If You're Feeling Lost...It's Actually GOOD!
Summary
TLDRIn this 'Being Human' podcast episode, Scott St. Marie addresses the feeling of being lost, a common experience in life. He reassures listeners that being lost doesn't signify failure but is a sign of being a seeker, exploring and moving forward. Scott encourages embracing the feeling, using it as a launchpad for growth, and advises taking time to reorient oneself without self-judgment. He invites listeners to join Zoom groups for community support, emphasizing the value of connection and shared experiences in alleviating the sense of being lost.
Takeaways
- 🧭 The feeling of being lost is a common experience that can resonate with many people, reflecting a sense of disorientation and uncertainty about life's direction.
- 🏠 Even when someone has everything they need, they can still feel lost, which is a sign of seeking more than just material possessions.
- 🤔 Feeling lost is not a sign of failure or hopelessness; it can be a catalyst for introspection and personal growth.
- 🚀 Being lost can be a sign of being on a journey, moving forward, and exploring new directions in life.
- 🔍 When lost, it's important to zoom out and gain a broader perspective to understand where you are and where you want to go.
- 🕊️ Patience and stillness can be powerful tools when feeling lost; sometimes solutions emerge without forcing them.
- 🌱 The act of not trying too hard and allowing things to unfold naturally can lead to unexpected growth and direction.
- 🌲 When lost, it's beneficial to ground yourself in your current situation and reorient yourself before making decisions.
- 🛣️ Life is not a straight path; it involves moving, tweaking, and exploring different directions to find one's way.
- 🌟 It's essential to be gentle with oneself and avoid self-criticism when feeling lost, recognizing the value in the journey.
- 🤝 Connecting with others and sharing experiences of feeling lost can alleviate feelings of loneliness and provide comfort.
Q & A
What is the main theme of the 'Being Human' podcast episode?
-The main theme of the episode is dealing with the feeling of being lost and exploring the idea that being lost is not necessarily a negative state but can be a part of the journey of self-discovery and personal growth.
What does the podcast host suggest is a common feeling among people who are lost?
-The host suggests that people who are lost often feel a sense of confusion, disorientation, and paralysis, and they may question their decisions and life direction.
How does the host view the state of being lost in relation to personal growth?
-The host views being lost as an opportunity for personal growth, suggesting that it can be a launch pad for new beginnings and a chance to explore new directions in life.
What does the host recommend doing when feeling lost in a physical sense, like being lost in the woods?
-The host recommends using a compass to get a sense of direction, taking a bird's eye view to understand the surroundings, and grounding oneself in the present situation to figure out the next steps.
What is the host's perspective on the relationship between creativity and feeling lost?
-The host believes that creativity and the feeling of being lost are linked, as creative individuals are often seekers who are exploring new ideas and directions, which can lead to feelings of being lost.
What advice does the host give for dealing with the feeling of being lost in life?
-The host advises taking time to reorient oneself, being patient, and not rushing to make decisions. They also suggest being kind to oneself and viewing the feeling of being lost as a natural part of the journey.
How does the host relate the feeling of being lost to the broader human experience?
-The host relates the feeling of being lost to the human experience by suggesting that it is a universal feeling, especially among creative and sensitive individuals, and is part of the human journey of exploration and discovery.
What does the host suggest as a metaphor for dealing with the feeling of being lost?
-The host uses the metaphor of being an adventurer or explorer on a hero's journey, taking out a map to check one's location and direction, and setting up a base camp as a way to deal with the feeling of being lost.
What is the host's view on the importance of community and connection when feeling lost?
-The host believes that community and connection are important when feeling lost, as they can help reduce feelings of loneliness and stress, and provide a support system for sharing ideas and experiences.
How does the host conclude the podcast episode, and what final advice does he offer?
-The host concludes the episode by thanking the listeners and inviting them to join zoom groups and subscribe to the newsletter for further connection. He advises listeners to take comfort in the feeling of being lost, to rest on their 'launch pad,' and to trust that they will know when to make the next move.
Outlines
🌐 Embracing the Feeling of Being Lost
The podcast begins with the host addressing the feeling of being lost, which he suggests is a common experience in today's culture. He empathizes with the audience, acknowledging the confusion and disorientation that comes with not knowing which direction to take in life. The host, who is also a personal coach, emphasizes that feeling lost is not a sign of failure but rather an indication of being on a journey. He invites listeners to reconsider their perspective on being lost, suggesting that it can be a positive state that allows for exploration and discovery. He also highlights the importance of not rushing to find solutions and instead taking the time to understand one's current situation.
