DrayYoutube584 Rants Episode 22: Crushes

Summary

In this video, Dr. 2584 discusses the complexities of having a crush, particularly from the perspective of someone on the autism spectrum. He shares his personal experiences with two crushes, highlighting the emotional rollercoaster, including feelings of nervousness, anxiety, and the pressure to confess. He also touches on the challenges of dealing with the crush's changing appearances and the fear of saying the wrong thing. Dr. 2584 concludes with advice to take it easy and give it time, viewing the experience as a part of personal growth.

Takeaways

• 👨‍🎓 The video is a personal reflection by Dr. 2584, who discusses the challenges of having a crush, particularly as a teenager and someone on the autism spectrum.
• 💔 Dr. 2584 differentiates between a minor crush experienced in his sophomore year and a major crush he had more recently, indicating the intensity of emotions can vary.
• 🤔 He expresses initial optimism about having a crush, suggesting it might be easy, but later acknowledges the emotional turmoil it can cause.
• 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Dr. 2584 sought support from family, a therapist, and friends, highlighting the importance of social support in navigating the complexities of a crush.
• 😓 Feelings of nervousness and anxiety are common when considering confessing feelings to a crush, which Dr. 2584 personally experienced.
• 😔 He mentions the fear of saying the wrong thing and potentially pushing the crush away, a common concern among those with crushes.
• 👸 Dr. 2584 notes the allure of physical appearance, but also the deeper attraction to the crush's kindness, reflecting on the multifaceted nature of attraction.
• 👗 The unpredictability of a crush's appearance can add to the emotional stress, as it can fluctuate the intensity of feelings.
• 🤯 Overthinking interactions and misinterpreting signals can lead to unnecessary distress, as Dr. 2584 experienced when he thought his crush might be interested in someone else.
• 🕊️ The realization that a crush might only see him as a friend helped Dr. 2584 to calm down and reduced his emotional attachment.
• 🔄 The process of trying to overcome feelings for a crush can be hindered by unexpected events or thoughts related to the crush, as Dr. 2584 found out.

Q & A

What is the main topic of Dr. 2584's rant video?

The main topic of Dr. 2584's rant video is the experience of having a crush on someone, particularly the challenges and emotions that come with it.

Why does Dr. 2584 feel that having a crush is not easy?

Dr. 2584 feels that having a crush is not easy because it can be psychologically challenging, especially for someone on the autism spectrum like himself, and it involves a mix of emotions and pressures.

How does Dr. 2584 describe his first crush compared to his second?

Dr. 2584 describes his first crush as a minor one where he was just charmed by the girl's presence, while his second crush was a major one that caused him more difficulty and emotional turmoil.

What was the key difference Dr. 2584 found between his first and second crush?

The key difference was the intensity of the feelings; his first crush was minor and less troubling, while his second crush was major and caused him significant emotional distress.

What did Dr. 2584's family tell him to help him cope with his feelings for his crush?

Dr. 2584's family explained to him that the issues he was worrying about were not as problematic as he thought, which helped him to some extent.

Why did Dr. 2584 feel pressured to confess his feelings to his crush?

Dr. 2584 felt pressured to confess his feelings because of overwhelming emotions and advice from his parents, which led him to plan a confession after winter break.

How did Dr. 2584's perception of his crush's appearance affect his feelings?

Dr. 2584 found his crush more attractive on certain days due to factors like makeup, hairstyle, and clothing, which made his feelings fluctuate and added to his emotional stress.

What common stressor did Dr. 2584 experience related to his crush?

Dr. 2584 experienced the stressor of feeling like he said the wrong thing to his crush, which led him to worry that he might have turned her away.

How did Dr. 2584's stepdad, John, help him deal with his feelings of having said the wrong thing to his crush?

John helped Dr. 2584 by explaining that he shouldn't assume negative thoughts about what his crush might be thinking, which is a common tendency when one is emotionally invested.

