To Love Is to Be Brave | Kelly Corrigan | TED

Summary

The speaker recounts personal stories of bravery in everyday life, from her own experiences with cancer to witnessing the strength of a father who lost his wife. She emphasizes the quiet courage required in family life, especially in moments of crisis and vulnerability, where the bravest act is often to simply listen and support without taking over or leaving. The reward for such bravery is a profound human experience and an other-centric love.

Takeaways

• 🌟 The speaker was initially drawn to the concept of bravery and sought out adventures to collect stories of it.
• 🛳 The speaker embarked on a sailing journey without modern comforts, traveling to various countries with minimal resources.
• 👨‍👧‍👦 As a nanny, the speaker witnessed the bravery of a father, Jim, who navigated the loss of his wife and supported his children through their grief.
• 🏆 The speaker has been cataloging acts of bravery in family life, noting that these often go unrecognized but are incredibly significant.
• 🤔 The speaker reflects on the unexpected challenges that arise in crises, which are not part of any prepared plan and require courage to face.
• 💔 The speaker shares personal experiences of bravery, including dealing with the emotional aftermath of cancer and its impact on her relationship.
• 🏆 The speaker interviews successful individuals and finds that their stories of family and personal bravery are the ones they remember most vividly.
• 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The speaker discusses the small, everyday acts of bravery within families, where there may not be clear answers or solutions.
• 💬 The speaker emphasizes the importance of being present and listening in moments of family crisis, using simple phrases to encourage dialogue.
• 🚫 The brave do not take over situations or become the hero, but instead offer a supportive presence and a listening ear.
• 🏠 The brave do not leave or hide from difficult situations; they remain available and ready to bear witness to the struggles of their loved ones.
• 🌱 The final act of bravery is letting go and allowing loved ones to navigate their own lives, trusting in the strength and resilience they've instilled in them.

Q & A

What is the initial misunderstanding the speaker's mom had about TED?

The speaker's mom initially thought TED was another virus when the speaker asked her about it.

What was the speaker's motivation for going on an adventure?

The speaker was drawn to the concept of bravery and was inspired by the idea of collecting adventures.

How did the speaker travel without modern conveniences like a phone or credit card?

The speaker traveled with 3,800 dollars in traveler's checks and some expired antibiotics, relying on minimal resources.

What role did the speaker take on when they ran out of money?

The speaker became a nanny for two children who had recently lost their mother.

What was the father's occupation in the family where the speaker worked as a nanny?

The father was a flight attendant for Qantas.

How did the speaker describe the bravery of the father in the family where they were a nanny?

The speaker described the father's bravery as organizing his emotions and answering difficult questions to provide a sense of safety for his children.

What personal health challenge did the speaker face in their 30s?

The speaker faced stage-3 cancer in their 30s.

How did the speaker's experience with cancer affect their personal life?

The experience with cancer made the speaker confront the emotional challenges of changes in their body and the impact on their relationship with their husband.

What kind of people has the speaker interviewed for their PBS show and podcast?

The speaker has interviewed people with significant achievements such as Grammys, Pulitzers, and NBA championships.

What common theme did the speaker find in the stories of the successful people they interviewed?

The common theme was the moments of bravery and support from family members during their most challenging times.

What does the speaker suggest as the ultimate act of bravery in family life?

The ultimate act of bravery in family life, according to the speaker, is to lean back and let go, allowing loved ones to face their challenges without intervening.

What is the reward for the bravery described in the script?

The reward for the bravery described is a full human experience with intense emotions, an other-centric love, and the awe of witnessing interpersonal relationships.