how to speak to f*cking ANYONE
Summary
TLDRThis video script offers practical advice on improving social skills to enhance personal and professional life. It emphasizes the importance of initiating conversations by complimenting, observing, or asking questions, and suggests becoming a 'fisherman' to identify common interests. The script highlights the art of listening and storytelling to captivate the other person, encouraging them to speak about themselves. It also introduces a mindset hack, viewing life as a theater where everyone plays a role, to boost confidence and charisma. For conversing with women, it recommends humor, compliments, flirting, and recognizing disinterest to gracefully end the conversation. The goal is to become a likable conversationalist who can connect with anyone.
Takeaways
- 🗣️ Improve your life by mastering the art of conversation; it can lead to better relationships and opportunities.
- 🤝 Learn to initiate conversations by complimenting, observing, or asking questions, and gauge the other person's interest from their reactions.
- 🎣 Be a 'fisherman' in conversations by seeking common ground and topics to expand upon to keep the dialogue flowing.
- 💬 Prioritize listening over speaking, as people enjoy talking about themselves; this makes them feel special and valued.
- 👂 Use the principle of 'two ears, one mouth' to emphasize the importance of listening more than talking in conversations.
- 📚 Enhance your storytelling skills to make your responses more engaging and entertaining, akin to immersing the listener in a movie.
- 🎭 Adopt a playful mindset, viewing life as a theater where everyone plays a role, to reduce social pressure and enjoy conversations more freely.
- 🎬 Practice storytelling by listening to podcasts and observing great speakers, then apply these techniques in real-life conversations.
- 😄 Incorporate humor, descriptive language, and a captivating tone to make your stories more appealing and memorable.
- 🚫 Be vigilant for signs of disinterest in a conversation and gracefully exit if the other person is not engaged.
- 💖 When talking to women, focus on humor, compliments, and flirting to build rapport and maintain a fun and engaging interaction.
Q & A
What is the primary focus of the video script?
-The primary focus of the video script is to provide advice on how to improve conversation skills, particularly with the goal of making more friends, potentially finding a romantic partner, and becoming more confident in social interactions.
What are the three simple steps suggested for opening a conversation with anyone?
-The three simple steps suggested for opening a conversation are giving a compliment, making an observation, and asking a question, or a combination of these three.
According to the script, what should you do after initiating a conversation to find common points?
-After initiating a conversation, one should act like a fisherman, casting out hooks to find commonalities or topics that can be expanded upon, which helps to keep the conversation going.
Why is it important to let the other person do most of the talking in a conversation?
-Letting the other person do most of the talking is important because people generally enjoy talking about themselves, and by allowing them to do so, they will feel special and have a positive impression of the conversationalist.
What is the second most important principle of good conversation mentioned in the script?
-The second most important principle of good conversation is learning how to tell stories, which can make the conversation more entertaining and engaging for the listener.
How can one improve their storytelling skills according to the script?
-One can improve their storytelling skills by listening to podcasts and videos of great speakers, trying to emulate their style, and then practicing in real-world conversations to see how people react.
What mindset hack is suggested to feel more confident and outgoing in conversations?
-The mindset hack suggested is to view life in public as a form of theater, where everyone is playing a role. This perspective can reduce pressure and allow for a more relaxed and playful approach to conversations.
What are the three pillars of conversation when talking to someone you find attractive, as mentioned in the script?
-The three pillars of conversation when talking to someone you find attractive are humor, flirting, and compliments.
Why is humor important in the initial stages of a conversation with an attractive girl?
-Humor is important in the initial stages of a conversation with an attractive girl because it helps make her feel comfortable and ensures that you are not perceived as a creep.
What should one do if they sense that the person they are talking to is not interested?
-If one senses that the person they are talking to is not interested, they should gracefully acknowledge the situation by saying something like 'It was lovely meeting you, have a great day,' and then walk away without trying to prolong the conversation.
How can pretending that one's life is a movie enhance the quality of conversations?
-Pretending that one's life is a movie can enhance the quality of conversations by encouraging a more playful and entertaining storytelling approach, making the interaction more enjoyable for the listener.
