30 Cheat Codes I Know at 30, That I Wish I Knew at 20

Summary

This insightful video script discusses the importance of embracing one's 20s as a time for exploration, risk-taking, and self-discovery, rather than striving for complete life stability. It emphasizes that it's okay not to have everything figured out by this age, as the brain's frontal lobe isn't fully developed until 25. The script encourages prioritizing growth, learning new skills, managing finances, and building emotional resilience. It also stresses the importance of health, reading, effective communication, and seeking guidance. The speaker shares personal experiences and offers advice on handling failure, embracing awkwardness, and developing a strong work ethic, all while maintaining one's identity and moral values.

Takeaways

• 🧠 Your 20s are a time for exploration and making mistakes, not for having everything figured out.
• 📈 Your brain's frontal lobe isn't fully developed until 25, so it's natural to still be figuring things out in your 20s.
• 🌱 Prioritize personal growth over comfort and invest in learning new skills and experiences.
• 💪 Develop a strong work ethic, emotional resilience, and a capacity for hard work.
• 🍀 It's okay not to know exactly where you're going; focus on planting seeds for future success.
• 🥗 Invest in your physical and mental health, as neglecting it can have long-term consequences.
• 📚 Reading widely can provide knowledge and life experience that helps you navigate through life more effectively.
• ⏰ Learn to manage your time well, as it's a precious resource and key to achieving your goals.
• 🗣️ Improve your communication skills, as they are crucial for both personal and professional relationships.
• 🤝 Surround yourself with people who inspire and challenge you to grow.
• 🤲 Seek guidance and feedback proactively, as it's a sign of strength and can help you grow faster.
• 🙅‍♀️ Don't let fear of judgment or criticism stop you from showcasing your talents and taking risks.
• 🔐 Take responsibility for your actions and commitments; it leads to learning and growth.
• 🚫 Embrace the cringy moments in life as they indicate you're stepping out of your comfort zone and growing.
• 💖 Maintain your individuality and identity even within a relationship.
• 💰 Pursue financial literacy and success, as it provides freedom and reduces stress.
• 🤷‍♀️ Remember that happiness is fleeting; instead, aim for a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction.
• 🏥 Consider therapy as a tool for self-improvement, not just for those with mental health issues.

Q & A

What is the main message of the video about life in your 20s?

The main message is that your 20s are a time for exploration, making mistakes, and figuring out who you are. It's not necessary to have everything figured out by the time you're 30, and it's important to embrace this period as a foundation for future success.

Why is it said that our brains are not fully developed until 25?

The video script mentions that the brain's frontal lobe, responsible for decision-making and impulse control, does not fully develop until the age of 25. This is why there is so much pressure to figure everything out in your 20s, despite still being in a developmental stage.

What are some key skills to focus on in your 20s according to the video?

Some key skills to focus on in your 20s include developing a strong work ethic, learning about financial management, building emotional resilience, and investing in learning new skills.

How does the video suggest approaching health in your 20s?

The video suggests prioritizing health in your 20s by eating right, exercising regularly, getting enough sleep, managing stress, and practicing mindfulness.

What role does reading play in personal development according to the transcript?

Reading is emphasized as a powerful tool for accumulating knowledge and life experience. It helps improve reasoning, articulation, and communication skills, and has a profound impact on almost every area of life.

Why is time management highlighted as crucial in the video?

Time management is highlighted as it helps avoid distractions, ensures progress towards goals, and allows for personal time without stress, setting up a foundation for success in career and personal life.

What does the video say about the importance of communication skills?

The video stresses that effective communication is vital for both personal and professional relationships. It suggests focusing on active listening, respect, and thinking before speaking.

How does the video address the concept of surrounding oneself with the right people?

The video encourages being around people who have achieved what you aspire to, as this environment fosters constant learning and growth.

What is the advice given in the video regarding seeking guidance and feedback?

The video advises not letting pride or fear of appearing inexperienced stop you from seeking guidance and feedback, as it's a sign of strength and can save time and help avoid mistakes.

How does the video script discuss the importance of accountability?

Accountability and ownership are discussed as crucial skills. The video script emphasizes that taking responsibility for one's actions is key to learning from mistakes and achieving success.

What does the video say about embracing failure?

