How I deal with ANXIETY as a $100,000,000 CEO..

Summary

In this candid video, the speaker shares personal strategies for coping with less-than-perfect days, emphasizing the importance of not overreacting to negative emotions. They discuss the counterproductive nature of trying to 'fix' feelings of stress or anxiety, suggesting instead to 'do nothing' and continue with daily plans. The speaker advocates for living by one's values rather than being swayed by emotions, and offers three practical approaches: setting aside time to acknowledge feelings, writing down thoughts to gain perspective, and reminding oneself that emotions are temporary. The video encourages viewers to accept the natural ebb and flow of emotions and to strive for consistency in their actions, regardless of how they feel.

Takeaways

• 😔 Acceptance: The speaker acknowledges that it's okay not to feel 100% and suggests accepting emotions rather than trying to fix them.
• 🤔 Reflection: Setting aside time to reflect on feelings without judgment can be beneficial for mental health.
• 📝 Writing: Writing down emotions can help process them more objectively and find a silver lining.
• 🧘‍♀️ Mindfulness: Reminding oneself that thoughts and emotions are transient can reduce their impact.
• 🚫 No Overhaul: The speaker advises against completely overhauling one's life due to temporary feelings of being unwell.
• 🛑 Do Nothing: Sometimes, the best approach when feeling unwell is to do nothing and let the emotions pass.
• 💪 Consistency: Continuing with planned activities despite feeling unwell can help maintain consistency and values.
• 🌟 Positivity in Negativity: Finding positivity in negative emotions can help improve one's perspective.
• 🌱 Growth: The speaker suggests that handling emotions better now than in the past indicates personal growth.
• 🔍 No Silver Bullet: There's no one-size-fits-all solution to feeling good; it's about learning to function despite negative feelings.

Q & A

What is the main topic of the video?

The main topic of the video is how the speaker handles not feeling 100 percent, dealing with bad days or being in a bad mood.

Why does the speaker feel stressed in the video?

The speaker is stressed due to work and personal issues, lack of sleep, and moving into a new apartment without being settled yet.

What does the speaker suggest as a solution when not feeling well?

The speaker suggests doing nothing, accepting the emotion, and not trying to problem-solve the feeling of not being 100 percent.

Why does the speaker believe that problem-solving when feeling unwell can perpetuate the problem?

The speaker believes that problem-solving can perpetuate the problem because it tells the brain there is something wrong with feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or sad, rather than accepting these emotions.

What is the speaker's approach to maintaining their values even when not feeling well?

The speaker's approach is to do their best and not change their plans, regardless of how they feel, to uphold their values.

How does the speaker feel about the idea of overhauling their life when feeling unwell?

The speaker thinks that overhauling one's life is not necessary when feeling unwell, as it's a natural part of life to sometimes feel overwhelmed.

What are the three go-to strategies the speaker uses when not feeling great?

The three strategies are: setting aside time to feel the emotion, writing down their feelings, and reminding themselves that thoughts and emotions are temporary.

Why does the speaker set aside time to feel their emotions?

Setting aside time helps the speaker to be present with their feelings and acknowledges that it's okay to feel that way.

How does writing down feelings help the speaker?

Writing down feelings helps the speaker to be more objective and often leads to finding the silver lining in the negativity.

What is the speaker's view on the reliability of thoughts and emotions?

The speaker views thoughts and emotions as unreliable and temporary, which will come and go.

What is the speaker's advice on how to function when not feeling good?

The speaker advises to stop searching for a silver bullet to feeling good and to learn how to do things even when not feeling well.

Outlines

00:00

😔 Embracing Bad Days

The speaker discusses their current stress and anxiety stemming from work and personal life, including moving to a new apartment. They share their realization that sometimes doing nothing is the best approach when feeling unwell. The speaker emphasizes the importance of not trying to fix every negative emotion, as it can perpetuate the problem. Instead, they advocate for accepting emotions and continuing to uphold personal values and plans despite feeling less than 100%. They also mention the danger of letting emotions dictate one's actions, which can lead to a cycle of not fulfilling personal goals.

