How To Be A Closer -- Todd's 3-Step Process
Summary
TLDRThe video script emphasizes the importance of being a 'hard closer' in sales and relationships, advocating for assertiveness without being pushy. It outlines a three-step process: recognizing the necessity of closing, distinguishing between sympathy and empathy to solve problems, and having a strong belief in the value of what you're offering. The speaker uses anecdotes to illustrate the points, highlighting the need for persistence and genuine conviction in one's offerings to achieve success in sales and personal endeavors.
Takeaways
- 😀 The importance of being a 'hard closer' in sales and personal endeavors is emphasized as a critical factor for success.
- 🔍 A surprising statistic is highlighted: most sales calls or interactions do not include an explicit request to buy, yet most sales require at least three attempts to close.
- 🙅♂️ The reluctance to be pushy is common, but the speaker argues that assertiveness is necessary to close deals and achieve goals.
- 🤔 The three-step process for becoming a hard closer is introduced: understanding the necessity of closing, distinguishing between sympathy and empathy, and having a strong belief in the product or oneself.
- 💡 The first step stresses the necessity of asking for what you want, as most people and situations require multiple attempts to secure a 'yes'.
- 🌐 The second step involves understanding the difference between sympathy (joining in the problem) and empathy (solving the problem), advocating for the latter.
- 💪 The third step is about having a strong belief in the value of what you're selling, whether it's a product or oneself, as this belief can influence others' decisions.
- 👥 The script uses examples from both sales and dating to illustrate the principles, showing their applicability in various aspects of life.
- 📉 A cautionary tale from Zig Ziglar is shared, illustrating the negative consequences of not being persistent enough in sales, which can lead to distrust.
- 🤝 The idea that being a hard closer is not about being pushy but about providing value and solving problems for others is reinforced.
- 🚫 The misconception that being 'nice' by not pushing for what you want is beneficial is debunked, with the argument that it can actually be a disservice.
- 💡 The final takeaway is the importance of self-belief and the obligation to be a hard closer when you genuinely believe in the value you bring to the table.
Q & A
What is considered one of the most important factors in success for sales and other endeavors?
-Being a closer, specifically a hard closer, is considered one of the most important factors in success for sales and other endeavors.
Why is it important to ask for what you want, even if it might seem pushy?
-It's important because most sales calls and interactions do not include an explicit request to buy or commit, yet most successful sales and relationships require asking for the order or commitment multiple times.
What is the shocking statistic mentioned about sales calls?
-The shocking statistic is that in most sales calls, no one explicitly asks the customer to buy anything, yet they are there with the intent to sell.
What is the recommended approach to overcome objections in sales or dating?
-The recommended approach is to ask for the order or commitment multiple times, possibly in different ways, and to present it in a way that addresses the objections or concerns raised.
What is the difference between sympathy and empathy in the context of sales and problem-solving?
-Sympathy is understanding and sharing someone's situation, often to the point of giving up. Empathy is understanding the situation and actively trying to help the person solve their problem.
Why is it detrimental to adopt a sympathetic approach instead of an empathetic one?
-Adopting a sympathetic approach can make the salesperson or problem-solver part of the problem, leading to giving up. An empathetic approach helps find solutions and is more likely to result in a successful outcome.
What is the importance of having a strong belief in the product or service you are selling?
-Having a strong belief in the product or service conveys confidence and sincerity to the customer, which can be more persuasive than knowing all the sales techniques but lacking conviction.
What lesson can be learned from the story about Zig Ziglar and the man who wanted indoor plumbing?
-The lesson is that not being a hard closer can lead to distrust. Ziglar's decision to back off made the man think that he was either lying about the value of the product or not genuinely committed to helping him make the right decision.
How does the concept of being a hard closer relate to dating and relationships?
-In dating, being a hard closer means being assertive and persistent in expressing interest and desire for a relationship, which is often necessary because many people need to be asked multiple times before they agree to a relationship.
What is the potential downside of not being a hard closer in both sales and dating?
-The potential downside is that by not being assertive and pushing for the sale or relationship, you may be depriving the other party of the value you can offer, and they may end up choosing someone less suitable.
Why is it crucial to believe in oneself and one's offerings in the context of being a hard closer?
