of how you treat yourself; hence, self-respect is key to being treated well by others.
• 📈 Consistent practice and social interaction can significantly improve one's social skills and energy.
• 🏆 Failure and practice are necessary for growth; the most successful people have failed more times than others have tried.

Q & A

What are the four pillars of attraction mentioned in the script?

The four pillars of attraction mentioned are height, face, physique, and energy.

Why is energy considered the most important pillar of attraction?

Energy is considered the most important because it encompasses body language, tonality, how one speaks, walks, and conveys oneself, including personality and humor. It's also the hardest to change due to self-image, nervousness, and limiting beliefs.

How can someone improve their energy in terms of attraction?

Improving one's energy involves working on body language, speaking confidently, walking with assurance, and developing a positive self-image. It also includes overcoming limiting beliefs and nervousness.

What is the role of elevated shoes in enhancing attractiveness according to the script?

Elevated shoes can provide extra height, which not only makes a person look more attractive but also boosts their confidence, which in turn improves their energy and overall attractiveness.

What does the speaker mean by 'own it or it owns you'?

The speaker means that one should embrace and be confident about their attributes, whether they are perceived as weaknesses or strengths. If not embraced, these attributes can hold one back and define one's self-perception negatively.

How does the speaker suggest dealing with stereotypes or negative biases about one's ethnicity?

The speaker suggests owning one's ethnicity and using it as a strength. He advises improving personal hygiene and appearance to change negative stereotypes and to be confident in oneself.

What is the significance of the phrase 'others treat you how you treat yourself' in the script?

The phrase implies that the way one treats oneself influences how others perceive and treat them. It emphasizes the importance of self-respect and self-care in shaping one's social interactions.

How does the speaker describe the process of becoming more confident and attractive?

The speaker describes a process involving hard work, social practice, and self-improvement over two years. This includes forcing oneself to socialize, speak confidently, make eye contact, and build relationships.

What analogy does the speaker use to explain the importance of practice in improving social skills?

The speaker uses the analogy of chess players, specifically mentioning Magnus Carlson and Hikaru Nakamura, to illustrate that practice and action are key to improving at anything, including social skills.

What advice does the speaker give for someone who feels they are not attractive physically?

The speaker advises that even if someone is not physically attractive, they can still be treated well by others if they carry themselves with confidence and positive energy.

How does the speaker define attractiveness beyond physical appearance?

The speaker defines attractiveness beyond physical appearance by emphasizing confidence, positive energy, and the ability to carry oneself well in social situations.

Outlines

00:00

🔥 Introduction to the Four Pillars of Attraction

The speaker, Hwome Bukari, introduces the concept of the 'Four Pillars of Attraction,' which he posits as crucial for becoming a more attractive and charismatic individual. He humorously acknowledges that while these pillars may not cure cancer, they are essential for personal attraction. The pillars are described as the fundamental aspects of a human being that contribute to attractiveness. These include physical appearance, personality, and energy. The speaker emphasizes that while physical attributes are easier to define and improve, energy is complex and includes body language, tonality, and confidence. He admits that energy was the most challenging pillar for him to master and suggests that it is often the most difficult for others due to self-image and limiting beliefs.

05:01

👟 The Impact of Height and Confidence

Hwome discusses the importance of height as a physical attribute, suggesting that it can be enhanced through the use of elevated shoes to boost confidence. He shares his personal experience with these shoes, advocating for their use not just for the physical height increase but for the psychological boost they provide. He encourages viewers to embrace such tools without embarrassment, using the phrase 'own it or it owns you' as a mantra for self-acceptance and confidence. Hwome extends this advice to other aspects of identity, such as race and ethnicity, urging individuals to take pride in their unique characteristics and not let societal stereotypes define their self-worth.

