NEVER Feel Anxiety Again When Giving A Speech (5 EASY Methods)
Summary
TLDRIn this engaging video, the speaker candidly shares a personal story of a nerve-wracking speaking engagement that went awry due to unmanaged nerves. The narrative pivots to offer practical advice on overcoming stage fright, emphasizing the importance of controlling one's body through techniques like box breathing and managing the mind by adopting a service-oriented mindset. Additional tips include tactical pauses, slowing down speech, engaging in brief exercise to reduce adrenaline, and understanding personal triggers to gradually desensitize fear. The speaker's relatable anecdotes and actionable strategies aim to empower viewers to conquer nervousness in high-stakes situations.
Takeaways
- 😅 The speaker recalls a nerve-wracking speaking engagement early in their career where they sweated excessively due to anxiety.
- 👔 Wearing black clothing was a strategy to hide sweat stains, indicating the physical impact of nerves on the speaker's body.
- 🤝 A CEO's loose handshake and questioning the speaker's experience highlighted the speaker's inner turmoil and lack of confidence.
- 🧘 Controlling the body through techniques like box breathing can help manage nerves by reducing physical trembles that affect the voice.
- 🤯 The speaker emphasizes that the voice trembles due to body tension, suggesting that relaxation techniques are essential for public speaking.
- 💡 Adopting a mindset of service, focusing on the audience rather than oneself, can alleviate self-consciousness and nervousness.
- 📢 Pausing, taking deep breaths, and slowing down speech rate are tactical methods to manage nerves in the moment and prevent a spiral of escalating anxiety.
- 🏃 Engaging in brisk exercise before a speaking event can help dissipate excess adrenaline, thus reducing the physical symptoms of nervousness.
- 🔍 Understanding personal triggers for nervousness is the first step towards managing them effectively.
- 🍽 Desensitizing fear through incremental exposure, like making toasts in casual settings, can build confidence for more significant public speaking engagements.
Q & A
What was the speaker's biggest professional fail?
-The speaker's biggest professional fail was a speaking gig for a Building Association in New South Wales, Sydney, where they were extremely nervous and sweating profusely.
Why did the speaker wear black clothes for their first speaking gig?
-The speaker wore black clothes to hide the sweat stains caused by their nervousness during the presentation.
How did the CEO's reaction affect the speaker after their first speech?
-The CEO's nervous look and loose handshake made the speaker feel even more nervous and sweaty, indicating that their performance might not have been well-received.
What is the first technique the speaker suggests to manage nerves?
-The first technique is to control your body through box breathing, which involves inhaling, holding, exhaling, and holding again for four counts each.
How does controlling the mind help in managing nerves during high-stakes situations?
-Controlling the mind involves adopting a mindset of service, focusing on the audience rather than oneself, which reduces self-consciousness and nervousness.
What tactical move can one use to manage nerves in the moment?
-One can pause, take a deep breath, and significantly slow down their rate of speech to calm down and manage nerves in the moment.
Why does the speaker recommend doing some brisk exercise before a speech?
-Brisk exercise helps to get rid of excess adrenaline, which is released in fight or flight situations and can cause the body to shake.
What is the purpose of understanding and desensitizing your triggers according to the speaker?
-Understanding and desensitizing triggers helps to manage the fear associated with them, such as public speaking, by gradually exposing oneself to similar but less intimidating situations.
How does the speaker suggest practicing public speaking in a casual setting?
-The speaker suggests making toasts at dinner with friends or standing during a Zoom call to practice presenting in a more casual and less intimidating environment.
What is the 'spiral of doom' mentioned by the speaker?
-The 'spiral of doom' refers to the cycle of speaking faster due to nervousness, which in turn makes the speaker feel more nervous, leading to an escalating cycle of increased nervousness and speech speed.
What is the final bonus tip the speaker gives for managing nerves?
-The final bonus tip is to understand what triggers your nervousness and then desensitize it by gradually exposing yourself to similar situations in a controlled and less intimidating manner.
Outlines
😅 Overcoming Nerves: A Public Speaker's Experience
The speaker recounts a nerve-wracking early speaking engagement for a Building Association in Sydney, where they sweated profusely due to anxiety. Despite thinking the presentation went well, the CEO's nervous greeting and loose handshake indicated otherwise. The speaker then shares five strategies for managing nerves in high-stakes situations: controlling body movements to prevent voice trembling, practicing box breathing to calm the body, adopting a mindset of service to focus on the audience rather than oneself, pausing and slowing down speech to counteract the tendency to speak quickly when nervous, and engaging in brief exercise to reduce adrenaline levels. The speaker emphasizes understanding and managing personal triggers to desensitize the fear of public speaking.
