When pressured to marry don't do these things!
Summary
TLDRIn today's episode of 'Real Talk with Da Podcast,' host Adida Emmanuel addresses the pressures of society on individuals to marry. Adida emphasizes the importance of making personal decisions about marriage without succumbing to external pressures, as it is a personal life choice with significant consequences. The podcast discusses the potential for pressured marriages to lead to divorce and encourages listeners to focus on their own plans, communicate with well-meaning friends and family, and maintain self-confidence in their decisions. Adida advises against rushing into marriage and highlights the financial implications of both marriage and divorce.
Takeaways
- đĄ Never marry out of pressure as it's a personal decision that impacts your life alone.
- đž Marriage and divorce are costly, avoid the cycle of rushing into marriage due to societal pressure.
- đ¶ The day after the wedding, you're alone with your spouse, so ensure it's the right choice for you.
- đ„ Don't let others' opinions or actions dictate your path; stay true to your own plans and desires.
- đ« Avoid succumbing to pressure that can lead to a wrong marriage, which is what you're trying to prevent.
- đŁïž Communicate with those pressuring you, expressing your need to focus on other aspects of life.
- đȘ Maintain confidence in your decisions and don't let external pressure sway you from your path.
- đ€ Pause and contemplate before making a marriage decision, it's not something to be rushed.
- đââïž Don't avoid social events or friends due to marriage pressure; face it with clarity and conviction.
- đ« Do not let the pressure to marry distract you from other important life goals like education or career.
Q & A
What is the main topic of the podcast episode?
-The main topic of the podcast episode is about the things one should not do when pressured to marry.
Why does the podcast host emphasize that marriage is a personal decision?
-The podcast host emphasizes that marriage is a personal decision because it is a significant life event that should not be influenced by external pressure, as it directly affects the individual's happiness and well-being.
What is the host's stance on the idea of marrying due to societal pressure?
-The host is against marrying due to societal pressure, arguing that it can lead to an unhappy and potentially disastrous marriage and divorce.
Why does the host suggest that one should not let others dictate their life choices?
-The host suggests that one should not let others dictate their life choices because each person is unique and has their own path, and making decisions based on pressure can lead to regret and dissatisfaction.
What does the host mean when they say 'the music fits you're going to have to dance to the tune'?
-The host means that when the right circumstances or conditions for marriage present themselves, and one is ready and willing, that's when they should proceed, not because of external pressure.
What advice does the host give regarding biological clock and loneliness as pressure points?
-The host advises that these are unnecessary pressures and that everyone has their own set of concerns; thus, there's no need to add to them by pressuring oneself or others.
Why is it important to listen to one's instincts when considering marriage, according to the host?
-According to the host, it is important to listen to one's instincts because they often provide an intuitive sense of what is right or wrong for the individual, and ignoring them can lead to poor decisions.
What does the host suggest as a strategy for dealing with friends and family who pressure one to marry?
-The host suggests communicating openly with those who pressure one to marry, expressing the desire to focus on other aspects of life and maintaining one's personal plan and goals.
Why does the host encourage maintaining focus on personal goals despite marriage pressure?
-The host encourages maintaining focus on personal goals because these goals contribute to one's overall happiness and success, and deviating from them due to pressure can lead to unfulfillment.
What is the host's view on rushing into marriage due to pressure?
-The host's view is that one should never rush into marriage due to pressure, as it can result in a wrong choice of partner and potential divorce, which are both costly and emotionally draining.
What final advice does the host give to those who are facing marriage pressure?
-The host advises to be confident in one's decisions, not to lose focus on other aspects of life, and to remember that marriage is a significant commitment that should not be entered into lightly due to external pressure.
Outlines
đ The Perils of Marrying Under Pressure
In the first paragraph, Adida Emmanuel addresses the issue of societal pressure to marry. He emphasizes that marriage is a personal decision and should not be influenced by external pressures. He points out that marriage is a significant financial commitment and that the consequences of a wrong choice can lead to divorce, which is equally costly. Adida advises listeners to be true to themselves and to communicate their stance to friends and family who might be pressuring them. He also encourages individuals to focus on their own plans and not let the pressure of marriage distract them from their personal goals. The paragraph concludes with a reminder that everyone has their own pace and path in life, and it's essential to stay confident and resolute in one's decisions regarding marriage.
đ« Avoiding the Pressure to Marry
The second paragraph continues the discussion on the topic of marrying under pressure. Adida stresses that one should not rush into marriage and that it's crucial to reflect on personal life goals and desires. He suggests that avoiding social events due to the fear of being pressured about marriage is not the solution; instead, individuals should maintain their focus and not let the pressure dictate their life choices. Adida also cautions against neglecting other important aspects of life, such as education and career, in the pursuit of finding a spouse. The paragraph ends with a reminder of the high costs associated with both marriage and divorce, reinforcing the message that one should not succumb to pressure when it comes to making such a significant life decision.
Mindmap
Keywords
đĄpressure to marry
đĄmarriage
đĄdivorce
đĄbiological clock
đĄinstinct
đĄplan
đĄcommunication
đĄfocus
đĄself-love
đĄwillpower
đĄcontemplation
Highlights
Marriage should not be rushed due to societal pressure as it can lead to divorce.
It's important to dance to the tune of your own life, not someone else's expectations.
The pressure to marry can come from well-intentioned friends and family.
