Learn this before dating anyone

Summary

The speaker emphasizes the importance of not speaking negatively about one's partner, especially to others, to prevent outside influences from damaging the relationship. They share personal experiences, highlighting the consequences of sharing too much with friends and family, and stress the need for internal resolution of issues. The speaker also discusses the impact of external opinions on self-esteem and the need for self-love, concluding with the message to keep outside influences at bay to maintain a healthy relationship and self-image.

Takeaways

• 🤐 Never talk negatively about your partner to others to avoid giving people the chance to influence your relationship negatively.
• 🔒 Be cautious about sharing personal relationship issues with others, as it can lead to vulnerability and misuse of your trust.
• 🏠 If you can't resolve issues with your partner, consider that there might be a deeper problem in the relationship.
• 🗣️ It's important to address and resolve issues within the relationship rather than relying on external advice.
• 👫 Be mindful of the reputation you create about your partner by what you say about them to others.
• 🚫 Avoid 'bashing' your ex or current partner to others, as it can escalate negative feelings and create a toxic environment.
• 👂 The influence of friends and family on a relationship can be significant, and sometimes harmful.
• 💔 Constantly focusing on negative aspects of a relationship can overshadow the positive and lead to its downfall.
• 🤔 Be aware of the potential for outside influences to alter your perspective and decisions about your relationship.
• 🌟 Keep the beauty and positivity of your relationship to yourself, and don't let others' opinions or actions tarnish it.

Q & A

Why does the speaker recommend not talking bad about your partner to others?

The speaker recommends not talking bad about your partner to others because it can invite negative influences into your relationship, which can sever the bond you have with your partner.

What are the risks of sharing relationship issues with people outside the relationship?

Sharing relationship issues with others can lead to people influencing your thoughts negatively, causing you to rely on external opinions rather than solving problems directly with your partner.

What does the speaker mean by 'fix the problems in house'?

'Fix the problems in house' means resolving relationship issues internally between partners without involving external parties or influences.

How can talking negatively about your partner to others affect their reputation?

Talking negatively about your partner can create a one-sided and unfair reputation, as people may focus only on the negative aspects while ignoring the positive things your partner has done.

Why does the speaker emphasize accountability when discussing their past relationships?

The speaker emphasizes accountability to show that they recognize their own mistakes, such as discussing relationship issues with others, and to highlight that they tried not to speak negatively about their ex.

What negative impact did involving her parents have on the speaker's relationship?

Involving her parents in their relationship issues permanently changed the dynamic, as it led to external influences affecting their relationship and caused long-term harm.

Why does the speaker advise against letting people into your relationship?

The speaker advises against letting people into your relationship because external influences can create misunderstandings, interfere with decision-making, and ultimately damage the relationship.

What type of advice does the speaker give when discussing relationships?

The speaker gives 'perspective advice,' offering different viewpoints without instructing others on what to do. They aim to help people make informed decisions without imposing their own opinions.

What does the speaker mean by 'keep the outside outside' in a relationship?

'Keep the outside outside' means not letting external influences, opinions, or people interfere with the relationship, as it is the internal dynamics that should matter most.

How does the speaker relate self-love to handling external influences?

The speaker suggests that just as one should protect a relationship from external influences, one should also protect their self-esteem from external opinions. Self-love must come from within, not be determined by others' views.