How to Feel Gratitude for the Present Moment | Eckhart Tolle

Summary

The speaker emphasizes the importance of appreciating life's small moments and becoming comfortable with 'not knowing.' By letting go of constant thinking and future-orientation, one can find inner stillness and presence. This shift leads to a deeper sense of self, free from comparison and ego, where self-esteem no longer depends on external factors. The talk explores the power of attention to everyday details, likening it to gratitude, and highlights the beauty in simplicity. Ultimately, the speaker encourages embracing the present, valuing both stillness and movement as paths to deeper awareness.

Takeaways

• 🌟 Gratitude and appreciation can be found in the little things that make up our daily lives.
• 🧘‍♂️ Embracing a state of not knowing allows us to enter a state of non-conceptual knowing, which is a form of consciousness where we are present without the need for thought.
• 🤔 Becoming comfortable with not knowing is a form of trust that can lead to a reduction in ego and the unobserved mind.
• 🔍 Self-esteem issues dissolve in the state of no thought, as we stop seeking perceived value in a conceptual sense of self.
• 🌈 The true source of self-esteem comes from an inner stillness and the realization of our infinite value as part of the essence that underlies the universe.
• 🚶‍♂️ Paying attention to the present moment, even in seemingly mundane activities, can lead to a reduction in the generation of future-oriented thoughts and an increase in appreciation for the current experience.
• 🎨 The beauty and significance of everyday objects and scenes can be overlooked, but they hold a profound sense of presence and aliveness when truly observed.
• 👀 By giving attention to the little things, we can shift our perspective from viewing our environment as merely a means to an end to appreciating it for its beingness.
• 🌱 The practice of being present and attentive to the moment can transform even the most ordinary activities into significant and enjoyable experiences.
• 🌐 The concept of self-esteem as comparative is replaced by an understanding of our inherent value that is not relative to others but is a realization of our true nature.
• 💭 Dreams can reflect different levels of consciousness, with deep dreams often providing profound teachings, while surface dreams may reflect the mind's disconnection from source.

Q & A

What does the speaker suggest is the secret to dealing with the state of not knowing?

The speaker suggests that the secret to dealing with the state of not knowing is becoming comfortable with it, which involves trusting in the process and entering a state of non-conceptual knowing.

How does the speaker describe the relationship between self-esteem and the state of no thought?

The speaker describes that in the state of no thought, questions about self-esteem resolve themselves into nothingness because one is no longer looking for perceived value in a conceptual sense of self. Self-esteem comes from realizing the infinite value that one is, not possesses.

What is the role of stillness in developing self-esteem according to the speaker?

The speaker suggests that the power of inner stillness is the true seed of self-esteem. It allows one to feel neither inferior nor superior and to realize the infinite value that underlies the entire universe.

How does the speaker define the ego in the context of feeling superior or inferior?

The speaker defines the ego as the aspect of oneself that feels either superior or inferior. It is always comparative and is contrasted with the state of inner stillness where one feels neither.

What is the significance of the speaker's statement about being a 'small guy'?

The speaker uses the term 'small guy' to illustrate that physical size or ego does not determine one's sense of self-worth or power when one is connected to the present moment and the essence of being.

What is the danger of the spiritual ego according to the speaker?

The danger of the spiritual ego is that it can still hold onto a conceptual sense of self, even when one thinks they are spiritual. This can lead to a false sense of superiority over others, which is a trap some spiritual teachers fall into.

Why does the speaker recommend paying attention to the little things in life?

The speaker recommends paying attention to the little things in life because it helps one to appreciate the present moment and the ease and presence of things, rather than viewing everything as a means to an end.

What is the importance of being present when handling objects, as described by the speaker?

The importance of being present when handling objects is to appreciate their simple presence and to not regard them solely as means to an end. This practice helps in developing a deeper appreciation for the present moment.

How does the speaker relate the art of still life to the practice of being present?

The speaker relates the art of still life to the practice of being present by highlighting how artists began to appreciate and depict the beauty in seemingly insignificant things, which mirrors the practice of giving attention to the little things in life.

What is the significance of the journey to the shop according to the speaker?

The significance of the journey to the shop, according to the speaker, is to appreciate every step of the journey and look around, making the time spent traveling not just a means to an end but a moment of significance.

What are the two types of dreams the speaker mentions and what do they represent?