What was one of the hardest realizations for Dr. 2584 during his crush experience?

One of the hardest realizations for Dr. 2584 was that his crush might have just seen him as a friend, and he might have been too late to confess his feelings.

What advice does Dr. 2584 give to someone who is crushing on someone they don't know well?

Dr. 2584 advises taking it easy and giving it some time, as going through hard times is a part of the growing process.

Outlines

00:00

💔 The Struggles of a Teenage Crush

Dr. 2584 begins by expressing his long absence from ranting and introduces the topic of crushes, a common teenage experience. He shares his personal journey of having a crush, particularly highlighting the challenges faced due to being on the autism spectrum. He differentiates between a minor crush he had in his sophomore year and a more intense one he experienced recently. Dr. 2584 discusses the initial charm and subsequent complications, including feelings of incompatibility and the emotional turmoil of confessing feelings. He also mentions seeking advice from family and friends, and the pressure to confess his feelings, which led to nervousness and anxiety.

05:00

🤔 Overcoming the Emotional Rollercoaster of a Crush

In the second paragraph, Dr. 2584 delves deeper into the emotional challenges of having a crush, such as the fear of saying the wrong thing and the perception of being pushy. He recounts an incident where he felt he pressured his crush too much and the subsequent regret. His stepdad, John, advises against overthinking and putting thoughts into others' heads. Dr. 2584 also describes the difficulty of seeing his crush with someone else, which led to distress and the realization that she might just see him as a friend. He shares his experience of fluctuating feelings and the moments that hindered his progress in moving on. He concludes by offering advice to others in similar situations, emphasizing the importance of taking it easy and giving time to process emotions, viewing the experience as a part of personal growth.

Keywords

💡Crush

A 'crush' refers to a strong but temporary infatuation or admiration for someone, typically of the opposite gender. In the video, the speaker describes their personal experiences with having a crush, highlighting the emotional challenges and the learning process that comes with it. The term is central to the video's theme as it sets the context for discussing the complexities of adolescent emotions.

💡Autism Spectrum

The 'autism spectrum' encompasses a range of conditions characterized by challenges with social skills, repetitive behaviors, speech and nonverbal communication. The speaker mentions being on the autism spectrum, which likely intensified their experience of having a crush, making it more difficult for them to navigate the associated emotions and social interactions.

💡Incompatible

To be 'incompatible' means not being able to exist together harmoniously or agreeably. The speaker felt a sense of incompatibility with their crush due to a perceived difference between them, which caused them distress. This concept is used to illustrate the internal conflict and the emotional turmoil that can arise from unrequited feelings.

💡Confessing feelings

In the context of the video, 'confessing feelings' refers to openly expressing one's emotions towards another person, particularly in romantic terms. The speaker discusses the pressure and anxiety they felt leading up to confessing their crush, which is a common theme in narratives about romantic interests.

💡Overwhelming

Feeling 'overwhelming' describes a situation where emotions or tasks are so intense that they are difficult to cope with or manage. The speaker uses this term to describe the intensity of their feelings for their crush, which at times became too much to handle, leading to emotional distress.

💡Attractive

Being 'attractive' generally means having a quality or feature that appeals to others, often in a physical or aesthetic sense. The speaker found their crush attractive both in appearance and in character, with the video highlighting the complexity of attraction that goes beyond physical beauty.

💡Pressure

In the video, 'pressure' refers to the stress or strain one feels when faced with expectations or obligations, particularly in the context of expressing romantic feelings. The speaker felt pressured to confess their feelings, which is a common experience for those with crushes and reflects the societal and personal expectations around romantic confessions.

💡Overthinking

To 'overthink' is to think excessively or reflect too deeply on a matter, often leading to increased anxiety or confusion. The speaker mentions overthinking a situation where they believed their crush might be interested in someone else, which led to unnecessary distress and illustrates the common tendency to overanalyze in romantic contexts.

