Dealing With A Bitchy & Disrespectful Girlfriend

Develop Attraction
16 Jul 201607:37

Summary

TLDRIn this video, Chris Carmel addresses the issue of dealing with a disrespectful and challenging girlfriend, a common problem many men face. He explains the reasons behind women's testing behavior and the higher rates of mental health issues in women, which can contribute to their actions. Carmel emphasizes the importance of gaining respect from a girlfriend to prevent such behavior and shares a personal story to illustrate how to handle it. He introduces a technique called 'progressive increased punishment' to correct disrespectful behavior, suggesting that standing firm can lead to change or the realization that a new relationship may be necessary.

Takeaways

  • 😔 Dealing with a disrespectful girlfriend can be very frustrating and requires the right approach to maintain a healthy relationship.
  • đŸ€” Women may test men to see if they are strong, and failing these tests can lead to increased disrespect and 'bitchiness'.
  • 🧐 A lack of respect from a girlfriend can lead to various issues, including flaking on dates, trying to make the partner jealous, and holding out on intimacy.
  • 📊 Women have a higher rate of mental illness, which can contribute to emotional instability and disrespectful behavior, according to a University of Oxford study.
  • 💡 It's important to understand the reasons behind disrespectful behavior but ultimately knowing how to deal with it is crucial.
  • 🌟 Building respect is key; a girlfriend who respects her partner is less likely to be disrespectful.
  • 📾 A client's experience highlighted the issue of a girlfriend sending disrespectful pictures to provoke jealousy, which can be upsetting.
  • 😡 In response to disrespectful actions, staying calm and not immediately reacting with anger can be an effective strategy.
  • đŸš« Using 'progressive increased punishment' as a technique can help regain control by incrementally increasing the time apart if disrespectful behavior continues.
  • 🔄 Ignoring attempts to justify disrespectful behavior and maintaining a stance can lead to a change in the girlfriend's attitude.
  • 🔄 If the girlfriend does not change her behavior, it might be time to consider finding a new partner.

Q & A

  • What is the main issue discussed in the video by Chris Carmel?

    -The main issue discussed in the video is how to deal with a disrespectful and difficult girlfriend.

  • Why do some women act disrespectful towards their partners according to the video?

    -The video suggests that women may act disrespectful because they are testing their partners to see if they are strong, and also because they may have a higher rate of mental illness, leading to difficulties in controlling their emotions.

  • What is the importance of a woman respecting her partner in a relationship?

    -Respect is crucial as it reduces the likelihood of her being disrespectful or difficult, and it indicates that she sees her partner as a high-value individual.

  • What was the situation with Chris's client who was dealing with his girlfriend's disrespectful behavior?

    -The client's girlfriend was trying to make him jealous by sending pictures of herself with other men, and she was also being snappy, angry, and flaky, which was causing him distress.

  • How did Chris handle a similar situation when his girlfriend sent him a picture with another man?

    -Chris responded with a message that showed he was not impressed or jealous, and then ignored her for a couple of days, which led her to stop such behavior.

  • What is the technique Chris developed to deal with a disrespectful girlfriend?

    -The technique is called 'progressive increased punishment,' where the partner is given a period of time to correct their behavior, increasing with each offense until they change or the relationship ends.

  • What should a person do if their girlfriend sends a picture with another man to make them jealous?

    -They should respond in a way that shows they are not affected and then ignore the girlfriend for a few days to demonstrate they are not impressed by such tactics.

  • How does the 'progressive increased punishment' technique work in practice?

    -It starts with the partner not seeing the girlfriend for a week, and with each repeat of the disrespectful behavior, the duration increases, eventually leading to the girlfriend correcting her behavior or the relationship ending.

  • What is the outcome Chris expects from using the 'progressive increased punishment' technique?

    -The expected outcome is that the girlfriend will realize the seriousness of her behavior and correct it, or if she doesn't, the partner will have a clear indication that they should consider ending the relationship.

  • How can viewers get in touch with Chris for further advice or to download his guide?

    -Viewers can book an email or Skype consultation with Chris through his website or download his guide, which is also available on his site.

Outlines

00:00

đŸ˜€ Dealing with Disrespectful Behavior in Relationships

Chris Carmel discusses the issue of dealing with a disrespectful and difficult girlfriend, a common problem many men face. He emphasizes the importance of handling such behavior correctly to avoid long-term frustration. Chris explains that women often test men's strength and if they fail, the woman may escalate her disrespectful actions. He also mentions that women have a higher rate of mental illness, which can contribute to emotional instability in relationships. The key is to gain respect from the girlfriend, as respect can prevent such behavior. Chris shares a personal experience and a client's story to illustrate how to respond to disrespectful actions, suggesting a non-reactive and assertive approach.

