5 Steps For A Fit Mind... YOU Must Follow: Part 1: English: BK Shivani
Summary
TLDRThis script delves into the concept of emotional fitness, urging individuals to evaluate their dependency on external factors such as people, situations, and material possessions. It highlights the importance of being emotionally independent and the ability to let go, forgive, and stand alone in one's beliefs. The speaker guides the audience through a self-assessment exercise to rate their emotional fitness and encourages them to strive for improvement, aiming for a score of 10 out of 10 by the following year.
Takeaways
- 📱 The impact of minor incidents like a phone falling and getting scratched can vary in how long they bother us, illustrating our different responses to stress.
- 🌟 Our behaviors, thoughts, and vocabularies can be subtly influenced by others without us realizing it.
- 🌧️ We have the power to change our reactions to external factors like weather, despite not being able to change the factors themselves.
- 👥 People respond differently to situations, and even the same person can react differently to the same situation on different days.
- 🔑 It's crucial to recognize that our responses are dependent on our state of mind rather than external circumstances.
- 🗒️ Keeping a diary to track dependencies can help identify what influences our emotional state and work towards independence.
- 🏋️♀️ Emotional fitness can be measured by how little our minds are affected by external events, similar to checking physical fitness.
- 💔 The ability to forgive and let go of past hurts is a key aspect of emotional fitness.
- 🤔 We should be aware of how much we let others' opinions and societal trends dictate our choices and actions.
- 🌐 The world's energy and our personal energy levels are interconnected; we can't remain static, we either grow or decline.
- 📅 Regular self-assessment over time can help track improvements in emotional fitness and personal growth.
Q & A
What is the main theme of the transcript?
-The main theme of the transcript revolves around the concept of emotional fitness, emphasizing the importance of being independent from external influences such as people, situations, and material objects, and learning to manage one's reactions, emotions, and dependencies.
Why does the speaker mention the phone getting a scratch?
-The phone getting a scratch is used as a metaphor to discuss how long one holds on to negative emotions or thoughts. It illustrates the concept of emotional dependency and the ability to let go of such incidents quickly.
What does the speaker suggest as a method to check one's emotional fitness?
-The speaker suggests creating a diary to record and score oneself on various criteria such as dependency on external factors, reactions to situations, ability to forgive, and resistance to peer pressure and people's opinions.
How does the speaker propose to measure one's dependency on external factors?
-The speaker proposes measuring dependency by assigning a score out of 10, with 10 being completely independent. This score helps individuals assess how much they are affected by people, situations, and material possessions.
What is the significance of the speaker's question about the weather?
-The question about the weather is used to illustrate how our emotions can be influenced by external factors and how we can choose to change our reactions to them. It highlights the ability to control our emotional responses rather than being controlled by circumstances.
Why does the speaker emphasize not comparing oneself with others?
-The speaker emphasizes not comparing oneself with others to highlight the importance of making independent choices and not being swayed by societal norms or peer pressure. This is crucial for developing emotional fitness and self-reliance.
What is the purpose of the '2B list' mentioned in the transcript?
-The '2B list' is a personal list where individuals write down situations, people, or things that their mind is dependent on. This list serves as a tool for self-reflection and a way to track progress in reducing emotional dependencies.
How does the speaker define emotional fitness?
-Emotional fitness, as defined by the speaker, is the ability to manage one's emotions, reactions, and dependencies effectively. It involves being less affected by external factors, having a quick recovery from negative emotions, and being able to make independent choices.
What is the role of self-assessment in the speaker's approach to emotional fitness?
-Self-assessment plays a crucial role in the speaker's approach as it allows individuals to objectively evaluate their emotional dependencies and reactions. This self-awareness is essential for personal growth and improving emotional fitness.
Why does the speaker suggest keeping the diary for a year?
-The speaker suggests keeping the diary for a year to track one's emotional progress over time. This practice helps in identifying patterns, recognizing improvements, and setting goals for further development in emotional fitness.
What is the importance of the date mentioned by the speaker?
-The date mentioned by the speaker is significant as it sets a timeline for the individual's self-improvement journey. It marks the beginning of a year-long commitment to work on emotional fitness and provides a reference point for future evaluations.