🗺️ Finding Direction in the Digital Age
In this paragraph, the host discusses the modern methods of finding one's way, such as using digital maps on smartphones. He contrasts this with the more traditional approach of using a compass and a physical map, which he finds more satisfying. The host uses the metaphor of zooming out on a map to illustrate the need to take a broader view of one's life when feeling lost. He suggests that before seeking solutions, it's important to pause, reorient oneself, and consider the current circumstances. The host also touches on the idea of allowing time to pass, as solutions may naturally present themselves without forcing action.
🌳 The Adventurer's Journey Through Lostness
The host continues to explore the theme of being lost, likening it to an adventurer's journey. He encourages listeners to see themselves as explorers who are bound to get lost at times. The host advises against self-criticism and emphasizes the importance of being gentle with oneself during these periods. He suggests using the feeling of lostness as an opportunity to reorient and reflect on one's current situation. The host also mentions the value of setting up a 'base camp' in life, taking the time to establish a sense of stability before moving forward.
🌑 Resting in the Darkness of Uncertainty
Here, the host delves into the feeling of being lost as a moment of rest and reflection. He encourages listeners to embrace the feeling of lostness, likening it to a warm blanket that can provide comfort. The host suggests that there is no need to rush to make decisions and that it's okay to take time to understand one's situation. He emphasizes the importance of community and connection, inviting listeners to join Zoom groups and newsletters to share their experiences and find support. The host also acknowledges the loneliness that can accompany feeling lost and encourages listeners to connect with others who are experiencing similar feelings.
🌟 Finding Comfort in the Unknown
In the final paragraph, the host wraps up the podcast by reiterating the positive aspects of feeling lost. He encourages listeners to see this state as a natural part of life's journey and to find comfort in it. The host invites listeners to join him in Zoom groups and subscribe to newsletters for further interaction and support. He also asks for feedback and reviews on platforms like Spotify and iTunes, highlighting the impact that listeners can have on smaller platforms. The host concludes by reminding listeners that feeling lost is temporary and that they will eventually find their way.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Lost
💡Direction
💡Collective
💡Decision-making
💡Gratitude
💡Purpose
💡Explorer
💡Launch Pad
💡Reorient
💡Nature
💡Loneliness
Highlights
The feeling of being lost can resonate with many as it reflects a cultural sense of directionlessness.
Being lost can lead to self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy, despite having material comforts.
The speaker emphasizes that feeling lost is not a sign of failure but rather a part of the human experience.
Being lost is associated with being a seeker, someone who is exploring and discovering.
The speaker suggests that feeling lost is a sign of movement and progress, rather than stagnation.
When lost, the speaker recommends using tools like a compass or map to gain a sense of orientation.
The analogy of being lost in the woods is used to illustrate the importance of understanding one's current position before deciding on a path.
The speaker encourages taking time to reorient oneself and not rushing into decisions when feeling lost.
The concept of 'the art of not trying' is introduced, suggesting that sometimes solutions present themselves naturally without forced effort.
The speaker advises against self-criticism and encourages self-compassion during times of feeling lost.
Being lost is framed as an opportunity for self-exploration and understanding one's true desires and direction.
The speaker shares personal anecdotes of being lost, emphasizing the value of the experience in personal growth.
The idea of setting up a 'base camp' in life is introduced, suggesting that it's okay to pause and settle before moving forward.
The speaker invites listeners to join zoom groups and newsletters for community and support during times of feeling lost.
The importance of community and connection is highlighted as a way to alleviate feelings of loneliness and lostness.
The speaker ends with a reminder that feeling lost is a natural part of the human journey and encourages listeners to embrace it.
A call to action is made for listeners to engage with the podcast by leaving reviews and joining discussions.
