My 3 Biggest Regrets And How They Changed Me
Summary
TLDRIn this reflective video, Rob Chapman discusses his regrets, emphasizing the importance of learning from the past to grow. He recounts his time at the Guitar Institute, where he wishes he had focused more on his studies instead of distractions. Chapman laments not setting clear goals, leading to burnout, and advises on the importance of recognizing achievements to maintain mental health. He warns against engaging with online haters and shares his regret over not moving to America for career opportunities. His story serves as a cautionary tale for aspiring musicians and a reminder to seize opportunities.
Takeaways
- 🎓 Rob Chapman regrets not focusing more on his studies at the Guitar Institute, where he had the opportunity to learn from top guitarists in England.
- 🕒 He advises that time is precious, especially when you have the luxury to learn and grow, and one should make the most of such opportunities.
- 🎯 Rob emphasizes the importance of setting clear and measurable objectives to avoid burnout and to recognize and sustain success.
- 🤯 He shares his experience of panic attacks and mental health issues due to not setting boundaries and constantly chasing more success.
- 🚫 Rob warns against engaging with haters online, explaining that it's a never-ending cycle and that one should focus on positive interactions instead.
- 🌐 He talks about a missed opportunity to move to America for better career prospects in the music industry, highlighting the fear of change as a barrier.
- 🔄 Rob suggests that the anticipation of doing something can be more painful than just doing it, encouraging taking action despite fear.
- 💡 He reflects on the importance of learning from past experiences and regrets to become a better person and to move forward in life.
- 👥 Rob mentions the influence of social life, like girls, parties, and PlayStation, which distracted him from his studies and goals.
- 💼 He shares his post-education experience of working in an optician, which was not his intended career path, highlighting the consequences of not focusing on studies.
- 🌟 Lastly, Rob encourages viewers to learn from his experiences, hoping to help them avoid similar pitfalls and to have a smoother journey in their own lives.
Q & A
What is Rob Chapman's perspective on regrets?
-Rob Chapman believes that looking back at one's history and learning from regrets can make a person better and provide valuable lessons.
Why did Rob Chapman go to London?
-Rob Chapman went to London to study at the guitar Institute, which was the first college-affiliated guitar place offering a degree in guitar playing.
What were some of the distractions Rob Chapman faced while studying at the guitar Institute?
-Rob was distracted by girls, drinking, takeaway food, parties, social groups, and playing PlayStation.
What was Rob Chapman's first regret regarding his time at the guitar Institute?
-His first regret was not focusing enough on his studies and spending more time on leisure activities instead.
How did Rob Chapman's lack of focus impact his immediate future after the guitar Institute?
-After the guitar Institute, Rob had to work in an optician's shop making glasses because he hadn't fully capitalized on his learning opportunities.
What is Rob Chapman's advice on setting objectives in one's career?
-Rob advises setting clearly defined and measurable objectives to know when to sustain a particular level and avoid burnout.
Why does Rob Chapman suggest not interacting with haters?
-Rob believes that haters on the internet are seeking a sense of power and interacting with them fuels their negativity, so it's better to ignore them.
What was the opportunity Rob Chapman regrets not taking?
-Rob regrets not moving to America when he had the chance, as he was scared of the change and the unknown.
How does Rob Chapman feel about his current situation despite his regrets?
-Rob is happy with where he is now, and he has learned from his past experiences and regrets.
What is Rob Chapman's advice for those who receive negative comments online?
-Rob advises not to feed the 'happy wolves' and to focus on the positive interactions, while ignoring or turning a blind eye to the haters.
Outlines
🎸 Reflecting on Regrets and Learning from Mistakes
Rob Chapman opens by discussing the importance of looking back at one's history while staying focused on the present. Initially, he claimed to have no regrets but soon realized that there were things he would have done differently. His first major regret was during his time at the Guitar Institute, where he had the opportunity to learn from top-tier instructors but allowed distractions like partying and socializing to interfere with his studies. He regrets not dedicating enough time to his craft during this period and had to relearn material later while working at an optician's, taking up valuable time he could have utilized better during his studies.
📊 The Importance of Setting Measurable Goals
Rob highlights his second regret, which was not setting clear, measurable goals during his career. He explains how achieving success without acknowledging milestones led to burnout and severe mental health issues, including panic attacks and physical symptoms. He emphasizes the necessity of defining objectives to avoid the constant chase for more, which can lead to serious consequences. He advises others to set goals and recognize their achievements to prevent this cycle of burnout.
