Thomas Kilmann
Summary
TLDRThe video script explores the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument, which assesses responses to conflict during change. It introduces five conflict-handling styles: competing, accommodating, collaborating, avoiding, and compromising, each with its pros and cons. The script uses dialogue to illustrate these styles, emphasizing the importance of adaptability and understanding the impact of one's approach on communication and outcomes in a changing environment.
Takeaways
- 😀 Conflict is a natural part of change, often arising from differing goals and desires among individuals.
- 📊 The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument helps to understand how people react during times of change through five basic conflict-handling styles.
- 🔍 Two key concepts in conflict resolution are 'cooperativeness', which is the willingness to meet others' needs, and 'assertiveness', which is the desire to meet one's own needs.
- 📚 The Thomas-Kilmann grid is a visual tool that maps out conflict styles based on the axes of assertiveness and cooperativeness.
- 🤝 The 'Competing' style is highly assertive but not cooperative, beneficial for quickly making a point but can lead to being seen as unapproachable.
- 🙌 'Accommodating' is highly cooperative but not assertive, acting as a peacekeeper but risking being overlooked or undervalued.
- 🤔 'Avoiding' is low on both assertiveness and cooperativeness, allowing one to step back from conflict, but may be seen as evasive or non-confrontational.
- 🤝 'Collaborating' is high on both assertiveness and cooperativeness, ensuring everyone's voice is heard but can be time-consuming.
- 🤝 'Compromising' balances assertiveness and cooperativeness, offering a middle ground but may appear as a negotiation tactic if overused.
- 🔄 The script emphasizes the importance of adapting between these styles depending on the situation to effectively navigate conflicts.
- 👥 The dialogues in the script illustrate how different conflict styles manifest in real-life interactions and decision-making.
Q & A
What is the purpose of discussing the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument in the context of change?
-The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument is discussed in the context of change to understand how people react during times of change. Conflict is inherent in change, and the instrument helps identify the different styles people use to handle conflicts, which can arise due to differing interests and goals during change processes.
What are the two key concepts introduced in the Thomas-Kilmann model?
-The two key concepts introduced are 'cooperativeness' and 'assertiveness'. Cooperativeness refers to the willingness to meet others' needs, while assertiveness is about the desire to meet one's own needs.
How is assertiveness defined in the Thomas-Kilmann model?
-Assertiveness in the Thomas-Kilmann model is defined as the degree to which an individual is likely to meet their own needs. It ranges from low assertiveness, where an individual is less likely to meet their own needs, to high assertiveness, where they are very likely to do so.
What does cooperativeness represent in the context of the Thomas-Kilmann model?
-Cooperativeness in the Thomas-Kilmann model represents the degree to which an individual is willing to meet the needs of others. It ranges from low cooperativeness, where an individual may not be willing to meet others' needs, to high cooperativeness, where they actively seek to do so.
Can you describe the 'Competing' style in the Thomas-Kilmann model?
-The 'Competing' style is characterized by high assertiveness and low cooperativeness. It is beneficial when one needs to get their point across quickly and protect their interests. However, it can be detrimental if overused, as it may lead others to perceive the individual as uncooperative and unapproachable.
What are the advantages of the 'Accommodating' style according to the script?
-The 'Accommodating' style, which is high in cooperativeness and low in assertiveness, is advantageous because it helps to smooth over conflicts and facilitate cooperation. It allows the individual to be seen as supportive and helpful in achieving group goals.
What could be a potential downside of consistently using the 'Accommodating' style?
-A potential downside of consistently using the 'Accommodating' style is that the individual may become overlooked or undervalued, essentially becoming a 'doormat' where their own needs are consistently set aside and not addressed.
What is the 'Collaborating' style and its potential drawback as mentioned in the script?
-The 'Collaborating' style is characterized by high levels of both assertiveness and cooperativeness. It involves taking time to hear from everyone and aims to find a solution where all parties' needs are met. The potential drawback is that it can be time-consuming, which may not be feasible in situations requiring quick decisions.
How is the 'Avoiding' style described in the script, and what is its potential benefit?
-The 'Avoiding' style is described as low in both assertiveness and cooperativeness. It involves stepping back from conflict when it is not seen as worth engaging in. The potential benefit is that it allows the individual to avoid unnecessary conflicts and focus on more important issues.
What is the 'Compromising' style and its main advantage?
-The 'Compromising' style is moderate in both assertiveness and cooperativeness, aiming for a 50/50 balance where both parties give and take. Its main advantage is that it allows for quick resolution of conflicts through mutual agreement, and it is flexible as it can adapt to other styles when needed.