Transcripts
hello my friends welcome to the being
human podcast thank you so much for
listening thank you for clicking on
youtube spotify itunes wherever you
listen or watch
now listen
the word lost may have resonated with
you in this title
we seem to be lost as a culture in a way
where we don't really know which way to
go
what direction to move to what would be
good for me would that be good for
everybody
is it selfish to do things for me
should i always think of the collective
what about what other people think
what if i make a decision now and
10 years from now i look back and it
ended up being the wrong one should i go
left right straight should i go
backwards should i stay still
i feel lost right now so that must be
i'm a loser
how can i possibly feel lost i have
everything i need i have a house i have
shelter i'm so ungrateful and look at
everybody else who has their lives
together and they have such direction
and purpose i wish i had that
i wish i had that
any of those thoughts have gone through
your mind i think you're in the right
place i know what it's like to be lost
completely confused disoriented where
you can't even lean on left and right
you don't even know where they are
you're in the dark
there's nothing to hold you you're
floating in limbo and you're paralyzed
by feeling a little stuck
you know what's funny everyone
that as
a personal coach to some and through
this podcast and when i'm on stage
i'm not one to offer you know direct and
rigid solutions
that that that can come from the person
i feel like it's my job and i really
enjoy
validating feelings and making people
realize that things aren't the end of
the world and where they are right now
can actually be a launch pad
and you can rest on that launchpad you
can prepare on that launchpad you can
get your spacesuit on on that launchpad
you can call friends on that launchpad
you can sleep on the launchpad
you can stay there for as long as you
want really
it's not my job to tell you what to do
but i think in this episode
it's it's
i'm i'm gonna invite you to think about
being lost in that feeling a little
differently and i think you'll find
comfort in it
how does that sound
good
all right
so yeah that was an intro now what do we
talk about
when
we feel lost
it doesn't mean
that you're a loser that you're hopeless
that that you're some kind of of nobody
that you're a reject that you're yeah
ungrateful or un unwilling to change
when you feel lost and you are lost it
means that you're going somewhere
it means that you're moving and you have
been moving
your life isn't stagnant in fact when
you're lost it's the complete
opposite
how awesome is that to think about
anyone who has done nothing with their
lives and has no aspirations or ambition
will rarely
feel lost because this isn't really a
creative person the creativity in us
that's the lostness because we're
looking for more we're searching and you
my friend are a seeker because a big
part about being human
is the need to discover and to explore
and to leave the shores of home for
something new not necessarily better
but for something new
to see what that's all about what this
is all about to make sense of the world
around us and see how it resonates
inside so you
are a seeker you are an explorer and
every explorer when they leave ashore
they get lost
we all get lost and what do you do when
you get lost
what do you do if you're out hiking
if you're out in a city you don't know
which way to turn what do you do
yeah
what do you do
now if you're my age or maybe a younger
you don't have paper maps anymore you
don't
i remember when i was going through
europe and everywhere i go when i was in
portugal when i was in mexico a few
weeks back
i take a compass with me
and i love looking at my compass
because i'm like okay the hostel is here
the hotel's here okay i know that that's
north and here that's pointing north and
let's go i love that analog kind of
feeling
and when i backpack i got lost lost on
purpose because it's fun to find your
way around and when you're lost that's
when you get to figure out where you
actually are
you know what i'm saying
so you can ground yourself in this
lostness but let's go back what do you
do when you're lost okay you're taking
out your phone
you're taking out a map
you're seeing how where am i oriented
here but
when you take a google maps
or apple maps whatever it's called
you're never like completely zoomed in
you want to take your index finger your
thumb or whatever little dinky fingers
you use and you want to pinch your phone
we're such little wussies today with our
i had a bit about that where like
there's no such thing as an alpha male
today because we all take out our little
little air pods and we put them in or
you want to fight you want to fight okay
one second click and put a little ear
get your little phone out all these
little devices
little babies we are but you take out
your phone you squeeze your little
fingers together and yeah you get a
bird's eye view of where you are
where am i if you're lost in the woods
what do you look to your left trees look
to your right trees ferns bushes flowers
but if you hold on to some eagle talons
and you let the eagle kind of pull you
up and you get to look down and okay
so this is where i am
now what do i want to do okay i see i
came from that way okay see i came
southwest okay i did that turn there
yeah that's what happened and then okay
then oh okay past the pond and now i'm
right here amongst the trees
um i see where okay i see where i went
left instead of right that's okay okay
so
depending on where you are in this lost
adventure
whether you're at sea on land wherever
you are
it's important to
try a few things
maybe even before you zoom out