Outlines
📱 Mindfulness and External Influences
The speaker begins by discussing how minor incidents like a phone falling and getting scratched can preoccupy our minds. They ponder the duration of such concerns and how our reactions to everyday situations are influenced by others, often subtly. The narrative then shifts to introspection about personal habits and choices, questioning how much they are shaped by societal expectations rather than personal desires. The speaker encourages embracing individuality and standing by one's beliefs, even in the face of public opinion. They also touch on the idea that our reactions to situations can vary, suggesting that our state of mind plays a significant role in how we perceive and react to events.
📝 Assessing Emotional Dependency
In this segment, the speaker guides the audience to evaluate their emotional dependencies by creating a list of people, situations, and factors that affect their emotions. They emphasize the importance of recognizing these dependencies to achieve emotional fitness. The speaker suggests using a diary to track these dependencies and to self-assess emotional reactions, such as happiness, stress, and irritation, caused by external factors. The aim is to identify areas where one's emotions are overly dependent on external elements and to work towards achieving a state of emotional independence.
🌟 Scoring Emotional Fitness
The speaker introduces a self-assessment method to measure emotional fitness, focusing on the degree to which one's mind is affected by external factors. They suggest scoring oneself on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 representing complete independence from external influences. The speaker encourages regular self-evaluation to track emotional progress over time. They also discuss the impact of emotions like worry, anxiety, and anger, and the duration for which these emotions linger, advising individuals to score themselves on their ability to let go of such feelings and to forgive others, which are key components of emotional fitness.
🌱 Becoming Independent of External Validation
Here, the speaker delves into the concept of not letting others' opinions dictate one's actions or happiness. They emphasize the importance of making choices based on personal values rather than societal trends or the desire for approval. The speaker encourages developing the strength to stand alone, even when it means going against the crowd. They also discuss the subtle nature of seeking validation and appreciation from others and how this need can undermine one's sense of self-worth. The speaker concludes by asking participants to grade themselves on these criteria to assess their level of emotional fitness.
🔮 Envisioning Future Growth
In the final paragraph, the speaker prompts the audience to reflect on their current emotional state and to envision where they would like to be in a year. They highlight the inevitability of change and the importance of personal growth. The speaker suggests documenting one's current feelings and then, a year later, reflecting on the progress made towards emotional independence. The aim is to recognize how the world's influences can affect one's mind and to work proactively towards maintaining emotional stability amidst life's uncertainties.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Dependency
💡Emotional Fitness
💡Reaction
💡Let Go
💡Forgiveness
💡Influence
💡Comparison
💡Approval
💡Mindfulness
💡Self-assessment
💡Detachment
Highlights
The impact of minor incidents like a phone scratch on our minds and how long they stay with us.
The influence of others on our behavior, choices, and self-perception, and how subtle this influence can be.
The importance of being able to stand alone for what one believes is right, despite societal pressure.
The idea that our reactions to situations and the duration of these reactions can indicate our emotional strength.
How our emotional responses can vary from day to day, even when we are the same person.
The concept that our minds can be dependent on external factors such as people, situations, health, and objects.
The process of self-assessment for emotional fitness by scoring one's reactions and dependencies.
The significance of being able to release and let go of past events and the impact on emotional well-being.
The ability to forgive and not hold onto past hurts as a measure of emotional fitness.
The negative effects of comparing ourselves to others and how it can influence our choices.
The importance of being unaffected by others' opinions and living according to one's own beliefs.
The concept of seeking approval and appreciation from others and its impact on self-worth.
The practice of self-grading for emotional fitness and the importance of periodic self-assessment.
The idea that not making an effort to improve emotional fitness can lead to a decline in emotional strength.
The suggestion to keep a diary to track emotional fitness over time and set goals for improvement.
The reminder that the world's energy and situations can affect our minds if we allow our thoughts to be dependent on them.
The call to action to work on emotional fitness and the potential for significant personal growth over a year.