What is a potential issue with relying solely on the 'Compromising' style as per the script?
-Relying solely on the 'Compromising' style could lead to a perception of gamesmanship, where every interaction becomes a negotiation, potentially undermining the authenticity of the collaborative process.
Outlines
🤝 Understanding the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Grid
This paragraph introduces the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument, emphasizing its importance during times of change. It explains the concepts of 'cooperativeness' and 'assertiveness' as key to understanding how individuals react to change. The Thomas-Kilmann grid is described with two axes representing these concepts, with varying levels of each. The speaker plans to demonstrate the grid with a colleague, Damian, to explore the five conflict-handling styles: competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding, and accommodating. The paragraph also includes role-play scenarios to illustrate how different styles might respond to a change initiative, showing the competing style as assertive but not cooperative, the accommodating style as cooperative but not assertive, and hints at other styles through dialogue.
🤔 Exploring the Pros and Cons of Conflict Styles
The second paragraph delves into the advantages and disadvantages of each conflict-handling style as identified by the Thomas-Kilmann model. The 'competing' style is described as assertive but not cooperative, beneficial for quickly getting one's point across and protecting interests, but potentially alienating if overused. The 'accommodating' style is cooperative but not assertive, acting as a mediator but risking being overlooked if consistently prioritizing others' needs. 'Collaborating' is both assertive and cooperative, ensuring all voices are heard, but it can be time-consuming. 'Avoiding' is low on both assertiveness and cooperativeness, allowing one to step back from conflict, which can be beneficial for avoiding unnecessary battles but may also be seen as evasive. Lastly, 'compromising' balances assertiveness and cooperativeness, offering a middle ground where both parties gain and concede, but overuse may lead to a perception of constant negotiation. The paragraph concludes by highlighting the adaptability of the compromising style, being one step away from all other styles.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI)
💡Change
💡Cooperativeness
💡Assertiveness
💡Competing
💡Accommodating
💡Collaborating
💡Avoiding
💡Compromising
💡Conflict
Highlights
Introduction to the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument for understanding reactions during change.
Importance of conflict in times of change due to differing desires and goals.
Definition of cooperativeness as readiness to meet others' needs.
Definition of assertiveness as the desire to meet one's own needs.
Visualization of assertiveness and cooperativeness on the Thomas-Kilmann grid.
Demonstration of the Thomas-Kilmann grid with a colleague.
Five basic conflict handling styles: competing, accommodating, collaborating, avoiding, and compromising.
Example dialogues illustrating each conflict style.
Pros and cons of the competing style: assertiveness but potential for alienation.
Pros and cons of the accommodating style: cooperativeness but risk of being overlooked.
Pros and cons of the collaborating style: balanced assertiveness and cooperativeness but time-consuming.
Pros and cons of the avoiding style: conflict avoidance but may lead to unresolved issues.
Pros and cons of the compromising style: middle ground but can appear as deal-making.
Adaptability of the compromising style to other conflict handling styles.
The necessity of using a combination of conflict styles depending on the situation.
Practical application of the Thomas-Kilmann grid in a workplace change initiative scenario.
Discussion on the importance of understanding and adapting conflict handling styles for effective communication and collaboration.
Conclusion summarizing the key points of the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument.
