What Will We Truly Miss? (The Fear of Missing Out)

Summary

This video essay explores the psychological phenomenon of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out), examining how it stems from comparison and the constant desire for what others have. It highlights the negative impact of FOMO on mental health and offers ancient philosophical solutions from Stoicism and Epicureanism. Key insights include shifting focus from what we lack to what we have, adopting a broader, cosmic perspective, and using negative visualization to reduce the desire for fleeting pleasures. By embracing contentment and practicing mindful decision-making, we can find peace and release ourselves from the cycle of desire and comparison.

Takeaways

• 😀 Desire can lead to restlessness and hinder a peaceful life, as it creates a sense of lack and fuels the fear of missing out (FOMO).
• 😀 FOMO is the fear of missing out on experiences or opportunities, such as missing a stock investment or a social event, and is exacerbated by social media.
• 😀 FOMO can have negative consequences on mental and physical health, leading to feelings of loneliness, depression, and anxiety.
• 😀 The fear of missing out is often rooted in comparison, where we fear not having what others have or not experiencing what others experience.
• 😀 The more visible the options are through media, the more aware we become of all the things we are missing, increasing the sense of dissatisfaction.
• 😀 We cannot have everything, and living in constant desire for more leads to discontent and the perpetual fear of missing out.
• 😀 Focusing on what we already have instead of what we don't can help alleviate the pain of missing out and increase contentment.
• 😀 Ancient philosophers like Epicurus suggested that desiring what we don't have diminishes our enjoyment of what we do have.
• 😀 A Stoic perspective, such as that from Marcus Aurelius, helps to see the impermanence of life and put FOMO in perspective by reminding us how insignificant our concerns often are in the grand scheme.
• 😀 The things we fear to miss out on may not hold the same importance in the future, and many of them lose significance over time.
• 😀 FOMO often clouds judgment and drives people to pursue things that may not be as beneficial as imagined, leading to negative consequences like unhealthy habits or wasted time.
• 😀 One way to combat FOMO is by using negative visualization to focus on the potential downsides of what we're missing, helping us make wiser decisions.

Q & A

What is the central theme of the video script?

The central theme of the video script is the fear of missing out (FOMO), how it impacts individuals' mental and physical health, and how ancient philosophies like Stoicism and Epicureanism provide solutions to deal with this fear and desire for more.

How does desire contribute to the feeling of FOMO?

Desire leads to FOMO by creating a state of lack or restlessness. When we want something, we feel that we do not have it, which leads to a fear of missing out. Fulfilling these desires momentarily provides contentment but rarely leads to long-term happiness.

What role does comparison play in FOMO?

Comparison plays a crucial role in FOMO. People fear missing out not only because of the actual event or opportunity, but because they fear being left out of shared experiences. This comparison to others intensifies the feeling of inadequacy when we feel others are experiencing things we are not.

How does social media amplify the fear of missing out?

Social media amplifies FOMO by constantly exposing individuals to the highlights of other people's lives. This endless stream of curated snapshots can make individuals feel as though they are missing out on experiences or opportunities, even though many of these experiences may not be as fulfilling as they seem.

What did Theodore Roosevelt mean by 'Comparison is the thief of joy'?

The quote by Theodore Roosevelt means that constantly comparing ourselves to others steals our ability to feel happiness or contentment. When we focus on what others have or experience, we diminish our appreciation for what we already have.

Why can't we have everything, and how does this relate to FOMO?

We can't have everything because modern life presents us with an overwhelming number of options, and our short life spans make it impossible to experience it all. This limited ability to experience everything fuels FOMO, as we are acutely aware of the things we are missing out on.

What is the solution to FOMO according to the video?

The solution to FOMO lies in shifting our focus from what we lack to what we already have. By appreciating what we have, practicing gratitude, and letting go of the desire to have it all, we can reduce the restlessness that leads to FOMO.

How can we practice gratitude to overcome FOMO?

We can practice gratitude by making a list of things we are thankful for and focusing on the positive aspects of our current situation. Reflecting on what we have accomplished and experienced helps us shift attention away from the things we feel we are missing out on.

What is 'negative visualization' and how does it help with FOMO?

Negative visualization is a Stoic practice where we imagine the negative aspects of the things we fear missing out on. By considering the downsides, we are better able to make thoughtful decisions and prevent being swayed by momentary desires, thus reducing FOMO.

How does the Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius help put FOMO into perspective?

Marcus Aurelius encouraged looking at life from a cosmic perspective to remind us of the impermanence of things. By considering how insignificant many of our fears of missing out are in the grand scheme of time, we can diminish their emotional grip and focus on what truly matters.