Biological clock and fear of dying alone are common pressures that are unnecessary.
Everyone has personal struggles, so there's no need to add pressure on others or oneself.
Marriage should be a mutual decision between both partners, not forced by external pressure.
Trust your instincts; if something feels off, it probably is.
Have your own plan and don't let pressure divert you from your goals.
Communicate with those pressuring you and set boundaries.
Being confident in your decisions is crucial, especially when it comes to marriage.
Strong willpower can lead you to better outcomes than succumbing to pressure.
Marriage is not a race; take the time to contemplate what you truly want.
Avoid running away from social events due to pressure; face them with confidence.
Don't let the pressure of marriage distract you from other important life goals.
Live your life fully, and everything will fall into place as it should.
Remember that marriage and divorce are both expensive; avoid the latter by not rushing into the former.
Transcripts
hello and welcome to today's episode of
real talk with da podcast my name is
Adida Emmanuel you know me and I know
you always real so today's topic I'm not
going to take too long it's just going
to be talking about what are the things
you shouldn't do when you're pressured
to
marry I repeat what are those things you
shouldn't do while pressure to marry so
marriage is expensive right and so is
divorce so who would want to go through
that route I mean if you get married why
would you want to divorce so my point is
why would you want to make
pressure allow you to get married so
that's why today's topic is very
important call your friends that are
matur single call anybody that you think
needs to hear this and send it to them
and click like
so the first reason why you should never
C for pressure is because it is about
you it is your life it has to do with
you and you alone because when the music
fits you're going to have to dance to
the tune this thing about marriage is so
funny that all the paparazi actually
doesn't really end because if you have a
good marriage right but what if
something now happens because you C to
pressure and then you marry the wrong
person that day is a day that is for
everybody right but after that day the
Beauty and the very funny thing about
that night is that you guys are alone
and then everybody goes to their houses
and then they have moved on and they
have forgotten what they put you through
so there's no reason whatsoever for
anybody to be pressured or to fall for
the pressure because you can not
actually dictate what people do to you
but you can actually dictate how you
react to it so that's why I'm saying
never ever allow them or people yeah we
know that some of them have good
intention and stuff like that and then
they start but even in their good
intentions they talk about the
biological clock they talk about you
want to die lonely and stuff like that
these things are pressure that nobody
needs because the truth is everybody has
something that is that is bothering them
but it's just different
so why do we have to keep putting
pressure on ourselves or putting
pressure on people or allowing them to
put pressure on you because that's part
of your life you have not checked it or
take the take the um take the button so
that's one thing you should never do
remember a marriage can never happen
unless both partners are convinced right
so if you're not convinced and then they
pressurize you to marry the person
there's a problem and with women we
always have instincts but we just
somehow just don't even you know
recognize our Instinct if your instinct
probably tells you it's not okay then
it's really not okay it's really not
okay and with the guy too yeah I mean
you should also be careful because this
pressure it goes both ways now have your
own plan right decide what is best for
you you as in you when I say you I mean
why
you whatever it is that you want to do
whether you want to further your
education whether you want to look for a
better job whether you want to have
Financial stability concentrate on your
own plan and do not allow pressure to
make you deviate from him from it
distractions is what you really don't
need the next thing you want to do is
you want to communicate with friends and
family that are putting you under
pressure thank you is I know you love me
but you see can we focus on other things
there's no need to run away from parties
or run away from events of your cousin
that is getting married or your K you
know there's no need be yourself be in
your world be happy for yourself and
love yourself that's the most important
thing it could come out as okay she's
being you know
opinionated and stuff like that whatever
anybody can see anything but it is about
you and about the fact that it is what
you want you you of course you have an
ideal thing that you want and so you
will not allow anybody to put you under
pressure because at the end of the
day right I'm saying in English at the
end of the day you will carry your load
by yourself be confident if you have
decided that it's not yet time then
leave it that way and stick to it
because when you Buckle Under Pressure
it will take you nowhere a strong
willpower will definitely take you
somewhere then always pause and
contemplate marriage is not something
that you should rush into I said it
earlier when the day is done you just
sit down and think about what you want
from life you don't want to be pressured
you pressure can make you get into the
wrong marriage and that is exactly what
we're trying to avoid you see if a lot
of people have not been pressured to get
married probably would have fewer
divorces yeah because at the end of the
day when people get into married then
you start hearing something like I
didn't know you know I was put under
pressure and stuff like that hello never
ever allow pressure to make you get Mar
so I'm saying the things you should
never do is never ever run away from
parties run away from Friends run away
from people that are organizing parties
because okay because you're single no
face it Ed on and let them know what you
want never lose your focus as for the
disturbing you for marriage and then
because of that you leave other parts of
your life right other part of your life
that is supposed to be supposed to be
working on other part of your life like
maybe studying you know some people
actually fixate themselves on this
marriage so much so that once they
finish school they don't want to do
anything else all they want to do is now
searching and then they keep searching
going from one Church Hotel Club I don't
know different places just to find a man
then they now make it a missionary
case right you're supposed to live your
life everything will fall in place do
you believe it because everything works
together for good to them that love God
never ever allow pressure to get a hold
of you so much so you get into the wrong
marriage remember marriage is expensive
so is divorce that's where we stop today
for to see you again next episode my
name remains ATA like I said earlier on
and I'm just here minding my father's
business take care and bye for now
[Music]
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