The Principles of accepting of our Imperfections: "Wabi-sabi" 🍁 Interpreting Yourself

Happiness Podcast with Dr. Robert Puff
23 May 202112:00

Summary

TLDR「幸せのポッドキャスト」では、ドクター・ロバート・パフが人生における不完全さを肯定する日本哲学「侘寂(わびさび)」について話します。侘寂は、不完全さを受け入れ、美しさと見つめる姿勢です。茶の湯の茶碗から始まったこの思想は、人生の移ろいを肯定し、自己をなくすことを教えています。私たちは、年齢とともに変化し、夢と異なる現実に直面しますが、侘寂の視点から見ることで、それらを美しさと成長の証として受け止めることができます。このポッドキャストでは、他人だけでなく自分自身の不完全さを愛し、受け入れる力を持つ方法を探求します。

Takeaways

  • 🌟「不完全な美」を認める:私たちは人生の不完全さを認め、それを受け入れることが大切です。
  • 🎨「侘寂」の哲学:日本からきた「侘寂」は、人生の不完全さを美とし、受け入れることを教えてくれます。
  • 🍵茶の儀と侘寂:茶の儀での茶碗の不完全さが、侘寂の美の源となっています。
  • ⏳無常の認識:侘寂は人生の変化と無常を通じて美を発見するものです。
  • 💔心の傷と成長:私たちの過去の失敗や損傷は、私たちを形成し、成長させてくれます。
  • 🧘‍♂️自己批判から逃れる:他人や自分を批判することで苦しむのではなく、受け入れることが幸せにつながります。
  • 🤔考え方の変え方:日常の小さな出来事から、他人や自分への批判を美とし、受け入れることを練習します。
  • 👵年齢と経験の美:年齢のせいで現れるシワや変化は、経験と知恵の証であり、美しくもあります。
  • 🌱受け入れて愛する:私たちは人生の不完全さを愛し、受け入れることができる力を持っています。
  • 🙏感謝の心:不完全な自分を受け入れ、人生の全ての不完全さと美しさに感謝の気持ちを持つことが大切です。

Q & A

  • 「ハピネス・ポッドキャスト」とはどのようなポッドキャストですか?

    -「ハピネス・ポッドキャスト」は、Dr. Robert Puffが主催するポッドキャストで、人生における完璧さの欠如とそれに伴う幸福感の追求に関する議論を展開しています。

  • 完璧さの欠如とはどのようなものか、ポッドキャストでどのように説明されていますか?

    -完璧さの欠如とは、人々の体が年齢を重ねるにつれて変化し、皺が増えたり髪の毛が白くなったりするなど、理想と異なる状態になることを指しています。

  • ポッドキャストで紹介された「侘寂(わびさび)」とはどのような哲学ですか?

    -「侘寂(わびさび)」は、日本発祥の哲学であり、完璧さの欠如を受諾し、それを受け入れることで美しさを見出すアプローチです。茶の湯の伝統と深く関係しており、茶碗の不完全さにも美しさを認めるという考え方を基盤としています。

  • 「侘寂」の3つの主要な原則は何ですか?

    -「侘寂」の3つの主要な原則は、非永続性(物事が常に変化する)、苦しみ、そして虚無(自己の欠如)です。

  • 茶の湯における「侘寂」の具体例とは何ですか?

    -茶の湯において「侘寂」は、茶碗の完璧さの欠如を美と認識し、その不完全さを愛し、大切にすることを指します。

  • 西洋文化における「パチナ」とはどのような概念ですか?

    -「パチナ」は西洋文化における概念で、物が経年変化する過程を美しさと捉える考え方を指しています。

  • Dr. Robert Puffはどのようにして人々が完璧さの欠如を受け入れるようになるべきかについて話しましたか?

    -Dr. Robert Puffは、人々が他人や自分の完璧さの欠如を批判する代わりに、それを美しさと受け止めることで幸せを感じることができると語っています。

  • ポッドキャストで話された「私たちの考えは強力である」という主張とはどのような意味ですか?