because zooming out in a larger and
bigger sense means like let's take a
real big look at where you are in your
life right now
maybe that's too much right now you
don't need to do that
before you even look at your map
maybe you find a bench
you sit
you wait
remember in lord of the rings in the
minds of moria how gandalf forgot which
tunnel to go down
and he's like i have no memory of this
place this place
and
then he talks with frodo he has a little
smoke
and then oh
it's that way
see using time as your ally is really
good in these moments too orient
yourself reorient yourself and really
take a look at okay this is what i'm
surrounded by these are the choices i
can make but at the same time take your
time
is there a rush
sometimes we just need to do what we're
just keep doing what we're doing and a
solution presents itself without us even
trying
there's these there's the art of not
trying there's sometimes where we put so
much effort in
like what are you going to do plant a
seed and keep digging it up to see if
it's grown right and we keep pushing it
down into the soil we keep oh it's not
growing yet it must okay we got to
compact it more we got to flood it with
water what the heck is taking so long
you you plant the seed and you leave it
and you let nature do its thing
so you're lost okay i'm lost i don't
know exactly where i am right now
let's chill let's be still
let's be soft with ourselves
sometimes the solution presents itself
in front of us you don't need to do a
whole list of life goals right now if
being lost is pretty daunting you need
to ground yourself first
what am i going to do when i'm lost i'm
in the dark i don't know left from right
up from down
what am i going to do write down life
goals i can't find the pencil i can't
find the pen i'm in darkness here
sit down wait for some daylight to pop
in wait for some moonlight to show
itself through the cracks so you can see
where the left is you can see where the
right is and then you can make a
decision after all
we got so caught up in wanting to move
so fast all the time that it's no wonder
we find ourselves lost sometimes
but this is the opportunity to reorient
this happens to everybody
creative people more than most
one thing we have to realize and that i
have to realize is that
we're always embarking into the unknown
and there's always going to be a
decision where we
don't have enough information we never
do we know as much as we know and you
take a bit of a leap
and you see where it gets you
and if it doesn't get you exactly where
you want it which it rarely does then
you tweak a little more and you tweak a
little more and you tweak and you tweak
what else is life other than moving and
tweaking and stepping a little bit in
each direction to see where you can
really find your path in your way
my friends if you feel lost right now
the last thing i'd invite you to do is
beat yourself up
notice that critic within you that says
yeah you should be going somewhere why
are you lost why don't you just do the
thing why don't you be like everybody
else
find a purpose just find a job just do
this just do this what's wrong with you
i can't believe you made that decision
back then that's why you're lost in the
first place you really messed up this
time
be aware of that voice
you know
there's that exploratory nature in you
i'm sure because if you listen to this
podcast and you followed me for a while
you know that it's in me
and those who deal with depression and
anxiety such as myself from time to time
that's part of us we're seekers we're
big thinkers
uh we go deep
we go real deep
we pay the price for it sometimes
but we're sensitive to the world and
we're sensitive to our environment
which is why we get lost in the first
place
because we're always moving
we're always moving we're searching
we're checking stuff out
what are you going to be mad at yourself
for trying the fruits of the trees
maybe you got so caught up in the beauty
in the moment and you're trying tree by
tree and you're eating fruits and eating
fruits and trying plants and then then
you look around you're like oh shoot i
followed the trail of berries for too
long and now whoops i gotta find my way
again it could be that you were just
enjoying yourself so much
that now you're in a different place
what do we do when we're in that place
we don't know okay just remember grab
the eagle talons and see where you are
and if you if that's too soon
wait till the moonlight and sunlight
comes into where you are
reorient yourself
don't beat yourself up
we all get lost and this is a feeling
that
that i have to get used to
because i like embarking on new
adventures and i like to try new things
and my life and i'm sure yours it's not
a straight trajectory nobody's is
we find ourselves in these moments all
of the time
because life is unpredictable
we're throwing curveballs all the time
and sometimes i ask for curveballs
because i get bored of happiness and i
get bored of routine so i like
curveballs and i like the feeling of
being lost part of me really enjoys it
because what is it you really get to
know who you are
and where you are
when you feel lost
my friends this isn't a bad thing for
you
try to see it in a different light
try to see it as you as the adventurer
and seeker you on the hero's journey
that's just taking out his or her map
just to see where you are for a little
bit
take rest
take rest when you need there's no need
to move right now set up camp
make this your launch pad set up camp
get a base get a base camp going set up
a fire here set up the clothesline here
you know when we're camping i was up
north camping uh this weekend the
mosquitoes were freaking terrible
but nonetheless i was doing my cliff
jumping and i loved the adrenaline rush