-Believing in oneself and one's offerings is crucial because it shows commitment and genuine care for the other party's well-being. If you believe you are a good deal or that your product offers value, you have an obligation to be a hard closer to ensure the other party receives that value.
Outlines
🚀 The Art of Being a Hard Closer
The first paragraph emphasizes the critical role of being a 'hard closer' in achieving success in sales and other areas of life. It presents a three-step process to effectively close deals without being pushy. The first step is recognizing the necessity of closing, supported by a statistic that most sales calls lack an explicit attempt to close a sale. The speaker argues that assertiveness is often missing in people's approach to sales and relationships. The second step is to understand the importance of empathy over sympathy when dealing with objections, suggesting that one should aim to solve the problem rather than becoming part of it. The third step is not explicitly mentioned in the paragraph, but it sets the stage for a deeper dive into the process of closing.
🤝 Empathy vs. Sympathy in Sales and Relationships
The second paragraph delves into the distinction between empathy and sympathy, illustrating their impact on sales and personal relationships. Empathy is positioned as the ability to understand and help others through their issues, while sympathy is portrayed as merely sharing their plight without offering solutions. The speaker uses examples from sales scenarios and dating to highlight the importance of being a problem solver rather than part of the problem. The paragraph also touches on the concept of 'strong belief in products' as a key to successful sales, suggesting that genuine belief in what one is selling can be more persuasive than technical sales skills.
🔑 The Power of Belief and Commitment in Closing
The third paragraph concludes the video script by stressing the importance of having a strong belief in oneself and one's offerings, whether in sales or dating. It discusses the consequences of not being a hard closer, suggesting that by not pushing for what one wants, one may inadvertently be doing a disservice to the other party by depriving them of potential value. The speaker uses a story about Zig Ziglar to illustrate how not pushing hard enough can lead to distrust and dislike. The paragraph reinforces the idea that believing in oneself and one's product is essential to being an effective closer and that this belief can outweigh technical mistakes in the process of closing.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Closer
💡Assertiveness
💡Sympathy
💡Empathy
💡Sales Techniques
💡Belief in the Product
💡Nice Guy
💡Objections
💡Investment
💡Value
Highlights
The importance of being a 'hard closer' in sales and other areas of life.
Most people are not naturally assertive, which can hinder success in sales and relationships.
The necessity of asking for what you want and potentially pushing for it in sales and dating.
A surprising statistic: most sales calls do not include an explicit ask to buy.
The common pattern that sales are often made after at least three attempts to close.
The need for assertiveness in asking for a raise or other desired outcomes in life.
The concept of 'sympathy' versus 'empathy' and their roles in sales and problem-solving.
Sympathy can make a salesperson part of the problem, while empathy helps find solutions.
The value of having a strong belief in the product or service being sold.
New salespeople often outperform experienced ones due to their belief in the product.
The story of Zig Ziglar and the lesson on the importance of persistence in sales.
How backing down can lead to distrust and the perception of insincerity.
The parallel between sales techniques and dating strategies, emphasizing the need for persistence.
The misconception that being 'nice' and not pushy is always beneficial in dating.
The obligation to be a hard closer if you believe in the value you bring to a relationship.
The final message on the critical nature of belief and persistence in achieving success.