The video encourages viewing failure as a stepping stone to success and an opportunity for growth, rather than a roadblock.

How does the video script suggest approaching relationships in your 20s?

The video script advises maintaining individuality and independence in relationships, and not sacrificing personal goals or identity for the sake of a relationship.

Outlines

00:00

📚 Embrace Your 20s for Exploration and Learning

The speaker emphasizes that the 20s are a chapter for exploration, not a time to have everything figured out. They highlight the societal pressure to have a career, relationships, and finances sorted by the end of this decade. However, the truth is that most people don't have it all figured out, and it's okay because the brain's frontal lobe isn't fully developed until 25. The 20s should be about trying new things, taking risks, and learning from failures. It's a time to prioritize growth over comfort, invest in new skills, and develop a strong work ethic. The speaker also stresses the importance of laying a foundation for future success through habits, skills, experiences, and personal development.

05:02

💪 Prioritize Health and Invest in Personal Growth

The speaker discusses the importance of health in the 20s, cautioning against neglecting it in favor of career or social life. They advise eating right, exercising regularly, getting enough sleep, and managing stress. Reading is also highlighted as a powerful tool for accumulating knowledge and life experience. The speaker encourages reading on a variety of topics to improve reasoning, articulation, and communication skills. Additionally, they stress the importance of time management, effective communication, and surrounding oneself with people who inspire growth.

10:02

🤝 Cultivate Relationships and Seek Guidance

The speaker underscores the significance of communication skills for both personal and professional relationships. They mention that poor communication can lead to misunderstandings and that clarity and respect are crucial. The importance of being in the right environment, learning from others, and seeking guidance is also discussed. The speaker encourages seeking feedback proactively to identify blind spots and improve. They also stress the need for personal responsibility and accountability in all aspects of life.

15:03

🚀 Embrace Risk and Overcome Imposter Syndrome

The speaker encourages embracing cringy moments and taking risks in the 20s, as this is a time for growth and recovery from failure. They discuss the importance of not playing it safe and learning from discomfort. The speaker also addresses the issue of underplaying one's talents and the impact of imposter syndrome. They advise taking action despite self-doubt and not waiting for external validation or feedback. The importance of showing one's work to build personal brand and receive feedback is also highlighted.

20:06

💖 Maintain Identity in Relationships and Avoid Ego

The speaker talks about the importance of maintaining individuality and not losing oneself in relationships. They emphasize the need for a healthy relationship that complements who one is, rather than consuming them. The speaker also discusses the high ego often present in the 20s and how admitting what one doesn't know can open doors to new opportunities. They suggest that setbacks can be learning opportunities and that one should not let ego get in the way of learning and growing.

25:06

💼 Build a Strong Work Ethic and Chase Fulfillment

The speaker stresses the importance of building a strong work ethic and commitment to tasks in the 20s. They discuss the impact of ego on decision-making and how to overcome it. The speaker also talks about the importance of doing hard things to build willpower and tenacity. They suggest that people who marry later in life tend to have better and longer-lasting marriages. The speaker encourages taking risks, experimenting, and viewing failures as opportunities for growth. They also discuss the importance of building a strong moral compass and ethical standpoint, as well as the pursuit of financial success and literacy.

💼 Seek Therapy and Take Action for Personal Growth

The speaker discusses the benefits of therapy for personal growth and overcoming challenges. They emphasize the importance of taking action and being responsible for one's own life. The speaker also talks about the pursuit of fulfillment over happiness and the importance of making decisions that align with one's future self. They encourage not sweating the small stuff and focusing on growth, exploration, and self-discovery in the 20s.

Keywords

💡Exploration

Exploration refers to the act of investigating or experiencing new things, especially in an unfamiliar area. In the context of the video, exploration is encouraged as a way to discover oneself and the world during one's 20s. The script emphasizes that it's a time for trying new things and taking risks without the pressure of having everything figured out.

💡Mistakes

Mistakes are errors or incorrect actions. The video suggests that making mistakes in one's 20s is not only inevitable but also valuable. They serve as learning opportunities and are integral to personal growth, as they help in understanding one's strengths and weaknesses.