10:04

💪 The Power of Physical Attraction and Energy

The speaker elaborates on how physical attributes like height, facial features, and physique contribute to attractiveness but are secondary to the power of energy. He asserts that even with the best looks, without the right energy, one cannot be truly attractive. Hwome explains that people's initial perceptions are based on appearance, but their lasting impressions are shaped by a person's energy. He stresses the importance of self-belief in attractiveness, suggesting that confidence can make a significant difference in how others perceive one's attractiveness. The speaker also touches on the idea that if one is not someone's physical type, self-confidence can still command respect, even if it doesn't lead to attraction.

15:05

🌟 Overcoming Obstacles and Embracing Personal Growth

Hwome shares his personal journey of self-improvement, focusing on developing his social skills and energy despite not having the genetic advantages. He talks about the hard work and practice involved in becoming more confident and socially adept, including forcing himself to engage in conversations and practice social cues. He emphasizes the importance of treating oneself with respect to be treated well by others and encourages continuous practice and self-improvement. The speaker concludes by inviting viewers to join his community for further support and ends the video on a positive note, highlighting the transformative power of self-belief and action.

Keywords

💡Attraction

Attraction in the context of the video refers to the process of becoming more appealing to others, particularly in a social or romantic sense. The video emphasizes that attraction is not solely about physical appearance but also involves one's energy, confidence, and charisma. The speaker discusses the 'four pillars of Attraction,' which are key components in enhancing one's attractiveness.

💡Four Pillars of Attraction

This concept is central to the video and represents the four main aspects that contribute to an individual's attractiveness. The pillars are described as height, face, physique, and energy. The speaker argues that while the first three are physical attributes, energy encompasses one's body language, tonality, and overall demeanor, which are crucial for attraction.

💡Energy

In the video, 'energy' is used to describe the non-physical aspects of a person that influence how they are perceived by others. It includes body language, tone of voice, confidence, and charisma. The speaker stresses that energy is the most important pillar of attraction because it affects how people interact with you and their overall perception of you.

💡Body Language

Body language is mentioned as a component of 'energy' and refers to the way a person uses their body to communicate non-verbally. Positive body language, such as good posture and open gestures, can signal confidence and approachability, which are attractive qualities.

💡Confidence

Confidence is portrayed as a critical aspect of an individual's energy and overall attractiveness. The speaker suggests that confidence can be developed and that it significantly impacts how others perceive and react to a person, even if their physical appearance is not conventionally attractive.

💡Physical Appearance

Physical appearance encompasses the visual aspects of a person, including height, facial features, and physique. The video discusses how these attributes can be improved through exercise, grooming, and dressing well, but also emphasizes that they are just one part of the broader concept of attraction.

💡Height

Height is one of the physical attributes mentioned in the 'Four Pillars of Attraction.' The speaker notes that while height is generally considered an attractive quality for men, it can be artificially enhanced through shoes that add inches, which can also boost confidence and, by extension, one's energy.

💡Personality

Personality is discussed in relation to 'energy,' highlighting that an individual's humor, conversational skills, and how they carry themselves are part of what makes them attractive. A positive and engaging personality can make up for deficiencies in physical appearance.

💡Stereotypes

Stereotypes are briefly touched upon when the speaker discusses how certain ethnicities or groups may be perceived in society. The video encourages viewers to 'own' their identity and not let stereotypes define them, suggesting that self-confidence and positive self-image can overcome societal biases.

💡Self-Improvement

Self-improvement is a recurring theme in the video, as the speaker shares personal anecdotes and advice on how to work on one's appearance, energy, and personality to become more attractive. It's presented as an ongoing process that requires effort and practice.

Highlights

The four pillars of Attraction are crucial for becoming a more attractive, charismatic person.

Attraction is primarily between human beings and is based on a few key components.

The four pillars include physical appearance, personality, and energy.

Physical appearance is divided into height, face, and physique.

Energy encompasses body language, tonality, and overall presence.

Energy is the most important and challenging pillar to improve.

Improving energy can significantly change how others perceive you.

The presenter claims they can make anyone attractive in six months with the right circumstances.