The speaker mentions deep dreams and surface dreams. Deep dreams represent a connection with the source where teachings arise naturally, while surface dreams represent a disconnection from the source and are filled with challenges and restlessness.

Outlines

00:00

🌟 Embracing the Unknown

The speaker emphasizes the importance of appreciating the little things in life and being present. They discuss the concept of gratitude and the value of stillness before speaking. The speaker humorously admits to not knowing what to say initially, highlighting the discomfort of not knowing. They introduce the idea of becoming comfortable with the state of not knowing as a form of trust, which is crucial for entering a state of non-conceptual knowing. This involves being present without labeling or thinking, which can alleviate issues like self-esteem that are rooted in conceptual thinking.

05:08

🌈 Dissolving Self-Esteem Issues

In this paragraph, the speaker explores the concept of self-esteem, noting how it can be a problem for many, fluctuating between low self-esteem and an exaggerated sense of self-worth. They critique the conventional methods of improving self-esteem, suggesting that these approaches are often comparative and superficial. The speaker advocates for a state of no thought and large presence, where self-esteem issues dissolve because one is no longer seeking value in a conceptual sense of self. Instead, they argue for an inner stillness that provides a true sense of self-esteem, unattached to comparisons or external validation.

10:09

🧘‍♂️ The Spiritual Journey of Non-Conceptual Knowing

The speaker talks about the spiritual journey towards the present moment, which involves becoming comfortable with not knowing and not thinking. They suggest that this comfort allows one to access the source of all knowledge. The speaker also discusses how this practice can weaken the ego, which is the unobserved mind that runs one's life. They recommend paying attention to the present moment and the little things in life, as this can reduce the generation of future-oriented thoughts and bring more peace to the present.

15:11

🎨 Appreciating the Beauty in the Mundane

Here, the speaker discusses the importance of giving attention to the seemingly insignificant aspects of life, drawing a parallel to still life artists who focused on the beauty of ordinary objects and scenes. They argue that by appreciating the mundane, one can find a sense of presence and aliveness that is often overlooked. The speaker suggests that this appreciation is a form of gratitude, but not in the traditional sense of saying 'thank you.' Instead, it's an appreciation for the mere existence of things and the experience of life's little details.

20:11

🌍 Living in the Present Moment

The speaker emphasizes the joy of contemplating the little things that surround us, suggesting that this can bring a sense of gratitude and appreciation for the perceived world. They argue that every moment is significant and that there is only ever the present moment. The speaker encourages appreciating the journey, not just the destination, and finding enjoyment in the present, whether one is contemplative or engaged in action. They also share personal experiences of dreams that reflect different states of mind, highlighting the difference between when the mind is connected to the source and when it is disconnected.

25:14

🌌 The Mind's Connection to Source

In this brief paragraph, the speaker alludes to the concept of the mind's connection to the source, suggesting that when the mind is connected, profound and positive experiences can occur. This paragraph serves as a transition or a teaser for further discussion on the topic, hinting at the potential for deep insights and teachings when one is in tune with a higher consciousness.

Keywords

💡Presence

Presence refers to being fully engaged in the present moment, without being distracted by thoughts of the past or future. In the video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of giving attention to the 'little things' and appreciating the 'now,' suggesting that this practice allows us to experience life more fully. Presence is central to the speaker's message about finding peace and understanding in life.

💡Stillness

Stillness is the state of inner calm and tranquility where one's mind is free from active thinking. The speaker often pauses and refers to the 'power of inner stillness,' which allows for deeper self-awareness and a connection to something beyond the ego. It's a recurring theme in the video, representing a space where one can find clarity and appreciate the present moment.

💡Gratitude

Gratitude in the video is presented as a deep appreciation for life’s little moments and the things around us. The speaker mentions how giving attention to the present and appreciating the 'little things' in life is sometimes called gratitude. It involves recognizing the value of our experiences and surroundings, which brings a sense of fulfillment and connection to life.

💡Ego

The ego is the sense of self that is rooted in comparisons, judgments, and the need for validation. The speaker explains how the ego can be either 'inferior or superior' and can lead to an unobserved, mind-driven life. By learning to be comfortable with not knowing and practicing stillness, one can weaken the ego's influence and move towards a more genuine sense of self.

