Baby Mama With 11 Kids By 8 Men Proves Why Anti-Baby Mama Culture Is On The Rise | The Coffee Pod
Summary
TLDRThe video discusses the controversial issue of single motherhood, focusing on a woman with 11 children by 8 different fathers. The speaker critiques the celebration of 'baby mama culture' and argues that single motherhood is often glorified despite the significant challenges it presents. The video contrasts this with the struggles single mothers face, highlighting the importance of accountability, structure, and the role of fathers in a child's life. The speaker also addresses the societal narrative that undermines traditional family structures and emphasizes the need for supportive partners in parenting.
Takeaways
- 😀 The video discusses a woman with 11 children by 8 different fathers, who initially found her situation amusing and even danced about it in a video.
- 😔 The woman's attitude towards having multiple children with different fathers is seen as problematic and potentially harmful to the children involved.
- 🤔 The script questions the societal acceptance and even celebration of 'baby mama culture', suggesting that it may not be in the best interest of the children.
- 👍 Some commenters on the original video congratulated the woman, indicating a divide in public opinion on the matter.
- 💬 The woman defended her situation with a light-hearted joke, but the script suggests that there is a deeper conversation to be had about the implications of such choices.
- 👩👧👦 The script highlights the struggles of single motherhood, emphasizing that it is not something to be taken lightly or celebrated without considering the children's well-being.
- 🧐 It points out that single mothers often have to adopt a more masculine role to cope with the responsibilities and pressures of raising children alone.
- 🤝 The video argues that society should encourage women to seek stable, supportive relationships rather than celebrating single motherhood.
- 👨👩👧👦 The importance of a supportive partner in raising children is underscored, suggesting that the absence of a father figure can negatively impact a child's upbringing.
- 🚫 The script criticizes the narrative that fathers are replaceable or unnecessary in a child's life, arguing that this belief is harmful.
- 💔 There is a fear expressed by some single mothers that their children might resent them for the hardships of single parenthood or for showing softer sides to future children in a more stable relationship.
- 📈 The video calls for women to take accountability for their reproductive choices, to think logically about the implications of having children, and to seek a supportive structure for raising them.
Q & A
What is the main topic discussed in the video?
-The video discusses the challenges and societal perceptions surrounding single motherhood, particularly focusing on a woman who has 11 children by eight different fathers. It explores the cultural shifts in how such situations are viewed and the broader implications for single mothers and their children.
How did the woman initially present her situation of having 11 kids by eight different fathers?
-The woman initially presented her situation humorously, making jokes about having multiple baby daddies and even dancing in front of the camera with her children. She seemed to treat the situation lightly, which garnered mixed reactions from viewers.
What does the video suggest about the cultural shift in how single motherhood is perceived?
-The video suggests that there has been a cultural shift, with more people, including single mothers themselves, beginning to criticize and speak out against celebrating single motherhood. It highlights a growing awareness of the challenges and disadvantages that come with raising children without consistent paternal support.
What is the significance of the phrase 'baby mama culture' mentioned in the video?
-The phrase 'baby mama culture' refers to the societal trend where single motherhood, often without the presence of a committed father, is normalized or even celebrated. The video argues that this culture can be harmful, as it overlooks the difficulties and disadvantages faced by children and mothers in such situations.
How does the video address the issue of accountability in single motherhood?
-The video stresses the importance of accountability, particularly for women in controlling their reproductive choices. It argues that women should be more discerning in their relationships and not rely solely on men's promises, emphasizing the need for women to take control of their own futures and avoid setting themselves up for hardship.
What does the video say about the role of fathers in children's lives?
-The video emphasizes the irreplaceable role of fathers in children's lives, arguing that the absence of a supportive father figure can negatively impact both the mother and the children. It challenges the narrative that single mothers can fully compensate for the lack of a father.
How does the video critique the reaction of some viewers who support the woman's situation?
-The video critiques viewers who praised the woman for her situation, suggesting that such support may be misguided and overlooks the long-term consequences for the children. It argues that celebrating single motherhood in this context can perpetuate a harmful cycle.
What alternative perspective does the video offer on single motherhood?
-The video offers a perspective that single motherhood is not something to be celebrated but rather a challenging situation that should be approached with caution and responsibility. It advocates for the importance of stable, two-parent households for the well-being of children.
What concerns are raised about the future relationships and family dynamics of single mothers?
-The video raises concerns about how single mothers might struggle with future relationships and the dynamics of blending families. It highlights fears that children from previous relationships may feel neglected or resentful if their mother forms a new family with a partner.
What is the video's overall message to viewers, particularly single mothers?
-The video's overall message is that single mothers should be cautious about celebrating their situation and should strive for accountability, better decision-making, and raising their standards. It encourages women to focus on building stable, supportive family structures for the sake of their children and themselves.