🎯 Desensitizing Public Speaking Anxiety
The speaker provides a method to desensitize the fear of public speaking by gradually increasing the comfort level with presenting in front of others. They suggest starting with a small, familiar group, like friends during dinner, and making a toast to practice speaking in public. The speaker encourages standing while delivering the toast to simulate a presentation environment. They also recommend escalating the challenge by standing during a Zoom call or team meeting to further desensitize the fear. The speaker invites the audience to continue learning about public speaking and managing nerves by following a link to the next video, promising valuable insights.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Nerves
💡Box Breathing
💡Mindset of Service
💡Trembling Voice
💡Adrenaline
💡Desensitization
💡High-Stakes Situation
💡Public Speaking
💡Fight or Flight
💡Self-Consciousness
💡Toast
Highlights
The speaker shares a personal story of nervousness during an early speaking engagement.
Wearing black to hide sweat stains due to extreme nervousness.
The CEO's nervous look and loose handshake intensified the speaker's anxiety.
The realization that the speaker 'bombed' the presentation due to unmanaged nerves.
Advice on controlling the body to manage voice trembling during high-stakes situations.
Introduction of 'box breathing' as a technique to calm the body and voice.
The importance of controlling the mind and adopting a service mindset to reduce nervousness.
Tactical advice on pausing and slowing down speech to manage nerves in the moment.
The correlation between fast speech and increased nervousness.
Managing adrenaline through brisk exercise to reduce shakes and nervousness.
Understanding personal triggers as a step towards managing nerves.
Desensitizing fear by practicing public speaking in low-pressure environments.
The concept of making a toast as a method to practice and desensitize public speaking fear.
Standing during video calls as a way to simulate presenting and reduce fear.
Encouragement to continue the learning journey and explore more techniques.
Transcripts
oh I can't believe I'm sharing this this
is my biggest fail as a professional
speaker one of the first speaking gigs I
ever did in my career was for a Building
Association in New South Wales in Sydney
and I remember the first time I did the
speech I was super excited but I was so
nervous inside and I knew that I was
going to be nervous I wore a black shirt
and black pants to hide all the sweat
stains because I was sweating here I was
sweating there I didn't even know I
could sweat here and down here I was
sweating everywhere and I did the
presentation I thought it kind of went
well but I knew deep in my soul that it
was probably bad but as I walked off
stage the CEO was already there to greet
me he had a slight nervous look on his
face which made me feel even more
nervous and then I sweat even more and
then as I went to shake his hand he
shook my hand really Loosely and he
said Vin have you have you done this
before a man saying that gives me the
hey jeebies right now that was one of
the worst experiences of my life I
didn't know how to deal with nerves and
as a result I bombed if I had my time
back here's five things I would have
done to manage those nerves before you
go into a high stake situation you want
to control your body the reason why your
voice is trembling is because your body
is trembling it's not that the voice is
shaking the body is shaking which then
causes the voice to shake I mean try to
hold at your hand like this okay hold
your hand out like this and just hold it
there as still as you can it's pretty
still isn't it yeah it is now I want you
to tense your hand tense it really hard
and when you're tensing it what happens
to your hand when you tense it look I'm
trying to tense it really hard and I'm
like I'm like vibrating right do you
notice that when you're nervous your
body tenses up and when it tenses up it
starts to shake so you want to control
the body and the way you can control the
body is box breathing right Navy Seals
do this the the military use this all
the time and box breathing is you
breathe in for 4 counts you hold for 4
counts you breathe out for 4 counts you
hold for 4 counts try it I'll talk you
through it just try just try it don't
judge it just try it just fully
exhale breathe in for 1 2 3 4 hold 1 2 3
4 breathe out 1 2 3 4 hold 1 2 3
4 how do you feel it's incredible right
it's such a powerful tool that we all
have access to anytime we need it so
when you use something like box
breathing it relaxes your body and when
your body's relaxed your voice is not
going to tremble that's the first thing
you could do that's with your body the
second thing is you want to control your
mind and in your own mind you need to
think to yourself that this high stake
situation that I'm going into this
presentation that I'm walking into this
speech that I'm about to give for my
best friend for at their wedding this
job interview that I'm going into get
into a mindset of service I'm here to
serve the people that are in front of me
it's not about me it's not about me
because if you become really
