How to have HARD CONVERSATIONS with employees. My 6 STEP FORMULA

Summary

In this video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of hard conversations in business, particularly for CEOs and business owners. They share their personal journey, from feeling anxious about such conversations to considering it their most valuable skill. The speaker outlines a framework for conducting these discussions effectively, which includes establishing tone, eliminating assumptions, explaining the goal, detailing the problem's origin, emphasizing the impact, and estimating severity. The video also offers advice on how to handle the conversation, including asking for the other person's thoughts, advising on next steps, agreeing on a plan of action, and assuring them of their standing. The speaker concludes with tips for those who find these conversations challenging, suggesting they write down and rehearse their points, and even record the conversation for self-improvement.

Takeaways

• 😎 Hard conversations are a critical skill for CEOs, business owners, and leaders.
• 🌟 The ability to have difficult discussions is the most valuable skill the speaker possesses.
• 🤔 Having hard conversations is not a natural talent but a skill that can be developed over time.
• 🤝 The speaker's first hard conversation involved firing a friend, which was emotionally challenging.
• 🛑 Short-term discomfort during a hard conversation can prevent long-term harm or dysfunction in a company.
• 🔍 It's important to distinguish between short-term emotional reactions and the long-term benefits of addressing issues.
• 🗣️ The hardest conversations often involve intangibles like attitude or behavior, rather than clear-cut performance issues.
• 📋 The speaker outlines a framework for hard conversations, consisting of 'Six E's' for the initial part and 'Four A's' for the follow-up.
• 🔄 Establishing tone, eliminating assumptions, explaining the goal, explaining the problem origin, emphasizing the impact, and estimating the severity are the 'Six E's.
• 🤝 The 'Four A's involve asking for the other person's thoughts, advising on next steps, agreeing on a plan of action, and assuring them of their standing.
• 🎯 Practicing and rehearsing the conversation framework can lead to more productive and effective hard conversations.

Q & A

What is the main skill Tim Ferriss suggests is essential for business owners and CEOs?

Tim Ferriss suggests that the ability to have hard conversations is the most valuable skill for business owners, CEOs, executives, and operators of a company.

Why does Tim Ferriss believe hard conversations are so important in business?

Tim Ferriss believes hard conversations are important because avoiding them can lead to long-term dysfunction within a company, such as having incompetent staff in roles, poor team dynamics, or cultural disconnects.

How does Tim Ferriss describe the initial experience of having hard conversations?

Tim Ferriss describes the initial experience of having hard conversations as extremely uncomfortable and anxiety-inducing, to the point where he felt physically ill and cried after his first difficult conversation.

What is the 'Six E's' framework mentioned by Tim Ferriss for initiating hard conversations?

The 'Six E's' framework for initiating hard conversations includes: Establish tone, Eliminate assumptions, Explain the goal, Explain the problem origin, Emphasize the impact, and Estimate the severity.

What does Tim Ferriss suggest doing after explaining the issue during a hard conversation?

After explaining the issue, Tim Ferriss suggests asking the person for their thoughts on what has been discussed to gauge their reaction and openness to the conversation.

What is the 'Four A's' framework that Tim Ferriss recommends for the second part of a hard conversation?

The 'Four A's framework includes: Ask for their insight, Advise on what to do next, Agree upon the plan of action and cadence, and Assure them of where they stand.

Why does Tim Ferriss recommend recording hard conversations?

Tim Ferriss recommends recording hard conversations for self-reflection and improvement, similar to how athletes review game tapes, to understand what went well and what needs improvement.

What advice does Tim Ferriss give for those who are anxious about having hard conversations?

Tim Ferriss advises those who are anxious about hard conversations to lengthen the time between thinking about the conversation and having it, to write down and rehearse what they plan to say using the framework, and to record the conversation for feedback.

How does Tim Ferriss view the relationship between communication and business growth?

Tim Ferriss views effective communication as a critical factor for business growth. He believes that most businesses do not grow or fail due to poor communication, which is why he emphasizes the importance of being thoughtful in communication.

What is Tim Ferriss's stance on the natural ability to have hard conversations?

Tim Ferriss asserts that the ability to have hard conversations is not something one is born with naturally. It is a skill that can be developed over time, regardless of one's personality type.