💡Regret

Feeling 'regret' involves experiencing sadness or disappointment over something that has happened, often due to one's own actions or inactions. The speaker talks about regretting pressuring their crush, which is a reflection of the emotional growth and self-awareness that can come from reflecting on past actions in the context of a crush.

💡Learning experience

A 'learning experience' is a situation that provides valuable insights or lessons, often through challenges or mistakes. The speaker concludes by framing their experience with a crush as a learning experience, suggesting that such emotional trials can lead to personal growth and better handling of similar situations in the future.

💡Growing process

The 'growing process' refers to the journey of personal development and maturation, which often involves overcoming obstacles and learning from experiences. The video uses this term to emphasize that dealing with the challenges of a crush is part of the broader process of emotional and social development.

Highlights

The video discusses the challenges of having a crush, particularly for teenagers and those on the autism spectrum.

The speaker shares personal experiences with crushes, highlighting the emotional complexities involved.

A comparison is made between a minor crush experienced in the past and a more intense one in the present.

The video addresses the fear of things not working out with a crush and feelings of incompatibility.

The importance of talking to family and friends for support during times of emotional distress is emphasized.

The pressure to confess feelings to a crush and the anxiety that comes with it is explored.

The speaker describes the physical attraction to their crush and how it affected their emotions.

The unpredictability of a crush's appearance and its impact on the speaker's feelings is discussed.

The fear of saying the wrong thing and potentially pushing the crush away is a common theme.

The video touches on the idea of perceiving the crush as a thing, rather than a person.

The experience of feeling like it's too late to confess feelings to a crush is shared.

The video describes the emotional setback of thinking the crush might have liked the speaker first.

The speaker talks about the difficulty of overcoming feelings for a crush when new triggers arise.

The conclusion emphasizes the psychological challenges of having a crush and the learning experience it provides.

Advice is given to take it easy and give time when dealing with a crush.

The video ends with a note on the importance of going through hard times as part of personal growth.

Transcripts

[Music]

hi guys this is Dr

2584 it's been a while since I've done a

rant and this time I'm going to be

talking about something

real something that a lot of teenagers

have struggled with at some point or

another is the feeling of really liking

someone of the opposite gender

I'm pretty sure everyone knows this but

that's what a crush

is although it's technically meant to be

a positive thing you realize that it's

not particularly easy when you

experience it yourself for the first

time I've experienced it myself this

year and it was difficult for me the

fact that I'm on the autism spectrum

probably made it even

harder this was technically the second

Crush that I've had in my life the first

one was towards the end of my sophomore

year

but here's the key difference the first

one that I had almost 2 years ago was a

minor crush the second one which I've

had this year was a major Crush so I

didn't have a lot of trouble with the

first one I was just Charmed by her

presence and I smiled when I talked to

her I thought maybe having those

feelings for a girl were just a

relatively easy thing for me but that

was until I experienced a true crush

this year my feelings with this one are

diminishing over time and I'm doing

better better now but some of the

feelings I have experienced from it are

similar to what many people who have had

a crush on someone have

experienced I'm going to go over some of

the feelings that I've had in this video

and compare it to what other people

commonly

feel I started having strong feelings 3

months ago for a girl that goes to my

school the first thing that I struggled

with that some people may be able to

relate is thinking that things won't

work out were you and your

crush we were friendly acquaintances

with each other so we gave greetings and

talked briefly to each other but

eventually I found out there was

something between us that was different

and it made me feel like we were

incompatible I'm going to keep what it

is to myself because I don't want to go

into too much detail but I was sad to

find out about it I understand that some

people who are crushing run into the

same

issue I talked to my family and they

explained to me that it wasn't as much

of a problem as I thought it was this

brings me to the point that I have

talked to my parents my therapist and

some of my friends throughout the course

of the time I was having these

[Music]