Outlines
🗣️ Mastering Conversational Skills
This paragraph emphasizes the importance of effective communication in improving one's life, including making more money and forming relationships. It suggests that the key to being a good conversationalist is to engage in conversations confidently and to listen actively, allowing others to express themselves. The speaker also highlights the importance of storytelling as a means to captivate the audience and make conversations more enjoyable. Additionally, the paragraph introduces the idea of viewing social interactions as a form of theater, which can help reduce social anxiety and make conversations more playful and engaging.
💬 Conversational Tactics with Humor and Flirting
The second paragraph focuses on the specifics of engaging in conversations with women, building upon the general conversational skills previously discussed. It advises using humor to establish comfort and rapport, offering genuine compliments to express interest, and employing light-hearted flirting to create a playful dynamic. The speaker also stresses the importance of recognizing disinterest and gracefully ending the conversation if the other party is not receptive. The goal is to become a likable and engaging conversationalist who can navigate social interactions with ease and confidence.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Conversation
💡Compliment
💡Observation
💡Question
💡Commonalities
💡Communication
💡Storytelling
💡Confidence
💡Flirting
💡Humor
💡Charisma
💡Outgoing
Highlights
The importance of improving communication skills for personal and professional success.
The impact of effective speaking on making more money, having more friends, and finding a partner.
How to initiate conversations by giving compliments, making observations, or asking questions.
The role of being a 'fisherman' in conversations to find common points and keep the conversation going.
The principle of allowing the other person to do most of the talking to make them feel special.
The significance of having two ears and one mouth in effective communication.
The importance of storytelling in making conversations more engaging and entertaining.
How to tell good stories by using humor, descriptive language, and immersing the listener.
The advice to listen to podcasts and videos of great speakers to improve storytelling skills.
The mindset hack of viewing life as theater to feel more confident and outgoing in conversations.
The concept of treating conversations as a game to reduce pressure and increase enjoyment.
The technique of pretending to be in a movie to add playfulness and entertainment to conversations.
Basic principles for talking to girls, including humor, flirting, and compliments.
The use of humor to make a girl feel comfortable and enjoy the company.
The importance of giving genuine compliments and flirting playfully in conversations with girls.
The need to be vigilant in looking for signs of disinterest and knowing when to end a conversation gracefully.
The final advice to practice the conversational skills discussed to become a likable conversationalist.
Transcripts
getting really good at talking with
other people is the number one thing you
can do to quickly improve your life do
you want to make more money have a ton
of friends and find a 10 on a 10 wife
just learn how to speak well we all know
those guys that can stroll into any room
and immediately strike up conversations
with random people while you may resent
that guy for chatting up your crush
while you just stood in the corner
watching don't worry because by the end
of this video you'll be that guy too and
while this video is not specifically
about talking to girls considering about
98% of you from my last video were dudes
I'm going to take a wild guess and
assume you guys would also like some
specific advice about talking to girls
we'll get to that a bit later but first
you need to understand how to actually
have good conversations in general let's
start with opening a conversation with
anyone I'm going to keep this extremely
simple just walk up and either give them
a compliment make an observation ask a
question or a combination of those three
from here you'll see how receptive they
are to talking and learn whether or not
to keep going and this should be pretty
obvious from their reaction from here I
need you to become a fisherman what I
mean is in those first few lines of
conversation keep an eye on for
commonalities or things you can expand
upon for example if they say they're
from Colorado and you're a skier then
ask them about skiing because if they're
from Colorado they're probably a skier
you send your hook out to the Sea and
wait for it to bite find those common
points this is also how you keep a
conversation going and never run out of
things to say just keep searching for
those points so you can expand on in the
conversation if you find yourself at a
roadblock where nothing really stands
out either ask another relevant question
or backtrack and say something about an
earlier Topic in the conversation now
let's move to the most important
principle of being good at communicating
simply allow the other person to do the
vast majority of the talking think about
it people's favorite thing to talk about
is themselves so if you just let them do
all the talking and make them feel
special that person will walk away from
the conversation thinking not only did
they have a great time talking with you
but that you're also an incredible
conversationalist it's really cheesy but
that's exactly why they say you have two
ears and one mouth for a reason you may
be thinking well conversations are a
