I thought I was going to be Single for the rest of my Life, then this Happened!
Summary
TLDRこのビデオスクリプトでは、話者が自分の恋愛生活の歴史を振り返りながら、孤独で終わると思っていた人生が、妻に出会い変わる瞬間を共有します。彼は、幼少期に両親の離婚や家族からの愛の不足を経験し、その後の恋愛においてもその影響を受け続けたと語ります。しかし、彼が一人で完結することを接受し、自分自身を愛することの重要性を学んだ時、妻に出会い、人生が変わったと感じています。この話は、自己愛を通じて正しい愛を引き寄せる方法を示し、聴衆に自己認識と自己成長の重要性を伝えています。
Takeaways
- 😀 自分自身が満足しているとき、他人と結婚する前に、自分自身を愛することの重要性を学ぶ。
- 💔 幼い頃から愛を欠いていた経験は、後の恋愛に対する期待や要求に影響を与える可能性がある。
- 🤔 恋愛において、相手が自分を満足させることができないと感じると、自身の不足を認識する必要がある。
- 👫 相手が自分を完璧に満たすことができないという事実を受け入れ、共通の愛好や価値観を共有することの重要性。
- 🧘♂️ 一人で過ごすことを楽しむことで、自己完結性を感じ、より良い恋愛関係を築く準備をする。
- 🤝 愛する前に、自分自身を理解し、自己を愛することから始まる健全な恋愛の基礎を築く。
- 🚫 過去の悪い恋愛経験から学び、自分に適したパートナーを選ぶための基準を見直すことの大切さ。
- 🌟 自分が満たされていると感じると、同じエネルギーや価値観を持つ人を引き寄せる可能性が高まる。
- 💡 自分が満足しているかどうかを常に自問し、それが恋愛関係の健全さを示す指標とすること。
- 🏋️♀️ 自分自身を愛することは、自己成長と独立性を高めるプロセスであり、恋愛の成功につながる。
- 🌱 自己完結性を見つけることで、より良いパートナーを見つける可能性が高まり、健全な関係を築く。
Q & A
スクリプトの主人公は何を通じて結婚相手に出会いましたか?
-主人公は、自分が永遠に独身であるかもしれないと諦めかけたとき、妻に出会いました。
主人公が子供の頃に経験した親の離婚は彼の恋愛観にどのような影響を与えましたか?
-親の離婚は主人公にとって愛の不足をもたらし、彼は恋人に愛と期待を求める傾向がありました。
主人公が中学時代に抱いていた感情とはどのようなものでしょうか?
-中学時代の主人公は、クラスメイトの女の子に片思いをしており、彼女に自分の感情を伝えることはできませんでした。
主人公が高校生の時に感じた恋愛に対する変化は何でしたか?
-高校生になったことで、主人公はより選り好みになり、誰かと交際するにつれて、相手が自分にとって正しい人ではないと感じるようになりました。
24-25歳の時に主人公が交際した女性はどのような人でしたか?
-24-25歳の時に主人公が交際した女性は外見は美しくても、中身は非常に醜く、彼の家族から盗み、嘘をつき、不倫をしていた人でした。
主人公が結婚相手に出会いたかったと思う瞬間に何を感じましたか?
-主人公は自分が一人でいても満足であり、完結していると感じ、その時が結婚相手に出会いたくなった瞬間でした。
主人公が述べた「自己完結性」とはどのような概念ですか?
-「自己完結性」とは、他人に依存せずに自己満足を感じ、完結している状態を指します。主人公はこれが愛情を見つける鍵だと考えています。
主人公が恋愛における期待とは何だと考えていますか?
-主人公は恋愛における期待は誤りであり、一人で完結しているときにこそ、適切な愛情を引き寄せることができると感じています。
主人公が友人にアドバイスした内容は何でしたか?
-主人公は友人に一人で過ごす時間を大事にし、自分自身と楽しむことの重要性をアドバイスしました。
スクリプトの主人公が伝えたいメッセージとは何ですか?