🚫 Avoiding Interaction with Online Haters
In this segment, Rob discusses the dangers of engaging with online haters. He initially believed that responding kindly to negative comments would diffuse hostility but soon realized that some people thrive on the power that online negativity provides. He now chooses to focus on interacting with positive, supportive followers and advises others to avoid feeding into the negativity. He acknowledges that with a large audience, there will always be haters, but ignoring them is the best strategy.
🇺🇸 Fear of Change: The Opportunity to Move to America
Rob reflects on an opportunity he passed up to move to America early in his career. He was working with Eddie Kramer, a legendary producer, and had the chance to further establish himself in the U.S. music scene. However, he let fear of the unknown, including a different political and healthcare system, prevent him from making the move. Although content with where he is now, he realizes that putting off major decisions can sometimes be more painful than just taking the plunge.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Regrets
💡Focus
💡Measurable Objectives
💡Mental Health
💡Haters
💡Guitar Institute
💡Success
💡Panic Attacks
💡Opportunity
💡Fear
Highlights
Rob Chapman reflects on how regrets can offer valuable lessons if you learn from them.
At 18, Rob had an incredible opportunity to study at the Guitar Institute in London, but he regrets not focusing enough on his studies.
He discovered distractions like girls, parties, and video games while at the Guitar Institute, which led to him missing out on essential learning moments.
After graduating, Rob had to take up a job as an optician, making glasses, and realized he had not utilized his time at the Guitar Institute fully.
It took Rob a year to catch up on what he should have learned at the Guitar Institute, something he considers one of his biggest regrets.
His second regret is not setting clear, measurable objectives for his career early on, which led to overworking and burnout.
Rob warns that continual chasing of success without recognizing achievements can lead to mental and physical health problems.
He faced panic attacks, heart palpitations, and high levels of stress due to the pressures of his growing career, particularly on YouTube.
Rob’s third regret is interacting with haters online, realizing that it only fuels their behavior. Instead, he now focuses on engaging with positive supporters.
He advises fellow content creators to ignore negativity from online trolls and instead focus on people who bring positivity.
Rob reflects on an opportunity he had to move to America but didn’t, largely due to fear of leaving the familiar for the unknown.
He believes that moving to America at the time would have helped him establish himself better in the music industry.
Rob stresses that putting off big decisions can often be more painful than taking the leap.
Despite his regrets, Rob emphasizes the importance of learning from past mistakes and moving forward.
He hopes to continue learning and improving without facing similar regrets in the future, maintaining a positive outlook.
Transcripts
[Music]
greetings I'm Rob Chapman let's talk
about some things that I regret I think
it's always important to look back at
your history although maintaining a
focus on the now because all we have is
memories now and
Imagination but I think if you can learn
from regrets accept them and then move
forward it makes you a better person and
it gives you lessons that are really
valuable I recently did one of those
Instagram polls where I said ask me
anything am and one of them was any
regrets and I just kind of reflex wrote
nah nothing I regret nothing and then
posted it and I thought actually there
are a few things I would have done
differently when I was 18 I had the
incredible opportunity of going to
London and studying at what was then
called the guitar Institute so the
guitar Institute was the first you know
real um College Affiliated guitar place
where you could go and get you know a
degree in playing the guitar although
actually the degree course launched uh
the month after I finished doing a
one-year diploma and I went to this
place so full of energy and enthusiasm
and passion and the teachers were
unbelievable I had sha Baxter who's if
you if you know you know uh David
kilminster Ian Scott Barry lton I had
the the best of the best in England at
the time teaching me
me uh how to play guitar man it was hard
because I mean I could play but I wasn't
good and I had a lot of bad habits in
particular with the way that I picked
and they turned me from alterate into
economy and hybrid which was a brilliant
Journey anyway at the same time as going
to the guitar Institute I discovered
girls and drink and takeaway food and
parties
and social groups and hanging out and
all this kind of stuff
PlayStation and I wish I had spent more
time focusing on my studies at the
guitar Institute and less time uh
turning up late to class not learning
the live performance Workshop um selling
off bits of gear so I could go to the
Kebab shop or all this stupid stuff that
as a kid you just don't really think
about it's just impulsive you know
reflexive
actions if only I'd spent more time
focusing because when it finished I got
all of the class notes and then I
realized I've got to get a job what am I
going to do and I had to get you know
job in ad Opticians and I was making
glasses I was the guy in the lap coat
manufacturing spectacles and I thought
man this isn't kind of how it was
supposed to pan
out and I got all the notes and I
learned every single note like had a
empty box here box for the night here
and I went on my desk learn that learn