two-way street I'm going to have to talk
at some point and you're right that's
why the second most important principle
of good conversation is learning how to
tell stories if the other person asks
you a question try answering it with a
story it's 10 times more entertaining to
listen to if you can tell stories well
it's almost like putting the other
person in a trance think about when you
watch a really good movie and you're
fully immersed in the characters this is
exactly what happens when you learn how
to communicate stories effectively but
how do you actually tell good stories
the best way to explain this is with an
example of good versus storytelling
in the exact same situation so we were
at the door and all of a sudden a guy
comes through the door with a knife in
his hand he goes up to the register and
starts demanding all the cash from the
guy there then out of nowhere another
customer hits the knife out of the
burglar's hand and takes him to the
ground so we're at Target just going
about our day and out of nowhere some
dude bursts through the door big ass
knife in hand and goes right to the
register I'm looking around watching
this happen thinking I'm no paulart Mall
Cop I'm not saving the day here cuz I
don't want to get stabbed then all of a
sudden I see this big dude must have
been a bodybuilder or something like
that rolls up up on this guy basically
karate chops the knife out of his hand
and takes us due to the ground craziest
thing I've ever seen so of course you'd
want to listen to The Second Story
rather than the first one in the Second
Story I implemented humor emphasize my
tone use more descriptive language and
most importantly immerse The Listener in
the story my best advice for learning to
tell good stories is just listening to
podcasts and videos of great speakers
than trying to talk in a similar way to
them then just practice in the real
world and see how people react the more
you do it the better you'll get and
before you know it you're the best
Storyteller you know now the other
principle for having great conversations
is a little mindset hack that will make
you feel more confident charismatic and
outgoing I don't want to get too deep
but understand that life out in public
is all just theater everyone is like an
actor in a movie they get ready in the
morning to look their best for other
people they smile at the neighbors
because it would be rude not to and say
thank you to the Barista at the coffee
shop everyone is just playing a role in
society and when you realize that
everyone's just trying their best to act
normal it takes a lot of pressure off
your shoulders corporate life is theater
dating is theater even friendships are
theater so where am I going with this
well stop trying so hard let the
conversation flow say things
unapologetically exaggerate how you
speak nobody really cares that much and
if you look at everything like a big
game it's like a breath of fresh air
from the monotony of daily life just
have fun with conversations and if
someone doesn't like that then F them
they can go back to their boring lives
without us a great trick for
implementing this playfulness into
conversations is pretending you're in a
movie and a camera crew is filming your
life how would you tell this story if
this was a scene in a major Blockbuster
movie I'm sure you'll make the story
much more entertaining and the other
person will love listening to you now
for the moment all you guys have been
waiting for learning the specifics and
chatting with the ladies I'm not going
to go super deep into this because this
could be an entire video on its own but
I'll run you through some of the basics
in talking to a girl you find attractive
use all the principles I've mentioned so
far as the base of the conversation but
there are three pillars that you need to
focus on these are humor flirting and
compliments starting with humor this is
exactly how to make a girl feel
comfortable around you and enjoy your
company it's 2024 the first 5 minutes of
any conversation with a random girl
consist them testing the waters to
ensure you're not a creep be funny don't
be so serious and sure as hell don't be
creepy next compliments and flirting I'm
going to toss into the same bucket give
one to two genuine compliments to a girl
in the conversation this puts your
intentions right out there in a very
obvious way and the conversation will
get a little bit tense or awkward just
hold your frame and be confident in
yourself then for flirting this is where
you can have fun and playfully push away
in an obvious way it's essentially just
putting clear intentions out there then
slightly retracting it for a playful
banter it's like when you're hang out
with the guys and call one of them an
idiot it's just playful back and forth
chat it keeps things interesting and fun
the other aspect of talking with random
girls is you have to be very Vigilant
and looking for signs that the other
person isn't interested you can be the
top male model in the world and there
will still be girls who just aren't
interested that's life once you
recognize this interest just say well it
was lovely meeting you have a great day
then simply walk away don't be one of
those creepy guys who awkwardly tries to
keep the conversation going or hangs out
next to her after the conversation ends
and honestly to start that's all you
really need humor compliments flirting
and knowing when to bounce everything
else should be filled in by the other
conversational skills that I've already
talked about and that is it gentlemen
now go out and be that guy that everyone
loves having conversations with
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