For height, the presenter recommends wearing elevated shoes to boost confidence.

Confidence gained from wearing elevated shoes can improve one's energy.

The presenter encourages owning one's appearance and not being embarrassed by it.

Embracing one's ethnicity or background can add to one's uniqueness and attractiveness.

The presenter shares personal experiences with self-consciousness and how to overcome it.

The concept of 'own it or it owns you' is introduced as a way to turn weaknesses into strengths.

Physical appearance is important, but energy is what shapes others' perception of you.

If you believe you're attractive, others are more likely to find you attractive.

The presenter emphasizes the importance of treating oneself well to be treated well by others.

The presenter shares personal stories of social anxiety and how to overcome it.

Practice and action are key to improving social skills and energy.

The presenter offers resources and a community for those seeking to improve their attractiveness.

Transcripts

hello everyone hwome bukari here today

and today's video topic is why the four

pillars of Attraction are actually the

most important things in the universe

now maybe not in the entire universe

maybe like uh you know cancer curing

things are better but when it comes to

attraction becoming a hotter more

attractive charismatic guy man which is

what you want to become if you're

watching this video I would assume then

you need to focus on the four pillars of

Attraction I have made these I have made

this up this is my idea if I could brand

it and take it and [ __ ] pattern it I

would but I can't or I don't know how to

the best way to describe the four

pillars

are it is basically what makes up a

human being makes up what attractive is

right because the attraction is between

two human beings unless you're into

beastiality but between human beings

there's only a couple things that

literally makes up who you are and the

four pillars basically breaks that down

it is your look it is basically your

physical like body and it is your

personality the soul inside of you so

let me tell you what the four pillars

are it's not energy I mean [ __ ] so let

me tell you what the four pillars are

that is your height your face your

physique and your energy

three of these are your

physical and one of them is your energy

that is all of you

inside your energy also is your body

language your tonality and how you speak

do you speak in a confident manner do

you speak in a shy

manner it is how you walk it is how you

convey yourself your personality your

humor everything like that that is in

your energy the other three things are

your looks your physical being is very

easy to be break down energy is very

hard to break down there's a lot of

different components and that's why I

leave it as energy it's a very big

pillar and it's the most important

pillar um it's it's also the hardest

pillar for most guys um especially it

was the hardest pillar for me I I I can

make any the thing is you can you I can

basically make anyone attractive in six

months I can make anyone attractive

given you know circum certain

circumstances I can make anyone

attractive in six months that is very

hard to do with the energy portion

because some people just have such bad

images about themselves they just have

such nervousness about themselves they

just have such limiting beliefs meaning

they do not think certain ways I

think there are I think I think like

this I find that girl cute I need I want

to go talk to her to to find out if

she's cool or if she likes

me that thought that thought does not

even cross some guys guy some guy's mind

all they think is oh my God that girl is

hot as [ __ ] um I can never get a girl

like her way out of my

league even though those guys are

probably more attractive than me they're

missing the energy attribute that's why

it's so

important now the physical is broken

down into to three components your

height your looks on your face your face

looks and your physique your

body for a guy height is basically

[Music]