💡Non-conceptual knowing

Non-conceptual knowing refers to understanding or awareness that arises without the interference of thoughts or labels. The speaker contrasts this with thinking or 'conceptual knowledge,' emphasizing that by being comfortable with not knowing, one can access a deeper state of consciousness. This idea is closely tied to moments of silence or gaps between sentences, where true insight can emerge.

💡Self-esteem

Self-esteem in the video is discussed as a concept often rooted in comparison and external validation. The speaker suggests that true self-esteem comes from being present and connected to one's inner stillness, rather than seeking validation from others. This form of self-esteem is not comparative and is derived from recognizing one’s intrinsic value, rather than fluctuating based on circumstances.

💡Attention

Attention is the act of being fully aware and engaged with the present moment and one’s surroundings. The speaker urges the audience to 'give more attention to the present moment,' especially to 'the little things' in life, suggesting that this practice leads to a greater appreciation and understanding of one’s existence. By focusing on the present, one can move away from a future-oriented mindset.

💡Not knowing

Not knowing is the state of being comfortable with uncertainty and ambiguity, without rushing to fill the void with thoughts or concepts. The speaker shares how being in this state is often uncomfortable but ultimately leads to deeper insight and understanding. It involves trusting the process of life and being open to whatever arises in the present moment, which the speaker describes as an essential part of spiritual practice.

💡Conceptual sense of self

The conceptual sense of self is the identity we build based on thoughts, comparisons, and societal labels. The speaker highlights how this sense of self is often tied to the ego, which seeks to compare and differentiate itself from others. In contrast, letting go of this conceptual identity allows one to experience a more authentic and non-comparative sense of being.

💡Journey without distance

The 'journey without distance' refers to the process of becoming present and connected to oneself without physically going anywhere. The speaker uses this phrase to describe the spiritual journey of moving into the present moment, which is more about inner exploration than external travel. It emphasizes that true understanding and fulfillment are found within, rather than in reaching external goals.

Highlights

Appreciation of little things leads to gratitude.

Life is mainly composed of small moments.

Stillness before speaking allows for comfort with not knowing.

Not knowing can be a place of discomfort or a source of creativity.

Trust is key to becoming comfortable with the state of not knowing.

Non-conceptual knowing is achieved by being uncomfortable with conceptual thinking.

In the state of not knowing, thoughts do not dictate actions.

Self-esteem issues dissolve in a state of no thought and large presence.

True self-esteem comes from inner stillness, not comparison.

The ego can manifest as spiritual superiority, which is a trap.

The spiritual journey is about becoming comfortable with not thinking.

Observing the mind leads to the ego's gradual weakening.

Attention to the present moment reduces future-oriented thinking.

Appreciating the journey, not just the destination, makes life more enjoyable.

The art of still life reflects the beauty in the mundane.

Artists like the Dutch painters capture the presence and aliveness in ordinary scenes.

Giving attention to the little things brings an appreciation for the ease of life.

Contemplating the little things can bring a sense of gratitude.

Every moment is significant and should be appreciated.

Dreams can reflect the mind's connection or disconnection from the source.

Transcripts

- When I say give attention,

there's an element of appreciation of everything,

of the little things.

(calming music)

And you begin to realize that your entire life consists

mainly of little things.

You're always going from here to there,

looking around, handling things.

That is sometimes called gratitude.

(bell dinging)

As you might have noticed,

it always takes a while before I start to speak.

I often say it's good to start with a moment of stillness.

And it is.

But the main reason is that I don't know what to say.

(audience laughing)

And that could be a very uncomfortable place

or situation to be in.

Some people have nightmares like that.

You're on stage, curtain opens and suddenly you're facing

an audience and you've forgotten your lines.

But I don't have any lines, so.

(audience laughing)

So, here's the secret.

It's becoming comfortable with the state of not knowing.

Otherwise it would be awful.

Oh my God.

What can I say now?

Would be terrible.

And of course, that is a kind of trust,

which I suggested the other day

is a better word for faith, trust.

And that's incredibly important

to become comfortable with not knowing.

But what do you do when you become comfortable

with not knowing?

You enter the state of non-conceptual knowing,

but you have to be uncomfortable with

not knowing anything on a conceptual level,

thinking in other words.

So another way of putting it is to say that

when I come on here and then I sit, I don't think,

'cause that's the state of not knowing.

And in the gaps between sentences or words,

I also don't think.

Rather than there's no next sentence or word being prepared,

it just comes.

And that's for you.