Transcripts
I want to talk to you about one of the
most important factors in success for a
game and for actually any endeavor
relating to sales okay and that is being
a closer and beyond that even being a
hard closer because most people that do
sales that do game they're naturally not
as served to be fair most people in life
are not overly assertive but the fact of
the matter is in order to close a sale
in order to sleep with a girl usually
you do have to ask for the order you do
have to ask for what you want and maybe
even push for what you want a little bit
but nobody wants to be pushy nobody
wants to be that annoying so how
do you become a hard closer without
becoming that pushy
well I'm gonna give you a three step
process first step is this realize that
closing is necessary all right here's
the shocking statistic most sales calls
ie a Salesman is sitting down with
someone who has agreed to look at
something with the idea of buying most
sales calls and without anyone asking
anyone to buy anything okay as in two
people sat down with the express intent
that something was to be sold and nobody
said hey would you like to buy that hey
do you like that in red or blue nobody
said it or you go on a date and nobody
said or you talk to a girl you don't say
hey what's your number let's hang out
are you going to date you don't say hey
you know what you want to continue this
somewhere more comfortable you don't do
anything okay
most sales calls most dates most
interactions with attractive women and
without any attempt to close now the
weird converse of that is and I don't
know the exact statistic on this to hurt
it years ago for sales I think most
sales are made after at least three
attempts to close as in it you've asked
for the order at least three times it's
probably similar in game right you know
you hint it may be going somewhere she's
a little objection you sell it a little
bit and then later on you bring it up
and she's like yeah sure right most
times you have to ask multiple times
maybe in different ways maybe you have
to present it the right way this can
grow up for her okay so in sales in
endgame almost nobody asks for the order
yet when there's a success
the order is asked for at least three
times if not more do you see that sort
of like split this is one of the biggest
reasons white guys don't get results
it's one of the biggest reasons in in
business and sales and whatever you're
doing in your life financially you're
not getting results right even if you're
working a corporate job are you asking
your boss for a raise right have you
bothered to ask for that order right
people aren't assertive people don't ask
for what they want and especially with
women people don't ask for what they
want okay so you need to be asking for
what you want so I want to impress upon
you the importance okay so that's step
one is understand how incredibly
important this is to your success at
life your success with women it is one
of it might be the most important factor
but it's certainly one of the top five
factors that's going to be influencing
your success in life so this is
important okay I understand that
importance that's step one step two
understand the dentistry what I call
sympathy and empathy
okay now sympathy and empathy both
relates to understanding what someone
else is going through understanding
someone else's situation sympathy is
where you get on board and become a part
of their situation empathy is where you
understand their situation and you try
and help them through it okay so in a
sales situation if someone says you know
I just don't have the money for it
sympathy would be like yeah you know
it's expensive never mind I'll go and
you just give up and say oh they don't
have the money okay fine I won't try and
sell it to them I don't want to be pushy
right so with sympathy and the client
has a problem
the salesman makes that their problem -
okay or for example with girls I'm she's
like oh you don't have to go home with
my friends so Yoshi has to go home with
her friends okay this isn't gonna happen
and just gives up instead of trying to
solve the problem he makes it his
problem as well okay empathy would be if
you try and solve the problem so let's
look at the same cases in the sales
example oh you don't have enough money
for it well you know we have several
payment plans if you'd like to install
it this way or can you see how this
investment will actually save you money
in the long run etc etc all right so
those may be the sales solutions the
gross solution when she says you know I
got to go home with my friends instead
of thinking oh she has to go home
with her friends isn't gonna go
think to yourself well she wants to go
with me she has this issue which is the
friends how can I solve it they go did
you did you drive with them where they
come from hey I'm going this way I can
drive you home hey go home with your
friends call me after there's a lot of
different solutions and that are
possible but someone with sympathy
automatically gives up or automatically
makes himself part of their problem
makes the problem worse by buying into
it someone with empathy says oh here's
their situation how do I help them
through it how do I help them solve it
and believe you may people in life they
need friends lovers salespeople that
have empathy they need problem solvers
in their life people have lots of
problems if you're the person that's
creative with empathy and can solve the
problem people are going to love you
people are gonna be closed by you both
for sex and for sales
okay so sympathy versus empathy don't
have sympathy have empathy okay don't
become part of the problem become the
solution the problem by all means listen
by all means understand what the
person's going through and relates but
then become part of the solution okay so
that's step 2 right again step 1
understand how important it is to be a
closure step 2 understand your swings
sympathy becoming the problem empathy
solving the problem okay part 3 is what
I call strong belief in products okay
and what I mean by this will go through
a sales example again here people in
sales who know all the sales techniques