Outlines
😅 Public Reaction to a Single Mother with Multiple Children by Different Fathers
The paragraph discusses a woman with 11 children by eight different fathers who initially found her situation amusing, even dancing in a video showing each child. The public's reaction was mixed, with some finding humor in her situation and others expressing concern. The woman defended her choices, but the speaker believes societal attitudes are shifting and that such behavior would not be celebrated today. Many single mothers are now speaking out against the 'baby mama' culture, emphasizing the difficulties of raising children alone and urging women to avoid it.
🤔 The Struggles and Fears of Single Motherhood
This paragraph delves into the struggles of single motherhood, highlighting a single mother's fear of her daughter resenting her for the hardships they faced together. It addresses the societal narrative that single mothers are strong and capable, but also the reality that many are struggling. The speaker emphasizes the importance of not settling and raising standards, advocating for women to take control of their reproductive choices and to seek support and value in relationships, rather than perpetuating a cycle of single parenthood.
👨👧👦 The Importance of Fathers and the Myth of Single Parenthood
The final paragraph challenges the idea that single motherhood is not only possible but also desirable. It argues that the presence of a supportive partner is crucial for a mother's ability to focus on her children. The paragraph refutes the notion that fathers are replaceable, citing comments from people who believe they have successfully raised children without a father's involvement. However, it suggests that societal outcomes may not reflect individual perceptions of success, and it encourages a reevaluation of the traditional family structure and the value of co-parenting.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Single motherhood
💡Baby mama culture
💡Feminine energy
💡Masculine energy
💡Accountability
💡Soft girl life
💡Supportive partner
💡Cultural praise
💡Co-parenting
💡Traditional family
Highlights
The speaker discusses a viral video of a woman with 11 children by 8 different fathers, initially treated humorously by the woman.
The woman in the viral video initially joked about her situation, but the speaker notes that if the video were released today, it might receive more criticism for celebrating 'baby mama culture.'
The speaker points out that single mothers themselves are now speaking out against the challenges of raising children without a consistent father figure, highlighting the shift in conversation.
A single mother shares her experience, emphasizing that raising children alone is not a 'flex' and acknowledging the hardships that come with single parenthood.
The speaker notes that there's a growing realization among women that being a single mother is far more difficult and less desirable than being a wife.
A single mother expresses her fear that her daughter might resent her in the future if she has more children with a partner, highlighting the emotional struggles single mothers face.
The speaker acknowledges that single mothers often don't want to admit their struggles, but emphasizes the importance of checking in on them.
The speaker discusses the narrative that single mothers don't need a man, but counters that many are struggling and would benefit from a supportive partner.
Another woman shares her experience, stressing the importance of accountability and planning, and advises women to be cautious about having children without a stable partner.
The speaker commends women who take accountability and learn from their mistakes, emphasizing that the majority often don't want to do the hard work of change.
A video is mentioned where the speaker claims that single parenthood is a 'scam' and was never meant to be the norm for the human race.
The speaker emphasizes that single mothers often collapse under the pressure, and their children suffer as a result, making the case for the importance of having a supportive partner.
The speaker argues that society was never meant to function with single-parent households, and that a supportive partner is crucial for a mother's energy to be directed toward her children.
The speaker highlights that there is a perception among some women that fathers are replaceable in families, a viewpoint that he strongly disagrees with.
In the final comments, the speaker reflects on the importance of traditional family structures and the benefits of raising children with both parents involved.