💡Foundation

A foundation in this context refers to the basic principles or activities that provide support for further actions or developments. The video uses the term to describe the importance of laying a solid base in one's 20s through learning, saving, and developing a strong work ethic, which will support future success.

💡Growth

Growth here implies personal development and maturity. The video stresses that prioritizing growth over comfort in one's 20s is crucial. It involves learning new skills, managing finances, and developing emotional resilience, which are all part of becoming a well-rounded individual.

💡Health

Health, as discussed in the video, encompasses both physical and mental well-being. It cautions against neglecting health in the pursuit of career or social life, advocating for a balanced lifestyle that includes proper diet, regular exercise, and stress management.

💡Reading

Reading is highlighted as a powerful tool for acquiring knowledge and life experience in the video. It's encouraged as a means to prepare for life's challenges, improve reasoning and communication skills, and foster a broader understanding of various topics.

💡Time Management

Time Management refers to the strategy of using one's time effectively to increase productivity or efficiency. The video emphasizes the importance of learning time management skills in the 20s to avoid getting caught up in unproductive activities and to ensure progress towards personal and professional goals.

💡Communication

Communication is the imparting or exchanging of information. The script points out that effective communication is vital for both personal and professional relationships. It suggests that being able to express oneself clearly and respectfully can prevent misunderstandings and foster stronger connections.

💡Accountability

Accountability is the willingness to accept responsibility for one's actions. The video encourages taking full responsibility for one's commitments as a means to ensure learning from mistakes, improving credibility, and achieving personal and professional success.

💡Risk

Risk in this context refers to the potential for loss or injury. The video encourages embracing risk in one's 20s as a way to grow and learn from failure. It suggests that taking risks can lead to significant rewards and is a natural part of the journey to success.

💡Imposter Syndrome

Imposter Syndrome is defined as a psychological pattern where individuals doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent fear of being exposed as a 'fraud'. The video advises taking action and showing up despite self-doubt to overcome this syndrome and build confidence.

Highlights

Your 20s are just one chapter of your life, not the whole book.

Your brain's frontal lobe does not develop fully till you are 25.

Embrace your 20s as a time for exploration and making mistakes.

Your 30s and 40s are for setting up for the future, focusing on long-term habits and skills.

Prioritize growth over comfort and invest in learning new skills.

It's okay not to know exactly where you want to go; focus on planting seeds for future success.

Invest in your physical and mental health in your 20s for long-term benefits.

Reading can provide profound impacts on almost every area of your life.

Time management is crucial for success in your career and personal life.

Good communication skills are essential for both personal and professional relationships.

Being around people who have achieved what you want to achieve can accelerate your learning.

Your success in life depends on the people around you; build strong relationships.

Seeking help and guidance is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Being proactive in seeking feedback can help you learn and grow faster.

Accountability and ownership are important skills for success.

Embrace the cringy moments in life as they lead to growth.

Playing small limits your value and potential; own your strengths and weaknesses.

Overcome imposter syndrome by taking action and showing up despite self-doubt.

Nothing worth having comes easy; be willing to make sacrifices for your goals.

Show your work to build your personal brand and receive valuable feedback.

Building a strong work ethic and commitment to tasks will attract success.

Admitting you don't know something is a sign of strength and opens doors to new opportunities.

It's not about you; understand that others' actions are often a reflection of themselves, not you.

Doing hard things improves your willpower and tenacity.

People who marry later in life tend to have better and longer marriages.

In your 20s, focus on self-discovery and exploration, not rushing into major life decisions.

Maintain your identity and individuality in relationships; don't sacrifice yourself for the sake of the relationship.

Failure is a stepping stone to success; view it as an opportunity for growth.

Build a strong moral compass and value system in your 20s to guide your life decisions.

Pursue financial success and literacy; it provides freedom and reduces stress.

Chase fulfillment rather than happiness; it leads to more contentment and better life decisions.

Therapy is a powerful tool for self-improvement and emotional maturity.

You are responsible for your own life; take action and be your own hero.

Not every decision in your 20s will matter in the long run; focus on what will.