    -これは、人々が抱える考え方が彼らの感情や行動に大きな影響を与えるとDr. Robert Puffが主張していることを意味しています。

  • ポッドキャストで紹介された、完璧さの欠如を美と認識するアプローチを実践する方法とはどのようなものか?

    -実践する方法としては、他人や自分の不完全さを批判する代わりに、それらを美しさと受け止め、愛と賞賛の念を持つことです。

  • 「侘寂」の哲学を採用することはどのように人生に影響を与えるとDr. Robert Puffは言っていますか?

    -Dr. Robert Puffは、「侘寂」の哲学を採用することによって人々は自分自身や他人を批判しないようになり、人生を美しい冒険のように楽しむことができると言っています。

  • ポッドキャストでDr. Robert Puffはどのようにして人生の完璧さの欠如を楽しむことができるかについて話しましたか?

    -Dr. Robert Puffは、人生の完璧さの欠如を自然な部分として受け入れ、それらを美と愛することで、人生を楽しむことができると話しています。

  • ポッドキャストで紹介された「侘寂」の哲学はどのようにして幸福感につながるとDr. Robert Puffは主張していますか?

    -Dr. Robert Puffは、「侘寂」の哲学を通じて人々が完璧さの欠如を受け入れることを通じて、批判的思考から解放され、幸福感につながると主張しています。

Outlines

00:00

😀 受け入れと美しさの哲学

初段落では、Dr. Robert Puffが「幸福度を損なう多くの要素のうち、最も大きなのは不完全さ」という考えを紹介しています。若い頃は体が美しいと感じるかもしれませんが、歳を重ねるにつれて皺が増えたり、髪が白くなるなど、不完全さが現れます。また、人生においては夢と現実が乖離し、心が傷つき、私たちは「損なわれもの」になったと感じることもあります。しかし、これらの不完全さを必ずしも悪いことと見る必要はなく、それらを美しく、私たち自身の一部として受け入れ、称えるべきだと述べています。日本では数百年前に「侘寂(わびさび)」という哲学が発展しました。これは人生の不完全さを受け入れ、それらを美しさと捉える方法です。茶の湯の伝統とその茶碗の作り方にも侘寂の考え方が反映されています。茶碗は完璧ではなく、時代とともに変化し、その変化を美と捉えることができたのです。

05:01

😌 侘寂の生活への取り組み

第二段落では、侘寂というアプローチを取り入れて人生をより美しく、楽しくする方法について話しています。まず重要なのは私たちの思考の力です。完璧さが唯一の価値あるものとし、不完全さを拒否する考えは苦しみへの道です。私たちは自分の思考を観察し、他人や自分の不完全さを判断するのではなく、それらを美しく、受け入れることを学ぶ必要があります。例えば、買い物をしているとき、レジでの店員を見て彼らの体型や顔の皺、仕事について否定的な考えを持つ代わりに、彼らの物語や美しさと価値を見出すことができると述べています。他人の不完全さを美しさと捉むことで、自分自身の不完全さをも受け入れ、愛せるようになります。侘寂のアプローチを取り入れることで、自分自身や他人を批判しなくなるでしょう。人生は美しい冒険となるのではなく、絶えず自分や他人を批判する辛い道になります。

10:02

🙏 不完全さを受け入れて美しさを発見する

最後の段落では、侘寂の哲学を取り入れて人生を楽しむ方法について話しています。私たちがコントロールできるのは自分の反応です。侘寂の哲学では、不完全さを愛し、美しさと見なすことができます。幸福な人生を送るためには、批判や攻撃ではなく、過ちから学び、成長し、変えられないことを受け入れ、自然な人生の一部として愛することが必要です。侘寂の哲学を通じて、年齢を重ねるにつれて、成功や失敗をも柔軟で親切な目で見ることができ、心の中で「あなたは完璧ではありませんが、あなたのありのままを完璧に愛しています」と言えるでしょう。このポッドキャストを通じて、受け入れと愛する力について学び、人生を楽しむことができます。

Mindmap

Keywords

💡幸福

「幸福」とは、人が心から満足感や喜びを感じる状態を指します。このポッドキャストでは、不完全さという要因が幸福を阻害するものとされており、不完全さを美しく受け入れることで幸福に近づくという考えが紹介されています。