Transcripts
can't make this up this lady got L kids
a baby daddy did you hear what I just
said L kids eight baby dad do I need to
S it l kid not 11
buty welcome to the coffee po my name is
chisha Zed last year I released a video
about this specific chick 11 kids by
eight different baby daddies and what
I'm not going to do is talk about the
very obvious fact that those children
are a victim of a mother who put them at
disadvantage in life we're not going to
do that we're not going to go into that
conversation what we are going to talk
about is I believe the conversation
surrounding this specific situation is
changing so when she first released the
video she thought her situation was
funny in fact she did a whole dance of
her dancing in front of the camera and
actually showed all of her kids one by
one and was really facius with the way
she presented her whole situation and
when asked questions from viewers about
why she would do this to herself even
worse her children she would respond
jokingly like this why have one baby
daddy you have five why have five when
you can have nine I'll give away a baby
daddy you can have mine this single
mother with 11 children by eight baby
daddies approached this situation like a
lot of chicks do online when they talk
about this situation she thought it was
funny she thought it was a joke that her
children don't have consistent present
fathers in their home not only her a lot
of the comments would congratulate her
like this commenter who says I love you
omg and somebody else here who added why
stop there leave your life matter of
fact sign me up so we've got a guy here
who's ready to be baby daddy number nine
but there were some people who were like
why would you do this and she finally
decided to
respond one thing I'm sick of having to
explain is why I have eight baby daddies
okay so I'm explain this one time for
y'all so it won't be any more questions
okay let me explain this if you have one
and you take away one you have zero but
if you have eight and you take away you
still have
five so as you guys can tell she's still
lightly joking around about this
situation but here's what I think I
believe if she released the exact same
video now a lot of people would call her
out for celebrating baby mama culture
and it's not just people like myself or
people who you may even think would call
this chick out a lot of single mothers
are speaking out and saying listen been
there done it once and I'm deciding not
to do it eight more times I don't care
what any baby mama say having to raise
your kids by yourself is not a flex and
this is coming from a single mother
listen to your sister don't let any baby
mama deceive you into believing that
being a single mother is more convenient
than being a wife you hear me when I was
pregnant with my daughter I went through
the whole pregnancy by myself ain't
nobody going me to no appointments no
baby child no gender reveal when my
water broke I got us to the hospital and
from the hospital and I can go on and on
about my baby dad F my baby dad F my
baby dad but I slept with him so what
kind of woman did that make me you never
hear woman say that I personally never
heard a single mother drink coffee to
this extent which is why I believe
chicks like this woman are doing the
work of god let's keep
listening okay you way too beautiful way
too smart way too intelligent to be
going through something like that so
live your soft girl life ain't nothing
wrong with saying you too good to be a
baby mama you right because us strong
black women not strong because we choose
to be we strong because we have to be
and as we see it's not only black women
the woman who we're talking about right
now is white but I really want to focus
on something that she said she said we
live in a culture where people will
praise somebody for being a single
mother more than they will a wife I just
released a video with the title Tik Tock
hates happily married wives you may
think that's an extreme title but go ask
one of these wives what happens when
they pull something where they're either
cooking for their husband
doing some typee of housework anything
that looks like wife activity right
something that would make a husband
really appreciate his wife they face
backlash from the chicks on Tik Tok who
don't drink coffee they do they don't
like to see it I saw a video of a woman
saying that single mothers are deprived
of a certain type of mothering
experience and as a single mom this is
something that I think about every
single day because I have so many fears
wrapped around this concept I've been on
my own with my daughter for the last 5
years and it took that entire 5 years
for me to figure out that I could
actually keep the ship above water on my
own if I give up my softness being able
to rest in your feminine as a mother is
a privilege the amount of problem
solving logic reason responsibility that
I have on a daily basis doesn't allow me
a privilege of sitting in my softness it
doesn't allow me the privilege of being
in my feminine energy as a mom I have to
lean into my masculinity more I've
learned how to not be hyper masculine
but I've had to lean into my masculinity
more in order to keep my ship going and
then I start thinking about the
possibility of one day getting a husband
and having more children and what my
daughter is going to feel when she
watches me raise other kids in my
softness because I'm going to have a
partner that I get to lean on so I don't
have to live in my masculinity and I
don't have to be hard on them in the
same ways or lean on them in the same
ways that I've had to lean on her
because it's just us too and one of my
biggest fears is that my daughter is
going to resent me if I have more kids
or a husband and give them a love that
she didn't get to have because I had to
be on my own with her so yeah check on
your single mom friends because she's
hurting
mhm she is absolutely struggling and
even if she doesn't want to be the one
to tell you that because she doesn't
want anyone to think that she doesn't
have a grip on what she's got going on
I'm going to tell you for her check on
that girl listen she just spoke the
truth right there there's this narrative
that that a lot of people like to paint
of oh yeah single moms it doesn't matter
fathers they don't matter they can do it
all by themselves but she's telling you
as a single mom that listen the single
women you see who have children and
don't have a father or man to help
support are struggling I'm not somebody
who believes that once you're a single
mother you can't find a man out here who
will find Value in you and you can't
learn to embrace your femininity and
nurturing attributes even though most
men who are childless won't want to
settle down or marry a single mother
there are plenty of men out here who if
they find a woman who gives an exchange
of value that they find beneficial they
will settle down with that person this
is the truth it happens all the time
regardless of what you may believe or
think or the values you may hold there
chicks out here yes single mothers who