05:00

🤔 Managing Emotions

The speaker offers three strategies for managing emotions when not feeling great. First, they suggest setting aside time to feel and process emotions, which can provide a sense of control and help manage negative feelings. Second, they recommend writing down emotions, which can lead to a more objective understanding and potentially finding a silver lining. Lastly, they advise reminding oneself that thoughts and emotions are transient, and they will pass. The speaker concludes by encouraging viewers to live according to their values, not their emotions, and to continue doing what they planned despite not feeling well.

Keywords

💡Feeling 100

The phrase 'feeling 100' is colloquially used to express being in top form or at one's best. In the video, the speaker discusses how they handle days when they're not feeling 100 percent, meaning they're not at their best or experiencing less than optimal mental or physical health. The speaker's personal example of being stressed and not having slept well illustrates this concept.

💡Problem Solving

Problem solving refers to the process of identifying a problem and determining the best way to solve it. The video script mentions that as entrepreneurs and CEOs, individuals are often adept at problem solving. However, the speaker suggests that when they're not feeling well, the instinct to problem solve can exacerbate the issue, as it can create a cycle of negative emotions.

💡Acceptance

Acceptance in this context means acknowledging and embracing one's current emotional state without judgment. The speaker talks about the importance of accepting emotions like anxiety or stress instead of fighting them, which can make the situation worse. This concept is central to the video's message of not letting emotions dictate one's actions.

💡Overstimulated

Being overstimulated refers to experiencing an excessive level of stimulation, often leading to stress or anxiety. The speaker uses this term to describe their own state of feeling overwhelmed and unable to settle into their new apartment, which contributes to their overall feeling of not being 100 percent.

💡Doing Nothing

In the video, 'doing nothing' is presented as a counterintuitive approach to handling bad days. Instead of trying to fix the problem or change one's circumstances, the speaker suggests that sometimes the best response is to do nothing and let the emotions pass. This aligns with the theme of not overreacting to negative feelings.

💡Values

Values are principles or standards that guide one's behavior and decision-making. The speaker emphasizes living in accordance with one's values rather than obeying one's emotions. This means continuing to act in ways that align with what one believes in, even on days when one doesn't feel well.

💡Overhaul

An overhaul refers to a thorough review or restructuring of something. The script mentions the tendency to want to overhaul one's life or routine when feeling bad, such as seeking new routines or treatments. The speaker advises against this drastic approach, suggesting that it's more beneficial to accept temporary feelings of being unwell.

💡Mental Management

Mental management involves the strategies and techniques used to control or influence one's mental state. The speaker outlines three strategies for managing their mental state when not feeling well, such as setting aside time to feel bad, writing down feelings, and reminding oneself that emotions are transient.

💡Silver Lining

A silver lining refers to a positive aspect or outcome in an otherwise negative or difficult situation. The speaker discusses finding the silver lining by recognizing the progress they've made in handling their emotions, even when they're feeling bad.

💡Transience of Emotions

The concept that emotions are transient means they do not last forever and will change over time. The speaker reassures viewers that emotions come and go, and it's unnecessary to alter one's life drastically when experiencing negative emotions, as they are a normal part of life.

💡Rational Emotions

Rational emotions are those that are considered logical or reasonable based on the situation. The speaker implies that emotions are often not rational, suggesting that they can be disproportionate to the actual circumstances. This idea supports the video's theme of not letting emotions dictate one's actions.

Highlights

The speaker shares personal strategies for dealing with bad days and feeling less than 100%.

The realization that often doing nothing is the best approach when feeling unwell.

Accepting emotions without trying to problem-solve them can be freeing.

The tendency to problem-solve emotions can perpetuate the problem.

Accepting that feeling anxious or overwhelmed is a natural part of life.

The importance of not changing plans when not feeling well.

The idea that not feeling good is a part of life and should be accepted.

The speaker's belief in living by values rather than emotions.

Setting aside time to feel bad can be a helpful strategy.

Writing down feelings can lead to finding the silver lining in negativity.

The reminder that thoughts and emotions are temporary and will pass.

The concept of not searching for a silver bullet to feeling good.

The necessity of learning to do things even when you don't feel good.

The speaker challenges the idea that productivity is impossible without feeling good.

The video's offer to discuss further on how to get things done when not feeling great.

The anticipation that the speaker will feel better by the next video.