-主人公が伝えたいメッセージは、自己愛を学び、一人で完結している状態から、適切な愛情を引き寄せることが大切だとすることです。
Outlines
😌 自己への愛と人生のパートナーとの出会い
この段落では、話者は自分の人生にパートナーが現れなかったと思い込んでいた時期と、それが変わる瞬間を共有しています。彼は子供の頃から人気なかったことで、恋愛にコンプレックスを持っていました。高校時代には片思いを持ち、その後数人の女性と交際をしましたが、心から「これが運命の相手」とは感じることができませんでした。24-25歳の時に彼は美しくても心が醜い女性と交際し、その経験から若い女性との交際を諦めました。そして、彼は自分が永遠に一人でいるかもしれないと受け入れ、その時点で彼の妻に出会いました。彼は自己完結性を見つけることの重要性を学び、それが彼の妻との出会いにつながったと感じています。
🤔 自己完結性と恋愛におけるエネルギーの法則
話者は自己完結性と恋愛におけるエネルギーの法則について語っています。彼は人々が「誰かを愛するまで自分は完全ではない」と考えると、そのエネルギーが不完全さを放ち、同様に不完全な人々を引き寄せると指摘しています。自己を愛することの重要性を説き、それが正しい恋愛関係を築くための鍵であると主張しています。彼は若い頃に交際中に気づいた自己への愛の不足と、それが彼の行動に与える影響についても触れています。自己完結性を見つけることで、より良い恋愛関係を築くことができると結び付けています。
💡 自己への愛が恋愛に与える影響
この段落では、話者は自己への愛が恋愛関係に与える影響について深く掘り下げています。彼は自己完結性を持っていない人たちが相手に求めてしまうことと、それが関係に与える悪影響について解説しています。自己完結性を持つことの重要性と、それがどのように相手との健康的な関係を築く助けになるのかを説明しています。また、友人との会話から自己完結性を見つけるよう励まし、自己完結性を持つことの大切さを再確認しています。彼は自己完結性を持つことで、より良い恋愛関係につながると結び付けています。
Mindmap
Keywords
💡自己完結感
💡自己愛
💡孤独
💡信頼
💡自己理解
💡期待
💡自己完結
💡恋愛
💡自己成長
💡エネルギー
Highlights
The speaker shares a personal story of overcoming the belief of being single for life.
A moment of realization led to a change in belief and subsequently meeting his wife.
Growing up as a 'nerdy kid' and the impact of early parental divorce on the speaker's love life.
The concept of 'tough love' in Asian families and its effect on the speaker's expectations in relationships.
The speaker's realization of becoming more selective as he got older in his dating life.
Understanding when a relationship isn't right, even if it seems good on the surface.
The struggle with trust and finding someone to truly be with.
A bad relationship at 24 that led to the speaker being tired of dating and reconsidering his approach.
The pivotal moment of accepting the possibility of being single forever and finding happiness in it.
The importance of self-love and feeling complete before attracting a partner.
The misconception of needing someone to feel complete and how it affects the type of relationships one attracts.
Learning from a young age about the importance of self-love and understanding one's emotions.
The unfair expectation placed on partners to fulfill emotional needs that one has not addressed themselves.
The speaker's advice on spending time alone to understand and love oneself.
The idea that being comfortable and happy alone can attract the right kind of relationships.
The importance of doing things for oneself and not relying on others for happiness.
The speaker's perspective on why people who are not happy alone may struggle to find fulfilling relationships.
Encouraging self-reflection and understanding one's own emotions to improve relationship dynamics.
The call to action for listeners to share their experiences with self-love and attracting the right partners.