eventually start to embrace and focus on
like she said leaning into her feminine
energy it's happening and they get a lot
of [ __ ] from the other women who want
them to pretend like everything's okay
right who want them to pretend like oh
you're just weak you can't do it both I
can do it both I don't need a man it's
not true hey y'all um I was in a live
and it kind of prompt me to make this
video about the discussion and it was
basically why do women celebrate being
baby mamas and not really push to become
WI lives and you know as a baby mama as
they would call it myself um what I had
to learn is we have to take
accountability yes these men can let us
down once we feel like we're in love yes
they can tell us that they're going to
do x y andz and they're going to be
there and we want to believe that
because these are the people we're
giving ourselves to at the end of the
day but we don't really know and we do
not have a certainty nothing is certain
but I know what is certain my ovulation
dates my ovulation CC we have to stop
being reactive to emotion and start
thinking logically you hold the key as a
woman to when you are going to have a
child and this is something I had to
learn I couldn't say oh well he told me
he loved me and I believed him and we
wanted a family I had to start thinking
like okay is this man M marriage
material is this someone I can see
myself sharing a life with because me
just constantly meeting a man or just
being with a man and making babies over
and over again and thinking that you
know things are going to be great and
this and that and we have no structure
it's me setting myself up for
disappointment again shout out to this
chick because what do we usually see
when we see the older women they double
down they don't admit that hey um I wish
I have done things differently and you
women need to get things together and
you younger women should have make the
same mistakes and you should get it
together so what if the majority of
women still choose not to listen the
majority never does what's right the
majority never wants to to do the hard
thing the majority of people never want
to change it's just what it is the
majority of people always do the popular
thing not everybody's going to drink
coffee but for the few who stumble in a
video like this especially from a woman
who's been through it and gone through
it it matters not only is that man
disappointing me but I'm going to have
to live with that decision or raising
that child if he's not present in a
healthy way so I had to learn myself to
take accountability and set the tone
step it up ladies don't
just um go for anything that's out here
don't just oh he loves me I love him a
lot of us come from broken homes and we
just jump at the first sight of someone
wanting to be with us or the idea of
bringing a kid and the baby can love me
unconditionally and I can love it
unconditionally but we are setting
ourselves up in this Society for a bit
of struggle yes you can do it I've done
it but it meant working working working
and co-parenting learning how to
co-parent once relationship is over
which is not always easy so let's take
accountability and learn our ovulation
Cycles which a lot of people in that
live were they were surprised to hear me
say that and take accountability and
they said I made a great Point even one
young lady was like you need to advocate
for this and and I will you know what I
mean because I too had to learn so what
I want us to do as women is stop placing
the blame on where it takes two to lay
down but we know ultimately if we're not
set up properly and with the right stru
structure it could be our detriment it
could be very detrimental to us so let's
just focus on setting the tone stepping
it up raising our standards raising our
morals and not settling for Less period
this next video is titled single
Parenthood is a scam okay can I explain
something now this is really I'm going
to be aggressive because this nobody
wants to hear this because what you want
me to say today is actually being a
single mother is totally possible it
actually isn't you know that it's not it
was never meant to happen for the human
race number one number two single
biggest determiner of whether a mother
is a good mother what do you think it is
whether they have a supportive partner
so the the major argument for good Dads
is actually can the dad be there for the
mom what you see is that if you've got a
a father figure basically who's
supportive to the mother the mother's
energy goes towards the children but the
second that she doesn't have that
supportive energy she collapses and then
the kids get starved so it's and we are
not actually supposed to be living in a
single family household so it's supposed
to be a lot more support towards mom
than just Dad but I'm going with
standard societal structure you are a
victim of a society that was never meant
to work this way you are not meant to
and no children are meant to actually
grow up in a single family home much
less a broken home very well put and you
might be wondering well chisha why do
you care well because at the core of
this discussion and women who disagree
with this what they are saying is that
fathers are
replaceable in homes in
families if you don't believe me check
out some of these comments in response
to the last video we just watched this
woman says yet here we are raising
mentally and emotionally stable
beautiful human beings not because we
wanted to alone but because we had to
the data says otherwise Lizzy doesn't
say that somebody else here added most
wives are still single
mothers so even even if you are present
they will find a way to make sure that
they make you irrelevant to the growth
of that child here's another person who
says single mom for 15 years and my son
is an amazing human being so see the
single tricks hear that video and they
watch videos like this and all they
think is like but my kids amazing you
don't get to determine that Society will
determine that and sometimes those
children really speak up she goes on to
say he's he's an amazing human being and
an amazing boyfriend to his girlfriend
all due to being raised by a loving
mother who devoted everything she was
and had to be her primary and I'm not
saying single mothers shouldn't be there
for their
children that's not what I'm saying I'm
saying at the core of the people who
listen to a message like this and think
nah no I don't agree what you're saying
is that fathers are necessary somebody
else here added facts a traditional
family never gets credit cuz it doesn't
fit the narrative and our final comment
here says I raised three amazing
daughters completely single no
assistance from their dad or anyone
including financially it's not only
possible but it's wonderful there you go
there you go you get to choose though
how you want to live your life and
hopefully you decide to do what's best
listen as always I appreciate you
checking out yet another episode of the
coffee pot till next time peace
[Music]
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