I'm saying that because

that also is a state of consciousness

that you can enter and you're doing it to some extent

when you don't label things,

when you step back from thought,

become comfortable with just being present.

And all these questions of things like self-esteem,

which apparently is a problem for many people.

Either they have low self-esteem

or they have exaggerated self-esteem

or it fluctuates.

And there are books written

about how you can improve your self-esteem

and probably workshops.

I don't know what they teach you,

maybe it's good, maybe not.

But the simple thing is that

in that state of no thought, but a large presence,

all these questions about self-esteem resolve themselves

into nothingness because you're no longer looking

for some perceived value

in a conceptual sense of self, the personality.

And you can sense the power that is within you

that has nothing to do with a person.

And that's where your self-esteem comes from.

And it's not comparative.

In the normal state of consciousness,

self-esteem is always comparative.

How do I rate myself relative to this person

and that person and that and on what level?

External appearance, strength, knowledge,

beauty, possessions, status. (giggles)

And of course you are always inferior to some

in one or two or three areas,

and you may be superior to some in another one or two areas.

But that's the power of stillness.

That's another way of putting it.

The power of inner stillness

that is the true seed of self-esteem.

And you can't really call it self-esteem anymore.

But you realize

the infinite value that you, not possess,

but are because that is the essence

that underlies the entire universe.

It is the light of the world.

And you don't compare yourself to others anymore.

You feel neither inferior nor superior.

The ego is always either inferior or superior.

So you might be surprised if I tell you, I'm a small guy,

even if I'm standing next to a big muscular guy

towering above me with a big ego,

I'm not thinking of anybody in particular in the moment,

but it has happened in the past.

I don't feel inferior.

Nor do I feel superior.

You might have a big body and muscles,

but I'm the spiritual guy. (audience laughing)

That of course is the ego talking.

And this is a very interesting strategy of the ego.

The spiritual ego can come in and without you knowing it,

you still have a conceptual sense of self,

but it's turned spiritual.

It's a trap that some spiritual teachers fall into too.

And you know it when they make certain pronouncements.

We touched on this before.

And that is they explain

that they are superior to any other teacher for example.

Either any other teacher alive now

or I've seen one or two spiritual teachers

or read about them who actually claimed

that they are superior to any spiritual teacher

that's ever lived or ever will live.

(audience laughing)

Well, that should cover it.

(audience laughing)

Here or any other galaxy.

(audience laughing)

So the most important practice on your journey,

spiritual journey into the present moment,

the journey without distance

is to become comfortable with not knowing,

which means to become comfortable with not thinking.

You don't need to demand that there should be long periods

when you're not thinking,

just moments when you're simply looking, listening,

perceiving or being.

And you don't know anything in that moment.

Not conceptually, but you access the source

of all knowledge.

Knowledge of all knowing.

And that is a way for the ego to

gradually become

weaker.

Just gradually subside, no longer runs your life,

which is what is the ego?

The unobserved mind.

It may still come in here and there, it probably will.

That's fine.

So part of this is of course

to give more attention to the present moment

because the more you think, the more future you generate.

And the more tension you give to the present moment,

the less thinking, because to be really present,

you don't think about it.

You just are with it. Give it attention.

I recommend the little things of life to be more attentive

to all the little things that make up every hour

of every day, every minute, every hour.

And give them more attention.

Walking steps, one step at a time.

Objects that you're handling.

All the time you're handling objects in your life,

you're always touching something,

putting something here and there.

Is everything that you handle just a means to an end?

Or are you able to just appreciate

the simple presence of even of a so-called inanimate object?

Contemplation also of all the lovely things

that make up your environment, part of your environment.

For example, if I were sitting here alone,

let's say I'm waiting for everybody to arrive.

I might be sitting here looking course at the floor.

Sense of stillness.

And then there's a glass table here,

and then there's a glass of water here,

and there's a clock and a bell and tissues.

And they all reflect the light in different ways.

There's a little bit of a rainbow in fact

in the glass of water here.

And then the lights are reflected on the bells

almost like a mirror.

And there's the clock ticking away.

It's a beautiful scene.

Sometimes you go to an art gallery,

well, not so much with modern art,

but a very favorite, favorite thing

would be still life artists.

And it took a while in art before they discovered

the artists in the history of art

before they discovered the seemingly insignificant things

and started to give attention to those.