Transcripts

here are 30 life cheat codes I now know

in my 30s but I wish I knew at 20 and

honestly they should be teaching this

stuff in

school there is often so much pressure

on us when we go out of high school when

we graduate college to have everything

figured out in our 20s our career our

relationship our finances even a life

purpose but the truth is that your 20s

are just one chapter of your life they

are not the whole book you do not have

to have it all sorted out by the time

that you finish your 20s AKA by the time

you hit your 30s and in reality most

people actually don't have it figured

out you know what's fascinating is that

your brain's frontal lobe does not

develop fully till you are 25 so before

that you are a literal child and still

there is so much pressure to figure

everything out so I don't know what

people are expecting but this is not it

so instead of stressing out about having

everything in place embrace the fact

that your 20s are a time for exploration

they're a time for making mistakes they

are a time for figuring out who you

really are this is your decade to try

new things to take risks to learn from

failures you have time to Pivot you have

time to change directions you have time

to reinvent yourself that is what your

30s and your 40s are

[Music]

for like I said this is the decade that

is about setting yourself up for the

future you need to focus on on habits

skills experiences that will serve you

in the long run whether it's your career

your finances your relationships or your

personal development think of your 20s

as the time where you are laying down

the foundation for everything that is to

come into your life in the future right

so this means you need to prioritize

growth over comfort you need to invest

in learning new skills you need to learn

about how to save and manage your money

you need to develop a strong work ethic

it's absolutely okay to not know exactly

where you want to go or exactly where

you are what matters is that you are

planting the seeds for your future

success so how you approach your health

your work ethic Your Capacity to work

hard your emotional resilience these are

the skills that you need to focus on in

your 20s learn as much as you can

explore as much as you can build as many

skills as you can experience as much as

you can this will shape the person that

you become in your 1s and your 40s

everything that I personally know today

all the success that I have the freedom

that I have the clarity that I have is

because I experimented with so many

things in my

20s it is so easy to neglect your health

and most people in their 20s do not give

a hoot about their health especially

people from my generation never gave a

hoot about their health the only

constant for people in their 20s when

you know I was in my 20s was drinking

partying every night going out with

friends and drinking some more and while

a part of that is absolutely all right

it is so easy to neglect your health

when you are busy building your career

or when you're busy building your social

life but investing in your physical and

your mental health now will pay off in

the long run start by eating right

exercising regularly and getting enough

sleep it's just these three basic things

also don't forget to manage stress and

practice mindfulness your body and your

mind are what will carry you through

your life prioritize them in your 20s

you do not not want to wake up one day

wishing that you had taken better care

of

yourself the amount of knowledge and

life experience that you can accumulate

just by reading is insane there are so

many experts who have gone through all

parts of the human experience before us

and reading what they have to say makes

us a lot better prepared to face life

even if you are only able to apply 1% of

that knowledge and it does not just mean

self-help or non-fiction books make time

for reading on any topic that interests

you even if it has nothing to do with

your career I read about space deep

ocean and I've been doing this for years

it is completely fascinating I also like

to read about engineering design again

it's nowhere close to what I'm doing in

life but accumulating knowledge and

reading from different sources helps you

with better reasoning with improving

articulation with improving

communication and so many other skills

reading has a profound impact on almost

every single area of your life the more

you read the better you get get at life

remember

that a lot of us when we get some

Freedom after leaving school we become

very mindless with how we spend our time

and this actually becomes a very deeply

ingrained habit very very quickly right

which is why a lot of people when they

start working when they start to get

serious about their jobs they have a

very tough time managing B time and that

sets you up for failure in the long term

time is your most precious resource and

in your 20s if you learn how to manage

your time well it is a GameChanger for

your career for your personal life

because it's so easy to get caught up in

distractions and feel like you're

constantly busy without making any real

progress but starting to prioritize your

time starting to manage your time will

help you understand what truly matters

you'll be able to work on your goals

you'll be able to take time out for

yourself you'll be able to do all the

things that you want to do without going

crazy all your relationship ships both

personal and professional depend on your

ability to communicate well and hardly

anybody knows how to do this well a lot

of people appear rude unruly a lot of

people seem to lack Clarity not because

they have or do all of those things but

because they do not know how to

communicate they don't know how to

communicate what they're feeling they

don't know how to communicate what they

want they don't know how to communicate

in professional settings and personal

settings it is a nightmare I work with

people who come off as snobbish and rude

because of how they speak and write and

that's not what you want because nobody

will want to work with you or be with

you if you don't know how to communicate

how do you improve your communication

skills I am going to make a dedicated

video on this in October probably but

for now focus on these three things

listening actively being respectful and

thinking before you speak or

[Music]