Transcripts

what is up in this video today what i

want to share with you is what i do when

i'm not feeling 100 and how i handle

having um bad days or being in a bad

mood

and this came from a question that um

someone a few different people asked

which is kind of along the lines of like

what do i do when i'm not feeling a

hundred percent and

it's interesting because today for

example i'm

pretty stressed about stuff that's

happening both at work and personally um

i haven't slept well for a few days i'm

in a new apartment um that we just got

and i'm not settled at all yet um and

i'm kind of overstimulated and i feel a

little uh stressed and anxious and i

don't like that feeling at all

and so i felt like it was appropriate to

make this video on the day where i'm not

feeling well

what i have come to realize

is that the answer to what do i do when

i'm not feeling 100

is often nothing i think that's very

unsettling but at the same time i find

it very freeing because i think that

as entrepreneurs and ceos

we're so good at problem solving and so

when we don't feel 100 we want to

problem solve and a lot of the times

this is actually what perpetuates the

problem because almost what you're doing

is you're telling your brain

there's something wrong with feeling

anxious with feeling overwhelmed with

feeling sad instead of just accepting

that emotion

and

not being frightened that you have it

because in some way shape or form i

think anxiety comes from you know it

arises from different things but i think

a lot of the times it comes we almost

make it worse because we get anxiety

about our anxiety we get stressed about

our stress we're like why am i feeling

this way i shouldn't be feeling this way

like i'm the ceo i'm the leader i can't

have a bad day and that's just not true

but what i have come to realize is that

oftentimes doing nothing is the best

approach instead do your best that's

really what i like saying like i'm going

to do my best today i don't feel great i

don't know when it's i don't know when

i'm going to feel better right but i'm

going to do my best today and i'm not

going to change what the plan was

and the reason for that is because like

i said i think that then we train

ourselves either we train ourselves into

um not upholding our values because if

we say every time i feel tired every

time i didn't sleep well every time i

feel sick every time i am overwhelmed i

cancel meetings i don't work out i eat

bad food well that's 50 of life

so your life's not really gonna get

where it needs to go if you just do that

every time you don't feel good right and

you know i think that that's

um one end of the spectrum

the other end of the spectrum is that we

say i don't feel good i'm overwhelmed

i'm anxious i need to fix this right now

you know i need a new routine i need an

infrared sauna i need a cold bath i

needed this i need that and like to an

extent things help right writing things

down can help talking to your friend can

help but when you have to completely

overhaul your life because you know

maybe you've been feeling super anxious

maybe you've had stomachaches maybe you

haven't slept for a few nights like

whatever it may be i don't really think

that means that you need to overhaul

your life i think that maybe

there's things going on and you're just

feeling overwhelmed and that's just a

natural part of life and it's okay not

to feel 100

and so the answer to that question is

really nothing you know i try best to

live by my values and not by my emotions

or how i feel because how i feel changes

all the time and odds are next week or

the week after i will feel 10 times

better than i feel right now and then if

i

cancel everything i don't work out and i

eat badly because i'm not feeling well

now i'm gonna look back later and be

like dang i really wish i hadn't done

that because i kind of set myself back a

little bit and that's okay that happens

we all set ourselves back at times but

if i can catch myself and be aware of it

and not do it then i would rather do

that than the opposite i think that just

understanding and accepting that not

feeling good is a part of life it's a

fact of life like and i think that a lot

of the times if we are

leaders and we put a lot of pressure on

ourselves

for some reason you know we think that

we should also

be the ones who never feel badly right

and that's why that so many people make

money off of like high performance this

high performance that you know all these

things

and i have fallen into that trap as well

but what i've come to realize full

circle is that you just have to accept

that sometimes you feel shitty and

sometimes you get sick and sometimes you

can't sleep and sometimes you have

things in your mind and sometimes you

know you have stomachaches because

you're so stressed and all these things

happen to people and they're completely

normal

and oftentimes our resistance of them

our unwillingness to feel bad is what

perpetuates feeling bad

and so i like to think of it like i have

a feeling it's in my body

i need to let it move through my body

and out

and the way not to do that is by over

compensating for how i feel right now by

eating a ton of food by canceling all my

meetings by watching netflix by

buffering with something like that or by

you know going the opposite direction