learn learn put it in the empty box and
it took me a year to go through what I
should have learned at college so my
first regret is not focusing enough on
the task at hand when I was when I had
the luxury of time to learn anyone
that's a parent with a job will
understand what I'm talking about being
able to have an hour to yourself to
learn something is a luck y it really is
Regret number
two not setting a clearly defined and
measurable
objective defining making it what is Rob
Chapman going to do what does he want to
do with the
guitar now there's a reason that this is
a problem because if you get some
success and you don't mark it don't
recognize it you are continually chasing
and people that continually Chase burn
out I ended up with panic attacks and
and mental health you know I needed to
take a break man I mean I had heart
palpitations and all sorts of stresses
and
strains um when I was getting sort of
two and a half million views a month
demonstrating for anderton's to man
Guitar
Center you
know this whole journey took its toll
because I didn't recognize the point
when I needed to stop taking on
more and I'm not saying this as a humbl
brag I'm saying it as a warning because
when you when you make money when you
get some successes if you don't
recognize them the ceiling will kill you
it will crush you so it's important to
know how much you want of everything
you're after so that you can say that's
enough and when you reach that that's
enough Point try and stay there don't
continually
hunt um because if you do the downside
is mental health issues which become
physical health issues which result in
all sorts of problems and then you crash
down and then you need to recover before
you can go up again and it's an never
ending cycle so setting those objectives
it's not just like oh it's a fun thing
you should do you should probably write
in a piece of paper I want to sell an
album and I want to tour you really
should do it so that you know when you
get there so that you know when to
sustain a particular level number
three interacting in any way with
haters and let me explain why because
the there were times when I really felt
like I can kill them with kindness you
know I would reply with like listen man
I don't know you you don't know me if we
met at a pub probably we'd just start
chatting and everything would be fine
but because there's you know a screen in
between between us and you think you've
heard something about me that's probably
just made up you you're coming at me
with with an aggressive thing and and
why don't we just chill out and then the
thing is you quickly learn that people
who have a tendency to hate on the
internet um do so because it gives them
a sense of power and they won't stop
doing that because then they lose that
sense of power so it's a NeverEnding in
cycle for somebody who has gone far
enough that they want to aggressively
hate on people on the internet I mean
it's it's an odd thing I often say to my
friends or people that are getting into
YouTube and they ask me for advice I say
let me ask you a question do you ever a
comment on other people's videos and
they and most of them say no I just like
watch the video and and hit a like or if
I do it's like you know something
positive and I say yeah you need to
think about the kind of person who
negatively comments because you don't
know you don't know what they're going
through they might have lost a family
member they might be 5 years old they
they could have any number of issues
going on that you don't understand and
you can't help you can't change any of
that from behind a screen so don't
interact so I feed the happy wolves I
always chat if I can to the nice people
that support and a part of this family
and I just ignore um or what or just you
know turn a blind eye to the people that
hate and you will always always have
haters because in a sea of billions of
people some of them are going to hate
you and that's completely fine man I
mean you know I am a kind of vibe that
some people will like and some people
won't Whatever okay last regret this is
a bit of a weird one but there was a
time in my career where I was given the
opportunity to move to America I was um
doing some work with a guy called Eddie
Kramer who is a phenomenal I mean he was
like a father figure to me producer
engineer for Jimmy hendris Stones Led
Zeppelin did some Beatle stuff what with
Stevi just
mindblowing and I'd recorded with Eddie
uh three times twice at Abby Road once
in North America at Studio there and I
kind of thought I should move to America
and there was an opportunity but I
didn't and I didn't do it because I was
afraid I was scared of moving from
England to a different country you know
different political medical system and
yet the majority of the industry that I
work within is American uh the majority
of people that follow me are Americans
and I think had I moved at that time I
probably would have found it easier to
establish myself as a live player get
more into the session circuit and do a
couple of other things that I kind of
wanted to achieve at the time I didn't
do it because I was afraid and I I I
soon sort of
realized
that how do I put this articulately when
you've got a thing that you you need to
do the putting it off is almost more
painful than the just doing it do you
know what I mean I should just have
moved to America at the time but anyway
I'm very happy where I am now I hope
you've enjoyed this I tried to learn
from all of these uh little issues and
bumps in the road and I hopefully have a
long road ahead of me without bumps have
an amazing day thank you for watching
chap us out
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