Transcripts
hey friends today I want to share with
you uh a story of
how I really thought that was going to
be single for the rest of my life and
just when I was about to give up on the
idea of really being with somebody uh
for the rest of my life and getting
married um that's when I met my wife
today and uh going back thinking back I
think it attributed to just one kind of
uh change of belief or or or I I
remember a specific thoughts and and
that's how and looking back it all makes
sense um so I'm going to share that with
you but just a little bit you know in
the about my dating life history
basically growing up I wasn't really a
popular kid um just like a nerdy kid at
school uh had a first CR in 8ighth
grade don't know why I was listening to
like soft music uh was like the song is
called one more try or something and I
remember tearing and crying I I don't
really know why I had this crush on this
girl and I put all my emotion in in love
with this girl but she really doesn't
even know anything of me I think she
catched me looking at her a couple times
or knows that know that I like her but
it's it's weird I think it just has to
do with you know my my mom and dad
divorced early when I was a little kid
so I didn't have a father figure growing
up with my mom she always worked so I
never had a love for my mom so I think
it's that lack of love and I would say
that has to do with a lot of Asian
people meaning uh our Asian family
always tough love and you never have
that kind of like that complete love so
you know you always tend to grow up and
put all that love and expectation on
somebody uh you know uh that that you
have a crush on so in uh junior high had
crushing this girl she probably doesn't
even know I exist but and then High
School had a crush on
somebody uh freshman and then it wasn't
until probably uh sophomore year that I
dated a
girl
um but you know dating this and that I
realized as I got older I became more
picky um as you know what I want and you
know sometime you date girls or you date
some a guy or girl sometimes in the back
of your head you know that this is not
the one for you whether is you know
their personality or something or
they're selfish or whatever the reason
is in your
mind this is not the one for you but
then you still you still date I mean
their personality is great you get along
you still you still date um you know I
date for a year or 2 years but you just
never thought that you know this is the
one for you right and uh you know just
Society of how you could just never
trust a girl or a guy uh whatever um but
you just never felt like you can trust a
person with your heart and then and you
can find someone that you can really be
with I don't know why I had that kind of
thinking but I was
um and then I had a 25 about 24 25 years
old and then I dated this one girl she
was really beautiful but she was
beautiful on the outside the most
beautiful person on outside but also the
ugliest person in the inside she stole
from my family lies to me cheat on me
and she was young she was like probably
19 years old and I was
24 around there and that kind of
kind of like made me really tired well I
didn't want any more young girls first
of all and then it just made me really
tired relationship and I remember saying
to myself and I think this is the moment
that really changed everything and
really made me attract to my wife today
um was the moment I remember just saying
to myself myself that I really think
that there's a possibility that I'm
going to be single
forever and I think I'm okay with that
and I think at the moment when I
realize that I'm okay with being alone
and I would be happy and feel
complete I think that is the moment and
and and then very short time after that
I met my wife today
and and just looking back just seeing
how that works it makes a lot of
sense is that a lot of time you hear
people say like oh I'm not complete
until I find that other half I'm not
complete until I find someone that loves
me so when
you say that and that's what you feel
that means you
feel half you feel incomplete so when
you feel incomplete you radiate an
energy of incompleteness so therefore
you attract people that are also
incomplete
also so it's actually opposite if we
really want to attract somebody into our
lives we got to learn how to
love ourselves right and we we hear that
all the time right we
hear you have to learn how to love
yourself before you can love another
person but we really don't understand
the mechanics of it uh we say it all the
time but in terms of
energy if we are feeling that we're
lacking they're feeling that we're just
half until we meet somebody that can
love us right and and and and supposed
to fulfill everything that we we have
been missing first of all that's the
wrong expectation right no one can
fulfill and love us when they don't even
need
they don't even know how to love
themselves they can't even figure it out
for themselves how is it that they're
going to fulfill everything that you
need and I learned that at a very young
age it's weird it's I remember dating my
first girlfriend now I was like 16 or
something um and then we broke
up and then and then I just realized
something just just in my head and I
called it up I'm like hey I have to tell
you something it's meet me up I realized
something and then I met her up and I
told her I had a good talk with her and
this is like 17 16 17 year old very
young 17 and then I was I told her
basically I don't know if you you do
this but I don't know why when we're
dating whenever we're mad about
something or or or about little things
and then I'll pretend to to get mad
right or or or make it bigger than it is
and then when the girl doesn't try to
make me feel better I get even more mad