feelings the second point I'd like to

mention is the feeling of being

pressured into confessing your feelings

to your crush last Christmas Eve I was

talking to my parents about how my

feelings were overwhelming me and they

gave me confidence to confess my

feelings to her so I planned on doing

that one once we got back from winter

break the problem was that I felt

nervous and anxious throughout the break

it was nerve-wracking to think about how

it could range from going extremely well

to going extremely

badly I eventually talked to my mom and

we made an agreement that I should give

it more time and I felt calmer after

that but in general like many people who

have a crush I noticed that when I

wanted to say something to mine I got

nervous at times and put too much

pressure on myself and it was hard for

me when I failed to say something that I

wanted to say to

[Music]

her if you have a crush on someone you

probably think they're very beautiful or

handsome same goes for my case I started

having my feelings for this girl because

I thought she was beautiful and don't

get me wrong I also looked into her

heart and found her kindness to be

attractive as well thinking about her

appearance once I started feeling that

way was too much for me this brings me

to a point of what was hard for me in

school one way that girls who are

crushing on a boy have it a little bit

easier is that they're aren't as many

different looks that you're going to see

on a boy throughout the different days

that you see

them but with girls they're less

predictable on what they're going to

look like for the day in other words

some days they'll look prettier this

goes into three different

factors on certain days they might put

makeup on they might do their hair a

certain way or they might wear a certain

article of clothing that made things

tougher for me because I couldn't just

get used to the same look every day with

this girl I found her more attractive on

certain days than others due to all

three of the factors I just discussed

and I've gotten overwhelmed by this

throughout the time I was having these

feelings next up I'd like to mention

another common stressor which is feeling

you said the wrong thing to your crush

often times causing you to think that

you turned him or her away from you

I experienced that this year when I felt

like I was pressuring my crush into

doing something too many times I ended

up regretting it and I was worried that

she was looking at me as being pushy

with her and that she looked at me as

being someone who didn't know how to

properly

communicate my stepdad John tried to

help me with this by explaining to me

that I shouldn't put thoughts into

people's heads but it's easy for one to

do that with their Crush because you

want to give them a good impression of

yourself

[Music]

another hard thing that I know is common

between people who like someone is

feeling like they're Crush as a thing

with someone who is the opposite gender

that they are and yes I've experienced

that myself and it was rough this one

day I got that impression when I

witnessed it at school I get now that

they were likely just friends but I was

overthinking that they might have been

flirting with each other I was upset and

I need a lot of have helped to feel

better one of the hardest things about

it was the thought that she might have

liked me first but I was just too late

to making that

confession about my

feelings I spent the day feeling

distressed because of that thought I

eventually realized that she probably

just liked me as a friend this whole

time which helped me to feel

calmer the one good thing that came out

of that whole situation was that it

cooled down that Soul fire that I had

for

her

lastly have you ever felt like you were

finally overcoming the feelings you were

having for your crush but something came

up with him or her that hindered your

progress that's what happened to me

before there have been a few occasions

throughout this time period where I was

relieved because I thought my feelings

for my crush were dying out and then

something happened that I felt sent me

back in the wrong direction causing me

to feel

discouraged some of my personal examples

of this include thinking in new

Troublesome thought related to her

seeing her in an unexpected place and

something unrelated showing up that

stressed me out could any of you ever

have related to that so there were a few

other things that made the feelings I

was having hard throughout the time I

was having these feelings for my crush

but I'm going to leave it at that in

conclusion having a crush on someone

isn't all rainbows and flowers it can be

a psychologically challenging

experience but I can see what I went

through as also being a learning

experience the next time I feel this way

about a girl I should at least do better

with it than I did this

time and that can apply to anyone who

went through the same thing going

through hard times in general is a part

of the growing process here's some

advice for someone who's crushing on a

boy or a girl who they don't even know

much about just take it easy and give it

some

time this rant video wasn't necessarily

an actual rant in the same way my other

ones were but I still wanted to add

something to that series since I haven't

posted one in 6

months bye guys I hope you enjoyed this

[Music]

video

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