05:01

đŸ›Ąïž Implementing Progressive Increased Punishment for Disrespectful Behavior

The second paragraph delves into a strategy called 'progressive increased punishment' to address a girlfriend's disrespectful behavior. This technique involves setting a time-out period that increases with each offense, demonstrating the seriousness of the behavior and the consequences of not correcting it. Chris advises that this method can lead to a change in the girlfriend's attitude, as it shows the man's determination and value. He also offers resources for those facing similar issues, such as email or Skype consultations and a downloadable guide, to help them navigate through these relationship challenges.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Disrespectful

Disrespectful refers to a lack of consideration or courtesy towards others, often manifesting as rude or dismissive behavior. In the video, the term is used to describe a girlfriend's attitude towards her partner, indicating that she may act in ways that are inconsiderate or belittling, such as flaking on dates or speaking without regard for his feelings.

💡Bitchiness

Bitchiness is a colloquial term often used to describe a woman who is perceived as being excessively demanding, irritable, or unkind. In the context of the video, it is suggested that a girlfriend's 'bitchiness' can escalate if her partner fails to assert himself or set boundaries, leading to a more challenging and potentially toxic relationship dynamic.

💡Mental Illness

Mental illness encompasses a wide range of conditions that affect a person's mood, thinking, and behavior. The video mentions that women have a higher rate of mental illness compared to men, which may contribute to emotional instability and erratic behavior in relationships. It's important to note that while the video uses this as a potential explanation for certain behaviors, it does not excuse disrespectful actions.

💡Respect

Respect is the regard for the feelings, wishes, rights, or traditions of others. The video emphasizes the importance of respect in a relationship, suggesting that a girlfriend who respects her partner is less likely to engage in disrespectful behavior. Respect is portrayed as a cornerstone for a healthy and balanced relationship.

💡Testing

In the context of relationships, 'testing' refers to the act of gauging a partner's reactions or responses to certain behaviors to determine their strength or resolve. The video script discusses how women may test men to see if they are strong, and if the man fails the test, the woman may perceive him as weak and act more disrespectfully in the future.

💡Control

Control in this video refers to the ability of an individual to influence or manage the behavior of their partner. It is suggested that if a man does not demonstrate control in the face of disrespectful behavior, his girlfriend may lose attraction and escalate her negative actions, potentially leading to the end of the relationship.

💡Escalation

Escalation is the act of increasing in intensity or severity. The video describes how a girlfriend's disrespectful behavior may escalate if her partner does not effectively address it, leading to more significant issues within the relationship.

💡High-Value Man

A 'high-value man' in the video is described as someone who is respected and seen as valuable by his partner. The script suggests that if a girlfriend perceives her partner as a high-value man, she is less likely to act disrespectfully towards him, indicating that self-worth and perceived value play a significant role in relationship dynamics.

💡Progressive Increased Punishment

This term refers to a technique mentioned in the video for dealing with disrespectful behavior in a relationship. It involves incrementally increasing the consequences or 'punishments' for disrespectful actions, such as taking more extended periods of time away from the partner, until the behavior is corrected. This approach is presented as a way to regain control and encourage change in the partner's behavior.

💡Consultation

Consultation in this context refers to seeking professional advice or guidance, such as booking an email or Skype consultation with the video's speaker. The script suggests that individuals facing relationship issues may benefit from seeking such consultations to address their problems more effectively.

Highlights

Chris Carmel discusses strategies for dealing with a disrespectful girlfriend.

The importance of understanding how to respond to a girlfriend's disrespectful behavior.

The frustration of dealing with a girlfriend who is unresponsive or manipulative.

The idea that women test men to see if they are strong and capable of standing up for themselves.

The escalation of disrespectful behavior if a man fails to assert himself.

The higher rate of mental illness among women and its potential impact on relationships.

The need to maintain control and not show anger when dealing with a disrespectful girlfriend.

The technique of responding to disrespectful behavior with a calm and assertive approach.

A personal example of how Chris handled a girlfriend's attempt to make him jealous.

The concept of 'progressive increased punishment' as a strategy for dealing with disrespectful behavior.

The effectiveness of ignoring a girlfriend for a period to show disapproval of her behavior.

The importance of being consistent and following through with consequences for disrespectful actions.

The potential for a girlfriend to change her behavior after realizing the seriousness of her partner's stance.

The option for men to seek professional advice through email or Skype consultations.

The availability of a guide to help with difficult situations in a relationship.