Transcripts
the phone is there in your hand now it
falls down gets a scratch for how long
does it stay on your mind and these are
simple situations not even a situation
actually so any situation any person's
be for how long so what is my ability to
pack up release and let go the way I
dress up what I eat how I party how I
holiday how I think how I speak my
vocabulary everything how much is it
influenced by people and it's so subtle
sometimes we don't even know it's
influenced it's influenced unaffected
let everybody ridicule
me let everyone say how boring you
are let everyone say how
oldfashioned let everyone say let the
world say it
[Music]
the power to stand alone for what I
believe is right for me wake up in the
morning is said H the weather so
depressive weather is depressive
or weather is what the weather is can I
change the weather no can I change the
way I feel about the weather yes should
I change the way I feel about the
weather why
why should I change what is wrong in
saying the weather is so
depressive because if someone comes and
asks you why are you saying the weather
is depressive you say because it is
depressive that is why I'm saying it's
depressive how is it that the other
people are not finding the same weather
depressive if the weather is depressive
then it's going to cause that depressive
emotion in
everybody if this person is irritated
then that person is going to create
irritation in
everybody if this situation is a crisis
then that situation is going to create
chaos in everyone's mind does that
happen does that happen no do different
people respond differently to situations
yes do same family but different members
respond differently to a
situation the same me
do I respond differently to a situation
on two different
days how does that happen it's the same
me how is it that yesterday I reacted
today I could have done better and
tomorrow I'll probably just let it
go same me not even two different people
same me responding differently on two
different days depending
on depending on
how today I respond differently tomorrow
I respond differently situation is not
the same why is my response different on
two different days depending
on depending on my state of mind that
day so which means it's all dependent
on Rak it all depends on
do because for years I've
said it's always been here like
that and because I kept saying it's
because of them it's because of them
it's because of them it's because of
them I was waiting for everyone to
change one I was waiting for everyone to
change and second I allowed my response
to be dependent on them so if they are
nice to me I
am you're going to fill in the blank if
they are nice to me I'm going to be
happy what are nice to
them so they are nice to me so I'm going
to be nice to them if they are very nice
to me I'm going to be very nice to them
and if they are very very very nice to
me then I'm going to be very very very
nice to them and obviously if they're
not nice to me
what's the rest of the fill in the blank
then why should I be nice to
them and this vocabulary made my mind
completely dependent
on say it because when you say it it'll
get recorded when I say it it's not
going to get
recorded when you say it it will get
recorded by repeatedly saying these
lines
I made my mind dependent
on you all have paper and Pen today now
H CH let's create a short list what all
is my mind dependent
on one is
people and later on when you go home
under the column of people you can write
names
also my mind is dependent on dependent
on means my Happ happiness my
hurt my peace my
stress dependent
on so one is people people is a very big
factor and under people you can write
down
names ah it's a very interesting
list very very interesting list people
then names
our mind could be dependent even on a
stranger a stranger on the road not
driving the right way I create
irritation and I say it's because of
them have never met them might not ever
meet them again but my mind says I'm
irritated because of
them so list of people situations
situations this diary that you have got
today is going to be with you for a long
time and don't use it for anything
else no notes no business notes nothing
no to-do list in this this diary is for
a 2B list not for a to-do list this is
for a 2B list how do I have to be so
write down at any point of time which
are the situations that my mind is
dependent on
anything else situation people
and
H
weather health of the
body health of the
body
objects how many of you are happy
because of your new phone
and then the new phone has the first
scratch oh oh
oh the scratch was only on the glass
screen but where did it
hurt where did it
hurt long list of
dependencies and if my mind is going to
be dependent on objects and on people
and on situations and on the health of
my body and on the weather and all
almost everything then anything which is
so dependent will be
fit will be fit can we call that thing
fit no today if my body is dependent I
can't get up on my own I can't walk on
my own I can't climb steps on my own I
need help for everything it's a sign
that the body is not in its perfect
health but when I need help for
everything that I need to do physically
and if someone says why aren't you able
to do it on your own I said you know
what I'm not
well I say I'm not well I don't say the
steps are
steep I say I am not well and then I
know that when I take care of my body
tomorrow I'll be able to jump up the
steps but when my mind is reacting to
people and situations I am not saying I
am
weak I am saying they are wrong
and because I'm saying they are wrong I
feel they need to change they may change
they may not change that's their choice
but I will allow my mind to go on being
dependent on them and the more the
dependency the more the fitness is going
to
go so next page this page is for adding
the names later
on so we're not writing anything more on
this page next page
in one line you will write the criteria
and then you will give yourself marks
for it we are checking our emotional
Fitness like we do a physical body scan
and then we get a blood report which has