um hard to change there are shoes you

can get that gives you an extra two

inches those are called elevated

shoes I'm I'm looking if I have mine

around those are [ __ ] amazing if

you're like 5'6 and you want to be 5'9

wear those shoes right if you're going

out to a club and you're just going to

be out there for like 4 hours or like 2

hours or you're just going out for the

night wear those [ __ ] shoes they will

give you an extra two to three inches

and make you look taller that will make

you look not only will it make you look

more attractive the thing is it'll make

you look a bit more attractive a bit

more attractive a

bit but the main thing is the confidence

you would get you will get from wearing

them the thing is like I when you wear

those shoes and you just you're just

three inches taller it's just like damn

you just feel more confident and from

that your energy right raises that is

why I recommend them so much not because

of the actual height that you get on

them but because of the energy you get

on them because of the energy you get on

them and now event after you wear them

so much the energy will actually stay

the same you will raise a bit raise a

bit but it will stay the same

even when you take them off you should

remember how you feel with them on and

your energy should still be a bit higher

you objectively should have a higher

energy after having those if anyone

calls you out on it you have to own

it you see what that thing says right

there I don't know if it's backwards but

that says own it or it owns

you the reason I'm telling you about

these shoes and I'm so not afraid

of of telling you or embarrassed of

telling you that I have these shoes I

have two pairs of those shoes and

they're [ __ ] awesome both of them

these elevated shoes that give me an

extra two Ines two to three inches and

make me taller even though I'm not that

tall yes I wear those shoes and I love

them is because I believe in that I

believe in that strongly that it helps

you that is why I'm able to tell you

with without feeling embarrassed about

about having myself so many of you guys

will feel embarrassed about wearing them

if you ever get called out on them you

will feel extremely embarrassed and you

will shut down the best thing you could

do in that

situation the best thing you could do is

own it or it owns you yeah I wear the

shoes they make me feel hotter so

what what are people going to say after

that the [ __ ] girl wear makeup do you

look like that no but it makes them feel

hotter so what you have to [ __ ] own

it or it owns you that goes for anything

in your life that that you feel is

holding you back own it or it owns

you um a big thing I hear from guys is I

can't I'm Asian I'm Brown I'm this I'm

that no you're a [ __ ] own it or it owns

you I

personally before a while ago was

self-conscious about my

skin no girl would like a brown

skinn Pakistani man right everyone from

my uh Indian culture is hated upon in

North America because they're an

infestation and parasite okay but guess

what I'm not why cuz I am me I'm

different and I bring actually something

um valuable I believe in myself that I'm

valuable I still think that a lot of

other brown people are very not hygienic

good-look I believe that is a stereotype

for a

reason if they worked on that The

Stereotype would change but they don't

that's their problem I have worked on

myself I feel confident in myself there

is so many brown people Asian people

black

people that work on themselves look good

themselves yet still have that negative

bias because of other people what the

[ __ ] you're not those people own it

you're your own self right and then when

I am good looking I feel right I like

that that is a me thing I feel that I am

able to act more confidently I'm able to

just be myself my energy is just boom

boom boom higher

but I'm not I'm owning it I'm not

letting it own me I'm owning it I am

Brown that makes me hter it makes me

different than the [ __ ] average

person it adds to my flare to my

uniquity it gives me different

perspectives about the world it gives me

like right it adds to me it adds to

me I'm black that adds to me I'm Asian

that adds to me it this [ __ ] is

different the uniqueness is you make

you've heard this since you're a

kid but they haven't told you it it was

just very hard because they didn't tell

you like the specifics you have to use

it in I'm telling you the

specifics you feel bad about something

you feel embarrassed about something

that you're doing or that you are or

that you like or you can't

change and it drags you down own it or

it owns you I have it written on my wall

own it or it owns you

once you start using your weaknesses as

strengths that that is like the truest

form of confidence that is the truest

form of just like

openness you can't judge people at that

point you're not you can't like you you

don't judge you're not afraid of being

judged you're okay with yourself you're

making your weaknesses your strengths

you're okay with yourself

the looks the height and the physique

huge huge you can improve these and you

can keep getting more and more and more

and more more attractive if you have all

these thre these three three things

maxed

out height say you're like 6'4 best

looking person in the world and you have

the physique of like a [ __ ] Greek

scat statue

you can get any girl you want in the

world but you won't because you don't

have the energy if you with all those

looks still acted like a [ __ ] like a

[ __ ] made man people would trade you

like treat you like a [ __ ] made

man not at first they would give you a

lot of leeway if you look like a [ __ ]