right if you are always the smartest

person in the room you are in the wrong

room it might sound intimidating but

nothing will make you learn faster than

being around people who have already

achieved what you want to achieve and

being in a space where you are

constantly learning from others whether

it's about business life New

Perspectives it forces you to level up

it's uncomfortable at first but that

discomfort is where the real growth

happens that's how you evolve into the

best version of yourself how can you do

this take up internships at reputed

places or even jobs where you know you

are going to be with people who have

achieved a lot of what you want to

achieve be in close contact with people

who are 5 10 15 steps ahead of you and

your growth will Skyrocket like

this if you want to go fast go alone but

if you want to go further go together

everything you want to do in life is

dependent on the people around you if

you are constantly disinterested

disengaged and in competition with other

people your life is going to get a lot

harder my friends so much harder so

learn to become curious about other

people to treat them as allies as

friends instead of enemies because

genuine curiosity about their life their

roles in society their challenges and

how they have handled it will make you a

better Ally for them will make you much

better Connections in life focus on

making friends not just building your

network and focus on how you make people

feel not just how they make you feel

people are going to be your biggest

asset moving forward and if you can

learn how to navigate your relationships

you're going to become Unbreakable

many people struggle in silence thinking

that they have to figure everything out

on their own but the truth is that

nobody succeeds alone like we have

already established whether it's advice

from a mentor feedback from a peer

guidance from someone who has been where

you have been seeking help is not a

weakness it's actually a sign of

strength because it shows that you know

where you lack strength and you are

willing to work on it do not let Pride

or the fear of looking inexperienced

stop you from reaching out and seeking

Guidance the right guidance can save you

time it can help you avoid mistakes and

it can push you so much further than you

can go alone speaking about seeking

guidance from other

people a lot of the times in life I have

come across people who just keep waiting

for feedback who will never proactively

go out of their way and seek feedback on

the work that they have done waiting for

feedback only limits your potential when

your proactive when you seek out

constructive criticism you learn what is

working and what is not working very

very quickly and it gives you insights

into how to make meaningful changes it

helps you identify your blind spots a

lot of the times we don't know where we

are going wrong feedback helps you

correct

[Music]

that be responsible for the things that

you are doing a lot of the times people

get into situations they will get into

relationships into professional

commitments where they are half-hearted

about it right most people do this and

they feel like the results whatever

they're doing is not their

responsibility it is the responsibility

of someone else they will try to shift

the blame they will try to shift the

responsibility altogether and that not

only makes you less credible it actually

makes you unwilling to learn from your

mistakes it makes you unwilling to give

in 100% to the things that you are doing

and if you continue down that road you

are always going to be mediocre you

never going to be the person who reaches

the top because you were never willing

to invest 100% of yourself into that

thing accountability and ownership is

such a great skill to have it is such an

important skill to have and not enough

people in the world have

it so many people ask me in DMS on

comments how do you do this how do you

be on social media are you not concerned

about what your parents are going to say

honey if I would have let that stop me

would I be able to be where I am today

no right you need to embrace the cringy

stuff in your life if you really want to

grow we all have moments where we feel

awkward we feel uncool we feel

embarrassed but if you Embrace those and

you continue to do the work despite

feeling all of those feelings you become

a lot better at life growth comes from

discomfort and if you are always playing

it safe if you are going to hold

yourself back your 20s are supposed to

be the time where you take the most

amount of risk because you have time to

recover from that risk if things don't

work out in your 30s and your 40s and

you have the power to steer your life in

any direction only one risk has to pay

off for you to catapult to success it is

scary it's intimidating but that is

exactly why it's important embracing

cringe is proof that you're trying that

you're learning that you're pushing past

your comfort zone the sooner you accept

it the faster you will

grow many people downplay their talents

they stay quiet in rooms where they

should be speaking up and you might do

this to avoid judgment you might do this

to avoid criticism you might avoid doing

this because you don't want to make

other people feel comfortable maybe you

fear coming off as arrogant or whatever

it is right shrinking yourself playing

small does not serve you or anyone

around you the truth is that playing

small only keeps you stuck it limits the

value that you bring to others and that

ways you'll never be respected people

respect those who confidently own their

strengths who confidently own their

weaknesses if you continuously keep

hiding your strengths and your

weaknesses you are never going to grow

you're only holding yourself back from

opportunities and the recognition you

[Music]