💡不完全さ

「不完全さ」とは、物事が完璧でなく、欠陥や瑕疵がある状態を指します。ビデオでは、人間の体が老いることで生じるシワや白髪など、人生における不完全さが取り上げられており、それらを美しく見つめる視点を持つことの重要性が説かれています。

💡侘寂(わびさび)

「侘寂」とは、日本の美学の一つで、不完全さや老いを美しく見つめる哲学です。ビデオでは、侘寂を通じて人生の不完全さを肯定し、美しさと受け止めることの大切さが強調されています。

💡茶の湯

「茶の湯」とは、日本の伝統的な茶文化を体験する儀式であり、侘寂の精神が生み出された場の一つです。ビデオでは、茶碗の不完全さが侘寂の美しさとして受け入れられる例として紹介されています。

💡無常

「无常」とは、全ての物事が定まったものではなく、変化するという概念です。ビデオでは、侘寂の三つの主要な原則の一つとして取り上げられ、人生の変化とそれに伴う不完全さを肯定する考え方と関連しています。

💡苦しみ

「苦しみ」とは、精神的または肉体的な苦痛を指します。ビデオでは、不完全さを拒否することで生じる苦しみから解放されることの大切さが述べられており、侘寂の原則に関連しています。

💡虚無

「虚無」とは、自己の不存在または自己が所有するものがない状態を指します。ビデオでは、侘寂の原則の一つとして、自己を超えた美しさの発見へとつながる考え方として紹介されています。

💡パチナ

「パチナ」とは、物が経年変化し美しく輝くという概念です。ビデオでは、侘寂と同様に、物の老いを美しさと見つめる視点として説明されており、西洋文化における侘寂に相当するものと例えられています。

💡自己批判

「自己批判」とは、自分自身の行動や状態を厳しく評価する行為です。ビデオでは、自己批判が苦しみの原因となるとされ、侘寂の哲学を通じて自己批判を超え、自己を受け入れるよう励まされています。

💡受け入れる

「受け入れる」とは、物事を肯定し、受け止めることです。ビデオでは、侘寂の精神に基づいて、人生の不完全さや変化を肯定し、それらを受け入れることで幸福に近づくというメッセージが伝えられています。

Highlights

Imperfection is a significant barrier to happiness, as life often doesn't meet our expectations.

The concept of wabi-sabi, a Japanese philosophy, encourages embracing life's imperfections and finding beauty in them.

Wabi-sabi originated from the Buddhist tradition and is deeply rooted in the tea ceremony.

Wabi-sabi is based on three main principles: impermanence, suffering, and emptiness or the absence of an egoic self.

Imperfections in teacups were once seen as undesirable but later embraced as part of wabi-sabi.

The term 'patina' in Western culture relates to the beauty found in aging surfaces, similar to wabi-sabi.

Dr. Robert Puff emphasizes the power of our thoughts in shaping our perception of beauty and imperfection.

Negative thoughts about others' imperfections can lead to suffering; instead, we should see beauty in them.

Practicing wabi-sabi involves acknowledging the power of thoughts and changing our perspective on imperfection.

By accepting and loving others' imperfections, we can also do the same when looking at our own flaws.

Wabi-sabi encourages us to see beauty in the choices we've made, even if they weren't ideal.

Dr. Puff shares a personal story about the pride one can take in any job, reflecting the wabi-sabi philosophy.

Accepting life's impermanence and imperfections can lead to a more joyful and beautiful life.

Critiquing others and ourselves leads to suffering, whereas embracing imperfection leads to happiness.

Wabi-sabi allows us to love and accept ourselves and others, regardless of our imperfections.

Control over our response to life's challenges is the key to happiness, according to the wabi-sabi philosophy.

Dr. Puff concludes by encouraging gratitude for each day and embracing life's flawed beauty.