I get even more angry I felt like she
doesn't care for me so it's not even the
initial thing that we get mad about it
just you just get mad because they don't
know how to make you feel better or they
don't know what you're mad about right
are you familiar with that and and I
keep on doing that and I I ask myself
why why do I always give that person
trouble and I keep on thinking and then
I kind of realized is what it is it's
really me right I you know been
lacking
love obviously from my childhood so you
know I didn't have the dad the mom you
know so there's a lack of love so we
tend or I did want to put on my my
girlfriend or whoever I date and and you
expect that person to know how to make
you feel better what ticks you off but
there's no way that they can because
they don't know what you're going
through and everyone's different and and
and secondly it's unfair it's unfair for
them to constantly have to baby you and
and and and and kind of make you feel
better in that way so I realized that
that was my part that that what I was
doing
um so so that kind of goes back
to kind of have to know yourself and
love yourself first
before you can attract that person that
loves you um because a lot of us we we
never analyze why we do the things we do
and and and our expectation love and
should be where we are fulfilled you are
fulfilled and the other person's
fulfilled we come together and we share
a lot of similarities and we enjoy life
together it's not it's not there's no
one guy or girl out there that's going
to make up for everything that you've
been missing that's that's the wrong way
of thinking a lot of us sit and depress
and you know why is it that I can't find
someone that loves me why is this the
other people are hooked up and and
married and why can't I find someone
that loves me I think that's the the
wrong approach because by saying that
what you're saying is
that what's wrong with me right how come
there's no one that loves me and and and
by thinking like that that's already
saying that you're not complete and
you're not love yourself the person that
should love you more than anything is
yourself and until you say and you can
say to yourself
that I love
myself no matter what happens right even
though if I can't find anyone that is
good enough for me I can't find anyone
that matches me I'm still
happy as is and if you live your life
like that I can
almost assure that you're going to
attract the right person um and and if
you don't that's okay too but most
likely you're going to attract people
with the same uh energy and the same
thinking but if you don't if you're
thinking that you got
to have this person to fulfill certain
things about you well guess what you're
going to attract a very similar person
you're going to you know attract that
person that needs that attention and
that's
just mixed up in their head just as much
as you and when two people come together
and they're both confused how can they
make each other happy they can't even
make thems happy they don't even know uh
what the things that they do they don't
even know why they feel the way that
they are they don't know why they're so
jealous they don't know why they're
giving you a hard time so how can two
people that need help come together and
and have a a a good relationship so I
think that's a a a very good lesson and
it it it it makes sense it makes sense
so in
short uh
basically we have to learn how to be
comfortable by ourselves we have to
learn how to love ourselves and and we
when we are truly happy with ourselves
we can go out there and do things by
ourself um and and that's the thing too
I had a friend she's young she's
probably early 20s and then she's having
uh trouble with her relationship and and
I told her you know to spend
time by herself and and and do things by
herself and for you know time for
herself and I told her how I you know I
go do things by myself and she and she
made a comment and she's like oh I I
can't go by myself I never want to do
anything by myself and or something
along that line and I told her if you're
not comfortable by yourself and you're
not comfortable hanging by yourself or
hanging out with you and be entertained
by yourself what makes you think that
other people want to hang out with you
it's if you're not even Pleasant to hang
out and be excited to hang out with
yourself go to the beach have a walk uh
or or do something on that line what
makes you that doesn't make any
sense why would other people want to
hang out with you if you don't even want
to hang out with yourself so I thought
that was it kind of It kind of goes
together right so um have time for
yourself listen to your audio books do
the things that you're passionate about
whether it's music singing Hobbies or or
something
that is a way and and you're
demonstrating that you are comfortable
with yourself and and you can you're
just happy with yourself and by being
that way you're going going to attract
more people uh with the same uh
vibration same energy same way of
thinking um so I truly think that in
order to attract the love of your
life um it starts from within we need to
learn learn how to love each other I
mean ourselves more before we can learn
how to love somebody else um so that's
what I truly think uh I'd love to know
what your experiences are um you know
what what is your experience what is
your take on that U about loving
yourself more spending time with
yourself and and and and attracting um
attracting uh a a good boyfriend or girl
girlfriend i' love to hear your story
wanted to share that quick um story with
you hopefully that uh resonate with you
and i' love to hear from you and uh talk
to you soon
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