made man people would treat you like a

[ __ ] made man at first but if you look

like a Greek god people are going to

treat you like a Greek god until proven

otherwise people are are going to treat

you how you look until proven otherwise

I'm going to say that again people are

going to treat you how you look

look until proven

otherwise and you prove them otherwise

with your

energy so your looks are the first step

in the door they're first look anyone's

first look at you but the energy is

everything after it and that compl

completely

shapes someone's perception about you

whether they think you're attractive or

not attractive because it comes from you

all in all if you believe you're

attractive people will find you more

attractive now if you're not someone's

type like you're physically not

someone's type and you find yourself

attractive they will respect that they

will be like okay fair enough you find

yourself attractive you're just not my

type personally

right at that point you just move on

there's not there's not nothing you can

do

right there's nothing you could do if

you already have maxed out your looks

your Heights your face your physique

your

height as to someone still doesn't find

you

attractive that's a good thing that's a

good thing there are billions of women

in this world there are billions of guys

in this world there are billions of

people in this world if one [ __ ]

person does not find you attractive that

means you can move on to the rest

don't get hung

up your energy

is the biggest

thing once your looks are

good so if you're com if you're very

overweight you're very

fat you're very unattractive physically

you're [ __ ] horribly disgusting to

look at

sorry it's going to be very hard for

people to give you

leeway on that because you've treated

yourself so like honestly your whole

life you have treated yourself like [ __ ]

so they're going to treat you like [ __ ]

right that's what you've asked for you

treat people how you treat yourself

others treat you how you treat yourself

others treat you how you treat yourself

damn I should write that down too others

treat you like you treat yourself [ __ ]

I'm gonna write that down after that's

good that's good that's going in the

Discord chat that's going in the

chat um

but you guys need

to you need to treat

yourself like you are a person of worth

for people to treat you like a person of

worth I did not

have Role Models or people to look up to

like that and so for most of my life I

treat myself

how how like like like [ __ ] man I

treated myself like [ __ ] like not very

good I treated my body poorly I treated

my mind

poorly and for that other people treated

me the same way I got bad reactions

negative reactions and and when I mean

reactions I don't mean like people were

walking down the street and they just no

no I mean like like people I always

could feel like people thought I was

weird and I always thought I was weird

but then I started practicing I started

getting better at socializing and then I

said oh I'm not weird I just wasn't

doing certain things I was just really

scared of speaking but now I can speak

and I'm not weird anymore I'm actually

very confident I'm a very cool guy and

now how do people treat me like a

confident cool guy and I love it I love

it you don't understand how much I love

that it's so awesome it's really good

dude like like just imagine just being

cool and confident and hot like life is

just so much easier for me I personally

love it but I wasn't there to begin with

and I didn't have the genetics the

genetics to get there I put in hard work

I put in two years of hard work pushing

myself to get the energy I needed like I

went to

[ __ ] I would go out talk to random

people start have random conversations

at my job I would literally force myself

to talk have conversations every single

day

I would force myself to make eye contact

I would force myself to speak in a

deeper voice I would force myself to

speak in a deeper louder louder is the

main thing louder

voice I would teach myself how to uh

make compliments or remarks or

statements I would teach myself how

to uh laugh with someone and put my hand

on their shoulder to

commodate them to build a relationship

you know a deeper relationship ask

people I taught myself had to ask people

questions how to navigate a conversation

and I've done it so many times I failed

a lot of times but I've won a couple

times and now I'm super [ __ ]

confident the winner has failed more

times than the failure has

tried true true true I play a lot of

chess the best chess player in the world

Magnus Carlson the best Blitz player in

the world hakaru Nakamura plays thous

like hundreds of chess games in a week

hundreds of chess games in a

week no one is catching up to that level

are you going how can you say you're bad

at social skills but you're not

practicing a 100 times a week you're not

talking to a 100 different people a

week right the the the main thing behind

everything is just [ __ ] action and

putting the input to get the

output anyways boys my name has been H

markari for the my entire life uh

Discord in the description if you need

more uh detailed questions about

anything going on in your life if you

want a community of people uh

like-minded guys around us and peace out

boys I hope you have a good one