Transcripts

play00:03

welcome to the happiness podcast

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i'm dr robert puff there's a lot of

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things in life that can keep us from

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being happy

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but one of the big ones is imperfection

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when we're younger our bodies may look

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good they may be smooth

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and then with time we notice that wow

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i'm starting to get wrinkles or

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oh no my hair's starting to turn gray

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imperfections set in

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in other ways they do too we may be

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going through life

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dreaming of our soul mate meeting that

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person

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and then it doesn't work out and our

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hearts are broken

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and sometimes they feel damaged we're

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damaged goods now

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we're just not the same life can throw

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us so many

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curves that it makes it hard

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to stay happy because life just doesn't

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turn out the way

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we expected it to we wanted it to and

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because of that

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we begin to suffer maybe we had plans of

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being a doctor

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but we end up working at the local

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grocery store

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maybe we had plans of having a beautiful

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home overlooking the ocean

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and instead because we couldn't make our

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rent have moved back in with our parents

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maybe we had plans to come to hollywood

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and make it big

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in the movies but instead life said no

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you're going to get married you're going

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to have children and your hollywood

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dreams have died

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but what i want to ask ourselves really

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ask ourselves today

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are these imperfections necessarily a

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bad thing

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or could we see them as something

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beautiful part of who we are

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and that we can not only not be ashamed

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of them

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but actually celebrate them many

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centuries ago in the country of japan

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a philosophy an approach to life was

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developed

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that had deep wisdom in it you may have

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never heard of it

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but it's called wabi-sabi

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and at its core it's about learning to

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accept

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the imperfections of life not only

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accept them

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but embrace them and see the beauty of

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these imperfections and a manifestation

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of wabi-sabi

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began with the actual tea ceremony

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which many of us have heard of if

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perhaps even participated in

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it's a beautiful tradition celebrating

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the tradition of tea and the tea

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ceremony

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and of course when you drink tea you

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also have to have tea cups

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well historically the teacups had to be

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perfect

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beautifully shaped no imperfections at

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all

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and then the philosophy of wabi-sabi

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began to be developed

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and it comes from the buddhist tradition

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of three main principles

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one is impermanence the other is

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suffering

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and the third is emptiness or the

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absence of an egoic self

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but with the concept of impermanence

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that life does

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change it does not stay the same the

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most beautifully made cup

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will at times age or won't be made

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perfectly

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like the previous cup and what happened

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was

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with time these imperfections were seen

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as

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beautiful not something that is bad

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but something that is good that can be

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embraced

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that can be loved and be seen as

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beautiful

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in its own imperfections or the term

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that i love is

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flawed beauty so when the potter made a

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teacup

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he or she didn't have to make it

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perfectly and actually the imperfection

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in the cups

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were seen as something to embrace to

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love

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to cherish and to value

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if we're not familiar with the japanese

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culture we may be familiar with

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the western culture of the term patina

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which has to do with surfaces aging and

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seeing that aging process

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not as necessarily something bad but as

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something beautiful

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i think there's a tendency here in the

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west to see is something

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old or decrepit as ugly

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or something worth getting rid of or

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definitely not seen as beautiful

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but what if we were to begin to adopt

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the philosophy

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of wabi-sabi the thing i talk so often

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about in this happiness podcast

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is how powerful our thoughts are so if

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we start developing thoughts saying

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when we see something older we see

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something beautiful there

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imagine then when we look at our bodies

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our failures or

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all the tragedies we had in life

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and say that isn't ugly

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that's part of who i am now it shapes me

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it's

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memories and i'm going to begin to not

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only

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accept that but even love that

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so with the remainder of this talk let's

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discuss

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ways that we can embrace this wabi-sabi

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approach to living that can add so much

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beauty

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and joy to our life well the first and

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most important thing is

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to acknowledge that our thoughts are

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powerful

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whatever we think has force behind them

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in adopting a philosophy that only

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perfection

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is acceptable and i'm going to reject

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all imperfection

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is guaranteed to be the path of

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suffering and we're here to learn not to

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suffer

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so we have to look at our thoughts and

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say okay what am i thinking throughout

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the day

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am i looking at other people and judging

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them

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am i looking at my own behaviors and

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judging my imperfections

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that is the path of suffering

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and if we want to stop doing that we

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need to start

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seeing imperfections as something

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beautiful something worth embracing

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and all day long we can practice this