and just making myself so busy that i

can't think about anything can't feel

the feeling and the reality is that

feelings are normal and natural and

if your brain knows that you hear the

feeling the signal that is being told

and you allow it to just be there then

your brain probably will stop sending

the feeling to your brain right to you

and that's what i've come to see is to

be true and sometimes it takes a day

sometimes it takes two days three days

four days whatever but it gets through

and eventually you feel differently

and so now when i say that you know i do

nothing

and i accept feeling shitty and i'm like

i'm gonna do what i said i was going to

do regardless of how i feel because

if i

give myself an out every time i feel a

bad way that's

quite a lot of time i'm losing so

instead i have three things that are

kind of like my go-to's when i'm not

feeling too great and it doesn't involve

changing any external circumstances but

it's kind of just like mental management

and so the first thing i usually do is i

just set aside time to feel shitty and

think about how i feel

um usually

i tell myself like i'll go through my

day like today for example i had six

meetings before i filmed this and i have

a break right now i'm gonna film this

and then after this i have like an hour

and so i'm gonna go on a walk and i'm

gonna feel like for like an hour

i'm going to let that happen then your

brain knows it's almost like okay you

have a designated time where you're

going to let yourself feel these

feelings

and for some reason that helps me get

through when i know that like i'm going

to have a time where i can address this

right and so i set aside like 30 minutes

just to think about it allow myself to

feel it or do whatever i need to do like

if you need to cry cry if you need to

scream screams you need to go on a run

go and run whatever it is um i think

setting aside the time to be present

with how you feel and to remember that

it's okay to feel this way it's

completely normal

is the first thing the second thing is

that sometimes um i write it down and so

this could be i'm writing it to a friend

like i'm texting friends being like oh i

feel like today this could be that

i'm writing it down to myself in a note

on my phone this could be i'm writing in

a journal this could be i'm writing it

to a coach you know whatever it is i'm

writing it down and it helps me to be

more objective right and a lot of times

i notice that when i start writing down

why i'm feeling shitty i also start to

find the silver lining because i'm proud

of how i'm handling the situation i'm

like i'm feeling shitty but i'm still

doing everything i said i was going to

do and i'm handling this way better than

i might have a year or two years ago

right and so that's finding the

positivity in the negativity

um

and then the third thing is that i

always remind myself i'm like thoughts

and emotions come and go so the one

thing i can rely on is knowing that they

are unreliable

and so they will come they will go and

eventually i'll feel something else and

i don't need to try and do things to

feel differently right um i just need to

let the emotion pass and it will pass

and i don't need to be scared of it i

don't want to be worried about i don't

need to be anxious about it like we all

have these terrible emotions that make

us feel like a bear is about to eat us

and just because we have those doesn't

mean we need to alter our lives it's

completely normal that is how i show up

when i'm not feeling 100

i think that for me

again this goes back to

living in accordance with your values

rather than obeying your emotions

emotions are often not rational they're

often not

um i don't look into them i'm not like

oh there's some giant deeper meaning

here i need to solve through trauma

therapy like i'm like we all are humans

we all have trauma we all crap it's

happened like

just feeling poopy today is what it is

like i don't need to look into it um

because oftentimes us over analyzing

ourselves and our feelings and emotions

uh perpetuates the cycle of not feeling

well rather than just getting on with

your day and remembering that you can

have a

day where you don't feel well and you're

probably actually still going to have

some times where you do feel good um and

then you'll have times that day where

you feel even worse and eventually it

will change it will pass and you'll have

a good day um and you'll have a string

of good days just like you have strings

and bad days and they're normal

and i think that

if i can give you one thing it is that

you have to stop searching for the

silver bullet to feeling good and you

just have to learn how to do things when

you don't feel good and i think that

oftentimes

i know myself in the past and i'm sure

many people now it's like you just think

well there's no way that if they felt

how i feel they would be able to get

that much stuff done

and i

challenge you on that thought and i

would actually say that they have just

trained themselves to feel absolutely

horrible and still get it done

so if you like this video i will talk

more on how to get things done when you

are not feeling great um and my guess is

that by the next video i make i will

feel much better than this video um so i

hope that this was enlightening and if

so go ahead hit subscribe i will see you

in the next one