self-conscious and you keep thinking
about yourself you're going to become
more nervous because you're thinking me
me me me me me me right instead of doing
that think about the audience focus on
the audience and by taking that
self-consciousness taking that
Consciousness away from the self and
placing it on others it starts to reduce
the nervousness as well so you want to
control your body and you want to
control your mind there's a tactical
thing you can do as well if you are in
the moment and you're noticing yourself
getting really worked up and your voice
is trembling well there's one thing you
can do you can pause take a deep breath
and then
significantly slow down your rate of
speech by slowing down your rate of
speech it calms you down and I can tell
you right now that when someone is
nervous one of the most common things
they do is they speak faster because
they want this to be over and done with
so they speak faster and then as a
result they and then the faster you
speak the more you're communicating to
your mind that you are nervous and this
is where that spiral of Doom starts to
happen because the faster you speak the
more nervous you think you are the more
nervous you think you are the faster you
speak and then it's just this terrible
terrible cycle so that's a wonderful
tool to be able to snap you out of that
cycle in the moment manage your
adrenaline adrenaline gets released when
we are in those fight or flight
situations before you go on stage and
deliver if you're starting to feel those
nerves and you're going oh my goodness I
can feel the hands trembling it's not
only because it's tense but because your
body is St to release excessive amounts
of adrenaline to get you ready for fight
or flight now going up and giving a
speech there's no reason to to produce
all that adrenaline you you don't have
to fight anybody you don't have to run
away so you want to get rid of some of
that adrenaline and the way you do that
is a little bit of brisk exercise again
you don't do this in front of everyone
but just out in the hallway just do 10
push-ups or even go for a 5minute brisk
walk by doing that you get rid of all
the excess adrenaline which therefore
will help you manage the shakes the last
bonus one is understand your triggers
understand what triggers you and once
you understand what triggers you you
then can manage it so if you know
precisely that speaking in public is a
trigger even by being able to label it
and by understanding it and by knowing
that makes you nervous that's going to
help already after that then desensitize
it so say for example you know that
speaking in front of 10 people is really
nerve-wracking right he like ah then the
next time you're at dinner with your
friends and there's only two or three
people I mean that's public speaking
right but to just up the ante a little
bit while you're speaking to to your
friends say hey I want to make a toast
this evening and as you're sitting there
by you just saying hey I want to make a
toast this evening all of a sudden now
this changes the frame from this is just
being a conversation but I'm going to
deliver a speech and deliver a 30-second
speech to your friends at dinner three
of them and just go hey I want to make a
toast this evening I want to make a
toast to Great friendships I want to
make a toast to being the the kind of
friend that no matter what time you call
me during the day no matter what time
you call me during the night I'm going
to answer right and and just make a
speech and do a 30C speech and then you
will you'll start to feel that fear
trust me and then do you know what level
two of that is the next time you're with
some different friends stand up and make
a toast don't just sit stand up and make
a toast I already know what some of you
are thinking you're like oh then that's
so weird it's only weird if you make it
weird stand up and say hey I just want
to take a moment to to share my
appreciation for the two of you you know
it's it's and also I'm I'm I'm going to
call this out tonight I'm going to be
paying for dinner so I want to say I
love you I'm grateful for you and here's
to Great friendships do a little toast
sit back down I'm serious because all of
a sudden as you do this you're starting
to desensitize the fear of presenting
right and then you can go to level three
of this and level three of this is when
you're at work next time and you're on a
zoom call stand on the zoom call because
it feels more like you're presenting
when you're in your team meetings and
there's four or five people stand as you
deliver your part of the meeting and
again it's only weird if you make it
weird all you have to if you want to
stand in the team meeting is and it's
your turn to talk you go hey everyone do
you mind if I just quickly stand I need
to stretch my legs I've been sitting all
day do you mind if I stand for this
5minute presentation that I'm about to
do thanks everyone stand and then
deliver it the more you do it the more
you'll desensitize that fear and if you
want to continue The Learning Journey
and go down the rabbit hole with me
click this next video you're going to
love it
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