Before that happened,

they were very much interested in the huge things,

the saints or the kings or the huge battle scenes.

They painted those things or the important people

or some dramatic thing,

volcanic eruption or whatever, fire.

And then at some point they started to discover

the beauty and the incredible sense of the quality

that is in the little things.

They started painting, for example, simple people.

The Dutch artists.

Perhaps I'm not that knowledgeable about artists,

but the famous Dutch paintings,

it's not so much big important people.

They show simple people.

A woman in the kitchen baking bread,

simple people sitting around the table

eating a very simple meal.

And there's a light, incredible light effects.

Light comes through the window.

There's an incredible sense of presence

and aliveness in the painting.

And this is a scene that in normal life

you would never have, unless you're really very conscious,

nobody would've stopped and said,

"Oh, isn't that amazing?

These people are sitting around a table eating a simple meal

and there's light coming through the window."

Nobody would've done that.

Perhaps after more of these artists depicted

relatively seemingly insignificant things,

perhaps it motivated some people

to give more attention to that.

But even now, people very much overlook that.

And you overlook then a large part of your life.

You don't give it attention.

When I say give attention,

there's an element of appreciation of everything,

of the little things.

And you begin to realize that your entire life

consists mainly of little things.

Even if you're VIP, it still consists mainly.

You're always sitting somewhere, standing somewhere,

looking around, handling things.

Going from here to there.

Either on a bus or your private jet.

And this giving attention

that is sometimes called gratitude.

That's kind of part of it, this appreciation.

But I don't necessarily use the word gratitude too often

because it implies that you say to somebody,

"Oh, thank you."

But there's a simple appreciation of the easiness of things,

of their presence.

So you no longer regard, almost continuously,

your entire environment as a means to an end.

And what's the end?

You need to get to some future moment

where suddenly everything is going to be better than now.

And so you're always on your way.

It's a stepping stone to the next moment

and every object that you handle

has only utilitarian value, but has no value in itself.

It's never appreciated for its beingness.

And then you do the same to human beings.

They're only regarded, what can they do for me now?

How do they fit into my schemes, into my plans?

Because there's a future orientation continuously,

which is the mind.

'Cause there is no future.

It's created by the mind. (giggles)

It becomes extremely enjoyable just to be contemplating

the little things that surround you.

There is an element of gratitude that comes with it.

This appreciation, it's an element where you appreciate

the sense perceived world.

This is an aspect of reality.

It's not the deepest aspect of reality,

but it is the surface of the ocean and it's beautiful.

And that it also means

it's not just when you are quietly contemplating,

it's also when you are going from A to B

to perform some action.

You're going to buy something,

going to the whatever it is, post office.

Appreciate the journey and every step of the journey

and look around so that the 10 minutes of going to the shop

or driving to the shop or taking a bicycle to the shop

isn't completely wasted and reduced to means to an end.

Every moment is significant.

And ultimately it's only ever the one moment.

And then this waiting game comes to an end.

Waiting for the big break.

That's an expression.

I don't know what breaks, but waiting for whatever it is.

Of course you have a goal.

You may have a goal in life and you're moving towards it,

but in the meantime, this is now.

And yes, you know you're moving towards it.

It becomes very enjoyable to be wherever you are

when you have this ability to contemplate the little things.

Both when you are passively contemplating

or even when you are moving and being engaged with things.

I started off with the talking about coming on stage

and not knowing what to say.

I'll tell you about dreams that I sometimes have.

Two types of dreams.

Because dreams can come from different levels.

They are deep dreams and they are surface dreams.

In deep dreams, I sit in front of an audience like this

and it's basically very much like this.

And I speak and wonderful things coming out of my mouth,

and I don't know where they come from

and the teaching arises and I can sense the...

And sometimes I know towards the end that it's a dream.

And then in the dream I think,

"Oh, it would be nice to remember what I just said."

(audience laughing)

But usually I don't.

It is almost like in the deepest dreams,

in some astral dimension,

the teaching is actually happening.

And then occasionally I have a surface dream

in which I enter a building to give a talk

and then things happen.

For example, I can't find the entrance to the stage.

(audience laughing)

And when I finally find it,

then the audience is very restless and they're moving about

and they're not even paying attention to me.

And then other things go wrong.

And so these dreams come from

when the mind is disconnected, theorize,

and when the mind is connect with source,

then this is what happens.