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for example

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we go out to get some groceries and as

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we're checking out we see the person

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behind the counter and we may think

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they're fat or may think

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they have wrinkles or we may think their

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job is stupid why are they doing such a

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silly job at their age

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all these negative thoughts about the

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imperfection of this person

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instead we can say in our minds wow

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they may be heavy but i don't know their

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story and their weight may be perfect

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for them

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and i find it beautiful we may look at

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their wrinkles and say

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i wonder what memories those wrinkles

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have

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and what wisdom they learn from those

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wrinkles we may look at their job and

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say

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isn't it beautiful that they work so

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hard and are willing to do this to

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support themselves and perhaps even a

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family

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i always remember years ago meeting this

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one man

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because he and his wife and his kids

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were so proud of him

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because he'd been out of work and he was

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able to get a job

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at a local fast food place and he was

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the cashier

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and he had that job and now he's able to

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support his family

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and they were gonna be okay and he was

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so proud that he had that job

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i too had worked fast food when i was

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younger i'd been trained to do other

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things now

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but at one point i did exactly what he

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did and if someday

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i need work doing that i'd be honored to

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do that job again

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so much of this is about seeing beauty

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in the flaws of life seeing beauty in

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the choices that we made

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that may not have been the way we wish

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they'd been but we grew from them

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we learn from them and we're moving

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forward and if someone is above us

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or someone is beneath us we still see

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the beauty in who they

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are and if we practice accepting

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and loving other people with their

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imperfections

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the most wonderful gift comes from that

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we'll do the same when we look in the

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mirror when we look at the flaws in our

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lives

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and remember the things that we've done

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that maybe we're not too proud of

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or the things we're doing now that

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aren't as pretty as we wish they were

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then we'll look and say but that's okay

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there is beauty in flawed

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there is beauty in imperfection

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there is beauty in impermanence

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and life is impermanent no matter how

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much i achieve

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no matter how much i fail i'm still a

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human being

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and i'm gonna love that human being and

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i'm gonna love

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other human beings and when i take that

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approach

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the wabi-sabi approach accepting

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the imperfections of life

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what i find is life goes better

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i stop judging others i stop judging

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myself

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and life becomes a beautiful adventure

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instead of a grind where we're

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constantly critiquing ourselves

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or critiquing others the people that

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truly do critique others a lot

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struggle because i can guarantee you

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they're critiquing themselves

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just as harshly or even more so when we

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stop looking at the imperfections of

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others

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as flaws and instead see it as something

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beautiful

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then when we look in the mirror

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physically or emotionally or spiritually

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we'll do the same we'll accept our

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imperfections

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and say this is who i am i can work on

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changing things if i can

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but things that i can't change i'll

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accept and even embrace

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and i'll embrace the imperfections of

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others too

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there are just so many factors in life

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that we don't have control over

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we don't choose our parents we don't

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choose our genetics

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there's so many things that we just

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can't control

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we don't choose how quickly our bodies

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age what shape we're in sometimes

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there's just so many things out of our

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control

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but the one thing that we do have

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control over

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is our response and with the philosophy

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of

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wabi-sabi we can begin to embrace

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and love our imperfections and not even

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see them as imperfections

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but something as beautiful it just makes

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sense

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accepting imperfections is one of the

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key ingredients of having a happy life

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and we all want to have happy lives i

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really believe that

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but we have to take the right approach

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criticism

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critiquing attacking is not going to

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lead to the path of happiness

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learning from our mistakes growing from

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them

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absolutely accepting the things that we

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can't change absolutely

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learning to love the things that are

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just natural part of life

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positively and when we approach

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life through a wabi-sabi philosophy

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i do think that we'll find that as we

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age

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as we have our successes and our

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failures in life

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we'll look at them with gentleness with

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kindness

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and we'll say in our hearts i know

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you're not perfect but i love you

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perfectly

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for the way you are thank you

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for each day you give me to enjoy life

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with all your imperfections with your

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flawed

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beauty

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thank you for joining me on the

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happiness podcast

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if you'd like to learn more about the

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podcast please go to

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happinesspodcast.org

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and until next time accept what is

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love what is

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you

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