deserve imposter syndrome is that

nagging feeling that you do not belong

that you are not qualified enough that

sooner or later people are going to

figure out that you're a broad I have

dealt with this so much it is so common

but you need to remember that imposter

syndrome is not how other people see you

it's how you see yourself and most

people will deal with imposter syndrome

by just avoiding doing the work by

avoiding the opportunities in the first

place by staying in their comfort zone

but in all honesty the only way to

overcome your imposter syndrome is to

take action to keep showing up even when

you doubt yourself and over time your

results actually speak louder than your

insecurities the more you prove to

yourself that you can do it the quieter

that voice of self-doubt

becomes we often hesitate when it comes

to going after what we truly desire

because we are afraid of the sacrifices

and the discomfort and the hard work

that is going to be involved but the

truth is nothing worth having comes easy

you may need to give up short-term

Pleasures you may need to work longer

hours step outside of your comfort zone

it's not about about being ruthless but

about staying focused and doing whatever

it takes to reach your goals people who

succeed are the ones who are willing to

do what other people are not willing to

do this is a part of stepping outside

your comfort zone obviously because by

putting your work out there you are

opening yourself up to other people's

opinions their criticisms their two

sense but that is exactly why you need

to do it most people are just too afraid

they want to remain hidden or of their

life and that is exactly how you Fade

Into Oblivion if you want to have a

fulfilling life if you want to have a

fulfilling career you need to show your

work it builds your personal brand it

makes you visible to people who

potentially will want to work with you

it also helps you receive helpful

feedback that you otherwise will not get

and when people are invested in your

journey that helps you build a great

network of collaborators of supporters

over time you should read this book

called show your work by Austin C on and

everything that I'm saying here will

make 100%

sense how you do one thing is how you do

everything so if you think that you can

be clumsy and lazy with everything

except your work that is not how it

actually works building a great work

ethic building commitment to the task at

hand and completing that task to the

best of your ability this will attract

success to you it will attract the right

kind of network for you it will make you

a finisher so many people I know are not

finishers they just take on something

they leave it Midway and then they're

done with it for life but is that really

how you

succeed it is so weird but in our 20s we

are riding this weird ego height 20year

olds are the most egoistic people I know

I was so egoistic when I was in my 20s

even though we think we know everything

about the world in reality we don't know

anything but that mindset makes us very

reluctant to seek help or to seek advice

or to admit that we don't know something

but as surprising as it may sound

admitting the fact admitting that you

don't know something is actually a great

sign of strength it signals that you are

open to learning that you are letting

your ego go you're not letting your ego

get in the way and that opens doors to

New Opportunities like nothing

[Music]