but then doing some paddle boarding and
in order to set up your weekend
you gotta set up camp a little bit
because you know hey i'm here
i might as well be here for a while
like if you're on a trip
you can live out your suitcase but what
about at the airbnb hotel if you're
there for a little while you may as well
take things out of your suitcase and use
the dressers and drawers you may as well
makes it feel more like home
so stay awhile i set up the tent we set
up the firewood's going here we set up
the picnic bench going here the
barbecues are here right
set up a while
stay a while
be your own friend for now
and really look at yourself with being
okay
with feeling like this and being here
if we're here you may as well put your
feet where the ground are
or the ground is
put your feet where the ground is
really feel it
wherever you are right now
be there now
what do you do
what are you doing cooking you're in the
kitchen doing dishes you're making a
grilled cheese naked you on the living
room floor bedroom bathroom in the car
walking on the sidewalk biking on the
road
where are you
wherever you are be there
and know that the feeling of lostness is
just like ooh okay
let's check out the map
i like repeating myself in podcasts
so i'll say everything again
for the tenth time
let it really sink in maybe that's the
whole point i just
i need to remind myself of these things
that's why i make these episodes this is
for me too
not above you all in any way
i feel threatened by the lostness
sometimes
disoriented me i got vertigo i ah i'm
just so dizzy i'm tired i don't know
which way to go ah
i wish i wish i wish i should have i
could have i should have i could have
what if what if what if what if
mm-hmm
yeah
sit
what's the rush to change
is there a huge rush for you to make a
decision at this very second
at this very second if you don't make a
huge choice
is something really terrible going to
happen probably not
so take rest
in this feeling of lostness and know
what it is
it is
the adventurer's feeling
brought down from your ancestors and
their ancestors and their ancestors who
left shore on ships
most likely
if you're in the if you're in north
america
wherever you are really
we moved as people and we move and we
move and we move
and we rest and then we move
take rest during the stages of rest my
friend
let the lostness warm you
let the darkness sometimes just be
just that black velvet blanket that
we've always wanted like george costanza
who wants to dress in velvet
all day
let it be your velvet
gosh even be prideful about it for a
minute
that you're an adventurer and you're
making your way and you deserve
a little bit of rest
now to end this podcast episode thank
you for listening
i'd like to invite you to click on
something in the description
it's a link to join
zoom groups where you chat with me i'm
in the zoom there's like five of us
there's ten of us um join the newsletter
so you get
a notification in your inbox of when i'm
doing my next zoom call
with you
you know this is an impersonal way of
communication
and i hope you you got a little
something from this
but one thing when we're feeling lost
and we're feeling like we don't know
which way to go
oh how how nice is it to chill with
someone else in velvet you know to
bounce ideas off of each other because a
huge part is loneliness and that feeling
that i'm lost and nobody else feels this
way
when
we have these groups together and when i
chat with people and oh
you're feeling that i know exactly what
you mean yes yes yes
and that in itself reduces stress and
cortisol
that reduces the feeling of loneliness
and what is loneliness it's the feeling
that what you do and share doesn't
matter to anybody how would you like it
if people really cared about what you
shared and really felt what you shared
and have been there and maybe are there
and it's about meditating reflecting and
connecting that's what these zoom groups
are all about and i hope to have one
with you in a live stream
so i can meet you and we can chat
and um i'll be creating some more
content in the near future
but i'd like to thank you for listening
and i hope this brought some comfort to
your situation my friend
it's a good thing
it really is a good thing
chill on your launch pad just chill for
a bit
you'll know when to make the next move
take care this has been scott st marie
on the being human podcast
you know
i can't even end this thing it's been a
month since i did a podcast uh
one extra thing you know i don't think
i've ever asked this on a podcast
and i don't like asking anything from
listeners and this is part of me being
very uh
what do you call it
uh nice
but i'm going to say it right now if you
could it would mean a lot to me if you
just click the star on spotify if you
like this podcast give it a review on
itunes that would mean a lot to me and
it's not like there's thousands of
reviews and thousands of uh stars
so what you do really really makes a
difference in something like this
you know what am i gonna do write a
review on the joe rogan podcast who
cares but with something small you can
really make a difference
in my life and the lives of others by
you joining the newsletter on zoom
there's only a few of us that makes a
huge difference
and i think that's pretty special
because we're not
lost among all the fishies
that we can actually see each other and
really hear each other
so
if you want to do that i'd really really
appreciate it sincerely and and thank
you for for making it this far in the
podcast
you're not lost forever but while you're
feeling lost know that it's a good thing
and chill for a bit
you got this my friend has been scott st
marie
take care see you soon
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