Encouragement for viewers to get in touch with any questions about their relationships.

Transcripts

play00:00

hi I'm Chris Carmel and in this video

play00:02

I'd like to talk about how to deal with

play00:05

a [ __ ] and disrespectful girlfriend

play00:07

something I think that most guys here

play00:09

have dealt with at some point in the

play00:11

life I know if you're dating a girl

play00:13

there's a very good chance that at some

play00:15

point she will be [ __ ] towards you and

play00:16

you have to know how to deal with this

play00:18

the right way because it can be very

play00:19

very frustrating when you have a

play00:21

girlfriend and she acts in a [ __ ] way

play00:23

she flakes on you she starts trying to

play00:26

make you jealous with other guys or she

play00:29

just cancels at the last minute she

play00:30

holds out on sex and she tries to hold

play00:33

things against you and she talks to you

play00:35

with a lack of respect and it's very

play00:37

frustrating I know I've dealt with it

play00:39

myself in my own relationships and I

play00:41

have my friends and my own clients who

play00:43

dealt with this exact same problem so I

play00:45

know what it's like and I know you have

play00:47

to be able to deal with this the right

play00:49

way if you don't deal with it the right

play00:50

way it's going to be very tough in the

play00:52

long run so why are women getting more

play00:56

and more [ __ ] these days and what are

play00:58

the reasons behind this well one reason

play01:00

is that women like to test men and they

play01:03

like to test the guy and see if he's

play01:04

strong and if you fail the test the

play01:06

first time it might be a very small

play01:08

thing your girlfriend will think that

play01:11

she can act in a more [ __ ] way the

play01:12

next time so she will increase her test

play01:14

she'll be more difficult and the

play01:17

bitchiness will just escalate and

play01:19

escalate until she realizes that you

play01:20

have no control over her you don't know

play01:22

how to put your foot down and you don't

play01:24

know how to be a strong man and then she

play01:26

will eventually leave you because she

play01:28

will have lost all attraction for you

play01:30

another reason women aggghhhhh [ __ ] is

play01:33

because they have a high rate of mental

play01:36

illness and I don't say that to look

play01:38

down on women is a simple fact that

play01:40

women have a 40% higher rate of mental

play01:43

illness than men the University of

play01:46

Oxford the study on this and they found

play01:48

that women have much higher rate of

play01:50

anxiety and depression so don't be

play01:52

surprised if she gets angry and she

play01:55

snaps at you and she acts in a [ __ ]

play01:57

way because she can't control her

play01:59

feelings the same way that men can it's

play02:01

not an excuse it's just the reality is

play02:03

that women are finding it much more

play02:06

difficult to control their emotions but

play02:08

you still have to know how to put her in

play02:09

a place because if you don't know how to

play02:10

do

play02:11

then she's just going to escalate and

play02:12

become more difficult so again it

play02:16

doesn't really matter why she's [ __ ]