Transcripts
so now that you filled out your Thomas
kilman conflict grid let's talk about it
conflict is important in times of change
actually by the very nature of change
because of change what you want in your
change maybe over here and what other
people have been doing or what they want
may be over here and you may be pulling
at each other because you don't want the
same thing so Thomas kilman is an
interesting way for to look at how
people react in times of change and
there are five basic Styles we're going
to look at before we do that it's
important to know two new words one is
cooperativeness and the other is
assertiveness cooperativeness is
actually how you are ready to meet other
people's needs and assertiveness is
actually how much you want to meet your
own needs and let me show you this now
on the Thomas kilman
grid along this
AIS we have assertiveness lower
assertive
less likely to meet my own needs and
highly assertive very likely to meet my
own needs along the bottom we have
cooperativeness which is actually
meeting other people's needs at this end
of the grid we have higher
cooperativeness which means I really
want to meet your needs and maybe put my
needs aside and at this end of the grid
we have somebody who might not want to
meet their own needs or other people's
needs and we're going to De discover
that style now
so now that we've talked about the
basics of the Thomas kilman grid let's
Discover it on a human size and to do
that in a moment I'm going to ask my
colleague Damian to come demonstrate
this with me and before we do that let's
place the two words where they belong
first of all along the axis at the
bottom we're going to place the word
cooperativeness meaning at this end of
this style we have less Cooperative
behavior and at this end of the style we
have more Cooperative
behavior and along this side we're going
to place the word assertiveness meaning
that at this end of the scale we have
less concern for yourself and at this
end of the scale we have more concern
for
yourself hey Robert what you think of
the change initiative you call that a
change initiative I tell you what I'm
not ready to roll that out because I say
it's not good for our people it's not
good for the company and you need to go
back and figure out what it is you want
to do here I say no to that project and
I say no right now I think we need to
stop this project now
hey Robert what do you think of the
change initiative ah the change
initiative well I mean it's okay I
personally would have done a little bit
differently because I I think we could
do it differently and you know at the
end of the day it's it's not really so
much about what I want I need to put
that aside it's really what the company
wants us to roll out I really think we
could do it differently though and again
that's just my
opinion hey Robert what do you think of
the change initiative wow I think it's
really interesting I think it's great
and you're kind of an expert on this
aren't you well I'm yeah a bit of an
expert well I tell you what let's have a
team meeting I was thinking next week we
had everybody around the table and let's
take half a date no let's take like five
six hours so everybody has a chance to
share their point of view could you do
that possibly let's talk about it yeah
let's do a holiday meeting
okay hey Robert what do you think about
the change initiative H Damian did you
used to wear glasses Once Upon a Time oh
I knew something had changed about you
and robt really do want to talk to you
about the change initiative so what do
you think I just don't think now is the
time to talk about that you know what I
say I say let's come back to it when
things have calmed down could I get back
to you say I don't know the end of next
quarter I mean now is the time to talk
about it o I don't know I say Let It
Go hey Robert what do you think of the
change initiative interesting and I was
wondering if you got my email the one I
sent you a few minutes ago with some of
the stuff we need yeah no I did I did
and I particularly like the resource
sharing idea you had where we had you
know some of my people do some of your
work that that that had some Merit in my
world yeah and I what I say is let's
just split this thing 50/50 you'll get
part of what you want I'll take the
other thing that I need and we'll just
go down the middle with it well that
sounds possible I'd like to talk it
through a little bit more detail but in
principle that sounds like a reasonable
compromise great let's do
that so Robert Let's Take One More tour
around this kilman grid and this time
I'd just like you to explain to us the
pros and cons of each particular style
so we're now in the competing grid what
are the pros and cons well the comp
competing grid is highly assertive not
very cooperative and the benefit to the
competing grid is when you're competing
is you get your point across quickly and
you tell people what you want the other
benefit is that you can actually protect
and stand up for the things that are
right and that you think need protecting
the potential downfall of this though is
if you only ever compete people may not
want to talk to you because they'll see
you as a cold jerk that doesn't deserve
talking
to let's grab it here a little bit okay
this is the accommodating Style so pros
and cons of accommodating accommodating
is another wonderful style it's highly
cooperative and not very assertive and
the nice thing about accommodating is
that you actually you're the oil that
Smooths over the water you're the person
at that meeting that that helps get
things done it's a very smooth style
over the rough times the problem with
accommodating is if you only do this you
become kind of like the doormat of the
league and you need to leave your
concerns aside and you're never heard by
anybody so where to you next well let's
go up to collaborating so same question
here pros and cons are collaborating
well collaborating is highly assertive
highly cooperative and what you're doing
up here is you're actually taking the
time to hear from everybody and the
benefit is that people are heard the
downfall of this style and the
significant downfall of this style is
that it takes time and if you don't have
time you need to use a more competing
style to get the point across so what
are we go over to this one over here
which I know is the avoiding style and
um I must say I'm struggling to see the
benefits of avoiding right A lot of
people say they avoiding they're like
not happy to be an avoiding a avoiding
is a wonderful style because it's low on
assertiveness low on cooperativeness
what it means is that you can actually
make a decision you can see the bullet
coming and you can take a step back and
say do I want to fight that battle right
now and if you do you step into another
box and if you don't you take a step
back and you let it
go and finally what do we have here in
the middle we have Cooper we have uh
compromise and compromise is actually
5050 in the middle of everything
assertiveness and cooperativeness and it
means you get something and it means you
give up something at the same time and
this benefit here is you can do that the
problem though is if you only do
compromise you're going to look like
let's make a deal gamesmanship I gave
you this you gave me that now it's time
for this so you're going to want to do
this
and know that you need to use some of
the other Styles as well the other
benefit to this style is you're only one
step away from all the other boxes so
you can always adapt to everything
else and that's Thomas kilman thank you
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