else now because in our 20s we have such

a high ego we think we know everything

when things don't go our way that hurt

that loss feels so personal it attacks

our ego more than anything in the world

and if that's happening that's a great

way to remind yourself that it's

probably not about you sometimes people

say or do things for their own reasons

and it does not necessarily reflect your

worth or your abilities the sooner you

understand this the quicker you will

reach a Zen State of Mind the quicker

you will have more peace of mind the

exception to this is probably

relationship because there are two

parties involved and the decision-

making of why the party impacts the

other party as well but in most cases

people are doing things not because of

you but because of their own

selves I was recently listening to this

podcast by Dr hberman where he's talking

about increasing the brain's willpower

and tenacity and one of the key points

he makes is when you do hard things it

actually improves your willpower and

your tenacity our brain has this Center

called the anterior mid singulate cortex

which is linked with building more

willpower and it can actually be

strengthened by doing hard things the

more you do difficult things the things

that you perceive as difficult the

stronger that center of the brain

becomes you're actually training your

brain to be more resilient and the more

you do this in your 20s the easier life

becomes in your 30s and your 40s trust

me a lot of conditioning in Indian

societies is uh that you need to get

married and start having kids all before

you would turn 30

because that jazz but there was this

research done recently I will try and

Link it somewhere here where it was

found that people who get married in

their 30s or get married late in life

tend to have better marriages tend to

also have longer marriages you know the

instances of divorces in such people

actually go down I think that's a great

marker that suggests that when you are

mature enough to take these life

decisions that is when you should do so

the concept of settling down should not

be for your 20s your 20s are your time

for exploration for self-discovery not

for rushing into major life decisions

this is the time where you truly try and

understand what you want out of life and

don't just jump into something and then

regret it later on that's not what you

want to do so even if your elders are

pressuring you into getting married or

into you know going and doing this thing

or settling down in your 20s especially

in your early 20s you need to sit down

and have a conversation with them I

think this is the best thing that I have

done in life is to not get married and

to not take this thing lying down in my

20s and actually wait till I am this age

to be in a major relationship and

serious relationships and to actually

take that plunge where I'm deciding yes

I want to get

married it is so easy in your 20s to get

swept up in a new relationship

especially because for a lot of people

this will be their first or maybe their

second relationship things that feel

like true love because you become deeply

invested in the other person but losing

yourself in the process sacrificing your

identity your goals your individuality

can be such a deterrent can harm you so

much in the long run in your 20s you

need to figure out you need to spend

time figuring out what a healthy

relationship actually is a healthy

relationship is one that compliments Who

You Are are it does not consume you it

does not make you abandon your passions

your hobbies or your friendships for the

sake of the relationship it helps you

maintain your Independence it helps you

grow while growing together right and

it's an important part of your 20s your

relationships are going to be very very

important in building the person that

you are but at the same time it's very

important for you to maintain your own

sense of identity and sense of self do

not sacrifice that for the sake of your

relationship

[Music]

if I knew this in my 20s I would have

taken a lot more risks than I actually

did I would have experimented so much

more than I actually did I still did a

lot but I think I would have gone way

out of my comfort zone to experiment to

take risks if I knew that failure was

helping me grow failure is your

superpower it's also a natural part of

life it's a stepping stone to success

right a failed relationship failed

friendships a failed career choice

anything it's not the end of the world

it actually teaches you what you're

probably not good at where you are

lacking what you need to improve all of

those things right instead of viewing it

as a roadblock start viewing your

failures as opportunities and that will

just Skyrocket your

growth these will eventually become your

North Star your moral compass which

guides you through your life's decisions

it's very important to have your unique

experiences but it's also crucial to

figure out what what kind of person you

want to become and that starts in your

20s with every decision that you make

you need to figure out whether that sits

morally right with you are you going to

be able to live with that decision 10

years down the line and that's a great

way to check in with your notar and that

is how you cement your belief system

that is how you cement your moral values

and your ethics being a good person is

very important and another part of this

of building your ethical you know High

Ground your High Ground is also to

unlearn things that don't sit right with

you to unlearn behaviors to unlearn

conditioning that does not align with

your future self and your value system

when you are trying to build this moral

ethical standpoint for yourself this not

star for yourself when you're trying to

figure out what you think is right in

society and what is wrong you will need

to unlearn so much of the conditioning

that has happened for you in the last 20

25 years this will probably require you

to go against what Society thinks is

right against what sometimes your

parents might think is right but you

need to take those risks Because unless

you do you're not going to figure out

what is actually right for

you money can solve so many of your

problems but we are so often fed the

narrative that money is evil or it

changes you that you shouldn't Chase

material things Chase meaning and

spirituality all of that stuff and

that's completely do not shine

away from chasing financial success so

many people on the girl talk videos that

I do they comment oh my God you need so

much money step one of this self-care

thing should be that earn money yes earn

money who is stopping you why are you

not earning money why are you holding

yourself back why don't you want to go

after financial success money literally

gives you the freedom to live life on

your own terms it can remove a lot of

your unnecessary stress why are you not

focusing on building streams of income

if you do that you can actually focus on

what truly matters without worrying

about where your next paycheck is going

to come from please make financial

literacy and earning money are

non-negotiable in your 20s if you learn

how to do this one thing 80% of your

life problems are

[Music]

