what women actually find attractive

Summary

This video script explores the misconceptions men have about what women find attractive. It emphasizes the importance of storytelling in the 'female gaze' and acknowledges the variance in women's preferences. The script corrects the 'black pill' notion of needing to be tall, rich, and fit, highlighting that women value personality traits like confidence and charisma over looks. It also discusses the dynamic nature of attraction and the importance of finding a niche rather than trying to appeal to everyone. The video concludes by advising men to focus on being authentic and embodying positive qualities rather than changing themselves to fit unrealistic standards.

Takeaways

• 🔍 The biggest mistake men make when trying to become more attractive to women is approaching it from the male perspective rather than the female perspective.
• 📚 Women are often attracted to a variety of traits, and their preferences can vary widely. It's not just about looks; it's about the story you present.
• 🎨 The female gaze is story-driven. Women appreciate creativity and the stories men tell through their appearance and behavior.
• 👀 Looks do matter, but women have a wide range of preferences. Idealized standards like Cristiano Ronaldo or Chris Hemsworth represent only a fraction of what women find attractive.
• 💡 The black pill antidote: Women value much more than physical appearance. Humor, voice, charisma, and other traits play a significant role in attraction.
• 📈 The female gaze is dynamic. Physical attraction can grow as women get to know a man's personality and other traits.
• 🔺 Height, income, and status are relative. Women often prefer men who are slightly taller and earn slightly more, but these preferences are relative rather than absolute.
• 🏆 Focus on niche maxing rather than wide appeal. Men should thrive in areas they are passionate about and find partners with similar interests.
• 🚫 Women don't like nice guys who come off as weak or desperate. Confidence, social skills, and standing up for oneself are attractive traits.
• 💪 Traits behind being a bad boy, like confidence and leadership, are what make them attractive, not the bad behavior itself. Men should focus on developing these underlying qualities.

Q & A

What is the main mistake men make when trying to become more attractive to women according to the script?

Men often try to become more attractive through the perspective of the male gaze instead of the female gaze, attempting to reduce attraction to a scientific formula rather than understanding the variance and complexity of what women find attractive.

Why is the term 'female gaze' used in the script to describe how women perceive attractiveness?

The term 'female gaze' is used to highlight the idea that women's perception of attractiveness is story-driven and nuanced, focusing on more than just physical appearance, similar to how they engage with romance novels and art.

What does the script suggest about the importance of storytelling in women's perception of attractiveness?

The script suggests that storytelling is crucial in women's perception of attractiveness because it allows them to connect with a person's personality, style, and body language, which all contribute to the narrative a person presents when they interact with the world.

What are some physical features that women might find attractive according to the script?

Women might find features such as a nice jawline, slight facial hair, height, a lean physique, darker features, and a mix of masculine and feminine traits attractive, as exemplified by public figures like Cristiano Ronaldo or Michelle from the film '365 Days'.

How does the script address the idea that women have a type but are not limited to it?

The script acknowledges that while women may have a preference or 'type,' this does not mean they are automatically rejecting others who do not fit this type. It emphasizes the importance of individual preferences and the reality that attraction can vary greatly.

What does the script refer to as the 'black pill' antidote?

The 'black pill' antidote refers to the realization that women do not view male attractiveness purely in terms of physical attributes. It encourages men to understand that women are attracted to a combination of physical, emotional, and social qualities.

How does the script explain the dynamic nature of the female gaze regarding physical attraction?

The script explains that physical attraction can grow over time as a woman gets to know a man better. Initially, a man might fall into the 'all right' category, but as she learns more about him, he can either become less attractive or elevate to being 'so hot'.

What is the script's stance on the importance of relative measures like height, income, and status in women's perception of attractiveness?

The script suggests that these measures are important but should be understood in a relative sense. Women generally prefer a man who is slightly taller, earns a bit more, and has a similar status, rather than absolute measures like being six feet tall or earning six figures.

How does the script differentiate between 'wide appeal' and 'niche maxing' in terms of attractiveness?

The script differentiates by stating that while some traits have universal appeal, trying to appeal to everyone is not feasible. Instead, it's more effective to find a niche and excel in it, attracting those who share similar interests or passions.

What misconception does the script address about 'nice guys' and why women might not be attracted to them?

The script addresses the misconception that being overly nice or submissive is attractive to women. It suggests that women are more attracted to men who set boundaries, are confident, and stand up for themselves, which are traits often associated with 'bad boys'.

How does the script explain the appeal of wealth in terms of male attractiveness?

The script explains that it's not the wealth itself that makes a man attractive, but rather the qualities that often accompany wealth, such as hard work, determination, leadership, and courage.