and know all the lines do pretty well
Joon who does even better than them
someone who absolutely believes them
what they're selling and believes
everyone in the world should have it
it's so common that you have like maybe
a sales force you have your experienced
sales people you have someone new come
in and they just came out of training
they're excited they're jazzed about the
product and they sell sell sell sell
sell like crazy because they just
believe this product is the greatest
thing that's ever been invented and
everyone needs one and they might mess
up the clothes and then it'd mess up
their presentation they might not know
all the sales techniques but the person
talking them can tell they believe in it
and that comes through alright and then
over time a lot of those people actually
they lose that enthusiasm in their sales
actually go down even as they're
learning sales techniques pretty crazy
right and some people keep it and become
great salesmen okay it's the same thing
in game it's the same thing with girls
do you believe in your
product which in this case is you do you
believe that you are a good thing for
the girl all right it's absolutely
essential that you do and here's the
thing if you believe that you're a good
deal for the girl you also should
believe that you owe it to them to be a
hard closer and you owe it to them to be
a little bit pushy in order to
illustrate this last point I want to
share with you a story from someone
named Zig Ziglar is out now deceased but
he was one of the greatest sales
trainers and greatest motivational
speakers of all time this came from his
early days of the Salesman he is in the
rural South in the town where everybody
knew everybody is selling coke we're
basically pots and pans I'm in this
small town so he had to sit he was
sitting down with someone trying to sell
him some pots and pans and at the end of
the the kind of meeting the guy said
look I got your money right here for
those pots and pans and you're not
getting it because I've been saving up
for years to get indoor plumbing for my
families who won't have to go to that
outhouse and I got the money and that's
what it's going for you ain't getting it
and Zig Ziglar at the time he'd grown up
in in a house where he didn't have
indoor plumbing as well and he
definitely sympathized rather than
empathizing with the guy and he's like
yeah I understand I get it and he just
you know called the sales called left
without trying much harder walked away
didn't sell him any pots and pans about
a week or so later he's talking to a
relative of this guy and she's like you
know my cousin it says he hates you and
takes like why would he hate me I'm a
nice guy it's like she says you wouldn't
sell him any cookware and sings like I
tried really hard to sell him some
cookware in fact if you want to you know
go let's go find him right now I'll sell
him some cookware right now and she said
it's too late he doesn't trust you
anymore
and Zig Ziglar said he was baffled by
this like completely confused didn't get
it at that stage in his sales curve but
as he grew up as a salesman learns the
sales process it started to make sense
to him and here's what he says happened
basically he had convinced the man that
he was trying to sell the cookware that
it was a good investment for him that it
would help him that he needed it that it
would save him money all those kind of
things and then he got a little bit of
objection and he quit and so at that
moment the guy had to think to himself
either wet wait was dig lying to me the
whole time and that's why he gave up so
easily or was he telling me the truth
and this would have been good for me
and he didn't fight for me he didn't
fight to make sure I made the right
decision
and so the fact that Zig Ziglar didn't
push hard the fact that Ziegler was the
nice guy and backed off actually made
the guy distrust him and disliked him as
opposed to making him like him that's a
very very interesting thing to consider
okay
and as you consider that I wanted from a
dating perspective give you this kind of
thought a lot of guys aren't pushy with
girls because they want to be nice they
want to be the nice guy who's not pushy
right but the fact of the matter same as
in sales in dating most girls need to be
asked a few times before they say yes so
if you as the nice guy who cares about
her interests don't push and she needs a
guy who will push in order to sleep with
him well that means the guy she's gonna
sleep with will be the that
don't care about her interests so when
you back down being the nice guy and
think you're doing her a service where
you're doing is a disservice because
you're saying you're basically
consigning her that she has to have
boyfriend's so you think you're
being nice but you're not and again it
all comes full circle to believing in
yourself if you believe that you're a
good deal if you believe that you're
right for you believe you're gonna be a
good boyfriend bring the value to the
relationship then you have an obligation
right not just not just a privilege an
obligation to be a hard closer if you
care about the person you're talking to
because if you have all this to a value
to offer and you're not a hard closer
you're depriving them of that value and
you're consigning them to being with a
much worse person all right so just to
recap it's so so so critical to your
results in sales and women in life to be
a hard closer because most situations
require you to ask for the sale ask for
the order multiple times number two
understand the difference between
sympathy and empathy are you part of the
problem or you're part of the solution
number three understand that everything
comes down to your belief people can
read off you how committed you are and
how much you believe you're a good deal
or your products a good deal and if you
believe it even if you do a lot of
things wrong they're probably gonna buy
in if you don't believe it people are
gonna see right through you and they're
not gonna go with it all right so that's
how and that's why to become a hard
closer even if you are a nice guy
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