gone financial literacy is essential for

everyone regardless of their age or

income level in fact the first thing

that you should do after you have gotten

your education is to figure out how you

can make money start by creating a

budget start by tracking your income and

your expenses get a clear picture of

where you stand financially and how you

can improve your financial life I have

already made one video on this topic so

you can go check it out here I'll also

be making another video on investments

Etc how I do that for myself uh pretty

soon and then you guys can check that

out

second now this is just as crucial as

learning how to make money how to build

those skills that will make make you

money you need to know how to stop

trading time for money most of us are

fed the same

right and then

retire right but if you really want to

live your best life if you really want

to be financially independent if you

want to have the ability to make your

own financial decisions you need to

build wealth and many of us are trapped

in that cycle of trading your time for

money which is working a long hour job

or working long hours for a very fixed

income which incrementally increases

every year but it's nearly not enough to

make you wealthy it's a necessary step

in life having a job is necessary I'm

not

saying that's not what I'm saying what I

mean to say is that you need to figure

out how you can FasTrack your success

even if you're in a job how can you

ensure that you are not being paid for

your time like you're not a gadha Maui

employee but you are being being paid

for the value that you deliver for the

work that you bring to the table the

money that you bring to the table and

that is a very very essential skill if

you want a detailed video on this topic

let me know and then we'll consider

making that

next happiness is a very complex emotion

and it doesn't come from a single Source

most of us are made to feel like The

Only Thing Worth chasing in Life or

worth going after in life is happiness

but the more you chase happiness the

more it eludes you the more it runs away

from you it's also a fleeting feeling

you're not going to be constantly happy

all of the time so a better Compass to

guide you is to Chase or to pursue the

feeling of fulfillment what inherently

makes you feel satisfied everything that

you do in life every relationship that

you have make this your notar instead of

happiness and you'll make much better

decision

in life it will teach you how to balance

your work your life what to seek out in

relationships and in work and that will

make you a much more content person as

you move

forward therapy is such a powerful tool

for working through your roadblocks your

trauma for gaining a better

understanding of yourself it provides a

safe space a supportive space to explore

your own thoughts and feelings therapy

is not just for somebody who is mentally

unwell therapy is for anyone who wants

to improve their life right it can help

you identify patterns of behavior the

root causes of your struggles and it can

help you develop healthy coping

mechanisms if you do this in your 20s by

the time you're in your 30s in your late

30s you become a much more emotionally

mature adult you develop a strong sense

of self you start to create a life that

is fulfilling and enjoyable rather than

just chasing after fleeting things

therapy should be

non-negotiable as harsh as that sounds

it is absolutely true waiting for

somebody to fix your problems or to show

you the way will keep you stuck for a

lot longer than if you were just start

taking action whether it's a tough

situation whether it's a challenge if

it's a goal that you're trying to reach

the only person who is responsible for

making it happen is you no one is going

to come in and magically do it for you

on your behalf they can guide you they

can probably nudge you in a particular

direction but they can't come and take

action for you that creates change you

need to be the one who shows up for

yourself you need to be the one who

pushes through their obstacles you need

to be the one who takes control of their

own lives it's about realizing that you

are your own hero you are the main

character of your life if you're not

taking action like a main character how

are the main character moments going to

happen to you as we come to the end of

this video one thing I really want you

guys to understand is that in your 20s

it feels like every decision every

single thing that you're doing is going

to matter a lot but in reality that is

not the case some things are going to

matter more than others some things are

not going to matter at all so whatever

decision you're taking whatever change

you're wanting to make just ask yourself

whether this is going to matter in 10

years or not if it's not going to matter

in 10 years if it's not there's no point

sweating the small stuff your 20s are

your time for growth your exploration

taking risks making the most of your

time to figure out who you want to be in

the future if something doesn't align

with your future that should not hold

you back that decision that thing that

decision should not occupy a lot of your

mental space and that was it I am once

again putting everything on screen here

are the 30 points that we covered in

today's video because somebody asked me

to do a recap at the end of each video

so here it is and if you enjoy this

video make sure you like press that

thumbs up because that really helps it

reach the right people and let me know

in the comments which piece of advice

out of these was the most profound or

the most helpful for you and I'm going

to see you guys very very soon in the

next one also don't forget to check out

this video next because YouTube says

you're going to love it bye