play02:18

you have to know how to deal with it the

play02:19

right way if you know how to deal with

play02:21

her [ __ ] behavior then it's not such a

play02:23

big problem you can neutralize it and

play02:26

getting your girlfriend to respect you

play02:29

is the number one thing if she respects

play02:32

you if she thinks that you're a high

play02:33

value man as well then she is much less

play02:37

likely to be [ __ ] and disrespectful

play02:39

towards you you would never see a girl

play02:41

that respects a man a lot being very

play02:43

[ __ ] towards him it just doesn't

play02:45

really happen but if she doesn't respect

play02:47

the guy she will flake on you she'll try

play02:49

to make you jealous

play02:50

she will cause you all kinds of problems

play02:52

so I recently had a conversation with a

play02:55

client of mine who was going through

play02:56

this exact same problem

play02:58

my client was facing a girlfriend who

play03:01

was trying to make him jealous she was

play03:02

sending pictures of her with other guys

play03:04

that of course this was very upsetting

play03:07

and when he questioned her about this

play03:09

then she just said I was nothing that

play03:10

his friends but of course when she's

play03:12

sending photos of her hugging guys being

play03:15

close to other guys it's not very

play03:17

respectful and it's not very nice of

play03:19

course for the relationship so my client

play03:23

that wanted to know how to deal with

play03:25

this while this guy was a little

play03:27

confused and very frustrated

play03:29

understandably because his girlfriend

play03:31

was very close to him and very nice in

play03:33

the beginning and then all of a sudden

play03:34

she started to act this way and she

play03:36

started to be a little bit [ __ ] she'd

play03:38

snap at him more she get angry she'd get

play03:40

defensive

play03:40

she'd flake on him she canceled dates

play03:42

and then she'd start sending these

play03:44

pictures through so it was very

play03:45

upsetting for this guy and I completely

play03:47

understood so he didn't know what to do

play03:49

so what do you do in a situation like

play03:51

this where your girlfriend sends a

play03:52

picture of herself with another guy she

play03:54

cancels on you it's very annoying and

play03:58

it's very important to stay in control

play03:59

at that moment in time don't let it get

play04:01

to you don't show that you're angry at

play04:03

the time for example I had a girlfriend

play04:05

once it was a medical student and she

play04:08

sent me a picture of herself hugging

play04:10

another guy and their heads were

play04:13

together like this and they look very

play04:14

close and happy she sent the picture

play04:17

with no text no information to explain

play04:19

it obviously trying to make me jealous

play04:21

so how would you deal with a situation

play04:22

where you'll go for

play04:24

sends through a picture of herself with

play04:26

another guy or she cancels or she flakes

play04:28

well I had a girlfriend once who was a

play04:29

medical student and she sent a picture

play04:32

with no text and no explanation to me of

play04:35

herself with another guy from the

play04:37

medical school and they're hugging and

play04:39

the heads are close together like this

play04:41

and I looked at the phone and I was like

play04:44

what's this you know it doesn't make

play04:45

sense but okay so I responded and I said

play04:48

hey is that the guy that gave you the

play04:50

STD check and of course five minutes

play04:52

later she tried to blow my phone she's

play04:54

justifying herself trying to explain

play04:55

what happened and I just ignored him for

play04:58

a couple of days after that no more

play05:00

[ __ ] she didn't try to do that again

play05:03

with me because she knew that I wasn't

play05:05

impressed

play05:06

another time I had a girl send me

play05:08

pictures of herself helping a guy move

play05:11

furniture in an apartment and I was like

play05:14

why you sending me pictures of you

play05:16

helping another guy when you've just

play05:18

canceled a date with me and now you've

play05:20

decided to go and help your guy friend

play05:22

move into his apartment so I send your

play05:25

message and I said hey looks like a

play05:28

shitty job but I guess someone's got to

play05:29

do it and of course it showed I'm not

play05:32

impressed and she tried to justify

play05:34

herself and explained why she had to

play05:36

help him again I just ignored her for a

play05:38

couple of days she never tried that

play05:40

again but what do you do when your

play05:41

girlfriend is very very [ __ ] she's

play05:44

very disrespectful she's highly abusive

play05:47

she flakes on you she cancels on days

play05:49

she withhold sex she uses sex as a

play05:53

weapon and she just looks down on you

play05:55

and she has no respect at all you need

play05:57

to get the power back and you need to

play06:00

get her to see you as a high-value man

play06:02

of course this is more easier said than

play06:05

done

play06:05

and a simple one-liner isn't going to

play06:07

work in this situation so what you have

play06:08

to do is use the right strategy I

play06:10

developed this technique called

play06:12

progressive increased punishment and

play06:14

progressive increased punishment is very

play06:16

simple to use it works like this if your

play06:18

girlfriend is [ __ ] she's disrespectful

play06:20

you say to her you've been very [ __ ]

play06:23

in disrespectful I don't want to see you

play06:24

for a week until you can fix your

play06:26

attitude and then after a week if she's

play06:28

still the same you say next time this

play06:30

happens I won't see you for two weeks

play06:32

she does it again you don't see her for

play06:33

two weeks next time she does it don't

play06:36

see her for three weeks

play06:37

next time four weeks five weeks until

play06:40

she eventually realizes that you're just

play06:42

going to pull further and further away

play06:43

until she can actually correct herself

play06:45

and if she can't fix her behavior then

play06:48

you probably better start looking for a

play06:49

new girlfriend

play06:50

but in my experience after one or two

play06:53

weeks where the girlfriend realizes that

play06:56

you're actually gonna stand by your word

play06:57

and you're not going to see her and

play06:58

you're not going to cave in and you

play07:00

actually mean what you say she will come

play07:02

around and she will think twice about

play07:04

being [ __ ] and disrespectful so this

play07:06

is a very good technique to use in this

play07:08

situation so if you have the same

play07:12

problem in your own relationship please

play07:14

don't hesitate to get in touch you can

play07:16

book an emergency email consultation

play07:18

with me or a Skype consultation through

play07:21

my website also if your girlfriend is

play07:23

pulling back and she's being difficult

play07:24

or she's broken up with you and you need

play07:27

a quick fix for this solution then don't

play07:30

forget to download my guide you can get

play07:31

my guide through my website and if you

play07:33

have any questions don't hesitate to get

play07:35

in touch till next time

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