a column normal and my
range and all I have to do is check my
range in reference to the normal range
on the blood report and I would know how
how fit I am so similarly to check my
emotional Fitness levels there should be
some
criteria first
criteria how much is my mind dependent
on the outside
world just write it in short right now
the point is not important be very
detached and give yourself a score out
of
10 10 on 10 means independent
untouched so the more you get
affected by situations by
people you have to rank yourself out of
10 you're not going to give tell this
score to anybody but you need to know it
you need to see it today you need to
check it again next month and then the
month after that and that's how we will
see our emotional Fitness level is
rising but right now score out of
10 my level of
reactions worry anxiety
fear anger irritation hurt
humiliation What's the
magnitude and once created for how long
does that emotion stay
you know for someone you create anger
and then next minute you're
fine you're creating it and it's over
but for someone it can remain internally
for a couple of minutes for some a few
hours so the more the reaction the
weaker I am the longer that reaction
stays the weaker I
am so now rank yourself out of
10 the magnitude and the
duration the extent of the
reaction and the
duration someone said something to me I
created hurt next minute
fine I created hurt and I held on to
that hurt the entire
day I created hurt I held on to it for
an entire
year I created Hur 10 years back and it
is still there on my
mind I still have not forgotten it the
wound is still there so that's the
duration so the longer I'm going to hold
on to
it lower will be my score and it doesn't
matter what the score is because we're
all going to go 10 on 10 so that doesn't
matter this is just to check that this
is the criteria for me to check my stand
my emotional
Fitness next
criteria the ability to release and let
go of things that have happened on the
mind how soon can I pack up and pull a
full stop to my
thoughts it's okay it's
over even as simple
as something
broke just an
object how long does it St stay on your
mind the phone is there in your hand now
it falls down gets a scratch for how
long does it stay on your mind and these
are simple situations not even a
situation
actually so any situation any person's
Beav for how long so what is my ability
to pack up release and let
go grade yourself nobody else is going
to decide whether that grade is more or
less it's only for you detach and rank
yourself because then you're going to
take yourself
higher
third ability to forgive
people forgive
people and forgive means then no
reference to the Past
again it's never going to be brought up
in a conversation it's not even going to
come up on my mind because it's healed
the
wound so grade yourself for that
also no looking at the next person's
score it's of no use and that's the next
criteria how much do I look at other
people in making my
choices
comparison pure pressure whatever may be
the
word doing that what the world is
doing even if it is not the healthiest
option being what people are
today without thinking whether it's
right for me or
not just being or doing because everyone
is doing
it
great the way I dress up what I eat how
I party how I
holiday how I think how I speak my
vocabulary everything how much is it
influenced by people and it's so subtle
sometimes we don't even know it's
influenced it's
influenced and the opposite of that is
the ability to stand alone for the
right the ability to stand alone even if
you're the only
one unaffected let everybody ridicule me
me let everyone say how boring you
are let everyone say how
oldfashioned let everyone say let the
world say
it the power to stand alone for what I
believe is right for me and the last one
for today affected by people's
opinion what people have to say about me
what people have to say to me people
saying I'm good is very important for me
I will do anything for people to like
me I will do anything to please people I
seek
approval it's very subtle I seek
approval I seek appreciation which means
I need it to feel
good I worked
hard I've done
something but that feeling good is still
not there till that is it's very subtle
all these five criteria we've written it
goes deeper and deeper and deeper so
today the score you give yourself
tomorrow you're 10 on 10 you'll check
yourself deeper again it'll go to 5 to
10 because it's deeper the
level so okay everyone's graded
themselves now total out of
10 total out of 10 and don't rank
anybody else in your mind
that is another
criteria sitting here I think of my
spouse oh he should have been here he
should have heard this this like this
this is emot not emotional Fitness he
should have
come my score will get affected if I
think like
that okay now close your eyes everyone
because we don't want you to see other
people's SC everybody eyes shut
now raise your hands 10 on
10 don't open your eyes to see whether
other people raes their
hand
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
two okay we are not going to one
a how many of us want to reach 10 on
10 a how many feel it's possible to
reach 10 on
10
simple and yet do we see that the world
is not making any effort to do
that yes and because we're not making
any effort if I don't make effort to
build up my physical
stamina by itself it will only
start and now
the vibration of the world is such that
you cannot remain where you are in your
energy
level what is the date today 20th June
2024 write the date also on that
notebook all right to 20th June
2024 and just when you go home today
write how you are feeling today General
in life and next page write 20th June
2025
life but keep this diary till
then keep this diary till
then in one year there's a lot that will
happen on this
planet and happening a lot doesn't make
a difference but because the world has
made their mind dependent on situations
so when situations won't be favorable
Minds will also get Disturbed
[Music]
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